The Atlanta Constitution from Atlanta, Georgia • 12

LIVING B2 Monday, July 20. 1998 The Atlanta Journal-Constitution Don't sweep teens' beer party under the rug Mti Peach Buzz LISTEN UP DR. LAURA RICHARD ELDREDGE Cosmo guy already spoken for not the only one and I would feel taken advantage of without some compensation. Am I a creep? Not at all. Make sure that what your grandmother needs, and will need, can truly be taken care of by a nonprofessional.

Determine in advance with her son that he will cover medical expenses and care should they become required. You have a small child who needs your loving time and attention having you at home would be a plus all the way around, especially if grandma is able to play with the child, help you with her care and enjoy outings to the park, etc. I think it is fair to work out compensation with her son to make up for your lack of employment and ownership of your own home. Have your uncle pool the resources of the three children and 13 grandchildren to come up with the appropriate funds. Don't be embarrassed that your grandmother is going to be taken care of by a loving family.

What do you personally do when someone has hurt you? I know that I struggle with rage and feelings of vengeance and sometimes I end up doing bad things (gossiping, for example) a way of getting them back NewYork I wonder first if the situa- tion is truly what I perceive it to be; the first move is to make sure there isnt some other alternativ explanation sometimes there is! Next is to determine if this truly "personal." When the ceived hurt is from someone clos to me, I have to take into account a long positive history with that person. When it's from someone 1 1 don't know at all (or very little), I have to realize that it isn't "personal" at all it's an extension of their inadequacies and low character. With people who are just petty and mean, ignoring them is the best punishment Laura Schfessinger's column' 1 appears every Monday in Living. call-in radio talk show airs from noon to 3 p.m. Mondays-Fridays on WS6-AM (750).

Questions may be sent to her do The New York Times Syndication Sales 122 42nd New York NY Unpublished letters cannot be "'X" answered individually. "4 So how did James Roman of Buckhead snap up the title of Georgia's most eligible bachelor in Cosmopolitan's special issue "All About One word of advice dont ask his girlfriend. It seems Roman's modeling agency, Arlene Wilson, submitted his head shot to the mag, but not the news about his current steady. Not that the 25-year-old, a bartender at vr X- I would have to give up working outside of the home three days per week, which pays for our health insurance and a start for our 9-month-old daughter's college fund. We already have a house with little mortgage, so living at grandmother's rent-free is not an advantage.

My grandmother's son has asked us to move in with her and for me to care for her 20 hours a day, six days a week and he would pay for someone on the seventh day. My husband and I have agreed to do this if we are given a certain dollar amount of equity toward the purchase of her property for every year we care for her. If I were her only living relative, I would take care of her for nothing without a second thought, but I'm Mumbo Jumbo and a chiropractic student at -life University, is complaining about the exposure. So far, he's gotten about ISO letters, from women ages 16 to 30. "It's kind of weird," he says.

"Some have sent pictures. It's cute but I don't know how to react I'm too busy. My four sisters are actually having a ter time with this than I am. I'm not exactly walking around with a stack of magazines and autographing them for people." Roman's girlfriend, whom he declined to identify, is apparently taking all this in stride. "She scanned some of the letters last week and said, 'I can't believe my boyfriend is getting fan She's a very secure woman.

She's pursuing her Ph.D. in psychology." And, ladies, dont bother shimmying into your fave black micro- mini to try to score some free drinks at Mumbo Jumbo. Says the perpetually shy Roman: "I'm not into that at all. I'd rather be known for something I accomplish in the chiropractic field." DOONESBURY By Carry Trudeau My business partner and I have a pizza place and there are about 10 under-age employees with us. Generally one of us is always there to ensure good service and discourage employee theft.

One slow evening we left the store with our most trusted employee, a 21-year-old female. A few weeks later, we found out that this girl had closed the store and had given the crew beer from our tap. No one is allowed to give comps without our permission. They stayed and drank until they were plastered and drove home drunk. One of the older ones drove a 16-year-old employee home.

We are upset not only could they have killed themselves or someone else, but we could have lost our business and been personally sued because of their foolishness. My first reaction is to call their mothers and to fire them all, taking the stolen money out of their checks. My partner is more of a pushover and wanted to talk to them and get the money. She does not want us to contact the parents and feels it isn't our place. If it isn't our place then whose is it? I feel we owe it to the community! These kids aren't thinking twice about drinking and driving.

We have already let the 21-year-old girl go because she instigated the whole thing. But I -feel we've been too soft on the kids and they haven't learned their lesson. Am I too much of a 1 You may want to check with an attorney concerning the money issue I'm not sure you have the right simply to withhold income. However, it is important that the parents be made aware of their children's actions so that they can deal with them appropriately. You are lucky that nothing tragic occurred.

You might want -to consider hiring more from the willing pool of senior citizens, able handicapped, part-time single-parent adults, and so on. Frankly, I think you and your customers would be better served by having more responsible, adult co-workers around. Is it morally OK to ask for money to take care of my elderly grandmother? She has been wonderful to our entire family my whole life, but her three living children, and 13 capable grandchildren, choose not to give up anything in their lives to care for her daily needs although they help financially. irsjusrioaeAR-me treAse ftYourcFcamx. PNB-, BUT BB- 1 I KfsueeenDHex, I Till tmPTOASKYOU I I UA A CmCALQUtSSTON) THANKS ffSty PIBASURB.

IWTHMZMHS. HOWS tACSYf AHfCHANCf AfMAUBL. this is a umvese.BUt 1 PATBtV THANKSrVR. I 1 if UHArisrr, 5- WHERE I'M COMING FROM By Barbara Brandon ucurx. mme1 Elton John by Little Five i Points painter Jason Evers Johnson.

"People in the news fascinate and inspire me," Evers Johnson told us. "And Elton's outfit for his 50th birthday practically yelled out to be put on canvas." Big night The surprise hit at Friday night's multi-gallery "Numinous" exhibition? Candler Park artist Jeff Paclipan, whose mixed media pieces with handcrafted frames were being heavily scrutinized by those in attendence at Galerie Timothy Tew. "Originally, just couldn't; afford the framing," Paclipan told us. "Then I decided that the rough and uneven frames actually enhanced my work so I kept working with them." And just while we were chatting with Paclipan, two of his paintings sold. Said a clearly surprised Paclipan: "This is turning out to be quite an evening!" Redneck Games III You can almost hear those ice-cold cans of Bud cracking open as local folks begin their training.

Yep, it's time for the third annual Summer Redneck Games in Dublin. It all starts Aug. 7 with a David Allen Coe concert and the arrival of the propane torch, followed by the lighting of the ceremonial barbecue grill. I Displays of down-home skills begin Aug. 8, with competitions such as the mudpit belly flop, bobbing for pigs feet the hubcap hurl, a seed-spitting contest, a Dumpster dive and (dare we ask?) an armpit serenade.

Any similarities to those other Games that Georgia hosted this decade is completely intentional. For more info, call Dupri debut Tuesday morning when all the record stores open up, the world will hear what "life In 1472" sounds like. But because "1472" basically exists right here in Atlanta, local million-selling producer Jermaine Dupri (Kris Kross, Xscape, Usher) has decided to share his first album a bit early with his hometown. Tonight at midnight at Tower Records, Dupri will be signing his debut as a rapper, "Life In 1472," which features performances from Jay-Z, Marian Carey, Nas and Da Brat "I don't rap on any song by myself because I wanted it to be like a Quincy Jones kind of project," explains 25-year- old Dupri. "The focus is on the artists." Tew much i Gallery owner and and first-time ArtCare '98 auctioneers Timothy Tew and Blair Voltz probably felt a little like the Academy Awards host who will have the task of following Billy Crystal as Oscars emcee.

After all, the annual benefit for the AIDS Survival Project and the i AIDS Coalition of Northeast Georgia didn't have gallery owner and follically challenged perennial ArtCare host Bill Lowe at the helm this year. "I figured if Bill could make that kind of impact with one bald head, think what we could do -with two," a chrome-domed (via a rubber skull cap) Tew told the assembled formally attired crowd into the Swissdtel ballroom Saturday night Voltz, deciding against the shaved head route, opted for a black ostrich feather hat instead. Silent auction pieces that drew attention were the pop traits of Gianni Versace and 'Zorro' buckles his swash to the top BOX OFFICE 1 American theaters for Friday through Sunday as compiled by Exhibitor Relations. Final figures are expected today: I "The Mask of Zorro," $22.7 million. 2.

"Lethal Weapon 4," $21.2 million. 3. "Armageddon," $16 million. 4. "There's Something About Mary," $13 million.

5. "Dr. Dolittle," $8.8 million. 6. "Small Soldiers," $8.3 million.

7. "Mulan," $4.7 million. 8. "Madeline," $4.3 million. 9.

"The Truman Show," $2.2 million. 10. (tie) "Six Days, Seven Nights" and "The X-Files," $2 million each. "Dr.Dolittle"(No.5)and "Mulan" (No. 7) both passed the $100 million mark; "Dolittle" took in $8.8 million for a total of $104.6 million in its fourth week and "Mulan" had $4.7 million for a $101.1 million total in its fifth week.

They join "Armageddon," "The Truman Show," "Deep Impact" and "Godzilla" as $100 million-plus movies this summer. Here are estimated gross earnings for the top movies at North Antonio Banderas co-stars with Anthony Hopkins in this weekend's top film, "The Mask' of Zorro." 4 ASSOCIATED PRESS Los Angeles "The Mask of Zorro" debuted at No. 1, while the new comedy "There's Something About Mary" was swamped by action films in a crowded summer film field that saw two more entrants break the $100 million ticket sales mark, according to estimates Sunday. The season maintained a record-setting pace with weekend ticket sales up 11 percent over the same period last year on the strength of a wide range of films doing strong business, instead of one or two mega-hits. Slicing and dicing its way through the pack was "The Mask Of Zorro," the latest romance-adventure about the masked hero in Old California who has ridden through dozens of movies, serials and television series.

Starring Antonio Banderas, Anthony Hopkins and Catherine Zeta-Jones, "Zorro" made $22.7 million to lead the box office, getting a push from the best reviews since "The Truman Show." "Lethal Weapon 4," the latest installment of the Mel Gibson-Danny Glover franchise, picked up another $21.2 million for second place in its second week, put ting it on a pace to easily break $100 million this summer. Still soaring, despite horrible reviews, was "Armageddon," which grossed $16 million for third. "Something About Mary," starring Ben Stiller, Matt Dillon and Cameron Diaz opened in fourth place with $13 million. From the Farrelly brothers, it opened better than their last "Kingpin" in 1996, but didn't debut as well as their biggest hit "Dumb Dujnber" in 1994. Ul A II I'D) THE BUZZ FROM BEYOND ATLANTA Happy birthday Singer Vildd Carr is 57.

Director Atom Egoyan is 38. Actors Anthony Edwards and Campbell Scott are 36. Mandela throws a party for 2,000 For an 80-year-old newlywed, it was quite a weekend, and the partying to celebrate President Nelson Mandela's birthday was far from over Sunday night. Singers Stevie Wonder and Michael Jackson, actor Danny Glover and former Tanzanian President Julius Nyerere were reportedly among 2,000 on the guest list for Mandela's birthday banquet at an estate north of Johannesburg, South Africa. Mandela's birthday was Saturday, but there was some-; thing else to toast: Mandela's wedding on his birthday to Graca Machel, the widow of a Mozambican president.

i Paula Jones' new look, take 2 Paula Jones' profile is dwindling. The woman who sued Presl-: dent Clinton for sexual harassment underwent rhinoplasty at the Park Avenue office of plastic surgeon Dr. Thomas Loeb, two New York newspapers reported Sunday. The new nose is the latest incarnation for Jones, who appeared with a new hairstyle and wardrobe Jan. 17 at Clinton's deposition in her now-dismissed lawsuit Jones, 31, has said she would appeal.

The New York Post and Daily News said Jones was seen leaving Loeb's office Saturday morning with her nose heavily bandaged. It's unclear who paid for the $9,000 nose job. Contributing: Sonia Murray and news services. If you haw an Item, call 404-222-8503 or 404-614-2749, or fax 404-526-5509. E-mail: buzzajc.com For more juicy gossip and keen commentary, see what Vbcana has to soy on ojfc.com.

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