The Algona Upper Des Moines from Algona, Iowa on November 8, 1893 · Page 3
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The Algona Upper Des Moines from Algona, Iowa · Page 3

Algona, Iowa
Issue Date:
Wednesday, November 8, 1893
Page 3
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$33 ! rfT THE UPPER BUS MOINE8: ALGONA, IOWA, WEDNESDAY.lKDVgMBUg A 1893. AFTER-CSLbW. ft 0'ituwn, her bright mission worked. 18 baSSed liBvond the .vrtdeswopt Mils Winter, who 1n shadow lurked, ilzed. fast and bound the. careless rtlls, 16 ttie Uedfje a crown 6t snow jfgtotton jeweli thrill the sight, iOSe lingering, ruddy . autumn glo-.v ifirns muter s panoply of white. iftt flolhing, ruby dlndem n whiter Brow could gleum more fair jftn btlter sweet's belated gem 'Now shining iri the frosty nir? "1 olMl'H glftlorliiK henrt of fire ,'Ust piilo before this jewel's flume, JO Ico King's dtiunomls retire Ahd yield their scintillating fame. —Chicago Inter Ocean HE MISADVENTURES OF JOHN NICHOLSON, J|J¥ ROMteRT T.OUJS STKVKTS'SON. A CHAPTER V—CONTINUED. 'Meanwhile ho walked familiar roots, merry reminiscences crowd- round him, sad ones also, both tho samo surprising pathos, keen frosty air; the low, rosy, sun; tho castle, hailing him like an old acquaintance; the names Of Monds on door-plates; the sight of IfiefldS; whom he seemed to recognize, Htld whom ho eagerly avoided, in the jfjreotsj the pleasant chant of the """orth country accent; tho dome of $i< Goorge-'s reminding him of his last penitential moments in tho lane, and ol that King of Glory whoso name had over since in tho saddest cor- of his memory; and tho gutters ho had learned to slide, and ? "tho ciftop where ho had bought his and the stones on which he f v ilfld trod, and tho railings in which jhe had rattled his clachan as he went •io school; arid all those thousand and one nameless particulars, which tho eye sees without inothig, which the memory Itcops indeed yet without knowing, und which, taken one «with another, "build up for us tho aspect of tho place -that we call homo: all these besieged lim as ho went with both delight and sadness. His first visit was for Houston, who lad a house on Regent's Terrace, kept for him in old days by an aunt. Tho door was opened (to his surprise) tipon the chain, and a voice asked ~him from within what he wanted. "I want Mr. Houston—Mr. Alan -Houston," said he. "And who are ye?" said the voice. "This is most extraordinary," -thought John; and then aloud he told Jus name. "No young Mr. John?" cried tho voice, with a sudden increase of •Scotch accent, testifying to a friendlier feeling. "Tho very same," said John. And the old butler removed his •defences, remarking only, "I thocht ye were that man." But his master ijwas not there; he was staying, it ap- at the house in Murray field, ,nd thoug'h the butler would have ieen glad enough to have taken his ilace and given all the news of tho 'amily, John, struck with a little '{Chill, was eager to be gone. Only, door was scarce closed again, bo- irfore he regretted that he had not .Iced about "that man." He was to pay no more visits till *!he had seen his father and made all ,'well at homo. Alan had been the , honly possible exception, and John ( §3iad not time to go as far as Murray- ^jjSfield. But hero ho was on Kegont's ^'Terrace. There was nothing to pro- t J;,vont him going around the end of 1 - the hill, and looking from without on i * the Mackenzies' house. As he wont, ( /-The reflected that Flora must now bo a \ woman of near his own ago, and it ', 'was within the bounds of possibility that she was married; but this dishonorable doubt he dammed down. There was the house, sure enough; Trat tho door was of another color, and what was this—two door plates? Ho •drew nearer. Tho top one bore, with dignified simplicity, tho words: "Mr. Proudfoot." The lower one was more explicit, and informed tho passerby that hero was likewise tho .abode of "Mr. J. A. Dunlop Proudfoot, Advocate." The Proudfoots must be for no advocate could look to much business in so remote a and John hated them for .£ .wealth and their name, and for of tho house they desecrated s eir presence. He remembered "" lot lie had seen at school, | ft little, whey-faced urchin, ijrie member of some lower ^jt be this abortion that be an advocate, and birthplace of Flora if^jiTohn's teuderefat ' H.- that had fii'bt H he heard of deepened and moment, as he ~ of that es- jed east and M^lfpavement of future; his first appearance in the family pew; his first visit to his uncle Greig, who thought himself so great a financier, and on whose purblind Edinburgh eyes John was to let in the dazzling daylight of the West; and tho details in general of that unrivaled transformation scone, in which he was to display to all Edinburgh a portly -and successful gentleman in tho shoes of the derided fugitive. Tho time began t. > draw near when his father would have returned from the office, and it would bo the prodigal's cue to enter. He strolled westward by Albany street, facing tho sunset embers, pleased, ho knew not why, to move in that cold air and twilight, starred with street lamps. Hut there was one disenchantment waiting him by tho way. At the corner of Pitt street ho paused to light a fresh cigar; the vesta threw as he did so a strong light upon his features, and a man of about his own age stopped at sight of it. "I think your name must be Nicholson," said tho stranger. It was too late to avoid recognition; and, besides, as John was now actually on tho way home, it hardly mattered, and ho gave way to tho impulse of his nature. "Great Scott!" he cried; "Beatson!" and shook hands with warmth. It scarce seemed he was repaid in kind. "So you're homo again?" said Beatson. "Where have you been all this long time?" "In the States," said John. "California, I've made my pile, though; and it suddenly struck mo that it would bo a noble scheme to come homo for Christmas." "I see," said Beatson. "Well, I hope we'll see something of you, now ytm'ro hero." Oh, I guess so," said John, a little frozen. "Well, ta-ta," concluded Beatson, and he shook hands again and went. This was a cruel first experience. It was idle to blink at facts; here was John home again, and Beatson—-Old Boatson—did not care a rush. He recalled Old Beatson in tho past—that merry and affectionate lad—and their joint adventures and mishaps, the window they had broken with a catapult in India place, the escalade of tho castle rock, and many another inestimable bond of friendship; and his hurt surprise grew deeper. Well, after all, it was only on a man's own family ho could count. Blood was thicker than water, ho remembered, and the not result of this encounter was to bring' him to the doorstep of his father's house, with tenderer and softer feelings. Tho night had come; the fanlight over the door shone bright; the two windows of the dining 1 room where tho cloth was being laid, and the three windows of tho drawing room where Maria would bo waiting dinner, glowed softlier through tho yellow blinds. It was like a vision of tho past. All this time of his absence, life had gone forward with an equal foot, and the tires and the gas had been lighted, and tho meals spread, at the accustomed hours. At the accustomed hour, too, tho bell had sounded thrice to call tho family to worship. And at tho thought,a pang of regret for his demerit seized him; ho remembered the things that wore good and that ho had neglected, and the things that wore evil and that ho had loved; and it was with a prayer upon his lips that he mounted tho stops and thrust tho key into the keyhole. Ho stepped into the lighted hall, shut tho door softly behind him, and stood there fixed in wonder. No surprise of strangeness could equal tho surprise of that complete familiarity. There was tho bust of Chalmers near tho stair-railings, there was tho clcthes-brush in tho accustomed place; and there, on tho hut-stand, hung tho hats and coats that must surely be the same as ho remombcred. Ton years dropped from his life, as a pin may slip between the lingers, and tho ocean and tho mountains, and the crowded marts and mingled races of San Francisco, and his own fortune and his own disgrace, became, for that moment, tho figures of a dream that was over. Ho took off his hat and moved mechanically toward the stand,and then; ho found a small change that was a great one to him. Tho pin that had been his from boyhood, where he had ilung his balmorul when he. loitered homo from the academy, and his tin-it hat when ho came briskly buck from college or the otlice—his pin was occupied. "They might have at least respected my pin!" he thought, and he was moved as by a slight, ana began at once to recollect that ho was here an interloper,in a strange house, which he had entered almost by a burglary and where at any moment he might be scandalously challenged. He moved at once, his hat still in his hand, to the door of his father's room, opened it, and entered. Mr. Nicholson sat in the same place and posture as on that lr«t Sunday morning; only he was o! -, and grayer, " sterner; and nov/ us he glanced caught the eye of his son, a comnjotion and a dark Hush sprang into his face. ' MFa,tb,ei'," said John, steadily, and even qheerfully, for this was a moment. agains,t which ho was long ago "., "father, here I am, and money that I took from -,''{have come back to ask your in^n'^a^ ^ n( j t 0 6 tuy Christmas last thing I will toll you; one warning I will give you; all is discovered, utid you are being hunted for your crimes; if you are still at largo it is thanks to me, but I have ddno all that I mean to do; and from this time forth I would not raise one fin- ger—jiot one finger—to save you from the gallows! And now," with a low voice of absolute authority and a single weighty gesture of the linger, "and now—go!" CHAPTER VI. The House at Murrayfleld. How John passed the evening, In what windy confusion of mind,in what squalls of anger and lulls of sick collapse, in what pacing of streets and plunging into public houses, it would profit little to relate. His misery, if it wore not progressive, yet tended in no way to diminish; for in proportion as grief and indignation abated, fear began to take their places. At first, his father's menacing words lay by in some safe drawer of memory, biding their hour. At first John was all thwarted affection and blighted hope; next bludgeoned vanity raised its head again, with twenty mortal gashes; and the father was disowned even as ho had disowned his son. What was this regular course of life that John should have admired it? what were these clockwork virtues, from which love was absent? Kindness was the test; kindness the aim and soul; and judged by such a standard, the discarded prodigal—now rapidly drowning his sorrows and his reason in successive drains—was a creature of a lovelier morality than his self- righteous father. Yes, ho was tho bettor man; ho felt it, glowed with the consciousness, and entering a public house at the corner of Howard place (whither ho had somehow wandered) he pledged his own virtue in a glass—perhaps the fourth since his dismissal. Of that he know nothing, keeping no account of what ho did or whore ho went; and in the general crashing hurry of his nerves, unconscious of the approach of intoxication. Indeed, it is a question whether ho wore really growing' intoxicated, or whether at first the spirits did not oven sober him. For it was oven as ho drained his last glass that his father's ambiguous and menacing words —popping from their hiding place in memory—startled him like a hand laid upon his shoulder. "Crimes, hunted, the gallows." They wore ugly words; in the cars of an innocent man, perhaps all the uglier; for if some judicial error wore in act against him, who should set a limit to its grossness or to how far it might bo pushed? Not John, indeed; ho was no believer in the power of innocence, his cursed experience pointing in quite other ways; and his fears, once wakened, grew with every hour and hunted him about the city streets. It was, perhaps, nearly nine at night; ho had eaten nothing' since lunch, ho hud drunk a good deal and ho was exhausted by emotion, when the thought of Houston came into his head. He turned, not merely to the man as a friend but to his house as a place of refuge. The danger that threatened him was still so vuguo that he knew neither what to fear nor where he might expect it; but this much at least seemed undeniable, that a private house was safer than a public inn. Moved by those counsels lie turned at once to the Caledonian station, passed (not without alarm) into the bright lights of the approach, redeemed his portmanteau from the cloak room, and was soon whirling in a cab along the Glasgow road. The change of movement and position,the sight of the lamps twinkling in the rear, and the Hinell of dump and mould and rotten straw which clung about the vehicle, wrought in him strange alterations of lucidity and mortal giddiness. "I have been drinking," ho discovered; "I must go straight to bod and sloop." And he thanked heaven for the drowsiness which cumo upon liir.i in waves. " interrupted Mi ,-. flQ s,o» of [TO UK (JOXTIN'I'i:!).] , H?|fc. yiPM/and the children. " S'gegypuv money," said t Old Stand .l>.ys. It is remarkable that, although new fruits come to the front every | yi-ar, there is not a pear yet that has j beiiii able to take tliu placo (if tho ! Hurtlelt or tho Scckcl. Tho IJurtlott ! in a European sort, originating in ! Knglund and mimofi there William's • Bon <'hroth:n. It wan introduced in| to this country, and its nuiim getting i last, it was named Hartlotl, uftor ' liiu man in whoso garden it was when its excellent qualities were discovered. Tho iSeckel is a native, a i chance seedling, found growing near the Schuylkill liver, Philadelphia, 1 and thi.' original troo still stands and . boars fruit. The hartlott is in season all throughout September, tho ; Sockol from tho close of September ! and through October. These two kinds arc no exception tci the rule | that tho quality of all pears increases : in value as tho trees gut older. Tho fruit from u full-grown Seckcl pear ti-co, for instance, is far superior to '• that from a trco fruiting for tho first ; time. * i Tlmu to Jitop. i "You arc working too hard," said a j policeman to a man who was drilling a, hole iu a safe iit '2 o'clock in the morning. ••What's that?" asked tho burglar i in a discontented tone as ho looked i into the muzjslu of the policeman's re-. i volver. "1 say you need arrest." — Judge. the father, John, "for God's rne in this way. . aro still amiable ,> lUi Ho — You beautiful. Miss Elderly — Don't try to taffy me. I never was lovely or amiable. i was always homely and spiteful. He— WilFyou allow mp to say that you are remtu-kably \voll preserved,? OtJEWITANBHUMOB, LATEST PRODUCTIONS OF THE FUNNY WRITERS. The Olrt Stage Driver Hours of n Washington Trnjrody—How Sir. liooohbatt Was Saved from Drowntn^—Witty Saying*. Ruling Passion. Solomon Isancs—Veil, Doctor, uf IVe got to die, I die gontendet. My life vaa insuret for ten tousand tollars. Doctor—f think, with the aid of tonics, I can keep you alive for a week longer. Solomon Isaac*—Dond't do it, doctor. Der brerniuin comes due der day afder to-morrow. To Remove tho Cause. Primus—Collins has admitted that ho drinks loo much. Secundus—lias he said he would reform? Primus—Yes. Secundus—What's his idea—Koelm' Cure? Primus—No; he will vote with t..o Prohibitionists hereafter. Husband—Three hundred ddl* Iftrs for a dress? It is preposterous! You can not afford to wear such clothes. Loving Wife—Why not, darling'? l''ond Husband—Isecnuse the pries is outrageous' and I cannot afford to pay it Loving Wife—O , that's all right, dearie; I thought at first you said I couldn't afford to wear it.-^Kx. Is "May I call you Mae?" "But you have known me such a short time." Not tho Samo lilll. Old Sta?e Driver—I wish I was in Washington. There's going 1 ter bo a lynch in' bee and I'd like to take a hand. I read in- ' he paper that they were goin' ter kill ''Silver Bill," who has been makin' trouble. I hnowed him in Arizona before the war.—Texas Sittings. A Suliomo. "May," he whispered, fondly, as they adjourned to the piax/.a; "I bought a house to day in the country." "Oh, Tom 1" she murmured. "Yes," he returned; "a beautiful little house—nice lawn—flower bed- chicken house—vine-covered piazza and trees." "How lovuly!" she cried. "And it is all ours, Tom--will be, 1 moan—all ours to do with ju,st as we plouso? To p:\int whatever color wo like, and select our own wall-paper'.'" "Yes, my dear," >;e jeturucd; "that's just it." "And is it very far?" she asked. "Too far for Mama to travel?" lie frowned ever so slightly in the darkness. ".No," he answered; "it is quite near —I have to go to business every day, you know." "Then, Tom," she said, gently, "it will be just the thing. We'll rent it to papa and mama, and live in this city house ourselves to keep it in repair—and it will be cheaper for them, for we won't charge very much rent, will we?" And as the scheme in all its majesty burst upon Tom's mind, ho answered, faintly, "JS'o-o."—Puck. Not on Exhibition. Philanthropist (pushing through crowd around man who has fainted)— What ails this man? Small Boy—He's been out o' wo"k for t'ree days, an' ain't had nothin' ter eat; data all. Philanthropist—Do you know who he is? Small Boy—Yes; he's Perfesser Bone.i, do sixty-day faster. Kconotny Is Wealth. Goldski (dictating a letter)—My dear Mr. Schankelhausenheimer— Miss Key tap—How do you spell that Ooldski—S—c—h—; oh, py do vay, I dink you potter begin der letter "My Dear Sir," iindt save de vear und tear on de machine. It, Had That Look. '•This note from the editor," sa ! d !?paceryt, "looks to me very much like a freeze-out." "What docs he say?" asked the office boy. "Hereafter he want- me to do yachting in winter, and bleating contests in summer." Explained. Pike—What is tho moaning of that saying, "He gives twice who gives quickly?" Dyke—It means that he generally gives twice ns nut h as the fellow who docsu't give quickly. A Free Treat. "Isn'tita shatne," said the Chl- cag-nau, ''that a person has to pay fifty cents for entering' tho Fair, and not a cent when ho leaves it? lie enters Chicago then.—Ex " Kxtra Precautions. "I suppose after tho burning of the cold storage building ihe World's Fair managers are uneasy, eh?" "Yes; in the art paller.y they've ordered the water colors to be mixed up with the oil paintings f. r Siifety." Asserted JIorHnlf. Coroner—You say you told the hired girl to get nut of the house the minute you discovered the fire, and sh<> refused to go.' Mrs. Burndout—Yes, sir. She said she must have a month's notice before she'd think uf leaving.—1'uck. Forewarned—Forearmed. Casey (as he looks over the fence and sees the Widotv Brannig-an beating her carpet)—Be th' Saints above, Oi'll not ask Mary Ann Brannig-au to be me woi£e, now, to save me loifel Woman's Trust. Venice, the bride of the sea, slumbered. In the moonlight a youth pleaded with his inamorata to fly with htm. "Let us away in my gondola!" he exclaimed, passionately. hlie {fazed into his love-warm eyes. "Yea," she suddenly cried; "I am. fore d to trust thee! You—" The last battlement of doubt before tho citadc. of her heart had been scaled >•—won't wobble the boat, will you, dearest'/" Sho panted not for reply, but stepped Aboard the graceful craft. l-ald Aside for .Summer. Mi sionary—lleiv you are massacre- ing people after the old sinful fashion Have you renounced Christianity? Aborigine—Oh, dear, no! I was only t ihina- a summer v«cation. A Dig Itiirgnln. William Ann—You h.iven't got a cook here that would weigh, say, 200 pounds, have you? Intelligence I ady—Mercy, no! Why must you have such a big one'. 1 William Ann—My wife bought a 'IS corset for H cents and she wants a cook she can give it to. TraiiKlutod. "What docs V'c non' mean?" "Literally, 'but—no;' translated freely, it's what a French girl says when she wai ts to marry a man and at the same timo wants to refuse him." An iusiilrulion. Rosenbatt—Help, help, Bloomberg. I vas oxhousted!—I cand't sviin any more! ,sM^s^- r $5^$%%&£!$.$z2. Bloomberg (with great pivsenco of mind)—Dero vas a meeting- ohf Ep stein's groilitors at der hotel:-—hu-ry up, out you vaiit to put in your glaim! —Puck. Giiiint Poverty. Dolan—Sure, ould England's proin" down f asht. It's poverty-stricken they are! Doolry—Is thot so? Doian—I ho/ it in black an' white. Th' paper says on'y wan po ton in w»n hoondeid an siventy-f-aveyitsarristed for drunkenness in a whole year. A Ouoliitlon. Brown—You didn't get that Federal appointment you were after. •tones (proudly)—No, sir. I'm un- awe i by poxyer and uncorrupted by patronage. The Average Ollieo-Soekor. "Ho Jobson has asked the President to give him an English consu ship Oij Arhat does he base his claims?' "On his ability to speak the language." Corsets for KngUsli ''Luily I'anpors.' One of the English newspapers recently got quite excited over the management, or, as it asserted, mi agemcnt, of the Mile End workhouse. Gnu of the leadin'g items of the list ol charges was that the corsets which were supplied to the "lady paupers were bought for 3s Id a dozen, or about f) cents each. investigation, however, proved that the lady paupers had not Ieen subjected to the in dignity of wearing 5 cent covsets as their on y visible support,for tho in u aye s conclusively proved that they had furnished a lu urious article costing over 3o cents. Upon thii journal.stie wrath was appeased. HUMOtt* How Certain Would-Ho Humorllt* Beit Lightly Wjth tlilcftnny Subjects. T.hat was a bitter joke of the matt .n Texas \vho put a quantity of jalap n somo beer his friend Was about to Irink, The funeral was well Ab» ended. It is impossible to say who originated the above manner of stating & 'atal occurrence, says tho St. Louis ?ost-Dlspatch, but it seems to be quite generally followed by ttews- mpor paragraphers. It is a delicata vay of putting it and reads much jotter than when one says: "Ho died amid tho most horrible and o.xcruciat- ng agonies. " Tho whole story is told and tha •eador'i) sensibility is not shocked. L'his stylo of paragraphing affords an opportunity for exorcising ingenuity. Variety, freshness, and a cheerful not to say vivacious facetiousnesa might bo minjjled with tho briefest lotices of fatal casualties that other- vise might be neglected by the •oader or very br.iolly glanced a«, $3, or instance, tho following: A man jn Maryland .the other day ate fifteen raw oysters on a wager, The silver trimmings on his coffin cost $12. So. A young man in Louisville exam- nod a keg of damaged gunpowder with a rod-hot poker to see if it was good. It is believed by hi.s friends hat ho has gone to Europe, although i man has found some bones and a noco of shirt tail about twenty miles 'rora Louisville Hichard .Strong-arm, bolter k- own is tho "champion trunk smasher of Vlissouri," found a box last week narked: "Dynamite — handle with jure." "Ha, ha!" said he: :'.yna- nito!" in n scorn f til voice as ho seized t by the handle, braced ono foot i/gainst the load, and yanked it on he platform. Ho never camo back. A circus r.ider in Arizona tried to iurn throe somersaults on horseback .lie other day. Tho management sent jac.k to New Orleiin-j for another somersault man. A man in Now York couldn't wait 'or tho cars to get to tho depot. His widow had to sue tho insurance company. A man warned his wife in Cincinnati not to light the firo with koro- •<one. She did not heed the warning. Her clothes fit hiti second wife remarkably well. A small boy was hanging around a circus in Brooklyn tho other day, when lie opened tho lid of a box marked "Boa constrictor." That small boy doesn't hang around any more circuses. A boy in Canada disregarded his mother's injunctions not to skate on tho river, as tho ice waa thin. His mother does not cook for us many as she formerly did. In Massachu etts tho other day n man thought ho could cross tho track in advance of a locomotive. Tho services at the grave wore very 'm- A Hum MI Orttrinh. The following remarkable story or a human being, whoso regular food was Hints and other stony substances, may bo found in tho North lii-itifth Monthly Register for March, 1700. Tho account is by Rev. Dr. R. C. Barr, a writer of good repute, and tho story is believe;! to bo u true relation of tho facts as they came under his observat'on. Hero is an abridgement of tho reverend doctor's article: "Early this year (1700) there w?" brought to Avignon a true lithopha- gus, or stone eater. Ho not only Hwallowed Hints an inch long and half an inch thick, but such stonoo as he could reduce to powder with his testh, such us common pebbles, marbles, sand, gravel, etc. Those softer stones ho chewed with hk strong tooth until they were reduced to a sort of paste, which seemed to bo very agreeable to this creuUiro)3 curious digestive appaiaous. * * * 1 examined this man with till tho attention possible. 1 found his yillot very largo, his tooth exceedingly strong, and his saliva very corrosive, BO much so that when ho spat on tho iron iloor spots wore left that scrubbing compounds would not remove. His stomach was much lower than that of an ordinary mortal, which I ;mputod to tho vast number of stones ae had swallowed." How Ktfyjitluu Woman Hi dr. A description of the liorsebaok rid ' ing of Egyptian wouun will not servt to render mo e popuJai* tlie ouggcu on of Col. Dodge'that Ameiiuan women adopt the same stvl';. An litryp ian wouian takes a man's s-ad'llo, Uiortens the stirrups until the leathers aro only a, couple of inches long-, sits on Unsaddle as far forward us she can throws her feeit to the, rear, and rules solely frow baU»«e. Syrian, wqiuep < s, pen. do, Very Muoh Astonished. After u decision of tho house of parliament on a motion of Mr. Fox, I i • George Youncr who hud boon drinking all day instead of attending to his parliamentary duties, insisted on addressing tho house; but, beginning with "L am astonished," could proceed no further. When ho had repeated those words lioven times, • tho house was convulsed with laughter. Tho baronet appealed to tha npoukor, who pleasantly inquired, what he would have him do. Sir ieorge grew very warm at this, and declared that ho would not give up his favorite word, ' for," said ho, '-I foully am astonished, Mr. Speaker." By tho advice ol friends, however, ho was presently prevailed upon, after repeating the word about q, do/.en times more, to change it to surprised." alter which, "having entirely for^ott n what ho intended to say," he sat dosvn.—Argonaut. W'fittJl'M UupiV tdO. St. Louis Man—Been rusticating, have ycui* Well, there is nothiug like getting away from the noise aud bustle of city lifo for a few days.. Wliere did you g.>? Kansas City Man-—To St. Louis. A <iru;it Truth. Gus de Smith—Do you know anything about electricity? Mr, Fewcads— -I know • something' about it. 1 ' ' ' ' Uus—What is the besfe

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