The Kansas City Kansan from Kansas City, Kansas • Page 4

Youil have to fight us, THE KANSAS CITY KANSAN. 0ST FA OY Readiness-ToSorve Ghafgb a Live Topic WEATHER FORECAST. Partly cloudy tonight and Sunday; slightly warmer tonight. Closing out entire stock of cost Crocheted baby Crocheted baby shoes and bootees Crocheted wool baby Baby blankets Baby stockings Handkerchiefs Doilees Centers Runners Boudoir caps Pillow cases Towels Fancy aprons Ribbons and stamped goods at cost. thread 11c; 5c; Clarks thread 2 for 15c.

The readiness-to-serve charge, according to Samuel S. Wjrer, gas expert, who read a paper on the subject recently before the Nat ural Gas Association of America, is a form of minimum charge made to cover the costs incurred by a public utility in holding itself in constant readiness to render service, without, however, delivtr ing any units of service. The actual units of service delivered; that Is B. t. u's contained in gas, kilowatt-hours of electric energy or gallons of water; are paid for at an additional low rate when fixed of expense are covered by a readiness-to-serve charge.

The readiness-to-serve charge has been made primarily in electric utilities. However, this practice is applicable to all public utility rate schedules: CARRIE GOTTESBUREN, I didn't listen to him So he's coming after me With a million Yankee soldiers From the land of Liberty, Now thats' why I called you, Satan For I want, advice from you, I knew that" you would tell me Just what I ought to do." "My dear old kaiser Wilhelm, There's nothing much to tell, For the Yanks will make it hotter Than I can for you in hell. I've been a mean oldTdevil, But not half so mean as you And the minute that you get here I will bid my job adieu. Ill be ready for your coming And 111 keep the fires I'll have your room all ready When the Yanks begin to fight. For the boys in khakill get you; I have nothing more to tell, Hang up your 'phone and get your hat And meet here in hell." Exchange.

Buy S- REAL ESTATE. Harriet V. Hammond to Dimitrly Parhomik, part lot 1, 2, block 20, Riverview, $700. Robert A. Patterson to C.

W. Green lot 6, block 38, Armourdale, $1. Margaret Hallisey to A. E. Smith, E.

19 ft. lot W. 12 ft. lot 6, block 8, Rockaway, $750. Alice A.

Chandler to W. Mosher, part 1 to 4, block 3, Forest Grove, $1,000. 5 C. L. Whitfield to P.

H. Bittlinger, lot 14, E. 1-2, lot 15, block 122, Armourdale, $1200. Nona B. Lotz to George H.

Lotz, lot 21, 22, block 7, Rosedale Park, $200. Maggie E. Uhl to E. R. Arney, lot 10, block 9, Fowler Park, $1.

Eric Swanstrom to Andrew Johnson, lot 5, 6 block 8, Chelsea, $1. Sheriff Wyandotte County, Kansas, to D. Ellison Park, $13. County Clerk Wyandotte County, to J. Morgan, lot 7 (N.

block 21, Bonner Springs, $2.40. John Waldron to Marilda Reed, lot 2, block 3, Piper, $50. K. C. N.

W. R. R. Co. to Marilda Reed, lot 1, cor.

3 and 9, block 8, Piper, $140. Frank G. Percival to Marilda Reed, lot 8, block 8, Piper, $575. Nellie M. to Manville P.

Teed, lot 9, block 1, Welsh's sub. $825. George W. McGrew to August Anderson, lot 1, block 8, Parkwood, $500. OFFICIAL CITY PAPER Corner Sixth and Ann KANSAS CITY KANSAS Published Daily Except Sunday Both Phone Weat 914 SUBSCRIPTION.

By carrier, week. By mail, six months. By mail, year THE KAISER CALLS UP SATAN. The kaiser called the devil up On the telephone one day; The girl at central listened to All they had to say, "Hello," she heard the kaiser's voice, "Is old man Satan home, Just tell him it is Kaiser Bill That wants him on der 'phone." The devil said "Hello" to Bill, And Bill said "How are you? I'm running here a hell on earth, So tell me what to do." "What can I do?" the devil said, My dear old Kaiser Bill? If there's a thing that I can do To help you sure I will." The kaiser said "Now listen, On earth a modern hell I've saved for this for many years And I've started out to kill, That it will be a modern job, You leave to Kaiser Bill, My army went through Belgium Shooting women and children down; We tore up all her country And blew up every town. My Zepps dropped bombs on cities, Killing both old and young, And those the Zeppelins didn't get Were taken out and hung.

I started out for Paris, With the aid of poisonous gas, The Belgians, dam 'em stopped us And would not let us pass. My submarines are devils, Why you should see them fight They go sneaking through the sea And blow up ships at night, I was running things to suit me Till a year or so ago When a man called Woodrow Wilson Wrote me to go a little slow. He said to me 'Dear William, We don't want to make" you sore, So be sure to tell your U-boats To sink our ships no more. We have told you for the last time, So dear Bill it's up to you, And if you do not stop it For Primary Nominations August 6. REPUBLICAN beautiful hand made fancy work at 75c to $2.50 to $1.00 to $2.50 and $1.00 20c 20c to $1.00 25c to $1.50 20c to $7.50 $1.00 to $7.50 25c to $1.50 $1.50 to $8.00 pr.

-Qc to $2.50 to $1.50 Ladies Exchange Sixth and Barnett lot 5, 6, .7, 8, block 1, Boulevard Lawrence Morgan to Mike Mikisech, Heights, $540. -Buy'W Proposal Without Words. If a young man in Holland Is In love, and wishes to propose to a young lady, the custom still prevails In several provinces of the would-be bridegroom buying a small, sweet cake and, wrapping It up in soft paper when he proceeds to the house of his inamorata. Upon his arrival he is ushered into the midst of the family circle. Without a word he walks up to the young woman he wishes to make his wife, and he lays the cake on the table before her.

If she accepts his nffer, she takes up the cake and -eats it Repair Mirrors. To renew the silvering on the back of a mirror lay it face downward on a smooth surface and prepare a piece of tinfoil large enough to patch the damaged part by rubbing it with mercury. Place the patch in position, lay a- sheet of paper over It, and put on It a weight having a perfectly flat surface and heavy enough to press It down tightly. Let the mirror lie in this position for a day or two and the foil will adhere to the glass. "Goat" of the Sea.

The codfish has the reputation of be ing the goat of the sea. It will eat anything, and there are many records of Its having performed some marvel feats of swallowing. CONGRESSMAN Second Kansas District JUDGE U. S. GUYER PUBLIC ADMINISTRATOR EARLE R.

GILBERT Practicing Attorney. Five Years Court MARSHAL NORTH CITY COURT (First District) J. W. HARTMAN SECOND TERM COUNTY TREASURER H. E.

PATTERSON The Man Who Can Do the Work Himself. FOR REGISTER OF DEEDS G. GATES Candidate for Reelection One Good Term Deserves Another. CLYDE C. GLANDON Candidate for COUNTY ATTORNEY FOR COUNTY COMMISSIONER SAMUEL CLARKE Second District, First, Second and Third Wards PROBATE JUDGE JOHN T.

SIMS The Kids' Friend Candidate for Reelection. I i i l4 I Sheriff Wyandotte County, Kansas, to F. R. Howe, lot 4950, 51, 52, block 85, Wyandotte City, lot 26, 29, 30, block 103, Wyandotte $106. Richard J.

Taylor to Claud C. Kes-ter, W. 37 ft. lot 5, block 3, Rockingham place, $1. Shepherd Township County to Mary Dickson, lot 26, 27, block 2, Leland Place, $450.

George A. Johnson to Bessie L. Johnson, N. 40 ft. L.

3, B. 9, Reynolds, Grandview Park, $1. Real Estate Investment Company to Ella Fosmire, lot 13, block 4, First addition, Western Highlands, $2,350. Union Loan and Land to S. W.

Natl. Bank Commerce, lot 1 to 6, block 3, Wyandotte City, $1. Sheriff Wyandotte County, Kansas, to W. H. Routh, lots in Rockaway, Schoormakers Days addn.

Simmons and McGeehards and Meyers addn. $55. Meyer Bros. Drug Co. to Otto G.

Maurer, lot 31, block 7, Armourdale, $1. Frank Erwin Gdn. to M. C. Hen-drickson, lot 63, Maple Leaf Lots Addition, $1.

John F. Kengott to May K. Fouche, South 12 ft. lot 6, all L. 7, B.

4, Ivendale, $1. John W. Dunlap to Sarah M. Dun-lap, part lot 1, Klamms Sub. $1.

NOTICE TO NATURAL GAS CONSUMERS. KANSAS NATURAL GAS CO. CLERK CITY COURT (First District) HUGH L. SCHONE A Member of Organized Labor CORONER DR. JEFF W.

HAYWARD Reference: My past record wfcilt holding the office. i i JUDGE OF CITY COURT (First District) HARLEIGH BENSON Has no brothers to practice befora him if elected SHERIFF DANIEL (BOB) MAHER Member of International Association of Fire Fighters, City Fireman's Union No. 64. COUNTY ASSESSOR R. D.

BARKER W. J. WRIGHT Candidate far SHERIFF CHAS. H. RIDGWAY Candidate for the LegUUtnre Seventh District You are not experimenting by Voting R.

J. McFARLAND CLERK DISTRICT COURT CLERK OF THE DISTRICT CQVtXt N. J. WOLLARD PLAY SAFE OrdorYour Goal Nov. ALL GRADES OF HARD AND SOFT GOAL Cordwood, Corn Cot and Kindling Wood Correct Weight and the Right Price Matthews Goal Company Seventh and Virginia tee Rcti Shop.

Bell W. 518 ntcte W. 21 Cotton Is Ancient. Jut who dUcortrod cottcur ts est known. The earl aro so la-complete that no Individual can credited with the filscoTtry of the rtX ue of this wonderful plant.

Lcnj before Caexara tlrae, among the IHzitr the had a law that if you atolt a tltc of cottoa 703 Catd thra Czzzj Its Talua. tha carl futtci) wtro faalilar with cottcaO Cl1ss5 peoIj cs'sd eYal3fc3 'w; DEMOCRATIC The courts have decreed void and enjoined all natural gas rates fixed by statute, Commission orders and City ordinances because unreasonably low, confiscatory and an interference with interstate commerce. This decree governs all parties unless and until reversed by the United States Supreme Court. The Courts also hold that when rates fixed by rate-making bodies are decreed to be confiscatory, illegal or void, the public utility is free to put into effect increased rates. When the natural gas rates were enjoined the Kansas Natural Receiver established the 60-cent joint-rate.

The distributing companies objected to this rate because it was too low to' restrict the demand for gas to the available supply which is sufficient only for cooking and lighting and if thus restricted would be sufficient to give good service and also because inadequate to afford a return to the distributing companies. The trial of this rate has demonstrated that it is entirely too low to accomplish either of these results. The distributing com-, panies are now confronted with' the necessity of increasing rates to restrict' the demand to the supply essential to improve the service and to afford them some return, but are precluded from applying to the Commissions because the business is decreed to be interstate commerce, free from state control. It follows that the distributing companies are compelled to put into effect increased rates without the action of the Commissions. The Chamber of Commerce of Kansas City, Missouri, after six months' in ves-N tigation have overwhelmingly voted in favor of an 80-cent gas rate plus a -50-cent per month per "meter service-charge designed to limit consumption I to the available supply, improve the service and afford a return to the util- ities.

While the utilities consider this rate too low to accomplish the purposes, they are willing to put it into effect for a trial period. THIS IS THEREFORE TO-NOTIFY ALL NATURAL GAS CON-1 SUMERS in Kansas City and Rosedale that the price of gas will be 80 cents net per thousand cubic feet plus 50 cents net per meter per month service-charge plus 10 per centum additional on delinquent bills, for all gas delivered on and after the regular meter-readings which will be taken from July 28th to August 28th, inclusive, 1918. Dated this 5th day of July, 1918. THE WYANDOTTE COUNTY-GAS COMPANY, By W. H.

McKENZIE, Gen. Mgr. Note: The same rates are being put into effect by the distributing companies in Atchison, Leavenworth, Kansas City, Lawrence, Tppeka, Oakland and other cities and towns. CORONER DR. CLEMENT WILLIAMS Institute of Anatomy Sanitary Science.

Home Phona West 461 CARS WASHED AND POLISHED 909 North Seventh St. TOM JONES Cars Greased Private Driving BARGAIN LUMBER AND SALVAGE GO. Tenth and Minnesota Avenue New and Used Lumber Doors, Windows and Builders' Hardware All Kinds of Rubber Roofing -r" Both, Phones West.