The Algona Upper Des Moines from Algona, Iowa on October 26, 1892 · Page 6
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The Algona Upper Des Moines from Algona, Iowa · Page 6

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Wednesday, October 26, 1892
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THE OTPM DES MOINES, ALaQNA. 10 WA» WfiDMES t) AY» OCTOBM 26. 1892, Mllkln' time. he sun's Jcs' shlnln' 'fore lie noOs an' eayt his wnrm jrond-nitrht. The Wft red barn's a glcm-fn' like Some Jewel In the trees, An over nil there rests n calm—ft fndln', rare rlollgrlit— The charm o' mllkln' time In June, when nature takes her ease. "Co',1)osl Go fetch 'cm. Horerl Co.bns! Deep In the clover, Co 1 , Floss an' Bess, an 1 skittish Jess, There all a comln' now. I (ruess: Co', bos! The pails are waltin'!" Along tlie woodland bonier preen, where cool, deep shadows prow. The cows come slowly down the path to Ilrin- • die s tlhklln' tune; Tliey answer gently as I call, with voices soft an' low, Far echoln' o'er the sliimmerln' fields 'o fair sweet-scented June, "Co", bosl _Bp_movin' faster! -_. , .. 7 Up from the pasture, Co'Horn, Sue, old Miirtha, Priie; Kr-opmovln' on. Don't stop to i Don'tbesohesltatin'I top to moo, They re wadin 1 thro' the meadow-brook, now there s a pleasant scene, How cool they look, how long they drink, the water s clear an' deep. An friendly elms their sleek conts brush with mi , 8w V9l', ln B' frinpe o' preen iiiro which the luuphinp sunbeams glance, an o'er the- ripples leap. 'Cp.bos! You've "ono your drlnkiu'l Co', bosl The sun Is slnkln', Co' gnl, an' Kntf, Co' Jane, don'twaftl • lou'll never pel there at tills rate, Co', bos! The dew Is fullln'l" And now they're cnmin' up the lane, they've BNroly had their fill, Into the burn—the stanchions click—how well each knows her place. Get over Nancy—Hot, plvo down-Whoa! fickle Jess, stand still! You've spillec. a brlinmln'pall o'milk! O 1 patience, lend me prncel ' "Co 1 , bosl 'JJooll' an'poln' Co , bosl The moon Is slimvln' Co', Jersey's till I Go thro 1 the bars, bleep in thu meadow 'neatli the stars. Co', bos! The nlpht Is callln'l" A DOWRY OF HERRING. It was tho 20th of January, 1795. Tho French army had entered Amsterdam and the soldiers wailed in groups in (.lie square where they had stacked their guns to have their lodgings assigned them. Notwithstanding tho inclemency of the weather the inhabitants had left their houses and were collecting in tho streets to welcome the liberating army. The greatest enthusiasm reigned in the city, and in the evening every house was illuminated. Near the Admiralty, however, stood one house whose dark and silent aspect contrasted strangely with the brilliant exterior of its neighbors. A narrow courtyard inclosed in a high •wall, with aporte cochere, intervened between the street and tho house and all the doors and blinds were now closely secured. This was tho house of Master Woerden. Master Woerden was a rich Dutch merchant. Entirely taken up with his commercial affairs, he was totally indifferent to the political events which so interested his countrymen, besides which he too thoroughly understood domestic economy to waste candles after the prodigal fashion of his neighbors. At this momentjMasterWoerdon was seated in a comfortable arm-chair in front of a blazing lire. His fur- bordered robe was folded across his chest,and his wolfskin cap was pressed down upon his brow, whoso few scattered gra}' hairs offered no protection from the sharp currents of frostv air that found entrance at every opening of the door. On ti table near him stood a polished brass lamp, a largo pitcher of beer and a clay pipe. In the chimney corner an old servant, whose extreme embonpoint betraysd her Flemish origin, occupie herself with occasionally stirring and feeding the open lire. Presently the doorbell rang and the servant roso quickly to answer it. A few moments later a young man entered, who throw his cloak on the sofa and approached the old man. • "Is that you, William?" exclaimed Master Woerden. "I hail not expected you so early!" "I left Brook this morning," ho replied, with a respectful salutation,"but tho roads are so cumbered with soldiers and fugitives that it has taken me all day to gut hero." "Did you see Van Elborg?" The young man drank a glass of beer and sat down by the lire before answering this question. "Yes, sir!" he said slowly. "Master Van Elberg consents to the marriage, but he refuses to give his daughter more than 4,000 ducats as her dowry." "Ah!" cried Master Woerden, frown ing heavily, "then ho may keep both his daughter and her dowry." "But,'father, lot mo" "Hold your tongue, William. At your ago one would sacrilice everything to love, but lot me toll you love fades away, while money remains."j "But Master Van Elberg is one of the richest merchants in Holland, and what ho will not give his daughter in his lifetime will surely come to her at his death." "What then? Am not I as rich as he? Listen to mo, my son. You will one day succeed mo in my business. Remember then these two axioms— never give more than you receive, and do nothing for the solo bonolit of others. These are good rules for marriage as well as for commerce." "But" "Let the matter rest, my sou. We will not speak further of it now." William know the self-willed obstinacy of his father too well to reply, and sat still in groat sorrow and perplexity, while the old man calmly smoked liis pipe. Again the dooivbell rang, and the dogs in the courtyard began to bark furiously. "Ah!" said Master Woerden, "it must bo some stranger. Look out of the window, William, and see who it is." Tho young man did so, saying iu tones of surprise: "It is a mounted militiaman,father!" Presently the old servant brought in a letter, which Master Woerden received with an air of groat disquietude, but on tearing open the envelope with impatient fingers his face assumed its wonted expression of serenity as he read the inclosure. "That is well!" ho said, as he handed the letter to his son. It was a requisition from the Government for 400,000 herrings to be delivered within a mouth for the use of the French army. "William!" exclaimed the old after a moment's reflection. "I have an idea! You shall marry Van Elberg's daughter, and she shall" have a good dowry, too." "Can it be possible?"" "Leave it to me. As the canals are all closed by the ice.be ready with two saddle horses at daylight to-morrow. Ah! My son! if you only inherit your father's genius!" The next morning the rising sun saw the two travelers on their way to Brock. They arrived about mid'day, but were obliged to leave their horses at an inn outside the village.as neither horses nor carriages were permitted to enter its streets. Broek enjoys in Holland an extraordinary reputation for neatness. The streets are paved with polished stones in different colors, which are arranged in Mosaic designs. In front of each nouse is a space reserved for the use of its inhabitants, which is inclosed by an iron railincr with bright ornaments of brass anil furnished with settees of carved wood. So great is the mania for cleanliness that a withered leaf can not fall in one of these elegant parquets without the family's rushing out in the utmost haste to remove it. \Vhen Master Woerden and his son arrived with siu'wladen shoes, many covert glances of indignation followed their progress towards Master Van Elberg's house; but as they were at once well known and greatly respected, no open remonstrance was "made. On reaching their destination, however, the servant met them at the door with slippers in hand that they might leave their heavy shoes outside. When the travelers entered the parlor,not only Master Van Elberg but lis charming daughter also received them with much cordiality. Clotilda wore tho costume of her country. Tho short, full skirt, richly leeora-tod with embroidery, the velvet jodice and the dainty cap with its :iorder of lace,tho gold band across her dark hair, and the heavy gold earrings thickly sot with jowels.iuado a mctures- |iio garb that daintily sot oft' her fair, >lacid features. "Good morning, Master Woerden!" cried Van Elberg, as ho hold out his land cheerily to his visitor. "You are .voleome. Have the French scared you iway from Amsterdam?" "They have not troubled me in the east," replied Woordon. "You know I care as little for tho French as for the ?rince of Orange. Politics never in- erost me. I come to propose a good speculation." ''That is well. What is it?" returned Van Elberg. 'I have engaged to deliver 400,000 lorrings in a month. Can you furnish ;hem to mo in three weeks?" "At what price?" "Ten florins a thousand." "Ten florins? Yes! I will undertake ,o supply them." "Good!" returned Woerden, rubbing lis hands together contentedly, as the lining-room door was now open, displaying the plentiful breakfast which awaited them. After partaking liberally of the good ,lungs before him, for the long ride ad sharpened his appetite, Master Woerdon glanced siguilicantly at tho young girl, who shyly turned her eyes iway from him as ho began to discuss tha question or the young folks' mar- u-iage. Finding his host firmly insisting on giving his daughter only the dowry he had before fixed, Master Woerden made but a feigned remonstrance to these terms, and in the end concealed tho disputed point. It was tliow decided that the marriage should take place in eight days. As they returned to Amsterdam the next day, William ventured to ask his father why he had thus agreed to Master Van Eiberjr's terms. "My sou/' replied Master Woerden gravely, "do not disturb mo about trifles. This contract for herrings is a serious matter and requires all my thoughts." Once more in his own* house, Master Woerdon shuts himself up for hours in his own room, and when ho at length camo forth ho gave his servant a largo package of letters to mail. Three days later tho old man, with his wrinkled face alight with triumph, whispered to his son: "Ah, William, I have your dowry all road}' for you." Ou the day appointed for the wedding Master Woerdon and his son returned to Brook. This time they wero received with great ceremony. The wide folding doors that are only opened for christenings, weddings and funerals wore drawn apart, and a large party of friends and relatives wore assembled. Tho master of the house, how- over, camo to meet them with so pale and troubled a countenance that William feared ho had some bad news to make known. Master Woerden did not share his son's alarm, for ho know only too surely tho cause of his host's distress. "What troubles you, dear friend!" ho said with a hypocritical smile. "You look anxious and worried!" "Ah! I am cruelly embarrassed! I must speak with you at once!" "Can it be this marriage that displeases you? Do you wish to retract your consent?" "Oil, no!" "Well, then, lot us go on with tho ceremony; when that is over and your friends are amusing themselves wo can speak at our ease of other matters." Master Van Elborg hesitated. Ho would gladly have put all else aside till his distress of mind was explained; but. seeing also how much wiser it would be to take the advice thus given him, ho gave the signal for tho marriage to go on. A few moments later the wedded pair wero kneeling at tho altar to ro ceiyo tho Church's blessing on their union, and immediately on the return of tha party to the house Master Van Elberg hurried his guest into his private room. "My friend," ho said anxiously, as soon as ho had closed tho door. "I have engaged to deliver 400,000 herring* to you in fifteen days, and I have not yet iticceedod in getting a single one. I'hoy are all sold." rt Of course they are!" cried Master WoeVlou, with a burst of laughter; "J lavebiyself bought them!" "Ahv criod Va« Elberg,after staring jom\nt at Ms companion iu utter ^What theft d,o you f£- "That you will fullilt your engagement. Listen to me, my friend. "You will one day leave your daughter a large fortune, and I shall do as much for my son. That is all very well for the future, but for to-day they are not on equal terms. 1 shall" give' my son a share in my business, but you give your daughter only 4,003 ducats. I have not wished to disappoint our childrens' hopes, but I have planned to compel you to be more just in your arrangements." While Master Woerden thus spoke his companion was becoming more and more bewilder*.!. "This is what I have done," continued the merchant of Amerdam; "yon have engaged to sell me these herrings at 10 florins a thousand, but I already have them. You can only retrieve your honor by buying them from me. I will sell them to you for 60 florins a thousand. Thus, you will pay me 16,000 florins, and we are quits." "It is well," replied Van Elberg,who had now regained control of his scattered wits. "You are a skiljful merchant and have caught me finely." He bowed ceremoniously to his companion, turned to his desk and drew up a check for the required sum, which he handed to Master Woerden with another bow. Tho two fathers then returned to the parlor to take part in the wedding festivities. Eight days later the merchant of Brook came to visit his daughter, who now lived with her husband at Amsterdam. Ho found Master Woorden in great tribulation. "Ah, friend Van Elberg!" he criod iii despair. "What shall I do? Tho fishermen arc bringing in my herrings, and I can not find a single cask "to pack them in. They will all be spoiled?" "Ah," returned Van Elberg coldly. "You bought up all the herring^and"I have bought all the casks. I could sell them to you at an exorbitant price, but as I wish to keep my word about giving my daughter her dowry of 4,000 ducats, I will only charire you the amount you so skillfully made out of mo iu the other matter. You are very cuuniiig.you merchants of Amsterdam, but we of Brook have positive genius, you see." "But you got the idea from me!" replied Master Woerdon proudly.— Translated from tha French. HIS TIME WAS VALUABLE. ' Dlb NOT GO ON THE STAGE. '/he Narrow Escape of » Clilnfine \Vlio Wit* to flay the Sknll In "ttntnlet." A California linnkcr 1'ulrt SI si Minute by iin Insurance Agent. For two or three years a tall young man representing an eastern life insurance company has been staying from time to time at a San Francisco hotel. His name was Fennell and many people have been smiling audibly lately over an experience he had. One morning recently, according to the San Francisco Examiner story, he rushed into the Anglo-California bank and said to the president, who was very busy writing: "I would like to see you, sir, just for a few minutes." "I can't talk to you this morning," said the president. "My time is too valuable. I've got an immense amount of work to do and can't possibly stop. Minutes are money to mo now." "What is your time worth, anyway?" demanded the agent, with slight asperity, illy concealing his disa!ppoint- rnont. "A dollar a minute," responded the banker with equal promptness. "All right," said the agent, reaching into his pocket and drawing forth a It is'related of Jack Langrishe, when he was making a small fortune -by giving the early day residents of Colorado dramatic art in strong night- •y.doses, that he once play.ed a memorable "return" engagement in an interior mining camp, where the inhabitants insisted on "Hamlet." Now Langrishe, being a come,Han in more respects than one, did not at all favor this Shakspearean idea, but instead tried to shake the natives' faith in the "legit" by insisting that "Toodles" or "Pink Dominoes" would enable him to shine to much better advantage. "Hamlet" was insisted upon, however —they Wanted it all, including the ghost—and with Hamlet left in. Accordingly the somewhat small company was told to study up, characters were "doubled," and the leading man given a chance to distinguish himself as the melancholy Dane. One problem presented itself. No skull could be found for the graveyard scene. Mr. Langrishe represented to the committee who had made the request for a performance of "Hamlet" that the skull was all important—no skull no "Hamlet," and what were they going to do . about it? The committee considered. It was a new camp, with no graveyard, and there weren't even dead Indians around. Langrishe went to bed that night feeling hopeful. If the committee couldn't lind a skull he would have a reasonable excuse for substituting "Toodlea" on the momentous night. The following afternoon Langrishe went into 11 small Chinese laundry to get his washing. Just as he entered he hoard the voice of the Chairman of the committee in loud converse with the proprietor of tho establishment. * "Want to go on the stage, John?" "Yles; mo lact; mo bully lactor. How muehee gcttee?", "One hundred dollars, and here's your stuff." Langrisho collared the Chairman just as he was leaving. "What in thunder do you want that Chinaman for?" lie propounded. Tho oommitteoman leaned over con- Jicliugly. "For 'Hamlet.' of course; he's going to play the skull." "Play the skull! Why, great-all- firod-crickets, man, how can he? A skull is not a whole man. It's a head." "I know it," responded tho enthusiast; "that's all he'll be by 6 o'clock tonight. We'll have the head for you. We're goin' to lynch him—a Chinaman any way. We'll give him a funeral and all that, of course." It took the comedian an hour, after reoorcririgfrom his horror,to convince the committee that a "head wasn't a skull." He played "Hamlet" that night, but the Chinaman wtts in tho audience, not on the stage. And the leading man soliloquized over tho defunct Yoriok by using the whitened skull of a mule.— Rocky Mountain News. JERUSALEM GRAVEL WANTED. HOTT Commodore Mcnda Checkmated an Unreasonable Con true tor. MISSING LINKS, piece. "I'll take talk twenty min- twonty-dollar gold twenty of them and utcs." "Go ahead," said the man of money, raking down the coin. Then tho insurance man rolled off a beautiful story with sc ar,;oly a punctuation mark in it, the banker all the time holding his watch. "You can't insure mo," said the banker. "All right; but you listen," was the response. He talked till the full twenty min- •tites were up. Then the financier put his time piece in his pocket, firm as ever as to his conviction that lie needed no insurance. Moreover, he kept the $20. _Mr. Fennell went away disgusted. Since then he has not paid anybody for his time. Not on tho Bill of Pare. Fritz is his name. Failing to succeed as a horse-car driver, lie sought and found employment as a waitei°in a down-town restaurant. It did not take tho customers long to learn that Fritz was a green hand at the business, and they proceeded to guy him. Fritz stood the storm well, but the proprietor of the place became angry, particularly when Fritz was ordered to servo impossible dishes. One claya solemn looking man told Fritz to brinf him a sirloin steak, fried potatoes, anil a cup of coffee. Having finished that, tho patron said: "Now let nio have a slice of watermelon pio and some muskmolon tarts. Be sure to have them hot." Fritz hurried off to tho kitchen. In a few moments a great row was in progress, and tho unlucky Fritz camo Hying out into the dining room ably propelled by the foot of the lusty cook, lie escaped into tho street. "Vy," said tho cook in his indignation, "if dot feller stayed hero mooch longer ho vould have' boon takiii" orders for fried ieigles."— N. Y. Sun. Of i he 828,000 divorces granted in the United Stales during tho last 20 years 910,000 were granted at the request of wives. Tho orohippus, the ancestor of the horse of to-day, is lirst known to have existed in the eocene perio.l of geological epochs. Some of tho species wero as small as tho common silver fox of to-day and all had sixteen hoofs, four on each foot. A Cincinnati mother, in jerking her sou onto tho street ear by his u»nd, pulled the arm out of the socket at the shoulder, and the lad ' ul to b to the hospital. A story is told in navy circles, says the N. Y. Recorder, illustrative of the ready wit of Commodore Richard W. Meade, the newest addition to the roster of naval flag ollicers. Five or six years ago Secrfttary Whitney'assigncd'Capt. 'Meado (as he then was) to the command of the Washington navy yard, in which the groat government gun foundry is situated. When the annual estimates were sent in to tho department for stores and material an error was made by a clnrk which led the department into the making of a contract for several hundred tons of gravel which was not needed. It should have been black molding sand. The contractor was a hard-headed Scotchman, and at the ligure he bid he had a line thin"-of it. D On going to the navy yard to arrange for the delivery of the gravel the commandant informed him that it was all a mistake, that the gravel could not be used, and that the best thing to do was to cancel the contract. Tho Scotchman was astonished at this, very naturally, and then lie got mad, and concluded to bo bull headed. He said he had tho government down in black and white, and he proposed to bring that gravel along, and to got pay fo"r it, too, according to his contract. The commandant glanced over the contract, and discovered that it rested with him to specify what kind of gravel was to be furnished. Then he recalled that in his early life he had seen, when serving as a middy in tho orient, some peculiar gravel which was said to bo found only in the neighborhood of Jerusalem. As quick as a wink ho said to the Scotchman that after all some use might be made of the gravel, if it was only tho right sort; in fact, the navy was badly in need of a quantity of just such gravel. The contractor growled that that was something like business, and ho was glad tho commandant was coming over to his view of it. Capt. Meado then explained to him with particularity and groat good nature that the gravel required was of such and such a nature, and ho could get all ho wanted of it near Jerusalem. On its delivery, he added, ho would take great pleasure in seeing that it was fairly weighed, inspected and paid for. The Scotchman took his hat and walked, out without a word. Ho has never said "gravel" to the commandant since. By this ready piece of wit Capt. Moade saved the government several thousands of dollars. Preparing for an Emergency. Lieutenant (to his orderly)—"Johann, go to the restaurant and bring mo a beefsteak with onions." Orderly—"Lieutenant, I 'take the liberty of reminding you that you are invited out to dinner to-day." "Where have I boon invited out to dinner?" "You have been invited to dine with the privy councilor, Von Schmidt." "So I have to dine with the old miser. I must not go there unprepared. Johann, go to the restaurant aud bring me two beefsteaks with 9*l99t>"' • ai> Siftinqs. _ ____ .*- -W- Georgia has a mockingbird which canncit only talk but whistle almost any tune it hears. A few years back over 15,000,000 leaches were used medicinally in England every year. Wellsvillc, Mo., has twice as many dogs as inhabitants. It has 1,740 res idents and 3,58J dogs. The greatest distance covered by a steam vessel in one hour's run is fixed at twenty-six miles. The drive well, one of the simplest of inventions, has yielded its inventor $2,000,000 in royalties. The soil of Hayti is very fertile. Corn is easily grown and three crops can be raised annually. In' Pentonville prison, out of 1,000 convicts at one time in jail, 757 had been Sunday scholars. For every four shillings spent in England on drink, only a halfpenny is expended on education. A hippometer, invented by a French ollicer, will measure the paces and ground covered by a horse. A stream in Arizona possesses the peculiar power of petrifying all soft substances thrown into it. Hyphenated names are increasing among New York fashionable people at a rate that suggests a fail. Sweden is the most protcstant country, for out of a population of 4,774,400 only 810 are Roman catholics. ' The Guadalonpc bees lay their honey in bladders of wax about as large as a pigeon's egg, and not in combs. The poet Burns spelled his name Bin-ness (his family name) until the publication of his poems in 1780. Fifteen thousand children arc numbered in the membership of tho Norwegian Total Abstinence society. February is the month in which the greatest number of births occur; JUue lie mouth in which occur tho fewest. The public libraries of all Europe put together contain abo-iit 21.00J.OJO volumes; those of Amoriea'SJ.OOO.OOO. Iu Corfu sheets of paper pass for money. One siieet buys one quart of rice or twenty sheets a piece of hemp cloth. Tho prolix "O" before so many uaviics of Irishmen is an abbreviation of the word Ogha, meaning grandchild. A man in West Virginia has been sent to jail for opening a letter addressed to his wife revealing her infidelity. Gallilco's first telescope was made ,out of a common lead pipe, into the ends of which were glued ordinary spectacle glasses. A Gorman of science has shown that the lands of Germany devoted to grains used in beer production would support 53,000,000 people. Free baths are advocated in St. Louis as a means of preventing the loss of about forty I, >ys who annually drown in the Mississ-.-.a river at that point. Applicants l'.>r cortilieatcs to teach in the schools of Birmingham, Ala., are required to pay an examination fee of $1, which is applied to the library fund. The new science of experimental psychology aims at measuring tho mental capacities of men a.s the aii- thropometrist measures their phvsical capacities. A bachelor in Baltimore recently gave as reason for his refusal to marry that ho considered yotmir married women the most ill-behaved creatures' in existence. The famous Trcadwell mine in Alaska, which has yielded mire than i-3,OJJ,OJJ iu gold bullion, was purchased by the man for whom it was named for $3JO. "Love your wife as you would love your soul, but beat her as you would your fur," is said to be a doctrine by which the Russian peasant guides his matrimonial relations. Examination of the human skin with the most powerful microscopes reveals tho fact that it is covered with minute scales, over-lapping each other exactly like those of a fish. An old way of interrogating fate in lore affairs is to slice an apple in two with a sharp knife. If this can bo done without cutting a seed tho wish of the heart will be fulfilled. It is proposed in Philadelphia to restrict bicyclists to a speed of six miles an hour, bar them from tho pavements, compel them to take out a license and to carry an alarm boll. Some very odd single names can be found in tho registrar's ollico in London, as "Righteous," "Happy," "Hopeful," "Obedient," winding up wit h a triplet of "Faith," "Hope" and "Charity." Penny savings' banks are connected with tho public schools of Bel'dum and 170,000 of tho 600,000 primaT-y pupils have deposited over 500,000 francs. Great Britain has also established the penny banks. The annual report of the state almshouse at Towksbury, Mass., for 1891 shows that there wero 2,915 persons admitted, of whom only 871 wero born ni Massachusetts, while 1,024 were born in Ireland. A Philadelphia optician makes a special summer thermometer which reo- isters 10 degrees of heat loss than tfio actual temperature, and ho says that persons with vivid imaginations oka keep cool with one in tho house. In Australia there are caterpillars from six inches to a foot Ion!,, and when a young lady has one of them drop on her back hair she says something in a seven-octavo voice with a calliope attachment rung on to it. A gigantic clock has how be on the second platform of tower in Paris, and it is as as a line specimen of scientinV mechanical work as it is tiott as being the highest timekeeper m world. . l " A Pottstown lady is in search of owner for a silver thimble which declares she found imbedded in tu center of a ham which she was slin;«j She would also like to have some planation of how the thimbla there. The Scandinavian races think tlJ spirits can be driven away and witSJ kept at bay by a knife stuck in ? house or nails driven up. These ra have held from time immemorial idea that it was lucky to lind a i.! f of iron. * The points of the compass can u told from trees by very simple ousel rations. The side" of the tree in which moss is found is the north the tree bo exposed to the sun \\ heaviest and longest limbs will b 0 „ the sout)i side. Natural gas has been discovered the shore of the Groat Salt Lake, wi in ten "miles of Salt Lake City.' Sei oral wells have already been put ilow to the depth of G5) feet, and it is sii 4-1.««• Kfl /\rli\ niU\ .-...I.!.. £ i * *** gas at that 50,000,000 cubic feotoV now flowing daily. The chances are that the man wh wrote an immortal book may h av something worthy to • say even in posthumous book. Henry do Rothi child has secured a newly discovers manuscript from the pen of Lo S'nn author of "Gil Bias." It is an open eomique, entitled "Arloqnin Colonel' and is written with remarkable ell gauco and wit. FOOLING THE MILCH COWS. Natives of India Resort, to a Strange D( vice—Hindoo Fatalism. J. W. Carter, of Cairo, in payment of a wager, crawled through a 8 ~ in tho presence of several hundredi eo- ple who had assembled to witness^ feat. The sewer was inches in diameter and only sixteen 120 foot lou<r. Not even Kipling can do ! more tha hint at the awful problems of Inclu It is one thing to read of its condition: says a writer in tho Boston Transcrip it is another to face them. I wish could tell you what the journey to Te ogu from the coast was like—my fir; introduction to India. Fifty miles- aud a two days' journey! If we mak two miles an hour it is counted goof speed. Sand and sun, a glare auovl and a glare beneath. Practically nl vegetation; the trees look pestilonca stricken. There never comes a timl when they seem to renew their loaves though sometimes we used to thin they moulted; the old leaves ratt! oil, and still there are leaves on th trees, but they never look new. ( course I am speaking of my own pai of India; near tho rank vegetation c the jungles it is doubtless differen And one day is like another; a yea like another; a thousand years like an other thousand years. Tho impassiv native stalling the calf skin, that hi cow may be deceived and let dow milk, might be his own immemorial! great grandfather, for all the advanc he has made on his grandfather's hat its of mind or body or soul. You don know what I mean about stuffing th calf? They believe the cow will giv no milk unless the calf takes lirst il share; so when a calf dies they stuff i —with weird results, I assure you- and solemnly lead the cow to wher this appalling caricature is propped n on sticks every night before they mil her. The Hindoo fatalism extends eve to the. intellectual sido of life. Ii grammar with them, as in destiny, thing is so bocauso it is so; fatalisn; kills out reason as it kills out spiritua elTort and aspiration. I shall neve forget trying to got an explnnatio from a Hindoo teacher of finding, it some of their writings, a plural sub stantive mated to a singular verb. "Why does not this plural noun tak a plural verb?" "Because it takes a singular verb. "Why?" "Because it is ri"ht that it should d so." "Why wouldn't it be right that i should take a plural verb?" " "Because it would bo wrong." "But I thought plural substantive always took plural verbs?" "They do." "Yet this one docs not?" "No, this one does not." "What rule governs it, then?" "There is no rule. It does so bo cause it is right that it should do so." Did You JSver Try? A mixture of alum, glycerine, vinegar and water for mosquito bites? _ Salt or ashes for removing discolors- tions from coffee cups or other dishes? Cleaning the lint from a clothes wriiiirer with a cloth saturated in kerosene? Alcohol to remove grass stains from tho children's white aprons, skirts, etc.? ' Pulverized chalk and ammonia for removing stains from marble basins and closet bowls? To clean a gilt picture frame by using a sponge wot with hot spirits of wine or oil of turpentine, then leaving it to dry? To cook onions, cabbage or turnips without having tho odor escape to all parts of tho house? Ii 1 you have, then you probably failed, even if you had » dish of vinegar on tho slove. To do over the much-used baby carriage, staining with equal parts of solution of extract of logwood and solution of salTron in diluted spirits pi wino, with a solution of tin thrown in for loner 1 —Wood Homoheepiii;/. Feminine Malice. Miss Esmarelda Longcoflln and Birdie MoGiiinis, both belles of Harlem, do not loyo each other, excessively. Not long since Tom An jerry called on Miss Lougcollin, and during tho conversation they came to talk about Miss Me- Giunis. 9 "She has beautiful auburn locks, remarked Miss Lougcolllii. "Last time I saw her," replied 'loin, "her hair was quite dark. 1 think sli? puts oil ou her hair to make it too* darker." "I should be afraid to go near her- Pouring oil ou lire is a risky business said Esimoralda, maliciously. """'

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