The Miami Herald from Miami, Florida • 119

WEDNESDAY MARCH 24 1993 THE MIAMI HERALD 5E Despite flashy efforts talky Turtles not as funny the third time around MOVIE REVIEW Instead annoying At a Sunday afternoon showing the audience made up mostly of the under-10 set rarely laughed coming to life only when the kung-fu took over The movie takes an excessively long time to cover short narrative ground and the plot is muddled enough to confuse the target audience The ancient Asian setting and costumes are effectively rendered and while the Turtles themselves look more rubbery than ever they retain separate distinct personalities if their banter were wittier be fun to watch too But in the end none of this matters As long as the popularity as toysrcomic books video games and TV cartoons remains strong these movies cannot fail If Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III follows in the profitable tracks of its predecessors you can bet be back for a fourth By RENE RODRIGUEZ Herald Staff Writer Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles HI is certainly the flashiest most ambitious and most expensive installment in the ongoing saga of the pizza-loving crime-fighting reptiles also as far as simple fun goes the weakest chapter in a series that despite huge box-office success was never an entertainment bonanza to begin with Not that the filmmakers tried to make this the best Turtles yet In Part III writer-director Stuart Gillard sends the Turtles back in time to 17th Century Japan so they can rescue reporter friend April (Paige Turco) who accidentally zapped herself into the past with a mysterious scepter she picked up at the flea market Once in Japan the Turtles become involved in a battle between the evil Lord Norinaga (Sab Shimono) and the noble Princess Mitsu (Vivian Wu) 4- TIME TRAVELERS: Donatello Raphael and Leonardo examine the magic scepter that can return them to the present from 17th Century Japan in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III Record contract? come singer says TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES III (PG) WW Cast: Elias Koteas Paige Turco Stuart Wilson Sab Shimono Vivian Wu Director: Stuart Gillard Producers: Thomas Gray Kim Dawson David Chan Screenwriter: Stuart Gillard Cinematographer: David Gurfinkel Music: John Du Prez A New Line release Running time: 96 minutes Violence Playing at: area theater When April and Mitsu are kidnapped by henchman Captain Walker (Stuart Wilson) the Turtles mount an attack on fortress Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III is surprisingly talky and the incessant wisecracks (incorporating everything from Arnold Schwarzenegger to Wayne and Garth) seem as amusing the third time around: 1 i JSl! THEATER REVIEW FORTINBRAS Cast: Leslie McMillan-Perez Scott Wiechelt Primo Tosi Fredrlc Ross Michael Sellard Jarrod DiMarco Matthew Gabriel Andy Reich Stephanie McNeil Karen Bailes Brigette Morrison Lon Ward Abrams Marti Montgomery Alex Duarte Playwright: Lee Blessing-Director: Carole Ries Scenic Artist: Karen Kelly Costume Design: Sari Berlin At the New River Repertory The Studio 640 Andrews Ave Fort Lauderdale: performances 8 pm Friday-Saturday 2 pm Sunday: through April 1 1 $8 763-6901 Hamlet who is trapped within a television set spouting out hysterical directives Fortinbras certainly presents fertile ground for satire and its plot weaves sufficient intricacy to allow for much raucous humor But the play widens its scope to include moral sermonizing about ethics politics and the meaning of mortality becoming ponderous The New River cast is simply unable to generate the snap crackle and plain raw energy called for by the story Too many laughs are smothered in Carol pause-filled prosaic staging and the performances to be kind are strained Michael Sellard as the frivolous Fortinbras is amusing and convincing but never completely engaging Fortinbras has a certain marginal buoyancy and a lot of its chicanery is funny but a lot more of it wears on the nerves resulting more in ennui than AFTER HAMLET: Primo Tosi left stars as Horatio and Michael Sellard as Fortinbras in this satirical sequel to Hamlet Fortinbras picks up where Hamlet ended New River presents Lee Blessing play mmm ill Remember that third night that was added to scheduled stop at Sunrise Musical Theatre? Well two things: First of all no longer on April 4 April 3 instead Second if you already have tickets forget it That show like the two that came before it has sold out Parents just understand the Fresh Prince joked once upon a time And indeed they Parents often ask me to recommend books that would educate them on the rap phenomenon Well while never been a shortage of seri afternoon at the Gwen Margolis Amphitheatre 16501 NE 16th Ave North Miami Beach the latest stop on a long journey that she says has taken her to stages across the southeastern United States The ultimate stop she thinkshopesprays will be signing on the dotted line with one of the major labels In the meantime complain for the simple fact that everything wanted to do doing I do this for a living and I get paid for it I get paid to have fun to converse with people and meet new people What more could I want? for that record she adds quickly I do believe everything happens in time Followed calling come been her mantra for as long as she can recall The thing that saw her through and made her stay the course when her folks kept trying to talk common sense to her Her father she says kept telling her as a teenager that she needed to get a real job come she said He told her she needed medical insurance and a dental plan come she said Her father told her she needed higher education and was less than thrilled when she turned down a college scholarship come she said father always said need to have a Plan A-Z You keep stuck on was always music Tyson says a fact her folks found hard to accept support me in that because I really did put all my eggs in one my parents were bom in she explains feels like been in this she says without complaint if somebody ever comes up to me and says Valerie Tyson the overnight sensation I know what gonna do And this is just the tip of the iceberg what done I'm sure that going to get even harder as it progresses But I'm willing to do that I'm willing to take that chance is what I she continues one thing that bothers me about some entertainers or actors or whatever When they get to a certain level all of a sudden like they want to know the people anymore they want to take the time to sign the autographs These are the people who make you have the luxuries So why change? I know hard work But either you want to do it or you Valerie Tyson wants it all right Wants it so bad given up a boyfriend or two who handle taking second place to her ambition But all be all right in the end she says have the marriage have the kids have the major label deal have the hits come come (Thank you Publix deli thank you Eckerd photo counter thank you PACE thank you Jesus) come Leonard Pitts column appears on Wednesdays fcHS MARCO POLO RESORT HOTEL CASUAL AND INFORMAL ON THE OCEAN AT 19201 COLLINS AVE SUNNY ISLES MIAMI BEACH FL 33160 1 Par Person Per 1 1 I 9 Day DDl Oceup Ilf I 75 Ol 550 Rooms 1 Excluding holidays (nM weekends "thiWAIKIKIH0NT ON THE OCEAN AT 18S01 COLLINS AVE SUNNY ISLES MIAMI BEACH FL 33160 t44 11 I Day Double' Occupancy 50 of 350 Rooms Excluding holidays weekend ffinnir y-l'i a -y se it! 1 1 Jl vFei? 3 JTTi -i Ti ltd ous studies of rap the need for a good basic primer has gone largely unmet But now People magazine writer Michael Small has put out Break It Down a book designed more for browsing than reading featuring interviews with most of royalty everyone from hard-core badboys like NWA to angry Afrocentrics like Public Enemy to easygoing pop rappers like the Fresh Prince The book published by Citadel Press retails for $1695 and about as painless a rap primer as likely to get mother went to the Uth grade my father went to the sixth or seventh grade They wanted us to have the opportunities My father used to say have all these opportunities Take them sit around and wait for things to come to Dreams will come true As a child she dreamed of making it to Broadway or the opera stage really where my heart was for the longest time Then I started listening to pop music Gladys Knight to this day is a true inspiration I heard Chaka Khan do Once You Get Started and I was like i want to sing like been singing professionally since the day she performed in a Holiday Inn lounge in Miramar at age 1 6 Been saying that mantra all those years too: come come just keep my patience I keep my prayer Most of all I keep my feet on the ground FREECIRCUS SHOWS BHhtaiMwidiliSMB INDOOR CENTERS' 11 GLEASON THEATRE BEST SEATS Call 445-3712 BALLET GALA WITH STARS OF BOLSHOI KIEV AND TIBLISI LA TIMES SAYS THIS SUN MAR 28th AT 7:30 PM A i -Rj i 1 I PITTS FROM IE I want to time the delay but I have a calendar handy Later in person more of the same: Thank you Miami Herald for doing a story on me You're welcome Oh thank you Miami Herald for doing a story on me welcome No really thank you Miami Herald for Valerie? Yes Shut up She laughs heard that one before guitar player he jokes and says I thank people all the she says like to thank the people in the Publix deli and Bui just me When I get something good appreciative a very grateful Well you might be justified in asking at this point what is it so all-fired thankful for Is this surfeit of gratitude the result of a multimillion-dollar record deal? A vault full of Grammys? A No 1 hit? Nah none of the above just happy to be alive and singing for a living Just happy And if you think to yourself well kind of small potatoes against the Grammy or the record deal well all a matter of perspective Valerie 31 says that thanks to her singing she had to work a day job the last 1 2 years thank you Jesus I know what it feels like to get up in the morning and go to work In that right there blessed A lot of people say that they actually make money doing what they love to These days Valerie does what she loves to do as an ambassador of PACE (the Performing Arts for Community and Education) the folks made it their mission to give a leg up to aspiring local players particularly in the jazz and fields through their annual showcase competitions Such past winners as George Tandy and Nestor Torres received backing from PACE that included bookings public relations services and help in polishing their presentations reign actually began with a showcase victory last June but a certain nasty storm that blew through these parts in August took a big bite out of the program PACE had lined up for her busy now making up for lost time with a schedule that includes a free show at 3 Sunday fR) AtiBtSCM WOMCCO BAY HARBOR 4 96 ST OF COUMS 866-2441 ANCTMUTWe OMN1 10 Cawi-N-EWi'CStAL 358-2304 MXTMOUt WOMCTCO 163RD ST TRIPLE 163 ST SHOP CTR 945-3518 HOLLTWOOO WOMETCO FLORIDA 4 HOLLT WCC MAU 967-9350 wo co KEN0AU9 3-Vc CTQ6 598-5000 WOWETCO MIAMI LAKES 10 ATMA-N41UOUM 558-3810 (OSTHW4M MVCS "HfciTt CALIFORNIA CLUBS sscvtSDAtRvaO wm c- asi 552-85 UNTTD MOVIES AT PEMBROKE 1I35C pines 3lvD 435-3700 lEJEWECMEMAG nnsi iwt 529-6863 "A By GEORGE CAPEWELL Special to The Herald Fortinbras is a wonderful idea for a comedy but the production at Fort New River Repertory Company fulfill its potential Playwright Lee breezy energetic satire is essentially a sequel to Hamlet commencing with the dying young anointing the rather sim-pleminded young Norwegian prince Fortinbras as his successor to the Danish throne lines quickly give way to modern American colloquialisms as the loutish abrasive Fortinbras attempts to enhance his power by concocting a story about a Polish spy being responsible for the recent carnage in the royal court A man devoid of ethics Fortinbras is convinced the people are more likely to accept his convoluted tale of intrigue than the true stoi7 with its ghosts insanity suicide and multiple murders Playwright revisionism and irreverence toward the Bard really gets cooking with the appearance of several ghosts who want the disheveled young monarch to tell the truth about their place in history First to arrive is Polonius who speak at all because he now realizes he talked too much in life and nobody took his advice anyway Eager to make up for lost opportunity Ophelia makes her presence known by seducing the easily distracted Fortinbras with randy abandonment Bouncing uncontrollably between lust and remorse Claudius and Gertrude join the never-ending intrigues along with a characteristically indecisive WICKEDLY ENTERTAINING SUSPENSE THRILLER" VincOTt Cm TNI NUN TWK TIMU MICHAEL DOUGLAS FAtLINGIDOWN PL1ASC CXCCX WOVIf CLOCK TIWCS ALSO AT OSTIWATJf JtfA FOX FCSVAL COKAI AiCCC FOUWTA9 CmCWA C-XCMA HtSSCfc BAT MOtftf A L-Ajpf SHU -MABOSH -TOW CT VMA 8 rLCT eCWMNO VtuuAOX 0 (YOOC iWVmUW Huinco-S CORAL VftwOS COBB W15T0N OtlAAT fa COM SOTHTdfc ffrc feyff AT AwAftai MOffiAl MAflCH XT3L MwnMV'i 1 AM ThtATMS COCOWALK 30 5 GRAND VE COCONUT GOV 448-6641 AMC rxtA StS MALL OF THE AMERICAS 14 PALrrowi3i 266-6646 AMC THtATStJ OCEANWALK 10 0CE4NWJCJI MAU HCUWCCD 3LVO AtA 9204330 XTP WOMCTCO MILLER SQUARE! 13608 SW 56TH ST 387-3494 AWCTHIATMB MARINAS 18741 BSCAVNE BLVO 931-2873 SOUTH 3ACC wourco UNIVERSITY? SWiOavECPPFW 223-2700 QINCRAlOIh HIALEAH CINEMA nsi3wTii'ana 557-9888 COAAwOAiUSS RIVIERA CINEMA US: 57 AVE 3 MIMA 666-8513 ihEtIA 10 'ji MIRACLE CENTER 1 COftAu WAV 442-2299 mm AMC THEATRES WOMETCOS WOMCTCO THEATRES WOMETWS MARIKA BYROHCARLVIE7 KENOAUS KILTER SOU ARE 1S741 BISCAYNE S00-71ST STREET KENDALL DR MLLERRDA BLVD MAM BEACH WEST OE FL TURNPIKE SW 137TH AVE S31-2B7S SMM23 SSS-SOCO 387-3404 AMC THEATRES OHM 0 OHM WTERNATtONM S6S-2304 THEATRES WALKS iJps GRATA) AVE AT MAIN 4 LUDLAM PALMETTO X-WAY SS0-M1O miFof THE AMERICAS The Miami Herald Wake Up to Whats Going On For home delivery please call 1-800-441-0444 ceCRALOettS UNTOOARTBTS THEATRES PEMBROKE MOVIES AT OCEAN WALK 10 PNES8 HIALEAH 333 HAflPSSON ST 780 WEST ST HOUVWOOO fiEAtt 429-7242 920-9330 GENERAL CMEHAS AMC THEATRES CINEMA 10 BAKERY CENTRE AT MIRACLE CENTER US 1 AT RED ROAD 3301 CORAL WAY (57TH AVE) 442-2290 042-4041 WOMETCO'S UHVERSfTY 7 SW107THAVL OPPBU 223-2700 WOtfETCaS HOLLYWOOD 987-9350 LOEWS CINEMA 4 PEMBROKE PMES 432-522S AMC COCO XlS Ato in Broward at Coral 1 0 Mowaa RantatoA Swiubb Coal Spnga Morioa Mar gala Fox Faafrrai Hewn Towneansar Mmmti Bar Thundortwd Surtiaa Watch the Academy Awards March 29.