The News and Observer from Raleigh, North Carolina • 178

WI NU THE BEST AND WORST OF EVERYTHING 71Er it i 2 I 1 t- LeU (-N irk 1) Ax 1 to 1 I7 111 ti II rammMAR 9 9 America held onto America's Cup as Dennis Conner steered the catamaran Stars Stripes to victory over monohull New Zealand Whiz-kid Steve Jobs now 33 unveiled his state-of-the-art NeXT computer Superstars (from left: Gabriel Chapman N'Dour Sting Baez and Springsteen) did a world tour for Amnesty International Ent Prefictim? ft: F's Ent Pcrunzi Ad Ent Pi East Identity Nun From The Wall Street Journal: From New York magazine: From Ne From The Old Farmer's Almanac: From United Press International: Sham FO Wow g41 ttsew kacki glOw fon ivia ow for kolket NA god Nbott Wimg 81 DEWKS far outnumber DENKS as the typical young family Employed No are childless working couples and media attention has ballyhooed them and their almost identical the wave of the future (DINKS stands for Double Income No Kids) But a new Census Bureau report reveals that the great growth over the past decade has been in DEWKS (pronounced Employed With Kids We're just glad there's something besides Yuppies Sex is out Well sort of It has been replaced by romance at least according to indications from the advertising television and movie industries It isn't that people's habits are changing because of the AIDS crisis so much as the aging of the baby boomers In 1989 baby boomers will be hitting their 40s in record numbers and most of them are married or too old for the singles-bar scene Hollywood and Madison Avenue are answering this change with a new emphasis on traditional romantic images flirting and subtlety We can't wait for that subtlety Worst Perscud Ad Worst A high school in sweltering south Florida seta precedent this week by ordering boys to take off their miniskirts and put on their pants As record heat cloaked the Miami area this week North Miami Beach High School's air-conditioning system broke down The school prohibits boys from wearing not skirts "It was a way to remain cool" said Brad Meltzer 18 student body president who wore his girlfriend's blue cheer-leading skirt "They looked good" said Cori Ham 17 "They wore the skirts tight" "We have a policy about dress and that was not normal dress" the school's assistant principal Frank Johnson told a reporter "In class they tried to sit a5 ladylike as they could But that's not possible if you haven't practiced over the years" a reporter --in class mey men to sit a5 ladylike as they could But that's not possible if you haven't practiced over the years" From Vegetarian Times: From Ve Worst Medical News Ing0004113000? 1JA4W 4Y 604 qv FAR weifim FR 140 low 0 SW WAN 110494 q6141 Ent Local Elcatn tcina From The New York Times: From The New York Times: From the New York Daily News: YUPPIE DISEASE as defined by the Annals ofinternalMedicine has these chronic fatigue symptoms A patient must show eight of the 11 1 Mild fever 2 Sore throat 3 Painful lymph nodes 4 General muscle weakness 5 Muscle aches 6 Headaches 7 Painful joints 8 Sleep problems 9 Sudden onset of the condition 10 Confusion or forgetfulness 11 Fatigue lasting at least 24 hours after moderate exercise He left out No six-figure income by age 30 Now that's tiring UPPIE DISEASE as defined by the Annals of Internal Medicine has these ironic fatigue symptoms A patient show eight of the IL 1 Mild fever 2 Sore throat 3 Painful lymph nodes 4 General muscle weakness Muscle aches 6 Headaches 8 Sleep problems 7 Painful joints 9 Sudden onset of the condition Confusion or forgetfulness 1 Fatigue lasting at least 24 hours after moderate exercise te left out No six-figure in- ome by age 30 Now that's tiring Cvst ierni Sanford Sherizen computer security specialist on TV's Night line: llhere are more computers in the world than people if you count all the chips" It's time for chip planned parenthood Uri Minct irci From the book Harper's Index: percentage of teenagers who say the world is "getting 45 But it's getting better for them it would be getting worse for the rest of us Any macho vegetarian linguists oza there? pfLiii1 maim Etsbure The new president of the Student Government Association at the University of Maryland at College Park isn't a president at all He's a king James Risner or "King James" as he prefers to be called by his 28000 undergraduate subjects ran as the Monarchist Party candidate and was elected by 54 percent of the vote in a runoff election to head the student government The Monarchist Party also holds a majority in the University Legislature Mr Risner's first official act was to commission a cost analysis for accomplishing his No I campaign promise: building a castle behind the main library and a moat full of beer around the campus There would also be refrigeration units and a patrol submarine "We figure college should be fun" said Risner "It's possible to be competent and fun and that's what we're doing" he new president of the Student Gov- emment Association at the Univerlust sity of Maryland at College Park isn't a Any machovegetarianlinguists out there? I president at all He's a king James Risner or "King James" as he 1 prefers to be called by his 28000 un- 1 dergraduate subjects ran as the Monarch5 ist Party candidate and was elected by I I 1 1 54 percent of the vote in a runoff elec- I 0 tion to head the student government The Monarchist Party also holds a ma- 1 jority in the University Legislature a Mr Risner's first official act was to commission a cost analysis for accom- t1 plishing his No 1 campaign promise: -At 1 i i building a castle behind the main li- i brat)' and a moat full of beer around the 1 campus There would also be refrigera- tion units and a patrol submarine "We figure college should be fun" said Risner "It's possible to be competent iirand fun and that's what we're doing" retrgt Etuntt3 Comonol Etlermtre 1: rill ier1 oi computer security say the Sanford Sherizen teenagers wh Percen iage 45 is "getting worse" worl hem ns in the Ihere are more COrnter all it's getting better for specialist on TV'scrigh world than people 1 Yo the chips" It's time for chip planned lot fwuos would be getting worse for the rest lanned parenthood East Literary Dote literary Dote Norman Mailer in New Woman: 4orman Mailer in New Woman: 'LI llovels are like don't litalk about them But movies are like mistresses and you can brag a bit" lovels are like don't talk about them But movies are like mistresses and you can brag a bit" Ent Itzttal 1:1: James Kabb ler III chairman of Nlidcal tut Itzttcal Fames Kabbler Ill chairman of Nildcal Industries Ltd in New Woman: Industries Ltd in New Woman: From the Associated Press: The newly elected president of the Student Union at the University of East Anglia in who received 194 more votes than his nearest a gerbil We know how much fun gerbils are but is this one competent? From the Associated Press: dent Union at the University of East Anglia in who received 194 more votes than his nearest corn- a gerbil The newly elected president of the Stu- We know how much fun gerbils are but is this one corn etent? 'II ll i 'Heaven is an American salary a liChinese cook an English house and a Japanese wife Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary an English cook a Japanese house and an American wife" Chinese cook an English house eaven is an American salary a and a Japanese wife Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary an English cook a Japanese house and an American wife" ME PAGE 6 JANUARY 1 1989 PARADEMAGAZINE DAM' el 111111101f I 10110 DaDaric linkftW71111.