Altoona Tribune from Altoona, Pennsylvania • Page 14

FOURTEEN ALTOONA TRIBUNE, SATURDAY MORNING, JUNE 28, 1919. ALTOONA CAPTAINS GETTING BACK HOME, Capt. Bruce W. Bell Now in Camp Grant- Capt. James Taylor at Home in Altoona Captain Bruce W.

Bell, son of Mr. and Mrs. Lincoln S. Bell of 1910 Twelfth avenue, arrived in New York on June 9. He came from Germany, via Brest, where he had been serving since the signing of the armistice with Occupation.

"From New York he was sent west to Camp Grant, Rockford, with a detachment of soldiers for demobilization. He expects to secure his discharge in time to be at home, to participate in the celebration July 4th and 5th. Captain Bell enlisted at Allentown dn June, 1917. He entered the officers' training camp and upon completion o1 the course obtained the commission of first lieutenant prior to going overseas. He is attached the officers' headquarters of the Sixth division in the U.

S. regulars. Captain James S. Taylor, of 924 Twenty-fourth street has arrived at this home in this city. He landed at Newport News last Friday and received his honorable discharge at Camp Dix, N.

J. Captain Taylor attended the Carrell-Dakin Institute 'in New York city and served further in the Walter Reed hospital at. Washington, D. before going overseas, at that time being promoted to the rank of captain. He served in France about ten months a as a member of the personnel of officers of Base Hospital No.

64. Eyerly, of Baltimore, member of the Nineteenth Engineers, attended the banquet of that organization held in Jaffa temple on Thursday evening. James P. Finnigan, of 2104 Eighth avenue, returned to his home in this city on Tuesday. He served in France B.6 a member of the U.

S. signal corps attached to the transportation service. His service in France lacked two days of being a year. RECENT WEDDINGS Mentzer-Herbster. At the Lutheran parsonage at Lovett, Cambria county, by the pastor, Rev.

W. W. Frey, Mr. Clifford Eugene Mentzer, of Piney Creek, and Miss May Herbster, of Beaver Springs, Snyder county, were united In marriage on Thursday afternoon. The young people left Martinsburg by auto and will enjoy their honeymoon trip in that way.

The groom is a telegraph operator and is the oldest son of Mr. and Mrs. A. L. Mentzer.

His bride has also many friends in this region and congratulations will be numerous. Simmons--Smouse, Mr. Oscar H. Simmons, of Johnstown, at 3 o'clock Thursday afternoon claimed as his bride Miss Wilda Elvira Smouse, youngest daughter of Mrs. Mary Smouse, of Martinsburg.

The ceremony was performed by Rev. J. I. Hall, at the First Brethren parsonage. Mr.

and Mrs. Simmons left where they will home to their immediately by auto, for Johnstown, friends after August 1. A host of good wishes went with them. Add Weddings Moreth-Heater. Mr.

John Moreth and Miss Welthy Heater, of Lakemont, were married yesterday in the Church of God parBonage by the Rev. Cyrus S. Nonemaker of Lakemont. Only the immediate relatives of the contracting parties witnessed the ceremony. Following the wedding the bridal party went to their newly furnished home near Lakemont park, where a sumptuous wedding supper was served.

The bridegroom is employed as tile setter by the Altoona Marble and Tile company. The bride Is an esteemed lady of Lakemont, The couple will reside at Lakemont. Hollabaugh-Kinley. Mr. John M.

Hollabaugh, of 1515 Second street, this city, and Miss Eleanor E. Kinley, of 409 Fifth avenue, Juniata, were married at the home of the bride at noon on Thursday by Rev. T. S. Dickson, pastor of the Juniata Presbyterian church.

Members of the immediate families of the witnessed the ceremony. couple, of Juniata, acted as best man, while Miss Alda Simmons, 01 Pittsburg, a cousin of the bride, served as bridesmaid. Following the mony the young couple left for a wedding trip to the east. Upon their return they will make their home at 1515 Second street, Altoona. The bride Is popular young lady of Juniata and B.

daughter of Charles T. Kinley. Mr. Hollabaugh is' an employee of the Pennsy passenger station in this city. Everhart-Trostle.

Mr. Eugene Everhart and Miss Florence Trostle, both of Warriorsmark, were united in the holy bonds of matrimony at noon yesterday in the Lutheran church at that place by Rev. E. J. Lloyd, pastor of the Presbyterian church.

The ceremony was witnessed by relatives and friends of the contracting parties and the attendants were Miss Ellen Trostle, a sister of the bride, as maid of honor while Mr. Leon Cox acted as best man. There were also four bridesmaids, two flower girls and four ushers. After the cerenony a wedding dinner was served at be home of the bride. The couple later departed on a honeymoon trip and on their return will take up their residence in Warriorsmark.

Marriage License Record. Russell Bare Garver, Roaring Spring, and Elizabeth Craig Beck, Altoona. Frank Fred Light, Snyder township. Blair county, and Margaret Ellen Gross, Tyrone. Richard Miles Chilcott, 216 Logan avenue, Llyswen, and Mary Margaret Cassidy, 1509 Fifteenth street.

Altoona. Charles Alexander Clare, 1918. Seventh avenue, and Mary Catharine Mc- Cormick, 819 First avenue, Altoona. Samuel W. Shultz, Altoona, and Louise S.

Sorge. Allegheny township, Blair county. DEATH RECORD BENJAMIN F. MULHOLLEM. Benjamin F.

Mulhollem, one of the oldest residents of Altoona, died at noon yesterday at his home, 913 Lexington avenue, of diseases Incident to advanced age. He had been confined to his residence for the last nine months. Mr. Mulhollem was born near Tipton, April 7, 1835. He engaged in the flour and feed business and followed that occupation for many years, until his retirement several years ago.

He served with Company Third Pennsylvania heavy artillery during the Civil war. The veteran was a Baptist by faith. His wife and these children: Mrs. Laura B. DeBray, Mrs.

Mabel F. Goodfellow and Mrs. Edna M. Cook, all of this city; Mrs. Mary M.

Fries, of Windber, and Frank W. Mulhollem, of Chicago, survive. Private funeral will be held tomor. afternoon at 2 p. at his late home, and private burial will take place Fairview cemetery.

The body may be viewed from 7.30 to 9 o'clock this evening. MRS. MARY CLARK Mrs. Mary Clark, who made her home with a son, Edward Clark, at 2520 Oak avenue, died at 12.55 o'clock yesterday morning at the Altoona hospital of heart disease after a short illness. She was admitted to the hos.

pital June was born at Mill Creek, August 1850. the She, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Reuben Lightner, and was of the Calvary Baptist humember Surviving are four sons and one daughter as follows: Mrs. Mart Bonard, of Albany, N.

Joseph, Edward, Robert and James, all of this city, also by four grandchildren and one sister, Mrs. Agnes Motter, of New Castle. The remains were removed to the home. 2520 Oak avenue, by Funeral Director N. A.

Stevens. The funeral will be held at 2 o'clock on Monday afternoon at the residence of her son, Rev. Dr. Feltwell in charge of the services. Interment will be made in Lutheran cemetery, at Hollidaysburg.

BURK Mrs. Celia Burk, widow of Louis R. Burk. died at the home of her father, John C. Lingenfelter, of East Freedom at 10.15 o'clock yesterday morning of a complication of diseases.

Mrs. Burk was aged 30 and was born and raised in East Freedom. She is survived by her father and three children, Mary, Melvin and Violet, and by two brothers and two sisters, Harold, Berkey, Ida and Clara Lingenfelter, all of East Freedom. The funeral will be held with services at Claysburg Reformed church at 10 o'clock Monday morning, followed by interment in the Claysburg ceme- tery. MILLARD HAINES Millard Haines, Mrs.

Jessie Haines, of 2817 Oak avenue, died at the Mercy hospital at 11.15 o'clock yesterday morning as the result of injuries received on Thursday, when was dragged by cow he had been leading. The lad suffered a fracture of the skull and internal injuries and never regained consciousness. The boy was born in this city 13 years ago, the son of Warren and Jessie Haines, the former deceased. He student at the Curtin public school and a member of St. Paul's Evangelical Lutheran church and Sunday school, He is survived by his mother and the following brothers and sisters: Frank and Leah, of Pittsburg; Harry, of Glen Mills; Mrs.

John Walls, of this city and Eugene at home. Deputy Coroner Chester C. Rothrock viewed the remains at the undertaking parlors of Hickey O'Neill and will give a decision in a few days. The funeral will be held from the family home tomorrow afternoon at 2 o'. clock.

Interment will be made in Rose Hill cemetery. MATHILDA W. DIEFENDORF Mathilda W. (nee Hancock), wife of William Diefendorf, died at 1.28 o'clock yesterday afternoon at Mercy hospital. Funeral and interment will strictly private.

Friends wishing to view the remains may do so this evening from 7 to 9 o'clock at the family residence, 2305 Eighth avenue. Please omit flowers. (Bedford county papers please copy.) NOTICE RED MEN All members of Chickalacamoose Tribe No. 364, I. O.

R. are requested to meet at Red Men's home on Sunday afternoon at 2 o'clock to attend the funeral of their late Brother E. V. Little. By order of Sachem H.

H. Hoffman, K. Geo. Musselman. BAIL FURNISHED TODAY.

Shopmates Will Go on Bond of Her. man Mummey on Murder Charge. Herman Mummey, of Juniata, and his cousin, Wilbur Gibson, of Danville, the two young men charged with the murder of Constable J. W. Norris, will be admitted to bail today as the result of habeas corpus proceedings institutled by their attorney, John F.

Sullivan. A delegation of Mummey's shopmates will go on his bail while Mrs. Mummey will become the bondsman for her nephew: Gibson. ARMY NURSE COMING HOME. Miss Naomi C'ority, daughter of Mr.

and Mrs. John brity, of 230 Lexing. ton avenue, will arrive at her home at 11 a. m. today, after having served for more than a year as an army nurse in France.

Miss Gority arrived in New York on last Friday on the U. S. S. Interator. GRADUATES AT CARNEGIE TECH Miss Marion Ruth Keefer, daughter of Mr.

and Mrs. J. H. Keefer. of Altoona, is a member of this year's gradnating of the Carnegie Institute of Technology.

While at Carnegie Miss Keefer followed the Household Economics Course and received the degree of Bachelor of Science at Commencement Exercises held June 27th. ITALIAN SOCIETY. CELEBRATE FEAST Crown of Italy Members Parade Last Evening -Will Have Fireworks Tonight The Crown of Italy society last night inaugurated a two day celebration of St. John's Day by holding a parade and with patriotic exercises at the hall. Ninth avenue and Eighth street.

It was an event of joyous pleasure and was marked by the honor paid to a number of returned Italian boys that served in the United States army and navy. The society's members assembled at the hall at 6 o'clock last evening and formed in line of parade as a guard of honor to some twenty automobiles that carried the returned service men. Headed by the society's band it moved to Eighth avenue and Ninth street where an unusual honor was paid Ernest Salvucci, the notary public at 911 Eighth avenue. The officers of the society entered his office, conferred the rank of honorary president upon him and presented him with a bouquet of flowers and then escorted him to a waiting automobile. The parade, ably marshaled by Louis Mangiacarne, paraded out Eighth avenue to Seventeenth street, to Bridge street.

to Eleventh avenue, to Eleventh street, to Green to Seventh street, to Eighth avenue to Eighth street to the hall. The yard in the rear of the hall was patriotically decorated with the national colors and a platform was erected at one end for the honored guests, speakers and the young women who represented the organization in the Red Cross and whose activities in raising funds for the Italian Red Cross brought a diploma from Italy in recognition of their service. wiSe Samuel introduced B. Hare, as the Esq, speaker of the of city, the evening. He spoke of Italy as one of the allies of the United States in the great world of their participation in the bitter strife, of their bravery and valor on the field of battle.

He complimented them on love and loyalty to America, for their liberality in the purchase of Liberty bonds and the gifts they made to the Red Cross and other war funds. He also praised the Italian lads that wore the American khaki and the Navy blue. He was followed by Ernest Salvucci who spoke of the love of the Italians adopted country, their love for their fellow countrymen overseas. He paid tribute to the Italian boys had answered the call to the colors and who served beneath the Stars and Stripes and the part they paid in crushing the Hun that aimed to establish an autocratic empire to rule the world. He paid compliment to the young women who sacrificed their time in laboring for tre Red Cross and concluded by admen ishing his countrymen that the deeds of the young men that served in the U.

S. army and navy was the emblem of a devotion that they now owed the land of their adoption. His address was in Italian and was translated by Angelo Santella, who is now a senior in the High school and who will become a student at law after graduation and is likely to become the first Italian lawyer in this vicinity. The exercises were punctuated with selections by the band and were followed by a for the members and their families. dance This morning 'the society members will attend high mass at Mt.

Carmel Catholic church and this evening after dark will enjoy a celebration of fireworks at one of the hills in the East End. The exhibition has already been ordered made ready for putting off and promises to be one that will be entertaining to the public. The following service men were honored guests of the society: Sergeant Antonio Passalalpi, Antonio Soriano, Guiseppe Colarusso, Luigi Cappucci, Donato Mollica, Henry Fiore, Rocco Martino, Francesco Pizzino, Ferrucci De Angelis, Giovanni Caputo, Santo Gualano, Domenico Parisi, Alfonso Sciarrillo, Guiseppe Policastro, Angelo Callista, Santo Ciccone, Guiseppe Appollonio, Giovanni Scacchetti, Luigi Terticaro, Frank Roberto, Gregorio Rubertazzi, Antonio and Patoli Danella, Domenico Forgi. Biagio Fusca, Rimigio Corsi, Zapito Casole, Antonio Liberatore, Rocco Luciano, Giovanni Spiridigliozzi, Michele Langanella, Saverio Guido, Francesco Muccitelli, Torchetti, Folcarelli, Michele Cerullo, Domenico D'Agostino, Sabatino Costantino, Carlo Ricci, Vincenzo Pulceni, Vincenzo D'Ippolito, Antonio Cencio, Michele Petta, Luigi Galassi, Francesco DiPietro, Luigi Mattioli, Antonio Rossi, Michele Di Biase. COWS AND PIGS MUST GO.

All cows and pigs now kept in the city by their owners, must be taken from within prior to July 1, the city health bureau has announced, to comply with the recent ordinances adopted to that effect. All owners should govern themselves accordingly and thus avoid prosecution. Newspaper articles earlier in the week stated the time limit expired on July 15, which was erroneous. WILL HELP IN PARADE. The 1 members of Zameri temple, Dramatic Order Knights of Khorassan, of the Altoona Knights of Pythias, will participate in the parade this evening in Hollidaysburg at the time of the dedication of the Victory arch.

Members of the order, in full uniform, wilt leave the local lodge rooms at 5:15 o'clock this afternoon. BARBER SHOP REMODELED. Paul E. Delozier, the well known tonsorial artist at 1726 Eleventh avenue, has completely remodeled his shop and installed the latest improved It is now one of the finest parlors in the city, modern and sanitary in every respect and is conductled on the union scale. He is in a position to cater to his trade without Inconvenience to them and invites others to inspect his shop.

Observe Wedding Anniversary, Mr. and Mrs. Alvin Bertine Meller, of 2712 Fifth avenue, on Thursday 00- served the twenty-fifth anniversary of their marriage. The day was quietly observed. A number of relatives of the couple visited them during the day and numerous friends called to offer felicitations.

Mr. and Mrs. Paul Me! ler, of Albany, N. the former a son of Mr. and Mrs.

A. B. Meller, will observe their second wedding anniver. sary today. -BUY W.

S. RED BOBS CROWDS WHEAT FRONTIER 100 MILES FARTHER NORTH A Fortune in Seed Wheat Red Bobs Note the Beardless Heads Wheeler Red Bobs wheat, a new variety and is expected to add millions of of straw which enables it to defy any wolved by Seager Wheeler, the wheat wizard of Canada, is expected to push the frontiers of the western Canadian wheat belt 100 miles farther north. Red Bobs seed has been widely distributed throughout the prairie provinces by the land ment United Grain Growers, the great co-operative farmers' organization, and will be given its first real test this year. Marquis wheat, which is generally grown throughout the Canadian West, was also the invention of Mr. Wheeler.

He evolved it from Red Fife. It was a heavier yielding wheat and ripened a week earlier. Marquis wheat carried the wheat area 100 miles farther north than Red Fife had ever grown. Red Bobs ripens a week earlier than Marquis acres to the wheat growing lands of Canada. Its early ripening quality renders it immune from any frost but those that may chance in some freak season.

It also renders it practically immune from black rust, that annual plague of the wheat fields. Rust makes its appearance in Canada in late July or early August. By this time, Red Bobs will be so near maturity as to escape damage. Red Bobs produced by Mr. Wheeler from carefully selected red-grained heads of White Bobs, an extremely early, beardless wheat dinarily of white grains.

White Bobs was the result of a cross between Australian white wheat and Nepaul barley. betted Bobs has not only a full round but remarkable strength WAXEY ON THE BAND MISTER in my green grocery I'm goin' to write you concerning' the feud what am ragin' between Hollidaysburg and Altoona what threatens to make the Hatfield-McCoy unpleasantness look like a love feast. And there aint been a word about it in the Altoona newspapers. When Jonathan Waxey holds a mass meetin' down his warehouse, them Hollidaysburg reporters am as dumb as Jefferson Slicker who lost his voice cheerin' when Grover Cleveland was elected. Jest wait till I start my WARWHOOP." Then you'll behold how news ought to be dished up.

In my mind's eye I kin see the circulation swellin' up like Pig. wiggin when he was elected to coun cil, and me huntin' bail. Mister Editor, gimme your ears. This is what started the fight. A couple of weeks ago when Altoona had that big reception for Company the Hollidaysburg Liberty, Band jest couldn't stay they polished up their horns until you could look in see if your hat was on straight, a started off and to git in the parade.

What was the result? The whole town knows, grits its teeth and sees blood when you mention it. Them Altoona parade managers refused to let our Band parade. They said it was a parade for Altoona only and they didn't want Hollidaysburg buttin' in. They wasn't toot a single toot. They jest had to stand on the sidewalk along with the ladies' and the baby buggies and listen to other bands playin' their favorite tunes.

They come right smack home. They marchdown to my establishment. I never seen men so hot and huffy. Aloysius McGinniss, a Irishman with hair as red as a Bolsheviki banner, never quit hammerin' his drum. They jest couldn't make him stop.

And Boney O'Doodle kept blowin' the base horn more like a fiend than gentleman. They said I must do somethin' quick, or they wouldn't be responsible for 'their actions. I stepped to the portans of my store and said calmly: "Gentlemen of the Band, I realize that you has been cruelly insulted. And anybody what insults the Liberty Band insults the whole town of Hollidaysburg, But hearken unto me. Jonathan Waxey throws a protectin' arm around you, and before many days Altoona will go down on her dirty, smoky knees and crave your pardon." And the Band went away playin' "There's a Good Time Comin'." An.

McGinniss and O'Doodle was workin' harder than ever. Mister Editor, I'm a man of action. I started to work as hard as Casey did when he got the contract for tear- in' down a Methodist Church. I hastened up to Pigwiggin's house. They said he had gone on a vacation.

He was tryin' to recover his health after bein' on the draft board. He was affected something' like shell shock. was awful put out. Also, suspicious. For Pigwiggin has a habit of fadin' away about the time he's needed on the jury at a murder trial.

It ain't generally known, but Pigwiggin is the man who hid in a coffin in a undertaker's establishment to git out of servin' on the Wendt jury. But jest went ahead and laid my plans Last Saturday Pigwiggin come back. He was considerable improved and said he felt strong enough to lick Jess Willard. I jest wish you could have heard him when I told him about our Band. He was awful to contemplate.

Why, Jesse James was a. cooin' dove compared to Pigwiggin when he has his dander up. He smacked his lips anticipatin' his revenge and then started right in to practice his speech. I sent my son, Woodrow Wilson, around with, a. hand bell and sum moned the people of Hollidaysburg to a monster mass meetin' to in my warehouse on Monday evenin'." I ain't a boastful man, but that was the grandest mass meetin' I ever had.

Count de Pompeydoodle remarked that it looked bigger to him than the Chicago Convention what nominated Roosevelt. And Ebenezer Tuckey said Billy Sunday would be awful jealous if he could see the size of that audience. There was a double ring of baby buggies around the square and it took three hours to demobilize that crowd. The Liberty Band was there in full uniform. As they marched down the aisle, a club of single ladies knowed as "The Unclaimed Blessins" pinned cabbage rose On the musicians' coats, jest over the lungs what helped to toot us on to victory.

As they came tootin' in, audience riz up and gave them the Chautauqua salute. The Reverend Jonah Nogood led in prayer. He prayed for the Band, and particularly hearers. Pigwiggin made the openin' address. I never seen him so eloquent.

He has a frothy, juicy style of oratory what is very popular. He never does much, but he is a awful handy man to have around when nothin' but talkin' is needed. He Jest breathed fire and fury. The applause was terrifying and every time he made a strong point, Aloysius McGinniss would hit the drum a awful whack. I had to act in the capacity of both chairman and reporter.

Here's jest a few of Pigwiggin's remarks: "It is well knowed to you that was a member of the Draft Board. Them months was like some long, bloody nightmare. I served in Coun- GEORGE WASHINGTON DID HIS BIT Col. Kemper Surprised by the Entry of Washington, Franklin, Adams and Jackson "I began to think I was being hypnotized," said Colonel J. B.

Kemper, the army recruiting officer for this district. "On Monday one of our sergeants announced 'George Washington to see Lieutenant On Tuesday he came in with Benjamin Franklin and John Quincy Adams to see Major Mahin; on Wednesday he ushered in another celebrity- none other than 'Andrew Jackson to see Colonel Kemper, And the strange part of it is that it was no joke. Washington is a colored barber in Steelton; Adams. Jackson and Franklin are Harrisburg colored men, and all were in to see me about claims for additional travel pay. On Thursday John L.

Sullivan came in to re-enlist, but was rejected for being under weight. On Friday John Marshal applied for re-enlistment." The colonel paused to chuckle a bit. "What do you think happened on Saturday?" asked the colonel. "Give it up," said the newspaper is impossible these days." "Well," continued the big chief recruiter, "on Saturday the sergeant solemnly geant Young' and in walked Patrick Henry, John Jay and Alexander announced 'committee from the continental congress to see First SerHamilton to claim their $60 bonus." but the most destructive hail storms. Seager Wheeler, internationally famous wheat grower, farms only a "selected" farm of 160 acres in the fine mixed farming country along the Canadian National line near Rosthern, Saskatchewan.

He has won five championships at international exhibitions with his wheat and holds the world's wheat producing record with eighty-two bushels to the acre. His first big prize was the $1,000 in gold offered at New York Land show in 1911 for the best bushel of wheat grown on the continent. His prize bushel was of Marquis bushels wheat to that the acre yielded and seventy weighed five sixty-two and a half pounds to the bushel, which was two and a halt pounds more than standard weight, cil durin' the passage of the Cow Ordinance; also, durin' the stormy sessions when the attempt made to change the names of the streets; and one of the judges at the Blair County Baby Show back in '87. But ain't never seen anything quite so mean as the job Uncle Sam handed me. Dost wonder, my hearers, that I'm tryin' to win health and strength back to my enfeebled frame? In them days nobody loved a draft board It seemed to me that I would soon have more enemies than the Kaiser.

Why, I didn't even dare go Roarin' Spring. They hated me so there. You can realize what a awful thing it was not to be allowed to go to Roarin' Spring. All Claysburg waited for me with a stuffed club. I wouldn't have dreamed of visitin' Williamsburg without the protection of the State Constabulary.

Storms or wrath bust over my head daily. I was all curled up like a pretzel dodgin' bricks the stern performhad lived in days of Napoleon ance of my solemn, duty. Why, if I Bonaparte, he would have regarded me by making me a Brigadier General, and I would be runnin' around bent double from tryin' to carry my medals. Fellow Townspeople, behold the wound on my marble brow. This was give to me by old Hiram Huckleberry when he came down from Newry and cleaned up the draft board for sendin' his boy away jest when the potato bugs needed attention.

(Tears and sighs from the audience.) When we sent the son of Mrs. Salome Kahooty away, she kept weepin' around the office until we all got the rheumatism. She said the honey bees missed him so. The missin' portion of my left ear am due to Mrs. Minerva Whizzey.

She had a boy with a wart on his nose. She contended that he couldn't be took because he couldn't see over that wart to shoot. She knowed he'd murder his captain by not aimin' straight. But the boy was took. Hence this damaged ear.

Supreme. Court was ever called upon the questions we had to wrestle with. But the courage of Phineas Pigwiggin never wavered from the time he was sworn into service till the joyful day he was dismissed and deloused. The life insurance company cancelled my policy. My wife pitied me so that she made a service flag with a whole rash of stars on it.

She hung it in the parlour window. She said any man what was passin' through what I was ought to have all them stars and then some. was truly the days what tried men's souls and through it all the only ones who stuck to me was me wife and THE LIBERTY BAND. Gentlemen, your band was one bright star in the night of my despair. When my heart was so heavy that I felt I had Chimney Rock in my buzzum, one blast from your horns and I girded on my armour anew, and sprang strengthened and refreshed into Uncle Sam's great man hunt.

Your band never deserted our board. By day you worked with your horns on your work benches and by night you slept with your horns on your pillows. You was indeed the musical minute men of our town. At our summons the cafe man forgot his milk stew, the druggist his liver pills the undertaker stopped decoratin' a corpse and rushed to the piccolo and the cornet. When the boys went away you played all the tunes you knowed and some what you didn't know.

Your martial music cheered the faintin' hearts of all, and put pep into the departin' draftee until went away feelin' he could lick his weight in wild cats. To hear you was to want to fight, You was fifty strong in the beginnin'. When the flu came along you dwindled down to four. But still you stood ready at a. minute's notice.

And as one by one a certain long, lean gentleman what always gits his pictures took in a blue spiked tail coat, striped trousers and a hat with a starry band, reached down and nabbed I you, another sprang up to take up the fallen drum and horn. At one time there was nothin' in your ranks ex them as had hammer toes and them ceptin' them as had 1 leaky hearts, as had twins. But you was faithful to the end. On that long-remembered night when the Pennsylvania Railroad caught the Crown Prince, We know how you marched the whole night through, played "The Star Spangled Banner" for mine, without stoppin' until you faintin' and weary at your horns in the cold, gray dawn of the early mornin'. And you gave your services free-free as we give good advice and git the measles.

No mercenary patriots was you, tootin' at so much per toot. And you never had a drive to raise money and nobody ever seen you runnin' around beggin' for money like missionary sassiety. Liberty Band of daysburg, stand up and git cheered. (Frightful applause like the roar of many guns.) "Gentlemen of the Band, it has came to our ears that you tuneful heroes has been refused a place in a Altoona parade. Our blood biles as the thought of the dastardly outrage.

We crave the privilege of defendin' you. Of course it's a well knowed fact that Altoona am jealous of because you am so talented and you uniforms am so And your war records jest makes them turn somersaults for envy. Altoona is as full of meanness as a pickle is full of warts and-" (Censored) Mister Editor, of course runnin' a print jest what Pigwiggin said. The Altoona newspaper you wouldn't de dare people got awful excited. Ebenezer Fop, so violent that we had to Tuckey send for Pillyking have him chloroformed.

He jest hates Altoona. He got a toot on out there last winter and they put him in lockup left him alone for a whole night with nothin' to amuse him but pink eared crocodiles and bears with callico tails. Mrs. Pansy McGinniss, who has two sons in the army and a busband in the band, completely lost control of herself. She had to be kickin' and screamin'.

That's carried the out first time the public ever knowed Pansy wore stockins. Pansy is aw. ful revengeful. Ever since the band was insulted she's 1 been prayin' for rain on the Fourth of July so Altoona can't have no parade. Bartimeus Bowser was carried away by Pigwiggin's remarks, and almost swallowed his cornet.

He had to be beat on the back before he could cough it up. Aloyslus McGinness stood on his chair once to cheer, lost his footin' and fell into his drum. The leader of the band was awful put out. Othello Beaney got so profane that had to tie his bandana handkerchief over his mouth. He hates Altoona.

because he, boots out there and they a pair of bought two years. He he wore only and is swears was cheated, awful sour on Altoona Altoona Pigwiggin to wound up by comparin' Germany, much credit of Germany. He ed the then requestbig audience to stand strafe Altoona. And that up and vast semblage riz up as one man and a strafin as broke sich down, forth. They sunk red and exhausted.

then The Ladies' Sympathetic Sassiety pledged themselves not to be present at any Altoona Bargain They also took a solemn oath Sales. not to purchase their paradin' slippers for the big demonstration burg in Hollidays. on Saturday night from shoe stores. Altoona Mister Editor, then I riz up. Iain't no spread eagle orator But when I like Pigwiggin.

titude opens my mouth the mullistens. I "Gentlemen of the Liberty band. on next Tuesday evenin' gin will escort you to Altoona. Pigwig. me and the stormy music of To also your drums will march delegates from all leadin' organizations the of the townThe Fat Man's League, Domino Club, Grape Complete Rest Sassiety, The Gaysport Juice Guzzlers, and then As we march down some.

Eleventh avenue, you will play a. stirrin' march posed by me entitled, Gee! Ain't This a Crooked Town." We will march straight to City hall and demand explanation and for your shameful insult. If apology a it is denied, Hollidaysburg will see that there is a few riderless steeds in Altoona's Fourth of July parade. And we want to state to you that when that rade, magnificent and stupendous paSaurday evenin', band what Al- on comes off in Hollidaysburg toona rejected is goin' to head of our column. You is heroes--not of the sword, but of the horn.

I'm a poet as well as a green grocer and from my bustin' heart I exclaim: Not feld of But You won the war by shootin', battle, jest by stayin' home The And Band keepin' was up your tootin', then ordered to stand up and the Ladies' Sympathetic siety pinned medals of honor on each one's buzzum. And they was also made the recipients of a. doughnut. Them medais was 80 big that little Eddie Seaso tz who plays the flute, tripped on his and fell and broke his collar bore Now, Mister Editor, please announce about our comin' to your city on this gruve and serious errand on Tuesday night. Have all the reporters in Altoona on the spot.

I ain't been Altoona for fifteen years. I hate your town with a great and consumin' hatred, and teel about as comfortable when I am over there as Carrie Nation in a beer garden. But when duty calls, and justice beckons, Jonathan Waxey is on the Job. The Health Of ficer promised to fumigate me free of charge when I return. It's a awful risk but for our Band's sake, I'll taixe it.

Yours, thirsting for Revenge, JONATHAN WAXEY. Hollidaysburg, Pa, June 26th, 1919. ALDERMANIC NOTES Dash Jury will be accorded a hear ing today by Alderman Gorsuch, Third ward, on a charge of assault and battery, preferred by Mrs. H. Eckard.

David Bookhamer and Dick Fowler were accorded a hearing before Alder man W. C. Crampsey, of the Second ward, last evening to answer to charges preferred by David Haddad, the proprietor of a confectionery store in the Eighth ward. He charged them with waylaying. him and assault and battery.

was discharged while Bookhamer was held in $200 bail for court. Amos Hugh Jones. alias Jack Hughes, a man under charge of big. amy in Cambria county, was before Alderman W. E.

Crampsey, yesterday to answer to the charge of false pretense, preferred by Mrs. Harriet M. Hamman, of Kansas, and who is the prosecutrix against him in Cambria county on the charge of bigamy. There was no evidence against the man and he was discharged..