Ukiah Daily Journal from Ukiah, California on May 9, 1993 · Page 15
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Ukiah Daily Journal from Ukiah, California · Page 15

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Ukiah, California
Issue Date:
Sunday, May 9, 1993
Page:
Page 15
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-THE UKIAH DAILY JOURNAL- SUNDAY, MAY 9, 1993—15 BEETLE BAILEY By Mort Walker I'LL HAVE A SALAP, FRIEP CHICKEN, FRENCH FRIEP POTATOES, A PI2ZA, A PLATE OF SPAGHETTI ANP APPLE PIE WHAT KINP OF PRESSING OH you* 5ALAP •2 LOW CALORIE BLONDIE By Dean Young and Jim Raymond uwx,1OU WORK ALL. THE TIAAE.AND MOM'S 9USY WORKING,ANC? I'VE GOT WELL, SOMETIMES 1 GET THE PEELING WE PONT SPEND ENOUGH TIME iTHER >OU'RE RIGHT,.,THE *- == \^ SEASONS COME AND GO, *BUT THIS MOMENT SHOULD 96 CURS.' DMK- ANP THANKS TO OUR NEXT- DOOR NEIGHBOR, THIS TURNEP OUT TO 0E ONE OP MOMENTS.' CALVIN AND HOBBES By Bill Watterson DM), W POSTER WDNt YIIN THt CONTEST'.' I TWNX TWE JUDGES MCftt OH THE WE THL WUOLE. THING I VlfW ftV) TO CPAL THE SCHCOV. 80JKRD, HME THEM DEOARE FRWO, TfXKE THE ?R\ZE MM ttflW SUSIE mt) GWE IT TO ME? CMN\M. LOS\N6 \S k P/XKT QF LAFE. W SHOULD LEAfld TO K k GOOD SPORT ABOUT IT WD KEEP THINGS \H I PERSPECTIVE. AFTER ML, REML1 TNEX BEUE^E ON WRE V'ROM? WVEBEEW \MMCHING MW.ETK SHOE ACS A.6MN, HWENT FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE By Lynn Johnston P/3lr3IES,DflNCE,Dfl1F PR/CflRE-J ' 1 | flNV UWVI COJU)BRIN& HER IN "SOONER? HAGAR THE HORRIBLE By Dik Browne PEANUTS I'VE AL.UIAYS UIANTEP TO SAY THAT.. THE BORN LOSER Maintenance tips for Mother's Day Dear Ann Landers: I thought you might want to print this on Mother's Day. I don't know who wrote it, but it touched my heart. — A Fan in Fort Worth Dear Fort Worth: It touched mine, too. Thanks for sending it on: Mothers: How to Keep Them Running Smoothly Perhaps mothers should come with a maintenance agreement which provides a complete overhaul every Five years and after three kids or 300,000 miles, whichever comes first. Here are several points which ought to be included: FUEL: While most mothers will run indefinitely on hot coffee, pizza and hamburgers, an occasional gourmet meal for two in elegant surroundings will add immeasurably to increased efficiency. MOTOR: A mother's motor is probably one of the most dependable anywhere. A mother can reach top speed from a prone position ai the sound of a single cry from a sleeping child. To keep that motor at peak efficiency, regular breaks are recommended. A leisurely bath and nap every 1,000 miles, a baby sitter every 10,000 miles and a two-week, live-in siller every 100,000 miles will do wonders. CARBURETOR: When a mother's carburetor floods, it should be attended to immediately with a tissue and a soft shoulder. BRAKES: Use them often, and Ann Landers Letters to Ann Landers should be mailed to P.O. Box 11562, Chicago, III. 60611-0562 slow to a full stop regularly — to look at a flower, chat with a friend or pat a dog. Remember that the race is not always to the swift and that there is more to life than increasing its speed. CHASSIS: A mother operates best when her chassis is properly maintained. Regular exercise should be encouraged. When the chassis begins to sag, there are a number of effective remedies, including walking, jogging, working out, tennis and a low-cal, fat- free diet. TUNEUPS: Mothers need regular tuncups. Compliments arc the cheapest and most appreciated. Flowers, candy or other thoughtful gifts such as a hug and a kiss can work wonders. Nothing keeps a mother equipped to deal with the detours of Hlc like a good sense of humor, which should be kept in the glove compartment of her heart at all times, pulled out and used on a regular basis. By following these simple instructions, the average mother should last a lifetime, to provide love and nurturing to those who need her most. Dear Ann: This is for "Ohio Hobbyist," who complained that wedding announcements in the papers were getting embarrassingly tacky. I agree with him but was amazed that you failed to educate the .ignoramus. Surely you know that space for these announcements is paid for by the parties involved. Consequently, people can include any information they wish, just as they can in a classified ad, and are not restricted in any way except for outright obscenity. You usually do a decent job, but this time, you fell flat on your face. — Houston Dear Houston: Sorry, you are mistaken. We did some checking, and the policy varies from newspaper to newspaper. The New York Times, Chicago Tribune and The Sacramento Bee do not charge anything for wedding announcements, and the editors handle the wording. The Dallas Morning News does the same but also offers an unedited version if you want to pay for it. The Los Angeles Times charges a special rate, and there's no editing as long as there is no obscene or racist language. The Hamilton, Ont., Spectator has the same policy, but announcements for 50th wedding anniversaries and 100th birthdays arc free. What's your sign? Astrological horoscope* aro for entertainment purpose* only. May 9,1993 In the year ahead, there is a chance that your opportunities might come in pairs. This could make things tricky tor you. because each will require special attention. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) Indolence ?r procrastination could lead to your undoing today. Your indifference might cause you to pass over opportunities beneficial to your general welfare. Know where to look for romance and you'll find it. The Astro-Graph Matchmaker instantly reveals which signs are romantically perfect for you Mail $2 plus a long, self-addressed, r.tamped envelope to Matchmaker, c/o this newspaper, P.O. Box 4465, New York, MV 10163 GEMINI (May 21-June 201 What you know, not who you know, wil 1 '. ••; me most significant factor for your si . -jss today. Personal knowledge can L>^ u'n.rud advan ageously, but social i.or.taws can'. CANCER (June 71-July V2)'lt is impera live that you team 14 •.-•ii 1 mliable associ- ates today A poor choice will not only hinder your progress, it could also tarnish your reputation LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) Start small today instead of attempting to do things in a grand or lavish manner. If you push projects prematurely, you might leave out essential bits and pieces. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Be prudent in the management of your resources today. I! you do something foolish (and there's a possibility you might), it could be a serious blunder. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) Be as cooperative with others today as they are with you. If you're too self-centered, they might withdraw benefits you need that they control. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) Responsibilities will not be alleviated today through their own power In fact, what you neglect might be compounded and cause additional complications. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) Try to be realistic today when evaluating endeavors about which you know little. It's OK to get enthused, but be sure to investigate all aspects before jumping in. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) There is a possibility that you might knowingly do things today that smack of favoritism. This, won't go over very well with people who will feel slighted. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) Before you play what you think is your trump card today, be mindful of your opposition. He or, she might be holding a higher hand, and • you'll end up the joker. PISCES (Feb. 20-March 20) Be careful at this time in situations that require a collective investment. Your associates might, pledge their share, then later fail to deliver. ARIES (March 21-April 19) Usually, you ' are well-attuned to the social amenities. However, today there is a chance you might do something that could cause a hostess to blush. By Charles M. Schulz By Art & Chip Sansom May 10,1993 New vistas might open for you in the year ahead that could provide adventure, excitement and advantages. These advances might be triggered through a social organization with which >ou're presently involved. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) At this time, you might discover a new way of doing somel'vpq ths' pertains t.-i a mattpr of consistent imprmarice. P'oceed with your ideas, even if they are a bit incomplete. Major changes are ahead for Taurus in the coming year. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) This could be a good day to launch a commercial endeavor, especially if it's in an area that you're familiar with and also involves people you know well. CANCER (June 21-July 22) Treat seriously any arrangements you enter today thai could have far-reaching effects. First, however, clear up uncertainties about small ooints. FRANK & ERNEST LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) If you've been planning to start a new health or self- improvement progiam, this is a good day to light the fuse and get the rocket off the pad. You're moving along constructive lines. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) There are strong inacotors showing a levitalization of your social ule. New contacts could stimulate an interest in activities that should prove to be worthwhile LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) Conditions that affect the security and well-being of you and your lamily are about to improve. You might begin to experience some of their effects as early as today. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) A new and better understanding can now be achieved with a person whose views weren't always in line with yours. It you start operating on the same wavelength, the results could be dynamic. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) Improvements are now indicated where your financial and material prospects are concerned. Start thinking like a business person and begin looking for ways to add to your resources. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) Don't be afraid to be a bit of a dreamer in this cycle,; because your wishes and expectations could be realized. Be imaginative, as well as expectant. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) Owing to a set of unusual circumstances which might * not be totally visible to you, a secret ambition you've been nurturing may soon be tul- • filled. PISCES (Feb. 20-March 20) Take advantage of any opportunities you get now to mingle with groups where you can meet new people. Several important relationships might be cultivated at this time. ARIES (March 21-April 19) You're now entering a new and ditferent type of achievement cycle. It behooves you to be a bit flexible where your ambitious objectives are concerned. You'll want to be able to ; make adjustments. By Bob Thaves WHOOPS! /*£...[ FORGOT OUT WHY TH£Y H/4VE NUPftt. TMY'ft TO YOU UP ANt> IF TH* D/IY HUV& YOU A ALLEY OOP By Dave Graue and Jack Bender By Jim Meddick ARLO & JANIS By Jimmy Johnson COUNCIL PREFECT... CAN'T. YOU SEE. IT'S WRONG TO POT YOUR CITIZENS ON WH PLANET, \NE-HfrNE * WSTOP-V OF S\NV\UrXR CRIMES... SLAVERY.,. CHILP lAfiOB...BOT WE EVOLVEP. EVENTUALLY WE JUST FOPCEP PEOPLE INTO CWCIES FOP 9 HOURS A PAY... WE EWOPe SPACE, WEA.P. PA>WWAS ALL PA* ANP TALK ABOUT MOWEY FUNCTIONS • WINTHROP By Dick Cavalli * i I'M SAVINQ UP MY AUXWANCB TO BUT A-n=NJ- BUT I'M AFRAID THAT, BY THe TIME t S4VE UP ENOUGH TO 64JY IT... I'LL. HAVBTOOVE rr k—,, -^

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