The Independent from London, Greater London, England • 50

28 television THE DEPENDENT SECTION TWO-TUESWr 28 MMT1996 Serena Mackesy blocks of the UAF, he noted, mournfully, that "the old Bedu way of life, which survived virtually unchanged for centuries, has now vanished forever." Nonetheless, there were delights, the greatest of which were Gall himself, and his co-traveller, Robin Hitchcock. The veteran reporter, who resembles Arthur Mullard in all but speech, showed a very attractive streak of old-style eccentricity. He chatted with his camel prophet says love My theatrically, an ability to ham it up, that has become rare in mis era of naturalism andniethodmchenibk curls and a fetching black frock coat, he chucked Jiimself about and burbled about loggp sciewdiiveis with the verve of tha greats. Very impressive. Sadly, the same could not be said for the film.

A co-ptoductkn with UnwersallUevisioji, it quiddy became' clear that the Americans had lost the plot Even the credits were dfcap-pomting: the theme tune, orchestrated instead of whooshed out on a synthesiser, wasbareh recognisable. And no one had told mem that we Bleed spotting the strings holding up the Tardis. The main word that sprang to mind was The opening sequence, with its portentous voice-over, was Superman TV. The San Francisco of 1999 was a spit for the Los Angeles at Blade Runner. The girlie sidekick, a surgeon called Grace Holloway (Daphne Ashbrook) first resembled Cher at the opera in Moonstruck and Susan.

And as for the dastardly Master (Eric Roberts): he combined the performances of Amie in The Terminator and Ibmmy Lee Jones in Under Siege with little of the Sand either. Add a dash of Indiana Jones, a hint of ER, a smidge of Candytnan, a pinchof Axptf Abuc and verbal mflex-tonsfrom Bill and led and you've got an idea. All that, and a snog as well What is the world coming to? A question abo raised by the aptly named Sandy Gall as he crossed it Bssslr(artsr(BBC2X a desert which takes up half a million square miles of the Arabian peninsula. Gall was to fol-tow the footsteps of Wilfred Thesiger, who went across it by camel in 1947, a time when the Bedouin were still lurking among the sand dunes and robbing each other. Frying out over the tower The death last week of the delightful Jon Fertwee has a ring of irony in the light of the concurrent res-lirrcction of Dector Mm (BBCl), a character with a tendency to survive death itself.

A publicity person would rave been hard pushed to dream up a better stunt Pertwee's tenancy of the Tardis from 1970 to 1974 is widely regarded as the golden era of the series. Tom Baker had a heroic stab at the role, but no one could quite match the Edwardian self-expression, the stick-insect stalk. Of course, Doctor Who was a series with two very distinct characteristics. Firstly, it was very BBC It fitted the Blue Beter era: the special effects con-. sisting of loo rolls, washing-up bottles and sticky-backed plastic.

It had none of the production values of US series "file Star Thek. This was partly because the Ttekkieshad the Mqjave desert for' backdrops whQe our teams had to your camel and I think I'm beginning to fall in love just a little with make do with a rainswept quarry, but mere was something very British about the refusal to espouse anything flashy. Most Brits who left infancy between 1963 and 1980 got their first experience of pleasurable terror from the Daleks. It never occurred to us that their quest tor universal domination could be thwarted by building stairs. The other characteristic is that every new Doctor was thought to be Not as Good as the Old One.

It was inevitable that Paul McGann would face the same tirade. The good news is that he was every tit as good. He has the perfect touch: the part requires a and he and Hitchcock swapped phrases like "sparrowfart" and "the morning George" with gusto. Gall was full of anecdotes: how the Sultan of Oman shot himself in the foot during the 1970 revolution, how an oil firm lost an 85-ton bulldozer in quicksand. This was the best of tolerant culture clash, right down to the sneaked scotch behind a backup jeep.

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