The Knoxville News-Sentinel from Knoxville, Tennessee • 57

't A I1NH SIMM VIM1MIO l-V-Wfi E7 Know how to stay cool as imbibing tastes evolve JENNIFER ROSEN Wine it in with aix gurgling loudly Then nod sagely and murmur stuff" Funky is good because it speaks of earth and of the fellow diners will swoon as your manly trophy wine is decanted like just so stock bubble mega-cool: terroir wine The kind that comes from a single half-acre vineyard in Outer Blaphonia Weeded harvested stomped and vinted by an old guy with calloused hands and the artistic sensibilities of a concert violinist So in tune with the earth and the seasons is he that the grapes' talk to him quirky wine with perhaps a putrid smelL Suck buttered-up Wonder Bread is due for a comeback be the same hip-to-be-square gestalt that compels your well-pierced teenager to exhume your old mint-green ruffled tuxedo shirt and start wearing it around Yes the same one you were wearing ou in the perm and wide sideburns in those wedding photos that you had shredded CooL the new hot Contact Jennifer Rosen of the Rocky Mountain News at www rockymourrtainnewsxom pronounce Portugal: Once-trashy vinho verde as well as dry reds from Doura Italy Friuli Veneto and all of Sicily Hippest grapes: lagreinfiano nero aglianico and anything starting with a Alra on the bus: Austrian gruner veltliner German and Alsatian sylvanei South African sauvignon blanc and Argentine malbec and torrontes It seems to me that chardonnay long derided by the in-crowd as nothing but fine line between disgusting and delicious a line the general public with its bland corporate taste is far too cowardly to approach Some cutting-edge regions: Spain Especially the areas of Monsanto Priorato and Valencia Hippest grapes include albarino monastrell gamacha and anything else never heard of and quite know how to I was having dinner the other night with my ex-husband Mike at one of those Chinese restaurants that axe considered upscale because their chopsticks have fewer splinters When Mike latches on to a habit nothing less than Category 4-force winds can break it I had to stop him from reilexively ordering a tannic cabernet heavily laced with American oak Never mind that only Oval tine could be worse for washing down the sweetsouifirecracker-hot food ordered It was the priciest wine on the list and therefore the best right? Logical strategy Mike a pretty suave guy The cuffs of his shirts are monogrammed When you come back to the table from the bathroom he stands up But he has a lot on his mind what with making the world safe for capitalism Years ago all a gentleman needed in order to order wine with aplomb was a wallet-size chart of French vintages But now with new wineries opening every day and a million bottles barking downon the shevesfor attention a guy supposed to keep up? what you like!" goes the rallying cry of the antisnob movement Sure Look like an idiot Hike the boss to dinner and order white zia But whatever your own tastes may be it hurt to know the cool thing to order Consider it a life skill like knowing how to tip carve a turkey or fend off stampeding elephants with your umbrella all men secretly want to be James Bond dry of aryipit and automatically wired into the latest trend? women toes if they rather date him? While fashionable to pretend otherwise there are mdeed dorky and cool wines An assorted in-crowd of master sommeliers and the opinion-making wine press has weighed in on cutting-edge wine wine so cool that when you order it the sommelier ives a knowing wink meaning in our league boy" First not cook money Forget about slapping down a few benjamins so We gjve Varicose Veins the treatment they deserve As the Ugest medal poetise in It nrtydsiakdlDplvmwjoM wins wd leg ulcers made a rflleiBu in thousands of people sites Oder your snipe koUiyankinrtM end jtao anil not Extant (ifttfor the hoax ad eiayoaeoa poor fad Mtkwwnp paper pbta With a speriabing in al aspects of win cfceaseandutiagstale-of-lhe-art non-sugjcd beabnent options thin dries of America can help you get back the fags that you low And uith hxfayt (amble rnMIahntl rrti Wfc aw commuted to furthering research within the field of is ame aooessMe than ewe In tad our pubtshed icseudi has helped lead the adnoncement of todY treatment options VeinVci Tablescapes benefit tea set News Sentinel Staff and craft HpmrrctQfrarinrtq ft will be from 2-5 pm today and 11 aan-3 pm Monday at the Blount County Public Library 508 Cusick St Maryville Tickets are $15 today and include a food plate and beverage similar to a high tea and $10 for Monday which includes a dessert plate and beverage Tickets may be obtained at the library by calling 865-982-098L or Monday tickets will be available at the door Hie Blount County Friends the Library and Beta Sigma will sponsor the fourth annual Holiday Tablescapes today and Monday This year event is themed Celebrations With Tune at All proceeds will benefit the library Holiday Thblescapes allows guests to view various holiday settings while enjoying refreshments art live music of Phi the Tfea table -LINICS OF AMERICA since i a I Cal 1-800-660-VHN today to schedule a consultation Keith LCampbeMD Knonafe V800-660-VEIN veindnicuom fV' u-r: 4 -A Vv -V- iT' 'V fr 'f t) 1 to benefit Hospital Major Event Sponsors GOODYs The William Stokely Jr FOUNDATION ''i'p) Show DateslndTimes: Wednesday November 23 Thursday November 24 Friday November 25 Saturday November 26 Sunday November 2Z Noon Adults: $800 Children 4-11 $400 Children Under 4 Yrs: Free IB fflEEfiAL -N WBIR-TV i- 1077 South College tWi iar 1 Miym fflati- I ill to? i i i vis i :4 -i iuwwrm(raj A Chance to Win a Fantasy Tree and Other Great Prizes from Visitors can purchase a raffle ticket for just $5 for their chance to win a Fantasy tree and several other great prizes courtesv of Target Stores! 1st prize is a beautiful 7-foot tree surrounded by toys holiday goodies and much more 2nd prize is a sleigh toll of electronics equipment 3rd prizels a $1 000 Target shopping spree and 4th prize is a $500 shopping spree Tickets are available at the Fantasy of Trees event winners will be announced on Sunday November 27.