The Algona Upper Des Moines from Algona, Iowa on April 11, 1894 · Page 3
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The Algona Upper Des Moines from Algona, Iowa · Page 3

Algona, Iowa
Issue Date:
Wednesday, April 11, 1894
Page 3
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THJ2 OTM3M ALTO&A IOWA IN fOWN" SUBJfeCf OP SERMON. Rnd to Me fft" l 1*4* ft —Mutt. .«*. : 36— Oitnsew urn! Itflilfch llfisot thri fcbrlatlun on His Visit to tho Metropolis — An Instructive talk. N. Y., April a— Before lio audience in the world could stieh a sermon as Rev. Dr. Talniage preached ;to>day be so appropriate as in the •Brooklyn tabernacle, where it is estimated that iBO.OOtf strangers attend jevery year. It was a sermon that had ifor them a special interest. The text feelecte'd was Matthew xxv : £5. "I was k stranger add ye took me in. " It is a moral disaster that jocosity lias despoiled so many passages of scripture, and my test is one that has suffered from irreverent and misap" plied qtiolation. It shows great poverty of wit and humor when people take the sword of divine truth for a game at' fencing, or chip off from the Koh'ihobr diamond of inspiration a sparkle to decorate a fool's cap. My text is the salutation in the last judgment to be given to those who have 'shown hospitality, and kind-ness, and (Christian helpfulness to strangers. jl5y railroad and steamboat .the popula- •tion of 'the earth are all the time in [motion, and from one year's end to 'another, our cities are crowded with •visitors. Every morning on the tracks of the Hudson river, the Penn- 'sylvania, the Erie, the Long Island rail- 'roads there come passenger trains more than 1 can number; so that all the depots and the wharves are a- rumble and iji-clang with the coming in of a, 'great [immigration of strangers. Home of them come for purposes of barter, «otnc for mechanism, some for artistic gratification, some for sight-seeing. A great ma.ny of them go out on the evening trains, and consequently the city makes but little impression upon ) them; but there are multitudes who, in the hotels and boarding houses, unake temporary residence. They tarry liere for three or four days, or as many wee.ka They spend the days in the .stores and the evenings in sight-seeing. Their temporary stay will make or I break them, not only financially but i .morally, fipr this world and the world | thaK'i's toicome. Multitudes of them ' -come into our morning and evening j services. I am conscious that I stand in the presence of many this moment. I desire more especially to speak to ' them. May God give me the right word and help me .to utter it in the right way. There have glided into this house -those unknown to others, whose history, if told, would bo more thrilling -than the deepest tragedy, more exciting than Patti's song, more bright than a spring morning, more awful than a wintry midnight. If they could stand up here and tell the story of Iheir escapes, and their temptations, and their bereavements, and their disasters, and their victories, and their defeats, there would bo in this house such a commingling of groans and acclamations as would make the place .unendurable. There is a man,, who, in infancy, lay In a cradle satin-lined. Out yonder is a man who was picked up, 11 foundling, •on Boston Common. Here is a man who 5s coolly observing this i-eligious ser- -vicc, expecting no .advantage and : caring for no advantage for himself; while yonder is a in tin who has "been for ten years in an awful conflagration of evil habits, and he is a mere winder of a destroyed nature, and he is wondering if there shall bo in this service any escape or help for his immortal soul. Meeting you only once, perhaps, face to face, I strike hands with you in an earnest talk about your present condition, and your eternal well-being. St. Paul's ship at JVlelita went to pieces where two seas .moot; but we stand to-day at a point ••where a thousand seas converge, and eternity alone can tell the issue of tho ihour. ; The hotels of this country, for (beauty and elegance, are not surpassed by tho hotels in any other land; but those that are most celebrated for brilliancy of tapestry and mirror can not give to the guest any costly apartment unless he can afford a, parlor in addition to his lodging. The stranger, therefore, will generally .find assigned to him a room without any pictures, and perhaps any rocking chair! He will find a box of matches on a bureau, aud an old newspaper left by the previous' occupant, and that will be about all the ornamentation. At 7 o'clock in tho evening, after having taken his repast, he will look over his memorandum-book of the day's work; he will write a letter to his home, and then a desperation •wi?l seine upon him to get out. You hear the great city thundering under your windows, and you say, "I must join that procession," and in ten minutes you have joined it. Where are jrou going? "Oh," you say, "Ihaven't nmde up my mind yet" Hotter make up your mind before you start- Perhaps the very way you go now you will always go. Twenty years ago, .there were two young men who came down the Astor house steps and started -out in a wrong direction, where they have been going ever since. "~ "\Yell, where are you going?" says pne man. "I am going to the Academy to hear some musie. " Oood. I would like to join you at the door. At the tap of the orchestra baton, all the gates of harmony and beauty will open Before your soul. I congratulate you. "Where are you going? "Well," you sivyi "I ani s o * u & U P *° Se 9 spme a d- •vertised pictures." Ciood. J should Jjke to go along with you and look over the same catalogue, and study you Ifensett, and. Bierstadt, and and Moyan, Nothing more tb»B good. pictures. yo» u f ftifl goiag up to the Yotttjg Meti's Christian Association Uoonia." Good. You wilt find there gym* nasties to strengthen the mus- clest ahrt books to improve the mlfid, and Christian influence to save the soul. 1 wish every city in the United States had as fine a palace for its Young Men's Christian Association as New York has. Where are you going? "Well,'* you say, "I am gxnhg to take along walk up Broadway, and so turn around into the BoWery. I am going to study human life." Good. A walk through Broadway at eight o'clock at night is interesting, educating, fascinating, appalling, exhilarating to the last degree. Stop in front of. that theater and see who goes in. Stop at that saloon and sec who comes out See the great tides of life surging backward and forward, and beating against the marble of the curbstone, and eddying down into the saloons. What is that mark on the face of that debauchee? It is the hectic flush of eternal death.' What is that woman's laughter? It is the shriek of a lost, soul. Who is that Christian man going along with a vial of anodyne to the dying pauper on Elm street? Who is that belated man on tho way to a prayer meeting? Who is that city missionary going to take a box in which to bury a child? Who are all these clusters of bright and beautiful faces? They are going to some interesting place of amusement Who is that man going into the drug store? That is the man who yesterday lost all his fortune on Wall street. He is going in for a dose of belladonna, and before morning it will make no difference to him whether stocks are up or down. I tell you that Broadway, between seven and twelve o'clock at night, between the Battery and Central Park,is an Austerlitz, a Gettysburg, a Waterloo, where kingdoms are lost or won, and three worlds mingle in the strife. I meet another coming down off the hotel steps, and I say: "Where are you going?" You sa.y: "I am going with a merchant of New York who has promised to show me the underground life of tho city. I am his customer, and he is going to oblige me very imich." Stop! A business housa that tries to get or keep your custom through such a process as that is not worthy of you. There are business establishments in our cities which have for years been sending to destruction hundreds and thousands,of .merchants. They have a secret drawer in the counter, where money is kept, and the clerk goes and gets it when he wants to take these visitors to the. city through the low slums of the place. Shall I mention the names of some of these great commercial establishments? 1 have them o.n my lips. Shall I? Perhaps I had better leave it to the young men who, in that process, have been destroyed themselves while they have been destroying others. I care not how high-sounding tho name of a commercial establishment if it proposes to got customers or to keep them by such a process as that; drop their acquaintance. They will cheat you before you get through. They will send you a stylo of goods different from that which you bought by sample. They will give you underweight There will be iu th? package half-a-do/on less pairs of suspenders than you paid for. They will rob you. Oh, you feel in your pockets and "Is my money gone?'' They robbed you of something which dollars and cents never give you compensation When one o£ these western merchants has been dragged by one of those commercial agents through tho slums of the city, he is not fit to go home. The mere memory of what he has seen will be moral pollution. I think you had bettor let the city missionary and the police attend to the exploration of New York and underground life. You do not go to a smallpox hospital for the purpose of exploration. You do not go there, because you arc afraid of contagion. And yet you go into the presence of a moral leprosy that is as much more dangerous to you, as th death of the soul is worse than the death of the body. I will undertake to say that nine-tenths of the men who have been ruined in our cities have been ruined by simply going to observe without any idea of participating. Tho fact is that underground city life is a filthy, fuming, reeking, pestiferous depth which blasts the eye that looks at it. In the lleign of Terror, in 1792, in Paris, people, escaping from the officers of the law, got into tho sewers of tho city, and crawled and walked through miles of that awful labyrinth, stifled with tho atmosphere and almost dead,'some of them, when they cuine out to the river Seine, where they washed them selves and again breathed the fresh uir. But I have to tell you that a great many of the men that go on the work of exploration through the underground gutters of New York life never come out at any Seine river where they can wash off the pollution of tho moral sewage. Stranger, if one of the i-epreseiitatives of a commercial establishment proposes to take you and show you the "sights" of the tovvn and underground New York, say to him: "PIeas.e, sir, what part do you propose to show me?" About sixteen years ago as a minis ter of religion I felt I had a divine commission to explore the iniquities 01 our cities. 1 did not ask counsel of my session, or my presbytery, or of the newspapers, but asking the eoinpan ionship of three prominent police otfi cials and two of the elders of iny church, J unrolled my commission and it said: "Son of man, dig into the wall; and when I had digged into the wall, behold a door; and he said, go iu and see the wicked abominations tha are done here; and I went in, and saw and behold!" Brought up in the coun try, and surrounded by much parenta care, I had not until that time seen the haunts of iniquity. By the grace gt Qp.4 "defended, J had neyer sawed »fc* J way: have for can btieti able" 'l« tell f«ifh vai»f&«8 WiSs /soffiethirfg aboilfc tli6 iffiqflu ies ot the great cities, aftd to pfeaetl against them', but 1 saw, hi the da* tructidft of a great multitude of tho people, that there must be tin infanta* ion and a temptation that had fcev6x» been spoken about, and I said: "I vill explore." 1 saw thousands of nen going down.htul if there had beett spiritual percussion answering to l<e physical percussion, trhe whole iiie would have been full of the rumble, ind rear, and Crack, and thunder of -he demolition, and this moment, if ve should pause in. our service, we hould hear the crash, crash! Just as n bhe sickly season you sometimes icar the bell at the gate of he cemetery ringing almost incessantly i so 1 found that the bell at .lie gate of the cemetery where ruined ls are buried was tolling by day and tolling by night I said, "I Will •xplofe." I went as a physician goes nto a fever lazaretto, to see what rractical and useful information 1 night get. That would be a foolish loctor who would stand outside tho loor of an invalid writing a Latin prescription. When tho lecturer in m medical college is done with his lecture, he takes the students into the dissecting room, and he shows them the reality. I went and saw, and came forth to my pulpit to report a jlague, and to tell how sin dissects tho Dody, aud dissects the mind, and dissects the soul. "Oh!" say you, "are you not afraid 1 that in consequence of such exploration of the iniquities of the city other persons might make exploration, and do themselves damage?" t reply: "If in company with the commissioner of po- .ice, and the captain of police, and the inspector of police, and the company of two Christian gentlemen, and not with the spirit of curiosity, but that you may see sin in order the bettor to combat it, then, In the name of the eternal God, go! But, if not, then stay away." Wellington, standing in the battle of Waterloo when tho bullets were buzzing around his head, saw a civilian on the field. He said to him: "Sir, what are you doing here? Be off!" "Why," replied tho civilian, there is 110 more clanger here, for me than there is foryou." Then Wellington flushed up and said: "God and my country demand that I be here, but you have no errand hero." Now 1, as LIU officer in the army of Jesus Christ, went on that; exploration, and on to that battlefield. If you l)ear a like commission, go; if not, stay away. But you say, "Don't you think that somehow the description of those places induces people to go and see for themselves?" 1 answer, yes, just as much as the description of yellow fever in some scourged city would induce people to go down there and jet the pestilence. But I may bo addressing some stranger already destroyed. Where is he that 1 may pointedly yet kindly address -him? Coma back! and wash in the deep fountain of a Savior's mercy. I do not you a cup, or a chaHce, or a pitcher with a limited supply to effect your ablutions. 1 point you to the five oceans of God's mercy. Oh! that the Atlantic and Pacific surges of divine forgiveness mig-ht roll over your soul. As the glorious sun of God's forgiveness rides on toward the mid heavens, ready .to submerge you in warmth and light and love, I bid you good morning! Morning of peace for all your troubles. Morning of liberation for all your incarcerations. Morning of resurrection for your soul buried in sin. Good morning! Morning for the resuscitated household that has been waiting for your return. Morning for the cradle and the crib already disgraced with being that of a drunkard's child. Morning for the daughter that has trudged off to hard work because you did not take care of home. Morning for tho wife who at 40 or 50 years has the wrinkled face, and tho stooped shoulder, and the whito hair. Morning for one. Morning for all. Good morning! In God's name, good morning! In our last dreadful war tho Feder als and Confederates were encamped on opposite sides of the Kappahannock, and one morning the brass band of tho northern troops played the nation al air, and all the northern troops cheered and cheered. Then on the opposite side of the llappahannock the brass band of the Confederates played "My Maryland" and "Dixie,"and then all the southern troops cheered and cheered. But after awhile one of tho bands struck up "Home, Sweet Home," and the band on the opposite side of the river • took tip the strain, and when the tune was done tho Confederates and the Federals all together united, as the tears rolled down their cheeks, in one great huzza! huzza! Well, my friends, heaven comes very near to-day. It is only a stream that divides us—the narrow stream of death—and the voices there and the voices here seem to commingle, and we join trumpets, and hosannaliB, and hallelujahs, and the cliorus of the united song of earth and heaven is, "Home, Sweet Home." Home of bright domestic circle on earth, Home of forgiveness in the great heart oi God. Home of eternal rest in heaven. Home! Home! Home! 11, GUKAT sins are not so sudden »s they seem. Familiarity with evil though! ripens us for evil action; and a moment of passions,an hour's loss of self- control, 4 tempting occasion way hurry us into, irremediable eyil- Pods. A :?ANDSQWJJ coyer for a piano may b.e made by u&ing a square of plain satin, with border 13 or 15 inches o gold or silver wrought satin- 4 centei of p»le gray, with o> border of pales gray, or plajft y?How btil t;so «f liitne on Land. Theo. B\ Terry of Ollid has lately been in Pennsylvania holding institutes. In that state lime Is more used as a fertilizer than in any othef* inany farmers 'who have lime-stone lafld burning large quantities every yeaf. Of course Mr. Terry heard much abottt litne in his talks with f armef s, ftnd lie writes In the "Practical Farmer" about this subject, as discussed by Rev. J. S. Frain of Clearfleld and others. When Mr. Frain began using lime he experimented so as to find out just what quantity he should apply per acre on his farm. He had asked some one Who used it, and they said put on 100 bushels; others said 200, and some told him this amount would ruin his land and crops, that he should only put < on 40 or 50 bushels. • Well, he applied 2fi bushels on an acre for wheat, and fiO on another acre, 75 on a third, and so on up to 300 bushels. The 300 bushels proved too much for the wheat, but did not injure the land permanently. He concluded that the best results came where he applied 150 bushels per aero, measured, after it Wa s slacked. Now what wore the results? Forty bushels of good plump wheat per acre on all the land right through that he experimented on, .on the average* His last crop had been seven bushels. He had raised as high as twelve. Next he put in fifty acres of wheat on land where he had. applied 150 bushels per acre of lime right through on all of it. Kesult, 1,725 bushels of wheat that weighed 04 pounds to the measured ^bushel. Mr. Frain soon paid for his farm and bought another, and he told us that if he had not iiscd some money to buy blooded stock, he could now pay all up for the second farm. He said that now nearly every farmer within three miles of him was burning a-nd spreading lime. He has limestone- on his land. It is limestone soil. He does not believe in drawing otit the lime and putting it in small piles, as is frequently done with both lime and mnnure. You get too much where the pile is, and can icver afterward spread it as evenly as •on could right from .the wagon. Ho preads with a manure spreader, vith a lime hood on, to prevent the wind from blowing it all over. This lood comes down within six inches or o of the ground. The lime is put in a jreat pile, thousands of bushels of it Je said he had a larg_e pile that had tood since May. As it slacks on the mtside he draws it away and spreads t Mr. F. says always put it on the urface, as it will work down fast inough, that is, spread it on land ,fter plowing, and not just before jlowing, so it will be plowed down. L'he practice which he particularly, ad- ised, however, was to put the lime on •oung clover (same as I do' manure). When asked whether he would apply manure in connection with it he replied, "No, never." Put the manure on some other time. He said that it would do very well to put lime on sod n the fall, and plow the next spring The lime would then work down ;hrough the/soil before plowing, and so would not be turned down when one plowed, but every time he re- jeated that the best results would :ome from putting on young clover. Nearly all farmers here agree that it is useless to put lime on bare, run .lown, poor land. There should be t sod or some vegetable matter plowec down with it. Mr. Davis said he had ;hrown away hundreds of dollars worth of clover seed, trying to make something out of clover before he be•an liming, Plow under a good sod spread lime, harrow, sow wheat and clover seed, and then it would grow He uses only about 40 to 50 bushels pei acre of slacked lime. This gives him the desired restilt. Perhaps itwill no lust as long as 150 bushels per acre out ho thinks better to put on less anc more often, if necessary.— Farmei*' He view. I'oluto Cultivation It may, we think, be safely assertec that among the crops grown upon the average western farm the potato is th most haphazard as to results. Some years when fall comes the potato flelt discloses a rich harvest of plump tub ers. Again there is glorious promts' of a full crop; the "vines" grow rani and green, the stems are thick and healthy, but behold! when the crop i lifted it proves a disappointing assort ment of little undeveloped tubers o ,cabby potatoes. As a general rule the good potato crop is a result o proper season aud newly turned clove sod rather than the farmer's skill o attention; but there seems no gooi reason why at least a proiltabl crop of tubers should not be growi every year by every farmer, floods ani frosts, of course, excepted. We ar aware that this is somewhat hard o: the farmer, but we speak from experi ence and know that the assertion is no exaggeration, Let us see what is the method of potato cultivation usually practiced by the farmer that does not make a specialty of the business. With such men the potato is raised for family use only and so—as with the case with the k'itchen garden unless ' 'the woman" attends to it—the potatoes are planted after the other crops are got Into the land in good season and shape. Very often the potatoes are planted upon the headland of the corn field after it has been pretty well compacted by the feet of horses. Then the tubers are planted in hills as far apart as the corn hills and ten chances to one the half of them are either obliterated or retarded by the trampling of horses when turning upon the headland or are left a prey to the festive potato bug. We have seep fair crops of potatoes produced in this way, but more often we have seen much land wasted and but poor returns in crop. This is one common way of raising the family supply of potatoes, so that it is little wonder that the statistics place the average farm production pf potatoes at such a low figure- But there is another common way of growing potatoes "down on the farm" and it is no better to say the least of it Wo refer to the plan of plowing land in spring and planting the sets in, the side of a furrow, then turning a furrow on top. It is expected that the horses will not tramp upon any of the "sets;" ii is also expected that they will not kick any of the seed ou of place, out the expectations do n well and we find that crap yesujts, ttW apai'tto to e66noifi(cfij. Sttt ihifl toot the dftlfcjirttable\ fof we 1 ierst&Ud tfant the lufee* - eepifi sotee places, {&& shalldw Iff theffi, afld hefe afid thefe lle& with Mi libttiefiso hard cldd i^stlflg he^llS 1 pofi it »et fiefiding td be penetrated efore the tender sptouts can see dtty- ight. In ghoift It is simply impossible 0 plant potatoes ef e'nly in this *ay ( ftd# s it possible to supply them with the Mellow deep bed of friable loatH tfi which they most delight and succeed. This is, of course.ftiost true of potatoes ilanted upon spring-plowed sad, but Is ,lsO fliore or less true of e*«tt pring plowed corn ot stubbie lafid. I'ears ago, when the land was very ich, the potato would succeed fairly veil under almost any circumstances, >ttt times and conditions are chatteed ince then, and now potatoes can only be profitably grown where the best possible Conditions are furnished. In 1 few words, it may be stated that the ,Ctual necessities reqiiired io? success- til potato culture are as follows: 1. 'lire, hardy, strong seed, suited to the istrict. 2< Rich, mellow, warm, well[rained soil, not newly manured. & Abundant moisture, retained by Con- itaiit surface culture. 4. Careful destruc-- ion of insect pests, 5. Spraying iu districts Where of the vines has ippeared.:—Farmers' Review* A I'nture TThont Kra. The world will probably have swung round its annual circuit of vastness thirty or forty times before the era of which we now speak shall have set in; jut the time will come when the people of the United States will be compelled to import as many millions of "bushels of wheat as they now export in order to supply the wants of their ;eeming millions, says Montreal "Trade Bulletin." At the present ratio of increase in the population of the United States, th-.i.t country ^111 lave stopped exporting wheat within the next thirty or forty years, owing to its augmented food requirements, and the wants of the United Kingdom will likewise have shown a tremendous increase as well as those of Germany and probably France within the same period. It would not be at all surprising if a great future war arose out of rivalry I etwcen the great wheat consuming nations, in their anxiety to secure the great outside wheat resources of Asia, Africa and South America, and in view of the great food question of the future England would be the veriest madcap to dream of ever relinquishing her hold on Egypt, as that country is her only safe road to India, which is destined to become the greatest wheat producing country . in the world. Uindostan as a grower of wheat in tho futui-e will be worth more to England than'"all the wealth' of Ormuz or of Ind" has been to her in the past. OtJfiWITANDtttJMOK §AV(NO§ ANO LAU6H rtd ttftUtitti Mirth—A tlie tat A Tfne Wife—I have made $aOO ifcfo oftet» noon. Husbattct —Phe wt "Yott paid only three hundred fat that old pittnoy didn't you?" ' ' "yes." M W«fll, I have sold ifc for five httfl* dred" "My I' tdyl What are you going t# do with the money?" "Thei'e isn't any tnonoy." "Eh?"' "I soldi 16 to n> dealer. Ho gives ma a new piano- for a thousand dollata and allows me five hundred dollars for the old on«i - If you'd stay at home and let me go to your office and attend' to your business you'd soon' b.e rich..' Just think! Two hutudred dollars a day is seventy-three thousand a year."' —New York Weekly. A Nutural Unfltncsfl. One of the- Party in Distance 1 —Hurry- up, there, or> you'll be left! Steinbnch (of the OJd' Dominion Snowshoe Club)'—Hurry up? I dinks I go home. I vas not puilt to vear deso dings, once-.—Puck. sante (iron-Ing Niivy If yon are looking about for a new money crop with which to experiment next year, possibly with the view of growing less wheat and more of some other thing that pays better, let us suggest that yoti try navy beans. While this is a crop that can be grown with some success even on indifferent land,do not think that you must select the worst field on your farm for it Plow deep, manure heavily, and pulverize thoroughly before putting in the seed. A mistake is very often made with this crop through putting it in too soon. Some practice planting at the same time as corn, but' this is too early, as it then ripens in very hot weather and is apt to suffer severely from the weevil. They should not be planted until the middle or latter part of .lune, and this time has the additional advantage of not intruding upon the planting time of the other crops. They should have good cultivation as soon as up. and then continuously until the pods begin to form, but not after that, as there is then danger that the soil will discolor the beans. They may be. cut with a mower, though some prefer hand pulling. The harvesting shotild be done as quickly as possible after the crop is ripe, as exposure to rains will soon depreciate its value. The threshing; may be done by machine, or by hand if the crop is small. With the same laud and tho same cultivation the crop should be nearly as largo as the wheat yield would be, and one has but to compare the market reports to see which is the more profitable. Sml>l>y 1'ntutOBg. Last spring a few Early Rose potatoes were planted in the garden here, near where potatoes were planted last year, and where a quantity of fresh horse manure was applied this year, says .1. S, Tibbetts in "Michigan Farmer." A small handful of strong wood ashes was put into each hill before the seed was dropped in. There was a good yield of large, smooth potatoes, free from scab. Some forty rods distant Snow Flakes were planted on ground where no potatoes had ever been planted before, nor any very near them. No manure was applied, nor any ashes, and yet the potatoes are very scabby. The men who dug the potatoes say there were lots of potato bugs in the hills sticking to the potatoes, where no ashes was (or wore, which is it?) applied, while none were seen where the asheshadbeen, applied. Now, whether the bugs are the cause of the scab, as they believe, may be an open question; but there can be no question as to the value of wood ashes for the potato. Let the potato growers .try the ash remedy another year and report results; but be sure to keep the weeds and bugs out DEMAND i'oit WHKAT.—The European wheat demand is still of that negative sort that turned away from this eouij try by the offerings of cheaper wheat from other exporting cpuntnies. The result is that the present market is i that discouraged sort quite common, February. The discouragements and low prices! are companions now as always. People are inquiring why there should, be discouragement to investors at these low figures now prevailing. Wheo wheat is bejpw the cost pf p?o- ductioa it would noi seem that the superabundance should enter so largely into the calculation, but it ^ ROW as always, a powerful element in the cal eulation. Fears possess the minds of traders. Larger than comjaon stocks in Argentina offerings from Jndja and Bwssia with 4w»tra,li$ and w n or exporters pressing limited quantities upon Ih^lgirtra,*,, 9* wester^ Ejiyope Ignorance Not miss. First Office Boy—Does, the tooth ever'ache twice-?' • Second Office Boy—Of course; It's most always one tooth- that does- all the achin'. "I'm sorry I didn't know that" "Why?" "Every time-1 wan-ted toiget off, on 'count of toothache, I pointed to a different tooth, and to-day th' boss looked sort o' suspicious." Hard to- ITIntf. Little- Daughter—I missed' to my geography lesson again. Teacher asked me where the United States is. Mother—Couldn't you answer that?" Little Daughter—Nn'in, It was on the map» but in such big letters I couldn't see zeui. Heart.* Alroudy Melting 1 . .links—No use laying in any mow* eoal. We are going to have an early spring. Mrs, Jinks—Have you noticed any signs? Jinks—Yes; I saw a society belle politely bowing to a dry-goods clerk that she llirtcd with last summer. On Different IliuUs—Jimson seems to have been playing in hard luck. He-says he sees nothing ahead but the poor-house. Minks—Me told me he was making* money hand over fist Do- you buy your goods of Jimson? Bmks—No; I called to collect a bill. A HtuillouH Hoy. Little Dick—1 heard your mother tell my mother that you studied every night till ever so late. Little Johnnie—Yep; I'm tryin" to got my eyes sore, so I won't have to study at alL How English IK Spreading. Friend—So you think English will become the \uiiversal language? Philosopher-'-Uuq\iestionably. There uro already iu it 250,000 words, mostly from other languages, aud it won't* take long to add the rest. \k xinril On F»J^$S;J. Winks—What's the matter, 61d boy? You look as if you didn't get sleoj> enough. (Jot a new baby? Jinks—No. But a daughter oldt enough to have callers, Boseubaum—So hellup me! Goldstein worships der almighty lar! Shoost look at dot sofa! Ct)ixij)o»ltlou Writlog- vittle Pot—13«$»t hate conipQsitions, to wr;t#

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