Daily News from New York, New York • 59

0 UM Clicked weeper will leave you feeling used i 1 i JOHN Q. With Denzel Washington, Anne Heche, James Woods, Robert Duvall, Ray Uotta. Director Nick Cassavetes. Running time: 100 mint. Rated PG-13 for violence, language and Intense thematic I DRIVING MISS BRITNEY: Taryn Manning (I.) and Spears learn "big" life lessons in a trip West BRITNEY ROAD TRIP CUTS TO THE CHASTE you're still laughing about that absurdly complicated national health-care plan that Hillary Rodham Clinton came up with nearly 10 years ago, get a load of John Q.

Archibald's i 7 CROSSROADS. With Britney Spears, Taryn Manning, Zoe SaMana. Directed by Tamra Davis. Running time: 94 mins. Rated PG-13: Drinking, mature themes.

ultrasimple solution to the bureaucratic nightmare. I When he can't pay for his young son's heart-transplant operation, the otherwise gentle and profoundly decent blue-collar worker takes over the hospital, holds a renowned heart surgeon at gunpoint, and threatens to kill him and a half-dozen other hostages if the system doesn't turn to and fix his kid. Nick Cassavetes' "John as in By ELIZABETH WEITZMAN SPECIAL TO THE NEWS I 'm not a girl, not yet a woman," warbles Britney 0 II Spears in the theme song to "Crossroads," her rather inauspicious film debut. She's just teasing us, of course. By the time the movie's -over, she's definitely a woman.

So, let's get the important stuff out of the way. John Q. Public, is the early front-runner for jaw-dropper of the Til A actly a worst-mov ie contender; Denzel Washington gives such an earnest, moving performance in the I inStm I Tur wy lk. IV I 111. iw i zel Washfc: mance is bright spot fe, (,.

Here's what "Crossroads" has: Britney in bra and panties, Britney in tank top and panties, lots of shots of Britney's belly and, yes, Britney in bed. Here's what "Crossroads" does not have: Cohesive direction from Tamra Davis, intelligent dialogue, a comprehensible plot. The movie begins promisingly enough, by introducing Spears' Lucy, a high-school senior dancing ecstatically around her bedroom, singing into a spoon Madonna playing at full blast. It's an endearing opening, humanizing the star before the film gives in and deifies her. Though Lucy is quickly proven to be sweet, beautiful and brainy, she does have problems.

Her mother (Kim Cattrall) took off years' ago. Her dad (Dan Aykroyd) doesn't approve of her musical dreams. And she and her best friends, pregnant Mimi (standout Taryn Manning) and snobby Kit (Zoe Saldana), have grown apart. Enter the Road Trip, that all-purpose solution to any post-adolescent problem. Having been promised a cross-country ride by hunky Ben (Anson Mount), Mimi convinces the girls to head west, to enter a music contest.

Simultaneously, Lucy plans to track down her errant mom. She's also looking for love, which comes courtesy of Ben. The big moment is handled discreetly, however, with a few kisses followed by a cutaway to crashing ocean waves. As long as the movie sticks to basics the road-trippers bonding, flirting and spontaneously breaking into song at every opportunity "Crossroads" rolls along amusingly. But then come the Issues, followed by the Lessons.

The girls (and, presumably, the audience) learn that alcohol is bad. Teenage pregnancy is to be avoided. And everyone else has problematic parents, too. By the third act, the movie is so packed with shallow melodrama, your eyes glaze over and you start counting Pepsi product placements. In fairness, it must be said that Britney's no Marian; she can do more than bare her body.

But as her cinemat-ically challenged idol, Madonna, can attest, a pop star only gets so many chances to prove herself onscreen and there's no avoiding the fact that Britney chose material that drags her dangerously down. Oops! E-mail: efyzawaol.com title role that you almost believe John's a real character But for sheer dramatic chutzpah, for promoting violence as a viable extension of every hard-pressed American's health-care coverage, "John is a major felony. On the face of it, "John is in the lineage of "Dog Day Afternoon" and "Mad City," in which other hostage-takers become instant folk heroes. But this gunman's motivation is a far, far nobler thing than wanting a sex-change operation for aboyfriend or his museum-guard job back John Q. is out to save his son's life, and he's willing to lay down his own to accomplish it.

At one point, he offers to release all his hostages if his son is brought to the emergency ward he has commandeered, and the heart surgeon (James Woods)' agrees to put John's heart in his son's chest. How can you call this man a criminal? The filmmakers are betting you cannot, and to make sure your heart's in the right place, they trot out enough callow, cliched villains to whip you into a fine froth. First, there's the ice-princess hospital administrator (Anne Heche): "People get sick, they 2 the reporter as much as the bad cop or the cold-hearted hospital administrator. Does every ill person in America deserve the best health care possible? I happen to believe so. Should John son be moved to the top of the organ recipient list perhaps causing another waiting patient's death because his father has a gun? I don't think so.

Ultimately, the film relies on your vicarious frustration with the system to justify John crime, and the deck is stacked so thoroughly, you have little choice. It may achieve its purpose there was audible weeping at my press screening but it's not honest, and it's certainly no solution. E-mail: jmathews edit. nydailynews.com die, that's the way it goes." Then, there's Tuck Lampley (Paul Johansson), the Ken-doll TV personality who latches on to the story and exploits it for a national audience: "This is my white Bronco," he tells an assistant. Finally, there's the police chief (Ray Liotta), a political lap dog for the mayor, who blunders onto the scene and orders John assassination.

"This has to be done now!" he tells the compassionate Lt. Grimes (Robert Duvall). The nasty stereotyping of the TV reporter is classic Hollywood cynicism. It's the media's attention to John gambit that makes him a national hero and undermines the police chiefs murderous solution. Yet Cassavetes wants you to hate 31 ro.