Detroit Free Press from Detroit, Michigan • Page 23

SPEAKING. OF YOU A AMY VANDERBILT--THE POLITE REFUSAL Givin inner the ush Off a J3oor A ncl Di ance or the Debs BY AMY VANDERBILT In every community there is a boor or two. The smaller the community the harder it is to avoid him. If he's a big wheel industrially or professionally or politically it may even be necessary to entertain him. Among the things every young wife should know is how to parry the advances of her husband's boss at a cocktail party without hurting his feelings or involving her husband in the problem.

"Dear Miss Vanderbilt: Please comment on the following questions. These situations arise at a country club; the people involved are not friends, only speaking recognition, they are not in the group sitting at the same table by choice; they merely walk up without invitation. "1 Is it considered rude if a married woman politely refuses an invitation to dance extended by a man who is disliked by husband andor wife due to actions on his part which have given him an undesirable reputation? stance it might be better for your wife to accept he invitation to dance at least once. If you are free to do so, you may cut in pleasantly after a few minutes. It is easier at a large public dance for a woman to plead that she is "tired." OF COURSE, if a man is drunk or in some other way offensive, the woman merely refuses him politely without explanation and her husband or escort sees to it that she is not annoyed.

If a woman is dancing with her husband or another man and someone wishes to cut in, he taps her partner lightly on the shoulder and says, "May I cut in?" He does not ask the woman. If a woman is standing with her husband or other escort, a man wishing to dance with her asks permission of her escort first. If the woman is unaccompanied by a man, he may ask her directly. "2 If a man wishes to ask a married woman to dance, should he extend the invitation directly to her or should he first ask her husband as a matter of courtesy? If so, is it proper for the husband to politely refuse? "3 Is it considered rude if a married woman politely refuses an invitation to dance regardless of her reason? M. San Francisco, Cal." A WOMAN MAY refuse to dance with anybody, but sometimes it isn't wise.

If, for example, you were at a small party in which this person was included as a guest, it would be pointedly rude for your wife to refuse to dance with him. It might cause comment that would require an explanation. Then, being at the same party, you are under an obligation to your host or hostess to treat the other guests kindly. The situation is admittedly delicate. In such an in BY BETE GILLESPIE Fres Press Society riter Wednesday was Double Day for the Debs a dinner and a dance and furhevins sake, these energetic teen-agers are already bemoaning the fact that there's ONLY one more week of parties left.

First was Julie Pearce's dinner at the Grosse Pointe Yacht Club. Julie and her parents, the Frederick William Pearces, received in the Commodore's Room in front of a setting of Colonial DETROIT FREE PRESS columns entwined with greenery. The Club was decorated with large urns of pink and white carnations, larkspurs and gladiola. The same flowers were used in low arrangements for the dinner tables for 12, which were illuminated with pink tapers. Julie's floor length silk organdy gown was trimmed in lace and she carried a The FAMILY about Julie JUNE 19, 1958 Page 23 Colonial bouquet of pink sweetheart roses and stephanotis.

Mrs. Pearce's Grecian draped turquoise chiffon dress was also floor length. Jack Qualey's orchestra and the debs went from there to the Little Club for Michael Ann Mullen's debut TB or the Boat She m. dance. She and her parents, the Jana-rius A.

Mullens, received about 400 guests in the Club's sunroom, which was decorated in pink and white with large pink geranium plants. Michael Ann wore an ivory embroidered organdy Dior and carried Rubrum lilies. Her mother's dress was ice blue taffeta trimmed in dark blue embroidery. She was escorted by Steven Sherer and ushers included her brother, Frank, Michael Ann John Scherer, Bartholomew A. Seymour, William A.

Petzold III, John McCaffrey, John Diebel, Tom Tracy and James Forster, Jr. isse Kut she missed I Nothing Like a Picnic Tau Beta juniors met Wednesday at Jane Wilson's Met-amora farm for lunch and swimming. At 6 p.m., they ss. 'JhHK Lois V. Xair "If III) IMII Fm Press Photos FRED PLOFCHAN THE S.S.

Aquarama was on schedule Wednesday for its first summer cruise, but Wayne County Republican Committee Chairman Lois V. Nair wasn't. While the 1,000 minus one clubwomen (who sponsored the trip) were scrambling for a place in the sun to watch a fashion show, listen to music or take a turn at shuffleboard, Lois was racing from her office in a cab. It first took her to the wrong dock, was further delayed by a train, then arrived as the Aquarama cruised away. Murmuring breathlessly, "I hope this isn't the way I show in the race for Congress," Lois waved bon voyage to tbe other women and wistfully went back to her offire.

Here's m'''! Vl AyWW tlie boat for the Detroit 1 1 Dinner Party Coming Up Preceding Virginia McMillan's debut dance Saturday night the Edward H. Jewetts II, of Lapeer, will entertain with a dinner party in Mrs. Jewett's mother's (Mrs. Standish Backus) home on Lake Shore Road The Robert Halbachs, of Rochester, are having an open house Saturday in honor of Dr. and Mrs.

Donald Franks, here from Rolling Hills, Calif. A cocktail-dinner party on the terrace of their Loth-rop Road home will be hosted Saturday evening by Mr. and Mrs. Jean F. Mesritz, in honor of their 10th wedding anniversary.

Guests will include the couple's wedding party and a few close friends. The Philip T. Van Ziles will entertain Sunday afternoon with a cocktail party in their home on Cloverly Road. Tuesday they'll have a picnic and swimming party honoring debs Melinda Bates and Mary Yeager. What Else She Supper were joined by senior members and rushees (about 120 all told) for a chicken picnic surmer on the lawn of Mrs.

Edsei Ford's home. former Detroiter Mrs. Nils R. Johaneson, who has a summer home at the Maine resort. After leaving York Harbor, Mrs.

Newberry will visit her two sons and their families, the Junior Newberrys, in Wayne, and Mr. and Mrs. T. Handy Newberry II, in Stratford, Pa. Clubs Burke wis the chairman.

Mrs. Charles J. McKenna, who leaves for a three-month European trip Friday, was honor guest at a party hosted by Mi s. John V. Pendy at the Boat Club that day.

Mrs. Frances Jacobs is home on Moran Road after two months in Palm Beach and North Carolina. Heading East Mrs. Phelps Newberry, of Cloverly Road, leaves Sunday for York Harbor, Maine, to attend the annual meeting of Garden Club of America. She'll visit Mrs.

Russell A. Alger, of Provencal Road, at her summer home there, and also Mrs. Alger's daughter, jor and fjpc zz fe A I run, maybe Knows Chuck Peterson, former trumpeter with the late Tommy Dorsey, and Herb Couf, former first clarinet with The Detroit Symphony Orchestra, are entirely too enthusiastic about Liza Redfield. She is the only female musical director in the American theater. Fate sent her here.

Liza got a head start, in Philadelphia, as a child prodigy at the piano. She took a degree in music from the University of Pennsylvania. Since then, she has held a variety of piano and conducting jobs. She has worked out, with choreographers, the intricate dancing routines of several Broadway shows, "Auntie Mame" among them. THURSDAY, ft f- lit SSr- i i Irl Ivt ilk i tj iai i jNiir- In Town from Grand Rapids Former Detroiter Mrs.

William C. Finkenstaedt and her three children are here from Grand Rapids visiting her parents, the George P. Caulkins, of Rivard Blvd. Mr. Finkenstaedt will arrive Saturday and the family will drive to Cape Cod, to visit his parents, Mr.

and Mrs. Harry S. Finkenstaedt. Federation cruise Missed 4 1 'A mr I 4 I nmii.iiinimiiin.waoniWMUMi lit- i iiimii 8 hmi utii itiwi THOSE WHO made it on time saw a fashion show by Milgrim's. Included was a checked gingham play suit that becomes a dress when combined with its overskirt.

COTTON CASUALS, right for shipboard: A white linen chemise and a striped cotton, set off with velvet shoulder straps and embroidered skirt inset. CLUBWOMEN Mrs. Fernand Miller, Mrs. Carl Ericke and Mrs. William L.

Tomiinson, from left, eyed this trim linen sheath, appliqucd with chintz print. 3. Rose Marie. Where's Charlie? There is little chance that the summer musical life will bore her. There is small hope, either, that she will, in true redheaded fashion, get huffy and quit: "There are many ways to work with show people.

1 find I can get as much out of most people by helping them along, rather than goading them." Ladies, Liza Redfield is not a passing fancy. She is a pioneer in music and the American theater. There is a chance, next season, that she will be the first woman ever to conduct a Brikdway orchestra. Unless somebody steals her baton, we're sunk. WOMEN MAY NOT LIKE IT, BUT- Liza Really the Score What's Doing at the Some 500 members and their guests attended Tuesday's bridge luncheon and Ftyle show at the Detroit Yacht Club and Wednesday wa3 the Detroit Boat Club's mnnUiiy bridge luncheon party.

Mrs. Ralph M. The Travel Circuit The Theodore McGraws, of Vendome Road, are back from a fishing trip to the Huron Mountain Club ANNOUNCEMENT has been made by Mr. and Mrs. John Wenzel, of Bishop Road, of their daughter Julie Jean's engagement to James B.

Menacher. The couple are June graduates of Wayne State University, where the bride-elect affiliated with Delta Gamma Chi and her fiance with Pi Kappa Alpha. He is the son of Dr. and Mrs. C.

B. Flanagan, of Menominee, Wis. A July 12 wedding in Salem Memorial Lutheran Church is planned. i 7 Ji iff' BY JEAN SHARLEY Free Pre Staff Writer Women are so trusting. Consider those who will sit tonight under the big top, digging their pointed toes into the sand, anticipating an evening of musical comedy at Music Circle.

Tent lights will dim. Audience chatter wither. Down the aisle, in a size 12 Oleg Cassini, will walk Liza Redfield, 27, a shapely New Yorker with pale blue eyes, creamy skin, flaming red hair, a baton and entirely too much class. ATTRACTED by conducting after doing a series of audition recordings, she won a scholarship with Vladimir Bralowsky. She has recorded piano pop music.

Acted as assistant director for an off-Broadway revue. Coached singers, both principals and choruses, Dodie Goodman among them. As a conductor, she will be heard on a new Ford pop record, due to be released, of theme music from "Wild Is the Wind" and "Thunder Road." Liza Redfield will be in town all summer. Bloomer Girl this week. Vagabond King, Mikado, The King and I.

Guys and Dolls. Me and Juliet. Happy Hunting. Girl Crazy. Most Happy Fella.

Every masculine eye will follow her six-step descent into the orchestra pit. Some husbands will not lift their eyes to the stage all evening. It must be dreadful for the girls in the chorus. LIZA REDFIELD is beautiful. Charming.

Worse, she is a fine musician and conductor. She makes you wish you'd taken piano lessons. Women 1. of hope Liza's tempo will sag, but it never does. They kind of hope the boys in the orchestra will demand a return to the beloved, balding classic maestro In shiny blue serge.

But they don't. First-class musicians, Ilka i f- "-T-tr---'-i Wanna hear Liza Kcdfield's ragtime band?.