The Alliance Herald from Stafford, Kansas • 7

No Fun Being President. gourmand. It is inexplicable how FARIi NOTES. Endorsed and ree9itu mended bu the.ntii. uuiutwap-iuueouHjio Baca an extent tnat bit labor wasexeeMinrlYrmrw densometome.

A vacation of ampata did not give me much relief, but on the crwallo It increasedDrostrationandsinkiaffchi Atthiatima iK.m.a..i iVT. xvn dj aTe 5 three bottles of tT uurmgmy umess, ana wita aoable tne ease. With the tranquil nerve dJWtot clearness of thonght never before eaioyed. Ifthe Tonic hasnot done the work, lknow net what. I give it thecredit, J.

p. Watsov. Pastor Christian r. rine jron onte toxidm of Iron. JPrrtt-ria Hark, ntl Witntt.

iphates, associated I If If A in A I enptnhl lAromaties. Itserres I every purpose. ehere AtARUFACTUKEB IT THE DR. HARTER MEDICINE HQ. 213 H08TH MAIM STREET.

ST. LOUIS. Two cows well sheltered in winter -will produce more milk and butter rthan three unsheltered animals, though no more than half the feed required for the three should be given to the two. It is a remarkable fact that you can a tiiivj our uuauuiY ui o-i. jlj.

som's Butter Color and the effect will not be different than from eating the same amount of Butter. No farmer should neglect to use so harmless a color. ThP TTOsPnfc rnnsnmntion of wool is running largely on tne Dest woois. jv i 1 Low and coarse wools are neglected, if we except carpet descriptions, be- -c i. cause iuauuiituLiuera aie tuiimig um a.

better class of goods than usual, for 1 which there is a quick sale. Foreign wool is selling so high abroad that we cannot expect any cheap importation of fine wools. Colman's Rural world: rorK.is looking up and will go up still higher. But why will not farmers learn to slaughter and put up all the hogs they raise? If pork packers make a fabu- lous fortune by buying hogs and slaughtering them and saving the meat, whv will not farmers hnd the same business profitable? Pork of all kinds will be vey high next summer, and the farmer who has his smoke house well filled with it, will have a little fortune on his hands. Breeders Live-Stock Journal: The benefit derived fiom the introduction of a fine breeding animal into any given community is not as remote, nor as n- definite as many seem to think.

In fact, the good results are immediate and lasting. Elevating the quality of the breed is not the only consequence to be noted in such a case, but it serves as an active factor to stir up, healthy competition among one's neighbors, which is the life of the stock trade, as truly as of others. An ant hd on the lawn mav be de- stxnvfif! with lint wafer? stir nn the hed and nmir nn bnilinfr water bv Taurine on strong brine thev mav ha driven awav. but as thev mteht takn nn miar- era as obiectinnable. it is al wavs best to destroy them.

When the bed is far enough frnm fhe hnnse and in a nnsi- tion to admit of it, they may be de- hvhnilninor firn nrnnnrl them I and when hot enough, with a hoe dig the bed up and thus burn them when the bed is 'well dug out fill the hole with coals. There is quite a3 much necessity for barn-cleaning on the farm as for house- cleaning, and if farmers were as punctilious about the renovation and purification of out buildings as farm ers' wives are about the dwelling, there would speedily De an improvement in the appearance of things as well as or convenience. or mis placed tools are brought to light, barn, shed, and shop furnishings put in order, space gained, and there is a revival of cheerfulness everywhere. Find time for barn cleaning. The Dun is halt tne nerd; tnus a duii of the best milking strain of blood used even in a small lot of dairy cows greatly and at once improve each of his get.

And the high-priced bull, though seemingly extravagant at the start, soon returns to its owners a heavy profit. Of late years the Jersey importations have been scattered wide- ly over the land, and the butter dairies and creameries are realizing the profits Laramie Boomerang. It is not an enjoyable treat some times to be the editor of a paper, and mould public opinion at so much per mould, and get complimentary tickets to the slisht-of-hand performances, but with its care and worry, its heartaches and apprehensions, it is more comforting on the whole than being president. When we were a boy, and sat in the front row among the pale-haired boys with checked gingham shirts at the Sunday School, and the teacher told us to live uprightly and learn a hundred verses of the Scriptures each week so that we could be president, we thought that unruffled calm and universal ap- probation waited upon the man who successfully rose to be the executive of a great nation With years and accumulated wisdom, however, we have changed our mind. Now we sit at our desk and write burning words for the press that will live and keep warm long after we are turned to dust and ashes.

We write heavy editorials on the pork outlook, and sadly compose exhaustive treatises on the chinch bug, while men in other walks of life go out into the health-promoting mountains, and catch trout and woodticks. Our lot is not, pernaps, a joyous one. We swelter through the long July days with our suspenders hanging in limp festoons down over our chair, while we wield the death-dealing pen. but we do not want to be president. Our sallary is smaller, it is true, but when we get through our work in the middle of the night, and put on our plug hat and steal home through the all-pervading darkness, we thank our stars, as we split the kindling and bed down the family mule, that on the morrow, although we may be licked by the man we wrote up to-day, our of- ficial record can not be attacked.

There is a nameless joy that settles down upon us as we retire to our simple couch on the floor, and pull the cellar door over us to keep us warm, which the world can neither give nor take away. We plod along from day to day, slic kg great wads of mental pabulum from our bulging intellect, never niur muring nor complaining when lawyers and physicians put on their broad brim Chip hats and go out to the breezy canyons and the shady glens to regain UltJJX JlttcUUl. We just plug along from day to day, eating a hard boiled egg from one hand while we write a scathing criticism on the sic transit gloria cucumber with the other. No, -we do not crave the proud posi tion of president, nor do we hanker to climb to an altitude where forty or fifty millions of civilized people can distinctly see whether we eat custard pie with a knife or not. Once in a while, however, in the stillness of the night, we kick the covers off, and moan in our dreams as we imagine that we are president, and we wake with the cold, damp swea (or prespiration, as the case may be) standing out of every pore, only to find that we are not president after all.

bv an overwhelming majority, and we ge up and steal away to the rain-water barrel and take a drink, and go back to a dreamless, snoreless sleep. Fish as Food. Good Words. Pound for pound, fish is fully as nu tritious as butcher meat. It may no seem so satisfying, but that is because the sense of satifaction which we ex no direct or immediate way related to the nourishment of the organism as a whole.

Very few of the solid substances we eat are digested, even so far as the stomach is concerned, in less than an hour, and nutrition cannot commence until after digestion has proceeded for some time. It follows that the feeling of satifaction produced by solid food during a meal must be due to the appeasing or those cravings which are set up in the stomach rather than the supply of the needs of the system. Inasmuch as butcher's meat is less easy of digestion than fish, and it gives the stomach more to do, it is easy to see "why it seems, at the moment, more satisfying. Looking to the ultimate purpose of nutrition, fish is the better kind of food; it is more readily and completely reduced in the stomach, and it nourishes the organism more thoroughly, and with less physical inconvenience than the flesh of warm-blooded animals. A common error in regard to the use of fish is the failure to recognize that there are two distinct classes of this staple, looked at as a food.

In one class which may be represented by the mackerel and the salmon, the oil and fat are distributed throughout the flesh, while in the ether, of which the cod and whiting may be taken as examples, the oil and fat are found almost exclusively in the internal organs, notably the liver. Now, the oil and fat are necessary, and if the fish is not cooked and eaten whole, or nearly so, these most important part3 are wasted. In cleansing fish, as little as possible should be removed. This is a point of the highest practical moment. Fishmongers and cooks need to be instructed afresh on the subject To omit any portion of the liver of a cod in preparing the dish for the table 13 to throw away a great delicacy.

A cod's liver properly dressed is a dish for anything so nauseous as the "cod-liver oil" of the chemist and druggist can be I prepared from anything so nice as the liver of a cod. Housekeepers and those who purvey for the table should take care tnat notning eaiDie in a nsn is sacrificed. For cooking purposes it may be assumed that fish is not only good food, but food of the best description, well able to supply he needs of the system, and particular- easy or digestion, iz is equally serviceable for the weakly as for the robust, the young as the old. You Are No Gentleman. All The Tear Ejund.

jju vuu Udu yuuiacii. a gcuuciutuii is the commonest and most withering form of sarcasm in use, not only among snobs, but among costermongers, coal- heavers and the like. To persons of admitted pretentions to gentility the question is frequently put, and pernaps negatively answered by the questioner when the superior person declines to recognize a false or exorbitant claim. Thus not long ago I was asked if I called myself a gentleman ny a "young lady at a refreshment bar, because I demurred at paying her a sovereign ror not navmg run away witn a purse which I had inadvertantly left on the counter for five minutes. And two of her friends declared that I was "no gentleman," without leaving any doubt in the matter.

I have been called "no gentleman" for not paying a cabman three times his fare, and for objecting to pay furnished lodgmgs for ar ticles which I had neither ordered or consumed. A loafer in the street has sometimes picked up a glove before I could do it myself, or told me that my hankerchief was hanging out of my pocket. In any other country than England the commonest man paying such attentions as these would be in sulted by this offer of a reward, but in this country I have been freely called "no gentleman" for not encouraging the lowest kind of what i3 vulgarly called "cadging." It seems, indeed, that to be a gentleman in the eyes of large classes of the community you must pay whatever may be demanded ot you upon any pretext, and ask no questions. Socially, the term "gentleman," has become almost vulgar. It is certainly less employed by gentlemen than by inferior persons.

one speaks of "a man I know," and the other of "a gentleman I know." In the one case the "gentleman" is taken for granted, and in the other it seems to need specification. Again, as regards the term "lady." It is quite in accordance with the rules of society to speak of your acquaintance the duchess, as "a very nice person." People wno would say "a very nice lady," are not generally of a social class which has much to do with duchesses; and if you speak of one of these as a "person" you will soon be made to feel your mistake. Story of the Tomato. A Pennsylvanian says: A good many years ago a man who had re cently arrived from the Bermuda Islands was sent to York county (Pa.) jail for some offense committed against the laws of the commonwealth. He had with him a few seeds which he planted in the rich soil of the jail yard.

Before the plants which sprang from the seed reached maturity he was dis charged, and no one knew the nature of them. They grew luxuriantly, bear ing fruit of a large size and unusual appearance. As this strange fruit ripened its color changed from green to a brilliant red, and became an object of wonder and admiration to all the inmates of the jail. Mrs. Klinefelter, the lady keeper, cautioned all the prisoners against eating -any of the fruit, as she was sure it was poisonous, and besides planted the seed, as she would endeavor to preserve specimens of it for him, should he return in time.

Just when the fruit was fully matured, the Burmuda prisoner revisited the jail and asked to see the plant. This request granted, he next called for pepper, salt and vinegar, and to the horror of the good lady commenced to eat of the supposed poisonous fruit with a relish that astonished the beholders. After enjoying the strange repast, he informed Mrs. K. that the fruit or vegetable was the tomato, or love apple, and it would be found wholesome and nutritious.

The seeds of the remaining tomatoes were carefully preserved and distributed among the friends and neighbors of the lady, and thus this now popular esculent was introduced into the ancient and goodly borough of York. For many years thereafter it was cultivated for ornament rather than for table use, but by degrees its merits began to be more fully understood and appreciated, and there, as elsewhere, it grew into general public favor. Carp in NorlhlCarolina. The carp-raisers in North Carolina are rejoicing over the success attending the introduction ofthi3 excellent fish in that state. One gentleman residing near Greenville, dragged his pond a few days ago and the result astonished him.

The carp that he deposited in January ten months ago of infinitesimal, size an ounce in weight, are now seventeen inches long and weigh four pounds apiece, All that a man gets by lying is, that he is not believed when he speaks the truth. eal profrmsion, for lymjepmia, tie-neral If lebUitif. Female MUm- 11 ease, ani of Vital- itu. IVoxfra- I tion, and Contalea-W the Tonic Since using it 1 have done tvricthalS I A SURE CURE FOR Sick Headache, Dyspepsia, Langour, Nervous Exhaustion arising from overwork or excess of any kind, AND FOR- Female Weaknesses. -IT PREVENTS Malarial Poisoning aM Feyer and Agne, And is a Specific for Obstinate CONSTIPATION.

PRICE $1.00 PES BOTTLEj SIX FOR $5.00 SOLD BY DRUGGISTS EVERYWHERE. MEYER BROS. WhoUssU Aassts. Ksjtss City sad SL Levis. M.

3 If you are Interested In the inquiry TYIiicIi is the best Liniment for Man and Beast? this is the answer, attested by two generations the MEXICAN MUSTANG L1N MENT. Tho reason is siin pie. It penetrates erery sore, wound, or lameness, to tho very bone, and drives out all inflammatory and morbid matter. It goes to tho root of the trouble, and never fails to cure in double quick time If you are a man Mvif you are a ened by tho strain of your duties aroid or business. weaK- man of let- night work, to restore brain nerve and waste, use Hop B.

suffering from any la-tion if you are mar-younsf, sulrerinjr from in on a bed of sick-Bitters. etimuiani.i aii us a Hop Bitters. If you are younpr Rod discretion or dissipa ried or single, old or poor health or languish ness, rely on Hop Whoever you arc, whenever you feel that your system needs cloanslntr. ton- Thousands die annually from some form of Kidney disease that mik'ht hare been presented by a timely use of lnj? or rtimulating, without in toxicaling take Hop Hoptzitters 3 HaTeyoudys- vepsia, kidney D. I.

C. Is an absolute or urinary com-1 'A of the stomach, 1 and lrresista-. bla cure for i use of opium, boicelK, blood liver or nerves 17 Ton will be cured If you use Hop Bitters tobacco, or narcotics. Soldbydrnp-tristA. Send fur If youaresim- ply a anu low spirited, try it! It may Circular.

BOP EmXE3 rro co.f Qoeaettcr, X. T. Toronto, Out. save your life, it has saved unci reds. EX-SOLDI ERS WVUiUll-l IW should all send for sample cory of that wonderful piper, the "WOULD AND SOLDIER, published at WghJngt I.

It contains Stories of the War, Camp Life, Scene from the Battle-field, and a thousand things of inierest to -ur country's It is the great ildiers paper. It contains all the Laws and Instructions relating to Pensions ind Bounties for soldiers and their heirs. Every ex-so ihould enroll his name under the WOULD AND SOLDIKIl bann-r at once. Kight weekly. $1 a year.

Sample free. Addrss WOULD AX1) SOLDIKIU Hox 5iA. Wasltlngton. C. HEADQUARTERS FOR SHEET MUSIC MUSIC BOOKS.

SullotlXLS INJ0. lO C3 Now ready for free distribution, with 100 samples ot music, two to tour toet each. Discount 20 per cent cl on $1.00 or upwards. Special rates to Dealers or Teachers. Send three to six cents postage if you want larger package of Catalogues, Bulletins, Songs, etc E.

li. GUILD. Tope kit, Kansas. irainiS, VLlSf whoie4: aad retail aealtrs la all Faixtxks MATTiTtUL OlO Delaware Xmu CUy si vjf ieV Id 1 jiTTMnafllf iZMSMAg hop I wt IIS MCVFP II i-7 Ti KRS.LYDI& P1SKH1H, OFLYHH. LYD1A E.

PiNKHAfVTS VEQETABL5 Is a Positive Cnre for all those Pnlnful Complnlnta and Wealfneuea common to our bet female population. It will cure entirely the worst form of Female Com- tilaints, all ovarian troublei, Inflammation and Ulcera tion, Falling and Displacements, and tne consequent Eplnal Weakness and is particularly adanted to the Change of It wlU dissolve and expel tumors from the uterus In xn early stage of development. The tendency to cancerous humors there is checked very speedily by its use. It removes faintness, flatulency, destroys all craving for stimulants, and relieves weakness of the stomach. It cures Bloating, Headaches, Nervous Prostration, General Debility.

Sleeplessness, Depression and Indigestion. That feeling of bearing down, causing and backache, Is always permanently cured by its use. It will at all times and under all circumstances act in harmony with the laws that govern the female system. For the cure of Kidney Complaint of either sex this Compound is unsurpassed. LTDIA E.

TINKIIAM'S VEGETABLE COM FOUNO is prepared at 233 and 235 Western Avenue, Lynn, Mass. Price $1. Six bottles for $5. Sent by mail in the form of pills, also In the form of lorenges, on receipt of price, 11 per box for aither. Mrs.

Plnkham freely answers oJIletters of inquiry. Bend for pamph-lot. Address as above. Mention this Paper. Xo family should be without LTDIA E.

PIXKHAH'S LIVER PILLS. They cure constipation, biliousnMt and torpidity of the liver. 25 cents per box. KST Sold by all Drug glati. -t does -m WONDERFUL CURES! E2Z BecauReitaclson the LITER, BOWELS and KIDNEYS at the same time.

Because it cleanses the system of the poisonous humors that elone in Kidne? and Uri nary Diseases, Biliousness, Jaundice, fe pation, Piles, or in Eheumatism, Neuralgia, Nervous Disorders and Female Complaints. SEE WHAT PEOPLE SAY Eutrene B. Stork, of Junction Citr. Kansas, id says, Kidney-Wort cured him aCter regular Physicians had been trying for four years. Mrs.

John Washington, Ohio, says uerDoywasgtventintodie by four prominent Shysicians aud that he was afterward cured by Idney-Wort. M. M. B. Goodwin, an editor In Chardon, Ohio, says he was not expected to live, beintr bloated beyond belief, but Kidney-Wort cured him.

Anna L. Jarrett of South Salem, IT. says that seven years sufTerinjr from kidney troubles and other wan ended bv the use ot Evaiuaney-wort. John B. Lawrence of Jackson.

suffered LJfor years from liver and kidney troubles and alter taking "barrels ot oilier medicines," Kidney-Wort made him well. Michael Coto ot Montgomery Center, suffered eight years with kidney difllculty and as nnaoie to woric Kianey-wort mauo mm well as ever." mm PERMANENTLY CURES II KIDNEY DISEASES, I IVhR COMPLAINTS.K Constipation and Piles. centrated, for those that cannot reauily pre pare iw tJT It act i with equal efficiency in either form. GET IT AT THE DRUGGISTS. nilCE.

1.00 WELLS. I'rop'. fWni send the dry post-paid.) THE WHITE eiiis lei 6. THE BEST MADE AND MOST POPULAB SEWING MACHINE in the MARKET It is so simple In construction tnat It Is easily understood. It Is so perfect in its parts that it serer Cets out of order.

It never falls to give complete satisfaction and Is warranted for FIVE YEARS. light runnins and quiet. It Is the best and easiest machine to selL Agent wanted In unoccupied territory. S. E.

HENDERSON, 409 Delaware Kansas City, Mo la JL from the gains produced by the breed- perienced in eating is the result of sup-ing of the natives and grade cows of plying the stomach with food, and in other bloods to the bulls, thus increas ing the value of many herds. Fruit and ornamental trees planted in the fall should always have the protection of a mound of earth about the roots. This should extend, cone- shaped, a3 high up the stem as possi- them from swaying, and from freezing and thawing during winter, but pre vents mice and other vermin from gnawing the tender bark; for these depredators usually do not ascend these hillocks after food. This mound, and the addition of hay bands, is also use ful if you have tender fruit trees. This advise to throw up a mound of earth around the trunk of newly plant-ed trees will apply to all young tress until they get large and the bark hard.

It is a great protection and should be done every fall before the ground is frozen. Morphy, the Chess Player. Paul Morphy, the celebrated chess player is, it is said, afflicted with two singular hallucinations. One is a hor ror of the game of chess; the other is the continual recurring notion that un less he can secure a loan of S200 he will be financially ruined. His condition is well understood by his friends, and he goes about among them asking for a loan of 1200, which is never refused, and which he never takes.

When he drops into an office with this request, apparently, in extreme anxiety, the friend to whom he applies, responds: "Certainly, Mr. Morphy, will you take the money now?" He is instantly calmed with this reply, and goes away with the remark that he will call for it again; but he never loes. He resides in New Orleans. Impatience dries the blood sooner than age or sorrow. Chapin..