The Algona Upper Des Moines from Algona, Iowa on December 13, 1899 · Page 3
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The Algona Upper Des Moines from Algona, Iowa · Page 3

Algona, Iowa
Issue Date:
Wednesday, December 13, 1899
Page 3
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•_ ' - (,'»;*vjf "J-x ^ " "" -. '-Tf .,T' f v r'"L'x*s? DE01MBBU __ UNTHER S Fron Shoes of the best • Here .are a few of, the good we have: Season. 3 PATENT LEATHER SHOES _ . Something never before heard of OOMPORTABLE SLIPPERS are a necessity in every well-regulated home. See our complete line. off & Co,'s Ladies' Fine Turn and Hand Welt Shoes. THe MANNISH WELT in black and winter tan. The Full Dress Turn in button and lace-all carried in stock, fromAtoEE. . The Hill & Green LITTLE GIANT School Shoes. The Gold Seal Rubbers and Arctics, the only pure gum rubber made. Felt Boots i-eggings, German Sox, Overgaiters, and a complete FELT-LINED SHOES AND SLIPPERS. Yours lor a Merry Xmas and Happy New Xear. These goods have the well-earned reputation of being the finest and best class of Bon Bons and Chocolates that can be made. ' We have taken special pains to make the line complete with many new and attractive packages for the Xmas trade, BUT HOW §OOD P ' } ™s is the Trade Mark. C. O. SIMPSON. Fine repairing and custom work. ELEPHANTS GREAT IN CRIME Wlsem h» Hie .Notion They Are Beg , i nlar Terror*. ^Wf-noiui's , jutpresfelve confidences fau b4 Imparted" tuan on« in which a lie knows his l\ him. It smoking revolver In his hand. "It'- the evidence your honor wanted." promptly explained the lusty bluecont. "The gun shoots all right, as these bullets will prove after going through three heavy planks." Magistrate Pool took the two fattened lumps of lead, looked at them critically, and then sentenced the pnV oner at the bar to a long term on tin"Island." The bluecoat has since boon promoted for meritorious conduct— New York Herald. Asparagus Faring. ago it was discovered that '"overflow" and "tile" lands aloritt coast ami river islands in the ceu- westera part of California weiv adapted for asparagus culture on scale, says the Argonaut. The jind the rich sedimentary soil localities united to produce a 1 jmd quantity of crop unsur- !u any part of the world, and _ before our city markets fttlly supplied at the lowest cflnnery people awoke to of the situation. A« . easy to can; It "handles" „ us It does not easily bruise or do'. ' i the simplest of preparn- eooklng and does not in the tp. Its Inyiting appearance dur- t of preservation. There\VL ideal vegetable for can,, , They began to put It up; ptM?B, tei years ago, 120,'000 two- \t pound cans were gold in one was considered that the limit i attained. „-. they were wrong may be if, when It IB known that last " ,v8en 76,000 and 90,000 ca$c^ tjvo dozen two-and-a-half |',%fieh, were disposed of so 'that this year the to- ft fregh impetus p, gigantic ajparftgug jt^^r v »r» , , ' • |wa't< Interviewed $^Bj^ tt swas POOR KATE'S VISITORS. Bo Lonesome She Entertained Herself With Imaginary Callers. A Washington housekeeper engaged a young colored woman from Virginia as kitchen maid, and was much pleased with her evident desire to be useful nnd master the details of her duties. The girl was quiet and respectful,, eared little to go out, and had no visitors, and had come to be regarded as that long-looked-for treasure, a good servant, when one day her mistress was startled by hearing the girl cry out in a sharp, hysterical tone of voice: "How de do, Aunt Jane! AVcll, granpap, I declar'! Uncle Joab, I'se glad to see you, 'deed I is. Well, well, de baby, too? W'y, you.deah little cully head pickaninny! kiss me, dls mlnit! Well, I nevnh! € To think Aunt Sallie's along with you all, I nevah was so glad to see. you befor', uevah! How's mothah? Whyfor didn't she kum along? She Jus' might as well as not. Mary, you jus' tell her how I hollered 'bout her!" The mistress, after a minute's as- fonlshed pause, wended her way do.wn- Btairs with the intention of curbing the noisy demonstration and suggesting that the size of the kitchen scarce- dy warranted all the darkies, in Virginia calling at the same time. She made considerable noise in the hallway, to warn them that she was coming, and a moment later opened the kitchen door, There sat the girl entirely alone and busy shining up her tins. ' "Why, Kate," said the mistress, "I thought the kitchen was full of company— that ajl your relatives, except your mother, had called to see you- wbo was it?" - » -The girl looked bewildered for a moment and then »ald: "'j)f»M,>rn}m .rse just homesick, 30 I bad to prlttent like I'se talkiuMo the '"•""», ,el«) I'd got to set right down <?rj!, I hope I ain't done n,othln' WALKER BROS tended to crowd the theater for many months. The great Grlmaldi could not invariably rely upon success for his old whoezes. He was once hissed at Sadler's Wells theater, after singing his celebrated comic song, "Tlppltywltoh- et," and he appealed to the audience. He "had nodded," he said, "frowned, sneezed, choked, gaped, cried, grinned, grimaced and hiccoughed; he had done all that could be done by brow, chin, cheek, eyes, nose and mouth, and what more did they want?" "Why, we want," yawned a languid voice from the pit, "we want a new feature!" Macready, of whom Imany stories were told, says in his ^Memoirs": "I remember on one occasion acting In 'Venice Preserved.' A long and rather drowsy dying speech of my poor friend Jaffler was 'dragging its slow length along,' when some one in the gallery, in a tone of great impatience, called out, very loudly: 'O, now, die at once!' when a voice from the other side Immediately replied: 'Be quiet, ye blackguard,' and then turning with a patronizing tone to the lingering Jafliei 'Just take your time, will you?'" HOW CUBAN'S LIE. They Are Bald to Be Exports at This 1)R<1 Huh It. , . s said, the mistress, kjndly, i <f ypu'vjs 49ne>uQthJn$r wrong, you're ( J&te, and talk tp youp it w«l nyifee you feel J)Rb%Vf*W£-*PC*'vi*"' "* 'tfooWSwil; At th#, Olympjc ,thea,j;er, Condon, In ^h^n^'Vp bejng'^te4, a, young How Starlings Fight, Elephants, wrote Kipling, after wit nessing wild-beast fights in India, flgh like men and rams like fools, bu horses fight like devils, Starlings, om might add, flght like schoolboys. Hnl: a dozen of them are quietly feeding to gether, when suddenly one appears to have said something which anpoys another. Jn a moment they are at it hammer and tongs, First one lu uppermost, then the other, and all the rest gather round to see fair play Presently -one admits himself beaten and manages' to struggle nway, pursued for a short distance by his victorious enemy. In five minutes they ^are all gobbling and chattering again as if nothing bad happened. No flam- age }s done, as a rule, because the two combatants clutch each other's powerful feet and are thus forced to sit down on their own tails, face to face, but in such a position that they can hard,ly reach each other with their bills. Even when one is underneath he can generally manage to hold the other off, for any .one who has picked up a, live starling can appreciate the strength of grip ,whlcb resides in its claws. ' Novel .Mt>tho<i O f , A npyej way of illuminating a way tunnej, h»s been aevjsed In Pavis. throw the light from many pps JP feet ftbove the sails the side 9f the tunnel, where U is by Jamj^jghec? ^p, a fhe trftini . «T5\" f&^l r teWft It is often hard to tell whether a Cuban lies to you from Ignorance or rnnllco. On ordinary occasions, ami about matters that do not promise to affect himself, he Is fairly truthful, but lie seems to know no reason why ho shouldn't tell a lie If he wants to.' To the average > On ban who hos always lived on his own Island, a Ho is a thins to tell whenever it will servo any useful purpose—such ns getting hiin onl: of a scrape, or securing an advantage, or getting money out of somebody, or conciliating some one, or creating a fe'ood impression. Here the absence of a moral sense becomes apparent. With the Cuban lying is not a matter of right but of policy, his short-slghtod- ness preventing him from perceiving ;hat today's advantage may be tomor- •ow's loss. The statement, common among Americans who have lived in uba, that the Cubans are all liars, is much nearer the truth than most gun. eralinntlons. Though they usually tell the truth, nearly all of thorn dissimulate or equivocate whenever they we occasion. Hence it is not always easy to toll what a Cuban thinks or how he feels about the future of the Island. He sometlmts tells you what he thinks you want to hear. Every man of property wants Cuba to be under American control, but he will not admit it before a crowd, or even to another Cuban, unless convinced that lie too is heartily in favor of it. The tniit appears likewise in accounts of tin- Cuban army. However, it is only fair to say that the glowing descriptions given by the Cubans of the performances and the glorious victories of tlmt somewhat mythical force are not intentional; deliberate, cold-blooded lies. Carried away by imaginations as fertile as the soil of their island, they actually believe their own monstrous inventions. For, after all, the Cuban' loves better than all other things on earth to strike an attitude, to pose, to strut, and brag, and make himself out a groat man and his gentle fellow islanders a great nation. Thousands of Cubans really believe :hat there was once a band of men worthy to be called a Cuban army, ana that they fought battles. Others admit that there were merely little companies of sturviug stragglers, who sometimes flred their two cartridges apiece from ambush at Spanish scout- ng parties, and then scattered. But hey all think they did great execution. Get some American or' Englishman ho was with them to tell you his ifiew pf it, It wl» be dlscouragiugly 4lff,ei'ent.' CubA Is Infested with "af. the war" S9»dlei'e, braggadocio who never gpt within ear* lnff—AtlftHtlc Magazine. *rf • 3*?i"r;~ T T' ,^'ry? *»""ww/•W r «% !P j6w«?'» wtpf tut wj^^mirijKjfr • , •$'> ' ''x 4*r % ? '"• - ^fi*' ' , >% (4 Vt*t 4 $.^ v"^' J '" i ^ "> • - .'•-" •' : n '«N^J!>u ^^ft^MT^S^ r * i# * H*$ lr * j'i s ^i* * ?•* ' l ^* * ' s "*"*' Jl ' r T^ l ^^^4'^ iIi "jl^4-"* t ^^o' r remarked a lawyer the other d.-i'.v. "They change them as often as they change their gowns. It is only a few days ago that I came down to my office to find one of my fair clients anxiously awaiting me. She was In a great state of nervousness. '"Oh, 1 Mr. Blank,' she exclaimed, 'I've come to change my will. 1 '"What! Again?' I asked. " 'Yes,' nho said. 'I discovered lust night that Mrs. , whom I had Intended to leave my diamond tiara to, has been saying spiteful things about' my poor, dead husband-said he innile his money out of green-grocery and ;in off-beer license—odious creature tl'.-H she is, I could never rest in my grave If I thought she would benefit a fnr- (hlng's worth from my death. " 'Cross her off the will, please, Mr. Blank, and substitute the name oJ- let me see, now; whom can 1 leave the diamond tlarn to? Well, I'll think it over to-night and come and see you in the morning.' "And so on," continued the man of law. "Thai good lady changed her will six times in as many months,, and the names in it would bave filled small directory, while the rest of .it suggested an auctioneer's catalogti"." —London Mall. Tho I,iito»t Hunting Yarn. An American sportsman out duck Jhootlug In Maine relates how h« stopped to rest in an old field In which here was an orchard. A flock oft heep was feeding near by. It was not ong before his attention was called to he chirruping of some squirrels in a hicket; nnd he was surprised to see he sheep suddenly stop feeding and manifest great excitement. The squirrels went into the orchard, and, climb- Ing Into one of the trees, resumed their loud clatter, evidently calling the sheep, since the flock made at once for the apple tree. Then the squirrels began to bite off the apples, which fell among the hungry sheep, who would struggle for the fruit likj so many schoolboys. The squirrels seemed to enjoy the fun, and after they liaa , dropped a few apples from the first tree they skipped to a distant tree, 1'or , which the sheep would make in great confusion. After the squirels had thus enjoyed an hour's fun with their fleecy neighbors and supplied them with a sufficient quantity of the fruit they scampered back to their haunts In the thicket, leaving the sheep to resume their grazing.—Household Words. Away Down In the Earth. The deepest hole In the earth Is ut Schladebach, near Ketschau. Germany. It Is 6,735 feet in depth ami Is for geologic research only. The drilling was begun in 1880 and stopped six years later because the engineers were unable with their instruments to do deeper. Hviug I $300 a yvar a man can, In Japan, pay for a house/ food, and two serv* li.i'

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