Sunday Gazette-Mail from Charleston, West Virginia on September 3, 1972 · Page 15
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September 3, 1972

Sunday Gazette-Mail from Charleston, West Virginia · Page 15

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Charleston, West Virginia
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Sunday, September 3, 1972
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Page 15
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5B--Sept. 3, 1972 Sunday duette-Mail Commentary If You Remember Dooda, Just Dent One for Denises By Rossell Baker .. .- w York TiTne « Se WASHINGTON-Labor has had many heroes and innovators besides George Meany and President Nixon, and while no one would wish to deprive those two of their due in glory this Labor Day weekend it is only fair that we recall a few of the others. One of the most revered is Kpoppos, an ancient Cretan Minotaur herder who invented featherbedding after helping herd the Minotaur into the abyrinth at Knossos. Kpoppos and his colleague, Kmommos, were sitting on a rocky hillside outside Knossos one afternoon watching the Minotaur chew on an offering of Athenian youth when Kmommos asked the now historic question: "What are you going to do for a living when they finish the labyrinth?" "With that question," Kpoppos wrote in his autobiography, "the scales fell from my eyes." Once the Minotaur was safely sealed into the labyrinth, Minotaur herders would no longer be needed to protect it from wolves on the mountainside or restrain it from descending into Knossos and chewing on the local Cretan youth. * * * KBOBBOS IMMEDIATELY saw the point, for he had no job training for anything except dovetailing labyrinth comers. !N 7 either had any of the other labyrinth dovetailers. Next day at a meeting with King Minos, Kpoppos threatened a strike by Minotaur herders and labyrinth builders unless jobs were provided for them in perpetuity. King Minos said he did not know where perpetuity was and, in any case, did not intend to build any labyrinths there for any more Minotaurs. He was "fed up" with the present Minotaur, he said, and if'Queen Pasiphae presented him with a new one she was going to hear from his lawyers. The king quickly changed his tune when Kpoppos signaled Kmommos to walk off the job and let the Minotaur come to town for dinner. In the resuting contract, the king agreed to keep everybody on the payroll, with cost-of-living escalators, until the fall of Rome. How many of us remember Dooda, the Carthaginian pyre builder, who originated the concept of overtime pay? It was a Friday evening, just at quitting time, when Queen Dido galloped up to Dooda's pyre shop and asked him to build her a pyre on the highest coastal point overlooking the Mediterranean. Dooda said he would start Monday morning. The queen said Monday would be too late. Her lover, Aeneas, had already put to sea to found Rome, she explained, and if she couldn't immolate herself on a pyre before midnight he would be half way to Naples and never see the flames. Doodfi. who was sick and tired of the monarchy in Carthage at that time, on account of its embarrassing erotic passions for fly-by-night adventurers on their way to found empires hither and yon, told the queen he was sorry, but h e had promised to take his wife to an elephant-baiting at the Hannibal Arena that night. Dido countered by offering to pay him one-and-a-half times his usual wage. Why not double time?" Dooda inquired. "If it were a holiday, I would," the queen said, and that is how time-and-a-half for overtime was born. * * * THE PATRON of parking-lot attendants is the Egyptian, Dentses II. who parked camels I for the quests whenever Cleapatra had a large I party. One night, whie getting the camels for i the queen's departing guests, Dentses was ; handed a bunch of grapes by one of his i clients, apparently as a token of gratitude. The following week, after bringing this same guest's camel around, Dentses was handed a small obelisk. The week after that the man gave him 25 yards of mummy wrapping. Dentses's gratitude diminished in the fourth week when, after having his camel delivered, the guest gave Dentses a shabby stuffed crocodile such as you could buy anywhere along the Nile for the equivalent of three cents. Dentses decided to show his displeasure with the guest's offering by denting the hump of the man's camel next time he parked it. He did so. The man made a scene, but all the other quests--who had never given the camel parking attendant anything for bringing their camels around, began handing him sarcophagi and crows and asps until Dentses made it a matter of policy to dent the hump of any camels whose owners failed to come across. One night after a wild party at Cleopatra's, a short-tempered Roman named Mark Antony, who had not given Dentses anything the week before, leaped onto his camel and noticed a bad dent in the hump. Antony jumped off and split Dentses fatally with his sword, saying, "If this hump denting is permitted to go on, it could create a terrible situation for posterity." Mark Antony's blow was too late, and parking-lot attendants everywhere tomorrow will, as they say in the trade, dent one for Dentses." 1972-Thi Krtter Cl. Items nt Men Effective Silt. 3 turn Sept. i. For Your Shop- ing Convenien- ience your local Kroger Store will be OPEN LABOR DAY 10 ti , 7 Ever? p«ch«f* ·' Krtffer'i frciti Fruifi ·ltd VcRilvblfi, italtd by Kr*fet'i tl*«r pUitit film, mint lie iii treili wtwn y«v b«f H! II fern 'r« net c«*tplel«lr latiifitrf Krtgtr will npltc* fwr iltm »r rttimd Tttrr MM- ·T- U.S. Govt. Inspected Fresh Mixed Parts Frying Chicken Bartlett Pears Package Includes 3 Leg Quarter! with Bock, J §r««t Quarters with Back, 3 Wings and 2 Pkgs. Giblets Includin Necks New Books at Library Among the titles received last week at the Kanawha County Public Library: Fiction--Kremlin, A p p o i n t - ment With Yesterday; Gill, The Listener; Johnston, The Late Mrs. Fonsell; Settle, The Clam Shell; Tournier, The Ogre. Nonfiction--Angier, One Acre Frank Loesser Songbook; Lord, The Dawn's Early Light; Martin, The American Sisterhood; Medvedev, Let History Judge; Messerli, Horace Mann, Meyer, Guide To Drug Rehabilitation; Muskie, Journey; Nagler, Brown Bomber; Oliver, Dinner At Buckingham Palace; And Security-How to Live Off|Peter, The Peter Prescription; Teen-age Reader; Cole, Heraldry And Floral Forms. . .; Corbett, The Illustrations Collection; Downs; Famous American Books; Gay, Historians At Work; Goodman, America In The Twenties; Greer, The Great School Legend; Guild, The Librarian's Manual; Harrod, The Librarian's Glossary; Hobson, Full Circle; Jameson Marxism And Form; McGannon, Fiere- man, F. D.; Maldonado, Design, »T _ i. _ _ i 1 ·« · .. _. _ O J The Earth Without Ruining It; iPinkney, The American Way 0 H Nature . And Revolution; Marsh- Badillo, A Bill Of No Rights; Barnet, Roots Of War; Bar-Zohar, Spies In The Promised Violence; Prcscott, Soundings: Encounters With Contemporary Books; Settle, The Scopes Trial; burn, Murder And Withcraft In England, 1550-1640; Martin. Thei Concise Encyclopedia Guide To S h a k e s p e a r e ; Martin, The American Sisterhood; Menninger, A Guide To Psychiatric Books ; Meyer, Guide To Drug Rehabilitaton; N e w m a n , Library Media Services in Appala/^Hia · fVMAill tXTA*-»A« A 4- L Land; Bird, The Crowding Syn-|Schell, Modern China: The Sto- drome; Bowen, The High Sier-iry Of A Revolution; Shogan, A ra; Breaker, Strike; Cohen, The|Quest Of Judgment; Smith, Dec- Learning Child; Coudert, The larstion Of Conscience; Tho- Alcoholic In Your Life; Downs, reau, Thoreau's Cape Cod; Ylr- Famous American Books; Drey-iich, Elizabeth: Vance, The Dec-i er, Jesus; Feuerlieht, Joe Mc-jorative Art Of Dried Flower lachia; O'Neill, Women At Carthy And McCarthyism: The!Arrangement: Vidal, An Eve- Work; Rocke, The Grandilo- Hate That Haunts America: ning With Richard Nixon. Iquent Dictonary; Settle. The Gehlen, The Service; Graham, Reference--Settle, The Clam'Scopes Trial; Stanford Research Dove; Hamilton-Paterson, The Shell; Battersby, The Decora: Institute, A Study Of Surface Greedy War; Hansberry, Les live Thirties; Benton, Supervi-|M nin g in W. Va.; Topics In Blancs; Holmes, The Languagelsion And Management; Bester- i Afro-American Studies; Ther- Of Trust; Hoyt, The Nixons: An man , Commerce: Manufacturesi m a' Characteristics Of The A m e r i c an Family; Hughes,'And Labour; Bloom, Shake- Moon; Thomas, Racism And Tight Lines And Dragonflies;ispeare's Garden; Braudy, Jean:Psychiatry; Wolf, The Origins Lind. Numbers; Loesser, The'Renoir; Carlsen, Books And The| 0f Western Art. CAREERS IN TECHNICAL EDUCATION CARVER CAREER CENTER at Maiden, W. Va. Offers Fulltime training in eight occupations These one year programs ore approved by Kanawha County Schools, the Veterans Administration and the State Department of Education. Aufo Mechanics--includes an understanding of the modern automobile ond automotive systems. Starting date--September 6, 1972. Industrial electricity-- includes a knowledge of circuits, residential and industrial wiring and maintenance, A. C. and D. C. circuitry. Starting date- September 6,1972. Mine Ma/nfenance--involves repair of mine machinery which includes welding, hydraulics, and understanding of the many uses of electricity. Starting date--October 2,1972. Industrial Maintenance--involves repairing industrial equipment, which includes machine shop operations, welding, sheet metal and fabrication. Starting date--October 2,1972. Welding--involves blueprint reading, applied metallurgy and the skills of oxyacetylene, arc, m. i. g. and t. i. g. welding processes. Starting date- September 6, 1972. Building Construction--involves the understanding and application of the building trades. It includes masonry, rough and finish carpentry, painting ond concrete work. Starting date--September 6, 1972. Machine Accounting--involves modern accounting procedures, office ond accounting machines, keypunch training and typing. Starting date-October 2,1972. Sales Occupations--includes merchandising, sales techniques, display, business principles, use of cash register and sign making. Starting date-October 16,1972. Persons seeking information should call Mr. Charles T. Patrick or Mr. Jim Dolan at the Carver Center. Phone 925-1146. Kohn's Vac Pak Quarter Sliced Pork Loin Cut Into Morket Bosket Kroger Orange Pmeapple Rainbo* $1 " 33 Size -8-75-oz. -- - -- Super Size Sliced Bacon Pork Chops Margarine Sherbet Colgate 89* 89* 51121177c Orange, Fruit Punch, Ping or Pong U.S. Covt. Graded Choice ' Chuck Steak Stokely Fruit Cocktail 46-oz, Cans 16-oz. Can "c. U.S. Govt. Inspected I Turkey Drumsticks Country Club, Plain or Lemon Custard Angel Food Cake Yellow Cling Halves and Slices, Stokely Peaches 15-oz, 29-oz. Cans 16-Ounce Regular or Diet Pepsi-Cola I ROM Wilrl Coupon ·· Coupon e x p i r e s September 9, 1972 S ' S u b j e c t t o applicable state M and local sales tai." mimiiiiiiiimmiimiU Pack ~ A | O X A e r o s o l M | Window Cleaner i m* Just in time (or your tall cleaning ^ *3»s2r s Wilh JJ Coupon" Plus Deposit K R O G t R Fr eeze Dried Coffee 5 plasters Choke jj . = jar Wiih 'Sm Coupon eipires September J. 1172 ·· "Subject t« ipplicille state J" -- i and (veil sales ti»." einires September 9. 1972 'Subject to applicable s l a t e nil local sales tai " ^Btll"VALU A B L L K ROGi.^ OUPQN' Turtles ^Panty Hose i 74 Wit* C»UP(" mm Ciupen eipires Segtenktr V 197; Suhjtct ti A?plieiilt Stilt ml Unl T»ies imiiiiiiimimiiimimi For Your Shopping Convenience-All Kanawha Valley Kroger Stores Open Sunday ID A.M. Till 7 P,M Madison Open! 2 Noon Till 6 P.M. H

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