Harrisburg Telegraph from Harrisburg, Pennsylvania • Page 2

WEDNESDAY EYEJN'IXa n. A. GABLE, Wholesale and Retail Hardware, FOOT OF THIRD STREET, Opposite P. R. R.

Freight Office, HARRISBURG, Penna. 'AR IRON, Steel, Springs, Axles, full line of Carnage Bud Wagon Makers' Supplies, Tools, Anvils, Vises, Drills, Tire Benders and Shrinkers, Ferges, Eeilows, Screw Plates, Chucks, Stocks and Dies, a full stock of WheelSjShafts.PoleSjRirnsSpoKes, "Wagon and Buggy Bows, Bow Sockets, Horse Shoes, Horss Nails, Hasps, Files, Leather Dashes, Varnishes, colors; Hard Oil, Japan Shellac, White Lead, Oil and Mixed Paints, Gaas, Paint and Varnish Brushes, Glue, Building Hardware, Roof Paper, Sash Cord, Hay Carriers, LawnMowers, Cotton Duck Oil Cloth, Rubber Drill, Cloth, Head Lining, Fringe Thread, Tufting Twine, Seaming Cord, Cushion and Top Leather, Moss and Hair, Planing Mill Supplies, Doors, Sash, Blinds and Turned Porch'Posts. Telephone CalU533. CUMBERLAND VALLEY. The Carlisle Indian' Seficol will have an Excursion to Gettysburg on the 25th Chief of Police Duey, of Mechaniesburg, as brutally assaulted.

by a gang of ruffians Saturday night. John Whistler, of Plainfield, Cumberland county, died suddenly Sunday evening, aged 60 years. Jcseph Patterson is in jail at Chambcrs burg clrarged with the larceny cf brass from the Mont Alto. Iron' Company. Superintendent Shearer, of Carlisle, has been appointed an examiner at the State Xcrmal School, Slippery Keck, Butler county.

The examination commences en Mondav. June ISth. Mrs. Elizabeth. A.

Fleming, wife of the late William W. Fleming, died at the home of her son in law, Mr. Henry Strfck ler, in Greeneastle, Saturday night Mrs. Fleming had been an invalid icr the last twenty yrars. Mrs.

Westiiafer died at her home, Me chaniesburg. The dec eased had been a sufferer for quite a leng time. The funeral was held this afternocn. Mrs. tliza Benedict, widow of the late Daniel Benedict, died at.

her home near Pigeon Hill school house, near Chambers burg, after an illness of only a. few days cf the infirmities of old age and pneu at 10 o'clock last Friday morning. She was agetl 84 years. She leaves surviving her, her son, John D. Benedict, of Guilford township; D.

Mrs. William Ha rshman. Mrs. Rebecca Knepper. Mrs.

Isaac Kiddie5berger, John Burger and Miss Susie Benedict, all at home in Quincy township. S. M. Chronister died in Dillsburg, May 16th, aged 64 years. Deceased was a veteran of the rebellion, a member of the Two Hundred and Ninth Pennsylvania Volucteers.

A widow, Curtis and Frank, of 'this city; cf Pitt burg, and Mrs. Samuel Bentzel, of Mt. Holly, survive. With a revolver; Martin Trey Saturday night blew out the brains his brother in law, William. Collins, near Xewville, Cumberland unty.

He had been in the habit of abusing his wife, and Frey had often remonstrated with "him. Saturday night, hearing iha.t his sister was being ill treated, Frey went to the house of his brother in law. Frey and Collins occupy the same house near Newville, and as a result of frequent quarrels Avere on, bad terms with each other. It is said that Saturday Collins abused and bat his wife, who is Frews Frey took his sis ters part and tried to persuade her to leave her husband. This enraged Co'lins and later, it is said, ho met Frey and assaulted him with an axe.

Frey pulled out a revolver and shot Collins. Frey claims the shooting was in self cUtfense. He is in jail at Carlisle. Mrs. Barbara Helfrich, widow of Peter Helfrich, whese death occurred more than eleven years ago, died somewhat unexpectedly at her home.

Saturday afternoon. Mrs. Helfrich at the time of her death was one cf Cham bersburg's oldest citizen, she having attained an age of 85 years March 30th last. She was a native of Germany, having been bom in Bergeneau, Hesse Darmtadt, and cams to this place in 1842, when she married three days after her arrival here. She was a member of Corpus Christi Catholic Churc and John Shearer, a brother, Columbus.

Ind. John L. Peter and Jo eeph Schmidtt, grandsons, Chambersburg, eunive. A Safe I.lvcr Regulator. McNeil's Complexion Pills move the bowels gently and regulates the liver to perfection.

A healthy action of the liver results. No more headache or constipation. Forty little pills in a box, 10 cents. Most druggists sell them. Others win get them for you.

Sold at Clark's, 303 Broad street. McNeil's Cold Cure positively curea colds, 10c. may21 tc Our retail price is a fair sum for profit and to cover the expense of selling, added to the cost cf our pianos and organs. With high grade pianos and organs and consistent low prices the J. H.

Troup Music House have made their success. mavl9 tf Music for afternoon outdoor concerts should be something light and airy. RAILROAD WATCHES. 1 Crescent St. IX Silvcroid case Silver case, 3 ounce, Silver case, 4 ounce, Gold filled case, 10 carat, 20 year, Gold filled case, 14 carat, 25 year, JEWELER, 214 216 Market Street.

my 15 lm LOXDOX'S EAST EI Sl'J 45 22 45 23 25 22 65 26 85 Vanguard IX Silveroid case $24 15 Silver case. 3 ounce, 27 15 Silver case, 4 ounce, 27 95 Gold filled case, 10 carat, 20 year, 27 35 Gold filled case, 14 carat, 25 year, 31 55 Views Characteristic of Prevailing: Ijrnornnoe. From the Saturday Evening Post. Richard Whiteing, whose remarkable stories of life in the East End of London have made so marked an impresson upon the reading public, gained his knowledge of the subject by living among the very poor as one of them. Many of his experiences among the submerged tenth are even more interesting than those he has told in print.

Once, whiie talking with a grizzled old woman, who lived in the same tenement, he referred to the Queen. "Oh, ow I would like to be the Queen!" said the ancient dame. "Whv?" asked Mr. Whiteing. "It isn't because of her 'orses, because if I were Queen I wpuld ave a donkey cart with red wheels, and it isn't because of her band of musicians on horseback, which gees ahead of the 'orss guards, for I'd much rathor "ave a Hitalian with a 'and organ; but, just think, she wakes up at 3 o'clock in the mmoing and Avants a bite to eat she can touch a bell and 'ave beef and boiled cabbage right away!" A factory girl visited a collection of antique sculptures, and cn her return Mr.

Whiteing a.ked her: "How dd you like ie "Xone too much at first, sir, because nearly all of them were shamelessly dressed. That made me mad. until I thought that they wuz awfully poor in them days and didn't 'ave money to buy ciotnes witn. lhen, do vou know. I real had because there wasn't a single in the whole bloomin' lot of them what 'ad a bonnet to her Sliarciokiii I'ouncilmeii Resign.

Shamckin, May 23. There was a special session of Shamokin Council last night to declare vacant the seats of Thomas A. Holl, William Zimmerman and Edward The accused members saved council the task cf forcing them out by tendering their resignation which were promptly accepted. That of ilr. Zimmerman contained the following: "Believing the best interests of the borough will be secured by the avoidance of any further contention, and being desirous that I shall in no manner hinder legislation considering well for the municipality, I hereby resign and request immediate acceptance." Until late in the afternocn one or two of the convicted members were undecided whether to combat the action to dismis them, believing that if they voluntarily resigned it might tend to injure their chances in court to escape the pena'ty to which they may be subjected on account of the conviction in criminal court last Sunday morning.

AMUSEMENTS. Deshon Opera Company All this week Chimes of Normandy. night Said Pasha Thursday night Bohemian Girl night Olivette Saturday matinee Girofle Girolla Saturday night Iehon The merry and bright productions of the De hon Opera Company at the Grand Opera House this week are meeting with general favor. Last night "Fra was presented and was more than well received. Franklin Fox, as "Fra li avolo;" Claude Amsden, as "Beppo," and Julia Gilford, as "Zerlina," were deserving of special mention.

To night that famous work, "Chimes of Normandy," will be given by the full strength of the company. The specialties introduced between the acts Were of a high order and much appreciated by the audience. You Will Finl tlie A'ame Flaeher Nearly at the top of the list of artistic pianos. The reason is this: It is constructed of material of the finest quality and their scale is a marvel of mathematical calculating. The result of which is a very powerful, resonant tone.

Every part of the entire piano is made in their own factory, and made on the highest approval. Call at the J. H. Troup Mu ie House and inspect them. maylO tf There's no place in the house for a goat, unless it is the buttery.

The pipe organist seldom plays a piere without putting his foot in it. Plenty to Choose From in I NORMAL CONDITIONS. The Trainmen are Still Busy, However. The records in the trainmaster's office show that the freight movement over the Middle Division of the Pennsylvania has reached what is tenned the "normal condition." The rush season is about over and while the movement is not as heavy at present as during January, February and March, the number of cars handled daily is greater by about ten per cent, than the movement of May, 1890, The average number of cars passing Lewis town Junction daily is about 5,000. The bulk of the freight that is now passing over the road is coal, general merchandise and agricultural implements.

The demand for coal continues to be enormous, which shows that all the iron and other industrial plants in the East are running. The trainmen are not making as much extra time as they did three months ago, as weather conditions are more favorable for hauling longer trains. Seme of the trains over the Middle and Philadelphia Divisions are hauling from 60 to 70 loaded cars, an increase of from 10 to 15 during the winter months. Very few of the trainmen have been laid off and they are keeping about even with the month. On thePhiiadelphia.

Heading Rail wav there has been a considerable fall ins:" off of freight on the 11. P. Branch, especially in soft coal shipmmts from the George's Creek Division, here the miners have been on a strike for several months. On the Lebanon Yaliey Braneh the movement has also reached the normal stage. There is no rush at present, but the movement is very satisfactory and is being handled with COXDICTOR Bl'SO DEAD Xever Recovered From the Stroke of Apolpexy Unstained Sear lewistowu.

Conductor John M. Bush, one of the felt i best known citizens of Altocna, and hav ing many friends here, Saturday even ing of apoplexy at his home, 1214 inira avenue. It will be remembered that he was stricken Saturday, May 5th, while taking a. freight train to Harrisburg. He was removed from the train unconscious at Lewistcwn.

He never regained consciousness. Deceased was born in Adams county, February 24th, 1847. He went to Al toona thirty four years ago and entered the employ of the Pennsylvania Rail read company' as a brakeman on the Midd.e division. He had been in its employ ever since and at the time of his death was the oldest freight conductor running on the Middle division. He served throughout the Civil War as a driver, being too young to enlist Mr.

Buih was married in 1869, at Mif flintown, to Miss Ellie Hackenberg, who with these children: Charles W. and II. of Altoona, and Mrs. V. M.

Valentine, of Allegheny. He was a member of the First United Brethren Church, Pride of Mountain City Council, No. 472, Junior Order United American Mechanics, the Order of Railway Conductors and the Pennsylvania Railroad Relief Association. Tl.VEL I'MSER EAST RIVER Important Project Likely to be Brought About. Charles E.

Pugh, second vice president of "the Pennsylvania Railroad, has made an inspection of the Long Island Railroad and he says that the property was found to be in good condition. "With regard to the changes and improvements in terminals and yards," says Mr. Pugh, "1 cannot speak at present, for Brooklyn is a place man must study before lie can speak on such important features. I will say, however, that the Pennsylvania Railroad will welcome any plan that will put a hole under the East River and connect Brooklyn with Manhattan. The unnel to Manhattan is one of President Baldwin's favorite projects, lie is enthusiastic about it." MOSSTER LOCOMOTIVES.

This week the Rock Is'and will receive six monster engines from the Baldwin Works. These engines will be the first delivered of twenty two ordered several months ago. They will be pressed into the fast passenger and freight service between Chicago and Omaha, and Chicago and Kansas City. Each of the "passengers" will enter the service guaranteed to haul fourteen heavy coaches at the rate of fifty miles an hour. Each of the engines, with tender, is said to "tin the beam" at about pounds.

All of them are of the compound, ten wheel type. The drive wheels measure seventy five Furniture, Carpets and Refrigerators There is a satisfaction in buving: where the assortments arp laro nH wdHH The many styles and designs give your tastesjand fancies full scope. That is one I iv.uou.1 whv. many liKtr iu ueai witn ub. mey ait aiways sure 10 una wnat pleases 7t Tnnvr; tnem.

Prices always favor the customer and our guarantee is behind every sale. Quick selling keeps the newest in all lines coming and going. We Give Trading Stamps. 109 111 Market Street. Opposite Board of Trade Building.

THE HAEKISBUEG TELE Git API! AY lJOO. Railroaders' Column. THE CIGAR TRAIN. It Wan ot the Great Success Expetecl Baltimore, May 23. An.

official trial trip of the Adams air splitting train on the Baltimore Ohio Railroad, between this city and Washington yesterday, was not success so far as speed was On the train from Washington to Baltimore, the cigar shaped train of one car and fiv passeng.r coach made the trip of 40 miles in 40 minutes and 15 seconds. The same locomotive that drew the train on this trial run had earlier in the day taken a train of three regular cars from Baltimore to Washington, 40 miles, in 38 minutes. The engineer said last niglvc that he believed in another trial with the cigar shaped train he could make the 40 miles in five minutes' less time. Mr. Adams, the inventor of "Air Splitter," has been hoping to make a speed of 100 miles an hour.

inches over tires and the cylinders are fifteen and one half inches by twenty eight inches. From the pilot to the rear draw bar eaeh engine measures sixty four foet. Each tender has a capacity of 6,000 gallons of water and ten tons cf coal. The locomotives are equipped with all modern safety appliances, including headlights that will reveal objects a mile from an Where the Steam does, When'one looks at the huge ports which admit steam to the big express engines used these days, he naturally enough wonders how steam pressure can be kept up in the boiler when the throttle is wide open. It looks like trying to fill a barrel that has no bottom, but somehow, by means of the enormous heating surface and the great space for water and steam they manage to keep up the pressure, but it is no easy task for the fireman.

I. R. It. Relief The monthly report of the Employes' Relief fund for the Pennsylvania Railroad Company's lines east of Pittsburg and Erie shows that the payments of benefits to its members and the families of deceased members for the month of April 1900, amounted to $86,118.80, of which $40, 050 were on account of death, and $46, 06S.S0 on account of disablement by sickness and accident. The payments thus far are stated have amounted in the aggregate to $7,614,062.43, of which $3, 262,956.03 were on account of death of members, and 4,351,106.40 on account of disablement.

Will be Heavy I.oensotlvc The thirty new consolidated freight engines for the Southern Railroad which are to be built at the Pittsburg Locomotive Works, will be heavy machines Each engine will weigh in working order 151.500 pounds, so that for thirty engines 4,545, 000 pounds of steel and iron will be required. The specifications call for radial stay boilers, extended wagon top, 61 inches at the smallest ring, working pressure 200 pounds, 271 tubes, cylinders 21x 28 inches. The Southern has also let a contract to the Richmond works for ten heavy fast express1 engines, which will weigh pounds each. So Conclusions Konctied. The story about the Pennsylvania Railroad having taken up the nickel steel rails laid on the Horseshoe Curve because of their excessive hardness destroying friction and lessening the tractive power of the engines is emphatically denied by the officias of the company.

They say that a nickel 'steel rail was taken up here and there and an ordinary rail put in, but this was dene so as to get a fairer practical test to determine the merits of the nickel steel rail as compared with the soft steel rail under the same conditions of wear. The officials of the road say they do net. expect to reach any conclusion regarding the merits or demerits of the nickel steel rails for some time to coma. V. ES.

H. nrtasre Plan. The Federal Motor Vehicle Company, whos? charter was fiied in New Jersey, is connected with ths Pennsylvania scheme of transferring its terminals to Long Island. The new comranv, it is a.nnounc ed, will control the street transportation trom Brooklyn and Long Island points to New York city. The an incudes cartage to the proposed terminal points.

The capital stock of the Federal Motor Vehicle Company is $100,000. but it is understood that this amount will be increased to $5, 000,000. The plan cf the immediate control of cartage, facilities by a railroad never has been tried to any extent by railroads in this country, although it is said to be a success in England and Canada. Illegal Train Riders. Charles Neeter, George Fells.

Fred. Beane and John Kaufman, all of this city, were arrested yesterday by Detectives Michael, Kennedy andMuIvaney, of the Pennsylvania Railroad police force, for illegal car riding. They were taken before Alderman Spa yd and sent to jail for ten days each in default of payment of the usual tines. Phoenix to Builil. The Reading Railway has awarded ths contract for an overhead highway bridge over its new freight yard at.

Rutherford, on the Lebanon Valley Branch, to the Phoenix Bridge Company. The bridge ill be a metal plate girder bridge of two spans, with a total length of 121 feet, and ill be supported upon stens masonry. Inspeelel Iev5sow nivisTon. Superintendent Myers. Division Engineer MacArthur.

Passenger Trainmaster Moore and Freight Trainmaster Madden left this morning on a special car for Lewistown, where they made an inspection of the Lewistown Sunbury Division of the Pennsylvania Railroad. Mr. Myers is still acting as superintendent of that division, no successor to Mr. Hutchinson having been announced. Will 1 Change.

An astute railroad reporter in Harrisburg had another ''dream" this morning when he wrote that "there will be a number of changes among the officials at the Union Station before the close of the month." The item was referred to several of the leading officials and one of them said that lie thought one or two trackmen would be changed in a few days. KaiIron8 JVoies. The Americans employed as track repairmen on the Lloydville division of the Pennsylvania, Northwestern Railroad struck recently for more wages and as a result a force of Italians has been hired in their stead. There are 210 trains out and 213 into the Reading Terminal station, Philadel phia, daily under the new schedule, an increase of 11 out and 12 in. Some malleable iron ournel boxes, which are being used on the Lake Shore, are giving good results.

Chicago lines to the Northwest have withdrawn all second class tickets, and it is believed that eventually all Western lines will follow7 shit. The Union Pacitis is having sixty compound engines built by the Baldwin Locomotive Works. The Lehigh Valley has taken $30,000 worth of stock of the Buffalo Exposition. The Mt. Carmel Board of Trade is getting up a petition to present to the Philadelphia.

Reading Railway to change the name of Alaska Station to Mt. Carmel Howard Stock, of Sunbury, baggage master ori Lewistown passenger train, has been transferred to the Milllroy branch. He will move his family to Lewistown. On the 17th inst. there were, 70 car loads of freight shipped from Annvillo over the Philadelphia, Reading Railway.

Tli iU beats all previous records at that point. About 25 carloads of emigrants have passed through the city since Sunday for their new home? in the far West. A number of Pennsylvania Railroad car repairmen have been transferred from the lower shop's to the new shops at Luck A large number of new ties are being laid in the local yards. Most of tho men on the relief list at present are suffering from severe colds and The receipts from Maelay Street Star tion are cm the increase. Many passengers for Cove and other summer resorts where railroad men have cottages board the trains at that point.

William, Nace, former clerk at i 3 We have been telling you for some time that there was never in our history a greater display of handsome Mattings and Carpets than is now shown on the second floor. The rich designs from the Japanese looms give to mattings a popularity that they did not have a few years ago. There is nothing in the whole range of floor coverings more desirable or more artistic in effect. 7 Carpets, Carpets, Carpets are also here in great variety and for every purse. There are some beautiful patterns and it is possible here to please every taste in Velvets, Brussels and Ingrains.

GoCarts and Baby Carriages i in pleasing array. We show everything new in go carts and carriages for the babies, adjustable backs, rubber tires, thoroughly seasoned reed, patent brakes and all the safety devices pretty parasols. Refrigerate rs the good kind the kind that will stand inspection and service the kind that economize ice and preserve food in a healthful way no drip pans, but a refrigerator and water cooler combined. $12.00 up. Some People Stand in Their Own Light fingers' end.

There's not another such place in can furnish the home complete at bottom rock the place of cash. Pennsylvania Railroad Station at Wrightsville, has accepted a position in the Pennsylvania Railroad roundhouse, this city. SMELLSVILLE ShelJsville, May 23. We had a splendid rain on Saturday. William Umaeht and wife, of Palmyra, passed through town on Sunday.

11. A. L'oyer. of Palmyra, visited his parents, Mr. D.

A. Boyer and family. Quite a number of our citizens attended Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show. Mr. Harry Kapp, residing in Mauada Valley, offers his valuable farm at private saie.

lei iris reasonable. Mr. Kapp has a lucrative position at Lykens and desires to there. Miss Annie Shaffner, of Hanoverdale, is i visiting Mr. Danieb'BoSton and family.

Mr. ton D.sugner has secured a position with Mr. J. M. Rauch as a painter and at this writing they have I plenty ot work.

I Miss Malinda Wagner, Sarah Wagner I and the daughter of Mr. C. W. Leaman, i Miss Edith Leaman, of Hanoverdale, visited R. W.

Wagner and family on Sunday. Quite a number of our young Americans 1 intend to celebrate Ascension day at the dams fishing. The Sunday school scholars of Shell's Church are commencing to rehearse their i music and speeches to hold their annual Children's Day services in the near fu ture. Mr. Early Kern and his lady friend, of Hummelstown, passed through tpwn on Sunday evening.

William Houck, a farmer west of having a well dug the front of hs barn. Mr. Heck, of Penbrook, is manager of the dirlling gang. Our County Supeiinteiilent, II. V.

B. Garver, will hold his annual examination cn Ascension Day in the public school building, and at this writing a large class of applicants is expected. W. J. He trick is having a new pump erected by our pumpmaker, E.

E. Weaver. Mr. G. T.

Boyer made a business trip to Palmyra on Saturday. The public sale of Harry Hetrick was well attended on Thursday and the articles brought fair prices. The carriage builders are the men who make money. The young Americas are getting new buggies. And when a new buggy then a.

penny cigar, then get up. When sneak thief visits the photographers pictures are taken in a group. The weather hen presumably thrives best in fowl weather. EUM0RQU3. You don't want the waiter to serve vou 4a "apple pie order" when you call for peach or pumpkin.

Philadelphia Bulletin. Meu are made or marred by their ups and downs, but the waiter always waxes prosperous on his tips. Boston Transcript. Hl Timed Departure. The One.

"Yes, sir, he died owing nobody." The Other "What an unfortunate time to expire." Indianapolis Press. Mr. E. Conomy "What do you mean by buying all these things?" Mrs. E.

Conomy "Don't get excited, dear; I didn't buy them. I had them charged." Philadelphia Record. Facetious Guest "I can tell from your looks that you believe in spiritualism. Am I right?" Solemn Waiter "Well, I do have some faith in table tipping." Indianapolis Journal. Her Natural Affliction.

"What's the matter with the Albino girl to day?" asked the fat ladj "Oh, I suppose it's her old trouble," replied the tattooed girl. "Pink eye." Philadelphia Bulletin. "Oh, but I got good and angry last nigiit," said Beechwood to Homewood. "I can believe only part of that statement." "What deftyou mean?" "lean believe that 3 ou got angry." Pittsburgh Telegraph. Infallible Method.

They had been discussing methods of ascertaining character. "I can tell you how to find a man out," volunteered one who had not spoken. "How'?" "Go to his home when he is away." Pittsburgh Chronicle Telegraph. "Mary," said the father, "I hear that that young man calling on you gambles." "Why, pa," she retorted, "I guess you were at the door and heard him betting that I couldn't keep from screaming if he kissed me. But, pa, I didn't scream, and he paid the bet." Philadelphia Item.

Blond "Wlsrs of Romans. Teutonic peasants were the providers of blond hair for rich Roman princesses, who loved the contrast of its flaxen hue with their black eyes. They even had morning wigs, small and tightly curled, of any color, and kept the beautiful fair ones to wear when receiving their admirers in the evening. Parlor Softs from $15.00 to $135.09. Bedroom Suits from $19.75 to $100.00.

You can buy two, three or more pieces and on guarantee. The new Go Carts and Baby Coaches are beauties. when the opportunity for self help is right at their all Harrisburg where you prices and let credit take Home Furnishers, 28 South Second Street. TESTED BY TRIFLES. Man Makes an Idiot of Himself When lie Upsets a Small Bottle' of Ink.

Flies are great tests of character, Bon. A man may be cool as an iceberg under extraordinary circumstances of danger or times of intense excitement; he may be calm when, at onother man's order, he is facing a six gun battery and getting ready to try if he can push a bayonet through a cannoneer before the gunner shoves eight pounds of assorted ironmongery through him; he may assume command and act nobly and quietly when the ship is sinking; he may preserve an even mind when the hotel is on fire; he may even speak grammatically wiien the ghost enters his room at midnight. But let that man upset a very small inkstand, says Robert J. Burdette in the Los Angeles Times, with only very little ink in it, on his desk. He upsets his chair on the office cat as he leaps to his feet with a howl like a wild Indian or a baseball coach; he makes a desperate grab at the inkstand and swoops it half way across the desk before he sweeps it off into an open drawer full of unanswered letters; then he claws after his papers and drags them through a little puddle of ink that wasn't doing a bit of harm before he mopped it zigzag and crooked all over everything with, his white handkerchief; and finally, after he has smeared the top of his desk, his hands and his gray pantaloons with ink, he discovers that at the first dash he had knocked a much larger bottle of red ink clear off tho desk on to the floor, where it has lain, draining its crimson life away I in the very heart of the lightest figure on a blue and white carpet.

Then he says things at the flies of life, and wonders why a man always makes an idiot of himself when he upsets a little bottle of ink. And he may keep on wondering. Because he will never know why. Nobody knows. Ue just does it; that is all.

A Good Matrimonial Standard. If men judged women by the way they treat their mothers there would be fewer of those marriages that lead to divorce. Chicago Democrat. fJMlllliSSl 1 lit We make a specialty of Rockers for parlor or porch every design ran ging in prfce from $1.50 to $20.00. The latest in Flemish oak is a dream.

Call and look them over. Refrigerators, $8.00 to $18.00. Ice Chests, $4.95 to $10.75. Piano and Furniture 32 40PEN EVENINGS. ouse..