Sunday Gazette-Mail from Charleston, West Virginia on June 30, 1974 · Page 130
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Sunday Gazette-Mail from Charleston, West Virginia · Page 130

Charleston, West Virginia
Issue Date:
Sunday, June 30, 1974
Page 130
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Page 130 article text (OCR)

FAVORITE jokes · mm ^^ EDfTOTS NOTS: "People"think I'm too po/»te, I'm a/ways saying I'm sorry! For this I can only sincerely apologize" jimmy Caesar says humbly while his smiling mouth and widened eyes react to his joke. Though still in his 3ffs, he began his show business career in vaudeville when he was 15 doing impressions of stars. Caesar has appeared frequently on the New Dick Van Dyke Show, on Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In, in clubs across the country, and has toured, w/t/i impressionist David Frye. No conflict there. When the two appeared at jimmy's 52nd Street Room, New York's new in-piace for satire, Frye did his political impressions, and Caesar backed him up with a change of mood, bringing back such greats as Stan Laurel, Walter Brennari, Al Jolson. It was at Jimmy's too, that Caesar rioted how careful, fellow comedians are about impressionists. "David had offered to buy Red Buttons and Pat Henry a drink, and Pat quickly said,'No you don't, David. You're liable to order in my voice, and I'll get stuck with the check.'" And, Rodney Dangerfield once said to David, "Don't raise your voices to me!" . . . . . . . . . As for jimmy, his voices may well have started as a protect/on as the 16th in a family of 17 children. "I'd perform wherever I could get on stage, because when I got home my brothers would say, 'Give us five minutes of humble!'" Here are some of ]immy Caesar's jokes and anecdotes: A fortune-teller I know just got fired. They caught her joining a nostalgia club. . . - . . . ' - ' . . ~~ . . . ..''"·.:·. ·, ' ·-, ' · ' · - . ·· , .·:· ..' . ' - -.' Since being in show business I've picked up all sorts of awards. One of my proudest is the award the National Safety Council gave me. They figured since I don't drive I saved over 60,000 lives in the last five years. - ' ' v ' - . ' ' · ; - ' · "-· . ' The school I went to was pretty much like other schools in that we got a day or two off once every month because of the teachers' meetings. They were taking lessons in self-defense. ... · -·. ' ' ':.. * ? - . . . A man bought a canary, took it home, discovered it only had one leg and returned it for a refund. The pet shop owner said, "What do you want, a singer or a dancer?" In Las Vegas a teacher was explaining to the class how to count money. Laying a silver dollar on her desk, she called upon a Jittle boy to identify what it was. 'Tails," he replied. by jiMMy CAESAR Schwab's drugstore in Hollywood is a very important place for actors to hang out,~ especially when business is bad. In a booth there one day, two actors were having a conversation. "How do you like that? In five months I've had two interviews, can you imagine, two interviews!" The second fellow says, "What are you complaining about? I've been here five years, and I haven't had a call from my agent. Oh, if only I could get out of this stinkin' business!" · Hello, this is Richard Nixon ... and I've got a secret. The Russians have stolen all of our nuclear secrets. Now they're 10 years behind! · When I was a kid growing up, I was one of 17 children and part of a poor family. We were so poor that we lived behind the ghetto. I remember one time when one of my brothers couldn't go to school for a few days. He was kidnapped. My dad had chronic insomnia, and he fell asleep reading the ransom notes. Of course, my mom read them in the morning and promptly rented out his room. There-were so many of us kids^--well, none of my brothers got to sleep alone until they were married. Now you dent need kJVover meat to make chicken,ham or turkey salad sandwiches. It's not often you have left-over chicken, ham or turkey on hand for sandwiches, so keep The Spreadables handy/Then you always have good, chunky chicken salad xready to spread. Or ham salad. Or turkey salad. With The Spreadables on hand, you can enjoy your favorite meat salad sandwiches any day of the week. And you'll enjoy a 15C savings, too, if you clip this coupon now for The Spreadables Meat Salad Sandwich Spreads from Carnation. ·* ! OFF row ON The Spreadables, MEAT SALAD SANDWICH SPREADS from (arnation T ° L 5^^ C ^^»^«!^.^^?^ 3C handtag) through Carnation OFF SI OFF , -- _ . _ -' r "** constidms baud. Invokes proving purchase of sufficient stock to cover coupons presented far redemption must be shown on request U*d If UK is prohttMd, taxed or ottwrwbe restrkxd by law. Litnt one coupon ptr tanity. Cash value V20 of 1C. Carradon Company Los Angeles. California/^ STORE COUPON The SpreadaNes" is Carnation Company's registered tradtmart ior its sandwich spreads. IS* OFF J73

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