Marylebone and Paddington Mercury from Westminster, London, England • 17

IF SENSITIVE comedian Stephen Fry has ventured back to these shores after his brief neurotic sabbatical then seeing the reviews for his new film The Steal liable to get mm back on the next ferry for good is get a a a GORMLESS: Alfred Molina and Helen Slater toil to raise a laugh without success in The Steal share prices or something! They escape with the money! They fall in lurve! The end! dry uninspiring British twaddle at its worst with the two things that set British films apart hideously boring car chases and upper middle-class pomposity Only in this country could you have a car chase involving Morris Minors and only in this country could the chase end in a heady climax where loads of dustbins overturned To add insult to injury director John Hay saw fit to add a nauseating right-on motif to the film with the film ending up more PC than station full of coppers offer you a place to Jeremiah tells Kim got house full of Frestonian refugees at the It was all the audience could do not to shed ecologically friendly tears Fry makes a fleeting appearance as a plummy bank manager reeling out his customary pompous-twit routine to mildly amusing effect If I were him though make rush for the border ASAP The Steal is nothing more than dramatic daylight robbery Lina Das For if ever there was a legitimate reason to see what is laughingly referred to as the British film industry go doWn the tubes The Steal (PG) is it Sloppy lazy diched and those are just its strong points The Steal is to comedy what Pamela Anderson is to aerodynamic design about a bank job though more Gone To The Dogs than Reservoir Dogs and follows the fortunes of American Kim (Helen Slater) a computer hacker with a highly irritating heart of gold persuaded to come to England by eccentric lawyer Jeremiah (Heathcote Williams) who tells her of a corrupt private bank that has no qualms destroying paradise island of Golanda to line its own pockets He wants her to empty the accounts and gets his mate Cliff (Alfred Molina) to help her Kim and Cliff are complete opposites: inventive anally-retentive and no doubt you can guess the rest They fight! They learn to understand each other! They blackmail the chairman Lord Childwell (Peter Bowles) in order to bump up CLASS TWIST 80 WOOL 10th GAUGE £1199 SQ YD WJTHFREE fitting FREE ESTIMATES DELIVERY FRIENDLY SERVICE 167 King Street Hammersmith W6 (by Tbwn Hall) 0181 563 2221g 156-156B Goldhawk Road Shepherd's Bush W12 0181 749 9340 NEW LARGER SHOWROOM STAIN resistant velvet Normally ease I fw £799 vo 1 mFrrWG i NATURAL LOOK Normally N0W £999 SQ YD WITH FREE FITTING INSTANT CREDIT.