The Gazette from Montreal, Quebec, Canada • 33

THE GAZETTE, MONTREAL, THURSDAYMARCH 5, 1998 D7 ENTERTAINMENT Say it ain't Joe: Cannon fires blanks in Expos booth kids and spending four years in jaiL Good thinking, Tom. Under terms of his bail, Lee cannot have any contact with 8-week-old Dy Saturday afternoon, my errands all finished, I got home and flipped on the kitchen radio. Great time to tune in the last few innings of the first Expos' broadcast of the season, while I was putting xy uwm i jhh. lan and 18-month-old Brandon, not even through a third party Lee is due in court March 13. Until then, he says, "I'm asking everyone to please notjudgemeor the situation until you have heard all the facts." gauntlet into the theatre, teen model Ivanka Trump, daughter of churlish real-estate tycoon Don Trump, scurried as quickly as her mini-skirt would let her, to catch up with noted hunk Gabriel Byrne.

Behind her, skintight-sheathed stunner Jennifer (Selena) Lopez cracked, "I guess that's what Daddy's money buys you." Of course the line was loud enough for the Trumpette to hear, and of course she responded: "Why don't you come here and say that to my face?" Somebody hurried them both along before the claws could come out Oh, shut up: Actress Ashley Judd explains that she's more than just a pretty face: "If someone sleeps with me they get lucky in more ways than one. They get phenomenal loyalty and a genuine understanding and support" the Paramount studio, to re-record dialogue for the film Blue Vision, which also stars Annette Bening. It turns out that his previous passes to go to work were pretty well secret -even the big shots in the sheriff's office didn't know. This week, though, the district attorney's office and the sheriff's office were in court fighting the special release for Downey sets a bad example for the Dull Normals, etc but it was too late. Judge Lawrence Mira said Downey needs to learn to work without drugs and this is a good way to do it Tommy Lee speaks! Out on bail on that charge of giving spouse Pamela Lee a broken fingernail and a reddened area on her back, the Motley Criie rocker says he is "very distressed" at the prospect of losing his come the dulcet tones of sidekick Joe Cannon.

And the first thing he says is some drivel about how "the Expos and Cardinals are co-sharing this beautiful new Co-sharing. What a blockhead. Where have you gone, Duke Snider? Still, it was nice to hear Van Home's voice. Summer will come, it really wilL Just a few more months Robert Downey noted druggie actor, will get out of jail to finish a movie. (And some people say there's no such thing as the Important Persons Act!) Downey, serving six months in the clink for parole violations after a whole range of drug-related craziness charges, has had a couple of these passes before.

This time he and a chap-erone from the LA. County Sheriff's Department will have two day trips to away the groceries. It was a spring training game from Jupiter, Fla. where the Expos were playing the Cardinals. What a pleasure it would be, I told myself, to hear for the first time in 'Ilk DOUG CAMILLI Downey: doing time -sort of.

The New York Post reports a case of duelling starlets at the New York premiere of The Man in the Iron Mask. As the celebs ran the photographer months the summery voice of the veteran man Dave Van Horne. The ad comes to an end. Now the background noise is unmistakably that of a ballpark. And here Bodybuilder found guilty of stalking Spielberg Between rock and what's next Tortoise's latest is easy-listening, label-defying fun Just in time for Tortoise's third release, the Zeitgeist enforcers down at Wire magazine have decided that "post-rock," a genre coined almost specifical and associates and brought with him handcuffs, duct tape and a razor knife.

Prosecutors called the equipment a "rape kit" and alleged that Norman wanted to handcuff Spielberg and his wife, actress Kate Capshaw, and make her watch while the director was sexually assaulted. When Norman came to Spielberg's home, the director and his family were in Ireland where he was making a film. Spielberg, 50, told jurors last week that he has suffered from anguish, nightmares and fears for his family ever since he was told about Norman's plot to hold him captive and rape him. Associated Press SANTA MONICA, Calif. A 31-year-old bodybuilder accused of plotting to rape Steven Spielberg was convicted yesterday of stalking the film-maker.

The jury must now decide whether Jonathan Norman's sentence should be based on his previous convictions, which would make him eligible for California's "third strike" law mandating 25 years to life in prison. Norman was arrested after he made two attempts to enter Spielberg's home last June and July. Police said he had lists of Spielberg's family members THE NEW POLLUTION ly in response to Tortoise, is no more, and have opted for the equally elusive identifier, avant-rock, to index the I LAN A KRONICK If it wasn't preposterous to peg a particular fusion of circa '96 high-brow styles with the catch-all "post rock," then it was at least ridiculously myopia The new Tortoise record, ponderously entitled TNT, is not strictly post-rock, or even "post-post rock" (which had unbelievably been suggested for the electronic mutations in the family). TNT is easy listening that's no more difficult, and little more fun, to wrap your ears around than a Muzak piece Original players John McEntire, John Herndon, Douglas McCombs and David Pajo (since departed to focus on the resolutely more rock-based Aerial M) are now joined by jazzer Jeff Parker, which might help explain the almost complete absence of rock aesthetic. There's a lot of charming, chiming minimalist textures, wet bass lines, augmented chords, latin grooves, accordion noodlings, and Stereolabesque delicacies but rock, nuh-uh.

Today's Tortoise has nothing to do with rock post past or present. Especially not avant-rock. Whatever, wherever, and whenever that is. Tortoise's new album, TNT, (on Thrill Jockey) is available at fine music shops around the city. come equipped with the warning, "For Mature Listeners Only." Rock itself has rarely factored into the post-rock equation.

There was (and still is) no candy chorus, no visceral riff, no cheating way to enjoy bands like For Carnation, 5ive Style (both Tortoise offshoots), June of 44, Jessamine, Labradford, Ui, etc. who each hadhave their own spin on the anti-juvenile theme. Liking post-rock has always necessitated concentration and contemplation. The apocalyptic spirit, the constant reminder that this stuff is supposed to signpost the end of rock, sometimes helps to enjoy the challenging vibe. That and the threat of digging it or dying a dated loser with an antiquated fondness for pop songs.

A couple years later and the youthful interest in outer-rock noises spans far beyond the, dare we say now, yawn-fest trappings of post-rock. The fact that Tortoise's most engaging listen, the 2-year-old Millions Now Living Will Never Die, probably warmed up the average rockite to the likes of electronica, actuelle and even jazz, only proves that anything "beyond rock" ceases to be rock simply by virtue of inspiring the appreciation of anything but rock. Tim Allen sues over account of traffic accident band's distinctly un-rock tendencies. So, that which used to be beyond rock now lies ahead of it? As if it wasn't difficult enough to nominate what could come after post-rock. It used to make sense.

Post-rock was an irresponsible, near-sighted nomenclature attached to a mostly Chicago-based sound that had not only grown out of rock, but had largely outgrown it. Rock was for kids. Post-rock was not Conservatively infused with jazzy gestures, pensive chords, coolly self-conscious inflections of dub, lounge, and electronics, and marked by a distinct exclusion of vocal melody, every Tortoise and Tortoise-like release of the past few years might as well have Ferrari in Studio City, Calif. He filed a suit there against Allen, who was not ticketed. Allen, who has a home in suburban Detroit, sued on Tuesday, claiming Armstrong falsely portrayed him as heartless and under the influence of drugs or alcohol.

In June, Allen was fined for driving while impaired in Michigan. Associated Press PONTIAC, Mich. Home Improvement star Tim Allen is suing a California man for $12 million over a tabloid account of a traffic accident. Henry Armstrong, a 72-year-old retired film librarian, told the National Enquirer that he was hit by Allen's Top 10 Albums Week of March 1 Last Week 2 1 4 3 5 7 6 Nationally 1 4 9 2 3 7 10 19 5 8 ArtistTitle Will SmithBig Willie Style UsherMy Way Jean Wyclef Carnival Janet JacksonVetvet Rope MaseHarlem World Puff DaddyNo Way Out LoxMoney Power Respect Erykah BaduBaduizm Destiny's ChildDestiny's Child RideSoundtrack. Top 20 Singles Montreal Metro Top 20 Current Albums Montreal Metro Week of March 1 Week of March 1 This Last This Last This Week Nationally ArtistTitle Week Week Nationally ArtistTitle Week Week 1 1 Elton JohnSomethingCandle in Ill TitanicSoundtrack 1 1 2 3 MadonnaFrozen 2 rilC Andrea BocelliRomanza 2 3 2 Puff Daddy FamilyBeen 5 3 2 Celine DionLets Talk About Love 3 4 4 7 Notorious B.I.G.M0 Money 4 21, Various ArtistsNotre Dame de Paris 6 5 5 68 Real McCoyAutomatic Lover 2 5 30 Lynda LemayLynda Lemay 4 6 6 15 Somethln' For the PeopleMy Love 6 6 5 Spice GirlsSpiceworld 7 1 6 14 Spice GirlsToo Much 13 7 3 Various Artists 5 9 8 16 Backstreet BoysAt! I Have to Give 42 Joe DasslnMeilleurBestof) 10 8 30 Peal JamGiven to Fly 17 9 6 Savage GardenSavage Garden 11 10 56 Ultra NateFree 13 jio, ,10 Various ArtistsWomen $ong 10' 11 24 U2Popheart 6 11 13 Bryan AdamsUnplugged 9 9 HansonI Will Come to You 11 7 VA-1998 Grammy NomlneesG.N, '98 173 1 11 6 UsherNice Slow 13 17 Will SmithBig Willie Style 14 2 14 113 Capital SoundHigher Love 3 14 v512 Jam Yield.

8 3 14 23 Notorious B.I.G.Sky's the Limit 15 '16 Sarah McLachlanSurfacing 18 4 16 13 Spice GirlsSpice up Your Life (CD5)) 6 ig 95 Ero RamazzottfEros Italian Vers. 17 33 Backstreet BoysAll I Have to Give 17 34 UsherMy Way 13 7 17 i 68 ColdcutTimber 18. 4 AquaAquarium, ,16: 8 17 28 Refugee Camp All StarsAvenue 9 19 55 BrightmanCubaBocelllLSOTime 12 9 17 22 Shania TwainDon't be Stupid 20 48 Jean WyclefCamival 10 Top 10 Hard Music Week of March 1 1 2 3 6 4 7 Pearl JamYield Our Lady PeaceClumsy Blink -182Dude Ranch CreedMy Own Prison MetalllcaRe-Load Green Day Nimrod Foo FightersColour and the Shape Mighty Mighty BosstonesLet's Face Led ZeppelinBBC Sessions Jlml HendrlxUltimate Experience 1 3 5 2 4 6 8 10 16 17 Rating based on retail record sales Source SoundScan. Inc. BRIEFS Sprint Discover Flying Wallendas plan tightrope stunt prttut 1 wines.

palate as Canadian Music Week shifts into gear with hundreds of performances. Over the next few nights at bars and clubs throughout the downtown core, more than 300 bands from across Canada and beyond will showcase their talent or lack of in the hopes of catching the ears of music industry insiders in town for their annual conference. The conference is a mix of music and deal-making. Public performances continue through Saturday at venues including The Rivoli, Lee's Palace, Club Shanghai and C'est What WINE FOOD WEEKEND MARCH 27 TO 29, 1998 DETROIT Thirty-six years after two members of the Flying Wallendas fell to their deaths in a tightrope stunt, a new generation is returning to perform the same act without a net "I don't think the shadows of the past will hinder us," said Tino Wallenda-Zoppe, who was 11 when the accident happened Jan. 30, 1962, at the Michigan State Fairgrounds.

This week, Wallenda-Zoppe leads the family back to Detroit to recreate the seven-person Great Pyramid high-wire stunt that resulted in two deaths and three injuries as 7.000 horrified spectators watched. The Wallendas have repeated the stunt only twice, in 1963 and 1977, and not in Detroit But they plan no fewer than 38 Great Pyramid performances during the 17-day Shrine Circus that begins Friday Discover the relaxed and creative epicurean lifestyle of California. Well introduce you to great California wines and the renowned spa cuisine of Guest Chef Jean-Pierre Challet It's sure to be a gastronomic journey of incomparable wine tasting, great dining and informative seminars where you'll also learn the art of chocolate-making and discover the fine -art of enjoying cigars. Wine Institute Of California The Rolling Stones IMPORTANT NOTICE! EXCHANGE EXTENSIONS Exchange March 2 to 8 RE: April 19 and 20 at the Molson Centre Patrons who purchased tickets at the Olympic, Stadium or through the Admission outlets tn the Greater Montreal area only: Must present themselves in person and with their tickets in hand at the Molson Centre Box Office to exchange or refund PRIOR TO MARCH 8. Patrons who purchased tickets by telephone or at an Admission outlet outside of the Greater Montreal area; Must return their tickets by mail with their name, address and phone number and indicate if they wish to exchange their tickets or jet a refund to: Reseau Admission Inc.

P.O. Box 320, Station Montreal, Quebec H2L 4X1. Your pre-assigned seats will be returned to you by mail. Friday and Saturday accommodation Welcome Win Food Reception Breakfast and lunch on Saturday Seminars Tasting Salon Gala Dinner and Wine Tasting Sunday Brunch Gratuities Bare butts are key LINCOLN, Neb. The former animator and director of The Simpsons says the secret to the show's success is not in the stars but in the moon.

"Fox would prefer we have more naked butts, please," David Silverman said before a recent appearance at the University of Nebraska. He said whenever a character's exposed rear was shown. Fox used it to promote that week's episode. "If it was on any other network. The Simpsons would not be what it is today," he said.

Silverman directed The Simpsons when it began nine years ago. He left in 1996 to work for DreamWorks SKG. Questions from the crowd of mostly college students ranged from whether the character Smithers is gay Silverman said yes -to how long the series will run (another year and possibly longer, he said). Magazine apologizes MELBOURNE, Australia A gossip magazine apologized to Demi Moore and Bruce Willis for a story called Demi's Bulimia Hell that said the couple's marriage was in trouble. The apology and retraction ran a full page in this week's issue of New Idea.

Willis and Moore sued the magazine last year, denying there was any truth to the story Space Is limited so call to reserve today! 819.423.6341 or 1.800.441.1414 0 IE CHATEAU M0J1TEBEIL0 Morton Centre Box Office Hours March 24,5,1: noon to 4 pm March 4, I 7: noon to pm CAAt PACIFIC TILS Toronto to rock TORONTO From psychedelic hip hop to goth-flavoured heavy metal bands, there's lots to satisfy the music Harfway between Montrl and Ottawa or. Hjhvy 148. FOR ADDITIONAL INFORMATION CALL 790-1245 OR 1-800-361-4595.