News-Pilot from San Pedro, California • 10

A10 The News-Pilot Friday September 22 1989 BUD Sitcoms push all the wrong buttons I 1 Z1 Pa I wv kAV-P flo'f 5Mi! By Bob Wisehart McCLATCHY NEWS SERVICE With most bad television shows I usually mutter something about why does this show exist? and then forget about it Family Matters" airing at 8:30 tonight on Channel 2 is special This is not just a bad television show This is a show that had me asking the question Why does TV exist? Some smart person at ABC decided that Har-riette Winslow (JoMarie Payton-France) the elevator operator of Perfect Strangers deserved her own series This of course is just what television needs a spinoff built around a character no one cared about in the first place Watch Family Matters and youll wind up caring even less than that Here we are in Sitcomville USA Harriettes husband Carl (Reginald VelJohnson of Die Hard) is a tremendously fat Chicago cop Also living in their home is Harriettes widowed sister who is a would-be novelist and her baby Carl and Harriette also have three kids of their own Carl is excited to learn that Harriette has discovered a few extra square feet of uninhabited space and promptly invited his mother to come live with them too He spends the rest of the show wearing a vaguely stricken look It could be that hes emoting but my guess is that either he wishes he was back with the friendly terrorists on Die Hard or he has gas If Family Matters doesnt get you maybe Baywatch will I like lifeguards If Im ever drowning I hope a lifeguard is somewhere nearby Even when Im not drowning without lifeguards Id have to find someone else to envy But a television series about lifeguards? I can see the description now In the first episode lifeguard Biff slathers sunscreen No 21 on lifeguard Cyndy In next weeks show Cyndy slathers back Actually Baywatch (8 tonight Channel 4) is touted as serious stuff which now that I think about it makes it a lot funnier than Family Matters already You can decide for yourself when it premieres tonight on NBC starring David Hasselhoff Parker Stevenson Shawn Weatherly and several JoMarie Payton-France second from right and "Family Matters Below David Hasselhoff Reginald VelJohnson third from right star in left and Parker Stevenson in Baywatch NEW SERIES REVIEWS Free Spirit Channel 7 9:30 pm: This season the networks rash of bad comedies which lack either socially redeeming attributes or funny lines has spread to Sunday night with the new comedy Free Spirit The series is previewed tonight but will air regularly at 8 pm Sunday right before another new bland half-hour titled Homeroom Free Spirit is reminiscent of The Sound of Music Bewitched (1964-72) I Dream of Jeannie 1965-70) and yes 1987s I Married Dora" As in Dora a hard-working divorced father Thomas Harper (Franc Luz) is the head of a family with three lovable children His youngest child lonely Gene (Edan Gross) wishes for a friend and thats when Winnie the good witch Goodwin (Corinne Bohrer) appears (Insight is her claim to fame witchcraft is her game) She insinuates herself into the Harper family and is soon loved by Harpers three children Gene Jessie (Alyson Hannigan) and Robb (Paul Scherrer) The children know of her special powers Harper does not and hiding her abilities from him is central to the comedy The message is its OK to be sneaky around your parents to protect a witch Tonight Winnie attempts to teach Gene how to bowl She gets in trouble with Genes father when a bowling ball rolls out of control and destroys a piece of furniture in the living room Sound funny? Wait until you hear the roars of canned laughter when the ball hits the hutch in the Harper home and it falls over in slow motion Why does ABC keep rolling out these below-average comedies? Youngsters it seems approve of the shows They enjoy watching child stars parade around in the latest junior fashions Thats the appeal of Full House Just the Ten of Us and most likely Free Spirit" that will not lift any adults spirits Parents beware Snoops Channel 2 8 pm: Hes a professor of criminology at Georgetown University shes a protocol officer for the State Department and they bicker kiss and make up and oh incidentally solve crimes Thats the new CBS series starring real-life husband and wife Tim and Daphne Maxwell Reid as Chance and Micki Dennis a Washington couple whose curiosity gets them involved in solving crimes John Karlen who played Harvey Lacey in Cagney Lacey also is a regular as a police lieutenant In the opening episode Lt Stan Akers (Karlen) pays a visit to Chances seminar to hear his students discuss crime cases they have studied A boy genius in the class provides a clue to an unsolved murder and the hunt is on The case involves a man serving time for insider trading and before its all over a beautiful blonde has almost killed Mickey an attempt is made to run down the boy genius and Chance is horrified at how much his wife paid for the Italian designer suit she bought him The Reids are an attractive couple who obviously are having fun with their roles and the result is a light bright romantic show that really does hark back to Hart to Hart Faye Zuckerman Dallas Channel 2 9 pm: When last you saw the folks on this soap opera conniving JR Ewing (Larry Hagman) was raging over Sue Ellens (Linda Gray) tell-all film about JRs sleazy exploits The summer hasnt cooled his anger in the 13th-season-premiere Getting even with his hostile ex-wife is not all JR has to worry about these days He and Bobby (Patrick Duffy) must come up with a plan to secure Weststars oil leases Cliff Barnes (Ken Kercheval) continues his search for the elusive Afton Cooper (Audrey Landers) Meanwhile everyone in town is wondering about Tommy McKay (George Kennedy) who returns to Dallas with a new look and other people who look good in bathing suits Hasselhoff last seen talking to a car in Knightrider is the senior lifeguard In fact he is so senior that he gets to wear regular clothes Joining him on the beach beat are Stevenson who once solved crimes as one of The Hardy Boys playing this one is my favorite a successful attorney who moonlights as a lifeguard You might want to read that again in case you didnt believe your eyeballs the first time I know that lifeguards do more than catch rays and ogle bikinis this first show has to do with reckless jet skiers the swine but that doesnt mean the world needs a television series about them TONIGHTS PROGRAMS CABLE AND PAY TV MOVIES Johnny Apollo (1940) AMC 8 pm: Tyrone Power plays a good guy who becomes a crook because he is resentful of his father (Edward Arnold) who is a white-collar thief Excellent acting with Dorothy Lamour doing a good job as his girlfriend Dog Day Afternoon Channel 13 8 pm: This is a great movie with a stupid plot: A1 Pacino plays a loser who tries to rob a bank to pay for his male lovers sex-change operation Its based on a true story believe it or not Pacino is great as is Sidney Lumets direction Nasty Boys (1989) Channel 4 9 pm: This movie starring Jeff Kaake and Benjamin Bratt is supposedly based on a crack police team in Las Vegas thats become known as the nasty boys because of its effective crackdown on drug dealers The show is stupid too hard to follow and too violent And the actors are nothing to write home about Lets hope that NBC does not decide to make this a series Don Lechman TALK SHOWS Tonight Channel 4 11:30 pm: Guest host Jay Leno Sammy Davis Jr Paul Reiser (My Two Dads) Mykel Williamson (Midnight Caller) 1 Pat Sajak Channel 2 11:30 pm: Joanna Kerns (Growing Pains) singer Stephanie Mills and Don Herbert (Mr Wizard) Late Night With David Letterman Channel 4 12:30 am: Connie Chung and singer Melissa Ethridge TV HIGHLIGHTS (Advertisement) 8 00 PM Meet a curious couple Ck who can always catch the crooks in SNOOPS 9 00 PM DALLAS 2-hour Season Cb Premiere Tonight! 8 00 PM it's always summer Cb with BAYWATCH-SERIES PREMIERE! cv 9 00 PM World Premiere Movie! Cb The Nasty Boys are cops fighting drugs! tc -KS -cv.