St. Louis Globe-Democrat from St. Louis, Missouri • 43

the SOCIETY Women's News uuuouij'LLiULijyy Jetnacrat THE BETTER HALF by Bob Barnes SECTION PAGES 1 TO 8 FRIDAY, DECEMBER 25, 1959 A SEARCH FOR A DEFINITION medical of heart are A airs 1 "Gee I didn't know outboard motors came in such small boxes! mental and physical therapy: phlebotomy "opening the Liv-, er Veine in the fright and diet-water instead of lean meats, cooling foods like broth, salad, purslane, sorrel, endive, succory, and; lettuce (an excellent weight-reducing regimen in modern terms), i Prescribed, too, was earnest much labor, hard fare and lodging, and stratagems to turn the lover's deranged mind from his beloved, or to transform his emotion to hatred and disgust. If lovesickness had progressed to the stage of melancholy, leaving the victim cold and dry, weak, subject to physical debilities and mental vagaries, his illness was treated as a separate medical problem called In modern times, "The physical symptoms of a person who falls in love are characteristic Out of the Lyons Den By LEONARD LYONS The late Mayor Fiorello La Guardia, now the subject of a hit musical, once urged the police to distinguish between juvenile delinquency and boyish pranks. He said that when he was aiboy he and his friends would walk along the streets until they spied a horse hitched to a post "We'd unhitch the horse, ride around the town and then we'd return the animal." Onej cop asked: "Are you telling us that the Mayor of New York jwas once a horse thief "No," said Fiorello, VI'm telling that I once was a boy." i Oil's Poils Family Pine j. tit rv SSMaWMMSMSMMMMMWWBSfeM The angel looks a trifle beat, Some decorations obsolete; It's getting more and more to be a man's world. Why, now you'll even find them taking I But, nonetheless, they sa; to me: i This is our home, this is; our over at washing dishes.

Earl Wilson. tree. Elinor K. Rose. DONA ISABEL URCUYO DE SOMOZA Busy First Lady of Nicaragua 1 Today's Chuckle FIRST LADY OF NICARAGUA A smart girl is one who can lie convincingly enough to make fir.

1 II the well adjusted grow in honesty in their relationship." a man believe he's as smart as he thinks he is. Daffynitions I Conviction: A prejudice you can explain without getting angry. to the whole city This is the last in a series of five reports on a search for a definition of love in terms of modern understand-. ing and modern life, By BETTY REEF Women's News Service. NEW; YORK (WNS) Though everyone, especially a lover, thinks himself qualified to pontificate: on love, the physician is probably the world's best authority I on the subject, says Felix Marti-Ibanez, M.D., prominent medical historian.

"We physicians come most into contact with the problems and the consequences of the tender passion," he declared. Cradle to grave, the physician is present at nearly every serious, crisis of human life. The physician must treat the depression of bereavement when loved ones die. He must also find relief and, when possible, cure for all the physical dis-, orders which love frustrations give rise to in humans. "Love," in Dr.

Marti-Iba-; nez's definition, "is a bal-: ance between physical and mental-emotional factors. It is born suddenly and lasts forever. It is a motion of the soul towards something in- comparable. It starts with a centripetal stimulus aroused by another person. When this strikes the core, love blossoms centrifugally until it becomes a psychic current flowing endlessly towards' that person.

It's a curious fact that in scores of scientific works on marriage, the family, or sex, the term love is not even in- dexed!" he observed. EDITS MAGAZINE As publisher and editor-in-chief of "MD," a magazine which relates the arts and humanities to the practice of medicine, Dr. Marti-Ibanez has devoted two issues to the connection between matters medical and affairs of the heart. I In spite of our "distorted heritage of Freud," love is not the same as sexual instinct, this doctor reasons. 1 "Love Is-born from another being whose quali- ties trigger the erotic process.

Sexual instinct; however, pre- exists the object of desire and insures only the continuation of the species not its improvement. Love is always selective, excluding all desired i objects but the one. Sexual instinct is only sometimes selective. "Without sexual instinct, on the other hand, there is no love. But in true love, it merely serves the same purpose as the wind in sailing," said the doc-; tor.

He speaks in a soft Spanish accent. An admirer of Ortega Gasset, he gives this Spanish philosopher's definition of love as "surrender by bewitchment." "This makes it different from desire, which entails no surrender, only the capture of the quarry. In desire the object of desire is absorbed. In love the lover himself is Experience: Something you always think you have until you get more of it. i I Flattery: Telling another person precisely what he thinks of himself.

i Spinsterhood: Living in no man's land. I Conscience: Something that gets a lot of the credit that belongs to cold feet. GINGER by Gettermann i but physiologically inexplicable. The senses become sharpened, the circulation is quickened, muscular! tonus appears to be increased. The sensation of lovers ion air is a musculoskeletal change reported at all times and in many different countries.

"One! common; symptom is that lovers suddenly develop a profound benevolence towards other people. Everyone in the environment appears more friendly, more worthy. Petty "jealousies are forgotten, new virtues are discovered in old companions. The old. adage that all the world loves a lover could equally be turned as 'a lover loves all the An endocrine explanation for' this phenomenon has not yet been produced.

1 "Whatever the physiology, every physician who is in contact with common psychosomatic ills knows that the i frustrated desire to love and be loved Is a potent source of psychic disturbances. Dryden might note that to core the pains of love no plant avails; and his own physic the physician but all tha so-called torments of lev are far less dangerous than the bleakness, of a loveless life." UNEQUAL POWER Yet the power to love is not possessed equally by everyone, according to Dr. Marti-Ibanez. "Love is the most delicate reflection; of a person's soul," he declared, adding that as man's supreme esthetic experience, love in; its essence may never be fully understood. "Love is a monogamous emotional rebellion against the polygamy of i the sexual he said.

"But love is not marriage. Man contracts matrimony but is bewitched by love, impelled by the yearning to be- close to the beloved, to embark on a spiritual pilgrinv age into the loved one, to merge into one with her." The physician I pointed out that the erotic reserves in mar absorbed. Desire dies with fulfillment. Love is never fully satisfied," he said. He pointed to the many studies which show that the element of sexual arousal plays only a secondary role in love.

Empiric, observation has also revealed that the enjoyment of sex relations tends to improve as love grows stronger. Drop Defenses. As was reported in "MD," a healthy aspect of rwell adjusted lovers is that they grow in honesty in their relationship and drop the defenses which are part of every person's protection I against the outside world. I The partners feel accepted. Though psychologically and physically naked, they still feel loved and wanted and secure.

Nobody knows when the man-woman relationship acquired a name and an abstract quality, "MD" explained. "But cer- tainly, long before the notion of love' emerged into consciousness, the biologic basis for permanent attraction between male and female existed." "MD" said the remotest origins of love might be found In the tendency of all particles of matter to establish an integrative relationship. We have records at least 3000 years old of love's effect on sickness and health. On a tablet, an ancient Egyptian recorded an illness which his physicians could not cure," but for which woman's affection brought relief. The patient cut in stone: "Better for me is my beloved employes who work in the.

pal- ace- "l- Festive celebrations begin early in December and continue through January. She attends as many as two or three meetings a day. She and her entire family, including aunts, uncles and cousins, attend midnight Mass on Christmas Eve. And, in Nicaraguan tradition, everyone sits down' to dinner in the church after. JJie service.

When the meal is finished the presents, which Senora Somoza began gathering in August, ara opened. I With only one or two hours sleep behind her, Dona Somoza arises on Christmas Day and, with hundreds of toys purchased in the United States, makes a-tour of orphanages and children's wards in the hospitals. Besides attending to her children, the First Lady plana meals, entertains three or four times a week, works for charity, heads various committees and attends receptions, dinners and political meetings alone or with the President. the press of official duties sometimes makes me feel i that I don't have nearly, enough time for" my children, there are, wonderful corhpensa- tions," she said. "One of these is being able to help so many other children." 1 than any "When I see her, then I am welL "When she opens her eyes, my limbs are young again.

''When she speaks, I am strong; "And when I embrace her, she banishes evil, "And it passes from me for seven days." From time to time in medical annals, passion has been regarded as an illness. Renaissance "physiks" actually thought of love as a medical problem. They listed it as "brain sickness," along with madness, hydrophobia, and frenzjr. They recorded that the ailment abounded in the great houses and princes' courts, where idlers lived at ease and "could not tell otherwise how to pass their time." Love was believed to enter; the body through the eyes. From there it passed through the veins-into the liver, there suddenly to "imprint a burning desire to obtaine the thing, which is or seemeth worthie to bee beloved, setteth concupiscence on fire the man is quite undone and cast away, the sences are wandring reason is confounded, the imagination corrupted, the talke fond and senceless." Love was a hot passion which kept its victims uncomfortably warm "rosted by a soft fire." Or at other stages thp flames of passion could scorch the "inwards and marrowes (of those that entertain it into their bosome." AUTOPSIES OF LOVESICK i One physician wrote that he had seen autopsies of some who died of love, "their bowels shrunke, their poore heart all burned, their Liver and Lightes all vaded and consumed, their Braines Endomaged." The ony cure was to let the sufferers have their When this was impossible, the good "Physition" provided both MANAGUA (WNS).

Think you're busy at Christmas? Then give a thought to Dona Isabel Urcuyo de Somoza, wife of President Xuis Somoza. She has seven children, the oldest 12. She does her- own gift shopping for six boys and a girl. The presents she buys are supposed to be delivered to them Christmas Eve by' "Nino Dios." Translated literally, it means the "Child God." Translated freely, it means the Nica-raguan Santa Claus. Sesora Somoea must also in-' elude gifts: for her 15 servants and presents for government Word Game TODAY'S WORD WRESTLE (Wrestle: RES'l.

To contend, grapple.) -I Average mark 26 words. Time limit 23 minutes. Can you find 30. or more dicr tionary words 'in The list will be published to- morrow. RULES OF THE GAME: 1.

Words must be of, four, or more letters 2.: Words which 1 acquire four letters by the addi-; tion of such as "bats," are not used. 3. Only one form of a word is used. 4. Proper names are not used.

Yesterday's Word TRANSIT tarn traits astir star taints rants saint start tarts rani satin Stain tarsi rains sari strain tints riant strait stir titan anti X- stair stint trains artist "See? I told you I could play 'Reveille'!" Etiquette or so in advance, should; she hear from him again before the specified day? A. This would be the cour- teous i and thoughtful thing for him to do in order to javoid any possibility cf misunder standing. Q. My husband and have1 been invited to a double wedding ceremony. The one couple Is very good friends, but the other we Jcnow only slightly.

Are we obligated to send gifts to both couples? A. A gift to your good friends is the only requirement. Of course, a little gift to the other bride would not be improper, but it isn't expected. Q. When a young man has I asked jl girl for a date a month Ben Burroughs1 Sketches WHAT CHRISTMAS MEANS riage need continual renewal, or love 'ends in sexual boredom or shady polygamy." The man and wife who cultivate the erotization of marriage and the spiritualization of sex, who learn to play the game fairly and with delicacy, "can together (prepare for themselves a magnificent feast at the table of life." I END Soap in drain If small pieces of soap have worked themselves down into the drain, pour down some boil- ing water to melt and wash them away.

Soap will not clean waste pipes; use washing soda for that purpose, as soap will clog the pipes. Christmas is the holy day when Christ was born in Q. When entering a friend's new home or is it proper for me to ask to see all of it? A. This suggestion should always; come from your host or hostess. Q.

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