The Record from Hackensack, New Jersey • 40

SL-2 THE RECORD ADVICE SATURDAY. JUNE 3. 1995 OvmTs i iw7 J. tf Top 10 rules for giving kids sound values Don't retreat if you put heat to his cold feet BIRTHDAYS: poet Allen Ginsberg, singer Deniece Williams, blues master Curtis Mayfield, dancer Josephine Baker. TODAY'S CHILDREN: Even as tots, these Gemini will appreciate a change of scenery.

A short trip to the grocery store or a nearby park will perk them right up. The fewer rules they have to follow, the better. They have considerable self-discipline and usually make smart choices. The teacher who takes a special interest in these bright students will be rewarded with devotion and a first-class performance. ANN LANDERS JEANE DIXON ABIGAIL VAN BUREN DEAR ANN LANDERS: As a public-school teacher and elementary principal for over 32 years, I have seen many parents who failed DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend (I will call him Jim) and I have been dating for six years.

We both agreed that after we graduated from Ambitious and faraighted, these Gemini seem destined for tremendous success. LETTING GO OF UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS will help you find greater success and happiness in the work place. Your ability to come through in a pinch will be noted by influential people. A promotion or special perks are featured. The financial picture brightens as 1996 gets under way.

A romantic relationship takes a substantial step toward fulfillment. Travel plans heighten the joy you feel. ARIES (March 21-Aprll 19) Stay calm if faced with a temporary financial crisis. People working behind the scenes may be able to tell what direction to take. Seek their advice.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) Take better care of yourself when working under pressure. Avoid making rash decisions in the event your judgment is off. Things are not as difficult as they seem. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) Close attention to detail is a necessity today. Put your cards on the table where finance or romance is concerned.

Outline your needs. CANCER (June 21-July 22) i Ideas that are out of the ordinary may be the ones to follow. Trust your hunches. Attending a family celebration could strengthen a romantic relationship. LEO (July 23-Aug.

22) Be of good cheer. Impromptu get-togethers are likely to be more fun than formal affairs. Differences of opinion can be discussed with constructive results. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept.

22) The signs say something wonderful is coming your way. Creative urges as well as romantic inclinations grow stronger. Loving touches mean everything to family members. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct.

22) Take all measures you deem necessary to keep your home and family together. Faraway relatives could get in touch, adding a bit of joy to the day. Keep a close eye on trends. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov.

21) Avoid acting impulsively when handling financial matters. A message from a relative could set your mind at ease. Count on an employment situation to improve soon. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec.

21) A good day to improve your base of operations or living quarters. Older family members may be feeling neglected. Be more attentive. Even a short visit is better than no visit. CAPRICORN (Dec.

22-Jan. 19) Welcome a chance to further your career interests while giving someone a helping hand. Let your mate or a close pal set the social pace tonight. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb.

18) Someone close to you may be moody today. Hold up your end of a bargain and everything should turn out fine. Visiting a special exhibit or store will boost your spirits. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) A financial mistake could prove costly.

Be sure you know what you are purchasing on sale. Hunting through second-hand stores could uncover wonderful bargains. 199S, UnhmMl Pnm Syndlcatt to realize how important it is to take an active role in their child's development. Recently, my 86-year-old mother passed away, and I found the attached clipping among her possessions. I have shared it with my school community and received many positive comments.

I thought you might want to share it with your readers. Sandra Shenklr, Bear Creek Elementary School, Houston DEAR SANDRA SHENKIR: Thank you for your thoughtfulness. The wisdom of Sam Levenson, who was a public-school teacher, is legendary. His Ten Commandments are well worth noting. I'm so pleased that you sent them on.

My personal favorites are Nos. 9 and 10. Levenson's Ten Commandments: 1. Thou shalt guard thy children in the home and on the street. 2.

Thou shalt make thy home a sanctuary of love and devotion. 3. Thou shalt honor the teachers of thy children and teach thy children to honor them. 4. Thou shalt net condone the faults of thy children through a misguided sense of loyalty.

5. Thou shalt teach thy children respect for the law and keep them from the companionship of children who indicate disrespect for law. 61 Thou shalt not lead thy children into temptation by providing them with the means thereof, to wit, too much money, a car, and adult privileges. 7. Thou shalt enforce decency in the dress of thy daughters and dignity in the dress of thy sons.

8. Thou shalt protect the morals of thy children from the indiscretions of youthful ardor and inexperience. 9. Thou shalt conduct thine own affairs in such a manner as to set an example worthy of imitation by thy children. 10.

Thou shalt not permit thy children to bear arms, except in the service of their country. DEAR ANN LANDERS: In June, my son will be marrying a lovely girl from a wonderful family. Her father is a surgeon, and her family seems used to having the very best of everything. My family is run-of-the-mill middle class. "Janet" is a lovely girl, and I am happy to welcome her to our family.

However, I was hurt by an incident that took place during the wedding shower. Janet's mother, who appears to be a very gracious woman, made a point of showing me the beautiful silk' suit she plans to wear to the wedding. She said it was traditional for the bride's and groom's mothers to compare dresses to make sure they don't select the same outfit. I have never heard of such a tradition. She knows I couldn't possibly afford such a suit.

I suspect she was telling me that I need to buy something up to her standards. Was it tacky of her to do this, or am I being overly sensitive? Feeling Scruffy In Seattle DEAR SEATTLE: Tacky? Not in the least. I believe you are overreacting to what you feel is a "class difference." It is indeed customary for the mothers in the wedding party to make certain their colors don't clash. Relax and have a wonderful time. Write to Ann Landers co The Record, 150 River Hackensack, N.J.

07601. 0 1995, Creators Syndicate Inc. college, we would get married. Well, that day has finally arrived, but now he acts like he is trying to back out. Jim just wants to give me an engagement ring and wait "a little longer." Abby, I feel that I've waited long enough.

Isn't six years long enough? Should I give him more time? Or tell him, "Now or Wanna be Married DEAR WANNA BE MARRIED: Six years may be long enough for you, but obviously it i3 not long enough for Jim. Whether you want to invest more time in him is a decision only you can make. However, I advise you to weigh the consequences before you decide to issue a "now or never" ultimatum. And be prepared to follow through if the answer is "never." DEAR ABBY: Forty years ago, a distant relative (I'll call her Sue) gave me a pair of matching end tables she had stored in her garage for a long time. I was newly married and had very little, so I was grateful for any furniture I was given.

A few weeks ago, I moved into a small condominium, so I sold all the furniture I couldn't use. Well, Sue knew that I was moving, so she called and asked me to return the end tables she had given me. I was shocked, and told her that I had sold them along with the other furniture I couldn't fit into my condo. Sue demanded to know who bought HER matching end tables so she could go and pick them up. Of course, I refused to tell her, so now she isn't speaking to me.

Who was wrong? P.O.'d In Palm Beach DEAR P.O.'D: Sue was wrong. Once something is given, it becomes the property of the person to whom it was given. DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend thinks it's great fun to pin me down and tickle me. I tell him how much, I hate it and that it's really a form of torture, but he dismisses my claims because I laugh when he does it. He says it can't be "torture" if I'm laughing.

Abby, how can I convince him that this is torture, and get him to stop? He's really a great guy except for this one habit. Sign me Tickled In Texas DEAR TICKLED: If your "great guy" insists on doing anything after you have asked him to stop, he is not as "great" as you think he is. Tell him that you will not tolerate any more tickling, and if he doesn't stop his thinly veiled sadism, I suggest you find another boyfriend. Write to Dear Abby co The Record, 150 River St. Hackensack, N.J.

07601. 0 1995. Universal PreM Syndicate HALL HIGHLIGHTS Bluegrass music on 'Opry' stage WHAT'S HOT 1 found in New Mexico. Saurischian; late Triassic; 200 million years old. Other features "Touch fossil" exhibits of a real dinosaur egg, horn, skull, and tooth.

Computer stations displaying time lines about dinosaurs from the Jurassic Period (205 million to 135 million years ago) and the Cretaceous Period (135 million to 65 million years ago), with sound and video illustrations. Also, time lines to explain ecosystems of each period with information on what dinosaurs ate and their habitats, features, and size. A giant evolutionary tree of Saurischian and Ornithischian dinosaurs. The Dinostore, with such items as dinosaur erasers, lunch boxes, models, posters, 150 illustrated books, and CD-ROM games and educational software. EVONNE COUTROS Tyrannosaurus rex: cleaned, conserved, and repositioned into a stalking pose.

Saurischian; late Cretaceous; 65 million years old. Apatosaurus: formerly the Brontosaurus. New skull, four additional neck bones, and a longer tail that is raised off the ground. Saurischian; late Jurassic; 140 million years old. Skeleton of an Edmontosaurus: called the "mummy" specimen because impressions of skin and other soft tissue remained in the Wyoming rock where it was found.

Or-nithischian; late Cretaceous; 65 million years old. Allosaurus fragilis: "Different reptile" and the most recognized carnosaur, the museum's exhibit shows the specimen feeding on the 'carcass of the apatosaurus. Saurischian; late Jurassic; 140 million years old. Coelophysis skeletons: juvenile bones of the Coelophysis Ohio Players The Cleveland-based Ohio Players perform at 9 tonight at-Club Bene, Route 35, Sayreville Some might remember the Players for such Seventies hits as "Fire" and "Skin Tight." (908) I'll van fl YJJY-auuu. (snow oniyj ana $30 (7 p.m.

dinner and show). Eclectic combo ftT-vrV inn Vi a a unimia ami I derived from guitar, saxo- nVtAtti irAialo an1 Vtooa flrtarAr 5' I TtrtfL i1 iBvm them out at 8:30 tonight at Irving' Plaza. 17 Irvine Place. Manhat if Banjos and guitars are among the instruments you'll hear when The Fox Hill Bluegrass Band takes the stage at 8 tonight at The Garden State Opry at the Villagers Theater, 475 DeMott Lane, Somerset. This New Jersey group has just released its first album, "Hard Times." $7.50 and $5 (children).

(908) 274-2748 or (908) 329-0504. Voices in harmony The a cappella ensemble Har-monytryx performs at 7 p.m. Sunday at the Watchung Arts Center, 18 Sterline Road, Watchung. $8. (908) 753-0190.

Folk and more See folk singer Richie Havens and Voices of the Folk at 8 tonight at The WllllamsMeadow-lands Center for the Arts, 1 Williams Plaza, Rutherford. The Voices perform African-American music. $12, $18.50, and $20. 939-2323. Freedy headlines 'This Perfect World" is Freedy Johnston's latest, and the singer-songwriter brings his mix of pop, folk, and country at 10 tonight to Maxwell's, 1039 Washington Hoboken.

$10. 798-4064. tan. $15. (212) 777-6817.

Box office, TicketMaster outlets, and TicketMaster Charge, 507-8900, nr (91 307-7171 i U.K. soul Two English singers, Seal and Des'ree, perform at 8 tonight at the Jones Beach Long Island. "Crazy" and "Prayer. il CI 1 tsm rna innrr am amnnir i CARMINE GALASSOSTAFF PHOTOGRAPHER The Museum of Natural History has updated its dinosaurs. popular tunes, while Des'ree's' "You Gotta Be" has become a radio hit.

$28.50. (516) 221-1000. Box office, TicketMaster outlets, and TicketMaster Charge, 507-8900 or (212) 307-7171. GABRIELA ENSER Dinosaurs and associate curator in the museum's department of vertebrate paleontology. It now stands 86 feet long.

"All these changes were done in the traditional style," added Norell. "You can't tell we made these modifications. We tried to retain some of the old grandeur of the original mount. "At the same time, the Tyrannosaurus really represents something completely different. With the T.

rex, we took it completely apart and reglued every piece and built an entirely new armature to look more like a bird." T. rex dinosaurs, said Norell, are very closely related to birds. The exhibits also include an extraordinary "mummy" fossil of the 9-foot-long Edmontosaurus, a duck-billed creature that lived 65 million years ago and was discovered in Wyoming. It died on its back, head twisted. Though it looks like it has skin, the well-preserved fossil bears only imprints; no skin was preserved.

With the museum's addition of "lifelines," or interactive computers, that decipher the dinosaurs' evolutionary tree, visitors may learn about the environment, eating habits, and size of each creature through videos. "Touch fossil" exhibits allow visitors to stroke a dinosaur egg, horn, skull, and tooth. A fascinat- FrontPage SL-1 mount of the Tyrannosaurus rex, or "tyrant reptile," a 40-foot, 5-ton carnivore that dates back 65 million years. Museum officials say research shows that T. rex, with its pointed teeth, stalked rather than stood upright, so the remounting includes a repositioning with head down, body parallel with the ground, and tail outstretched.

"This reflects a more modern insight of dinosaurs as agile, active creatures rather than sluggish swamp creatures," said Midhael Novacek, senior vice president and provost of the museum and curator in the department of vertebrate paleontology. The Apatosaurus, mounted in thelmuseum in 1905, greets visitors coming into the Saurischian Dinosaur Hall. In the 19th century, it was thought to be a different specimen from the Bronto-saurus, but the two were determined to be the same and the Brojntosaurus name was dropped because Apatosaurus was quoted first in scientific publications. Remounting the Apatosaurus, or "deceptive reptile," dating back to the late Jurassic period 140 million years ago, included the addition of four neck vertebrae a i 15-foot extension of the tailj; said Mark A. Norell, curator of Sthe Hall of Saurischian it cavated near Haddonfield.

The new exhibits follow the expeditions and research of such noted museum scientists as Barnum Brown, Roy Chapman Andrews, Walter Granger, George Olsen, and Edwin H. Colbert. "One of our goals in putting these halls together was to let people know that the museum is not simply a great place to come and see exhibits, but also that the scientific researchers that work here every day actively contribute information to this body of evolutionary evidence," said Dr. Lowell Dingus, director of the revamping project. Dingus closed the halls some three years ago for the massive redesign.

"It's important to realize that not only are these fossils real, not only are we presenting the story of evolutionary evidence, but we also want people to come to have fun," he said. The American Museum of Natural History is at Central Park West at 79th Street. (212) 769-5100. ing video explores the theories behind the demise of the dinosaurs from the possibility of a devastating volcanic eruption to an asteroid. The closest the exhibit comes to creating "moving" dinosaurs a la "Jurassic Park" is the use of educational robotics to demonstrate how dinosaurs chewed their food.

The museum has constructed cast skulls of a duckbilled Anatotitan and a horned Triceratops to demonstrate their evolutionary chewing techniques. The halls house the world's largest collection of dinosaur fossils. The 100 specimens represent 5 percent of the museum's collection of 2,000 dinosaur fossils. "In 1905, this museum unveiled one of the first complete dinosaur displays in the world, which attracted throngs of visitors and created a great sensation," said museum President Ellen V. Futter.

When the museum was founded in 1869, the first dinosaur in the country had been ex Here, you can get a look at exotic marine life and ecosystems. Information: (203) 536-3323. NEARBY: The Florence Gris-wold Museum in Old Lyme, an 1817 Georgian mansion, with a collection of American paintings dating from 1898. Information: (203) 434-5542. DINING: The Redbrook Inn, 2750 Goldstar Highway, Old Mystic; (203) 572-0349; or stop by on your way back west from Mystic at the Griswold Inn, 36 Main Essex; (203) 767-1776.

DIRECTIONS: Take Interstate 95 north, get off at Exit 90, and follow signs leading to Mys- -tic area. GABRIELA ENSER MYSTIC, CONN. Mystic Seaport has earned its reputation as one of Connecticut's major tourist attractions. All year long, it bustles with the activity of a re-created 19th century coastal New England village. Among the 60 buildings on the village streets, there's a school-house, bank, meeting house, and chapel.

Visitors can get a feel for maritime life in ship carvers' shops and a chandlery. For antique buffs, there's the Mystic River Antiques Market, where dealers sell collectibles, furniture, and artwork. The Mystic Marinelife Aquarium is a good place to take kids. jl.