Chicago Tribune from Chicago, Illinois • 28

2 Section a uueago inoune, riiuay, ouno taa T7T IMovios Tower Ticker By Aaron Gold General mediocrity, sorry story mar 'Moonraker 7 ka I. -V A a TRIBUNE MINI-REVIEW: Cheetey "MOONRAKER" Dtroctatf by Lawla Olrbart: acrtanplay by Chriatophar Wood) photographM by Jaan Toumlar; aditaa by John Clans muale by John Barry; producad by Albart R. Broccoli; Unltad Artlata ratoaaa al lha Chicago, McClurg Court, and outlying thaalara. naiad PQ. THE CAST NOT, EVEN THE sleaziest or trashy novelists could have come up with a book filled with more tales of sex, drugs, beatings, infidelity, bisexuality.

mate-swapping, and pure hedonism than Tony Sanches does in his new book, "Up and Down With the Rolling Stones." It's a brutally explicit, 304-page account of his eight years as a paid companion dope procurer (and just about anything else) for the Rolling Stones, a band affectionately called the bad boys of rock 'n' roll. William Morrow is publishing the book in August (with candid photos) in which Sanchez spares no one' least of all himself, and certainly not Brian Jones, Keith Richard. Mick and Blanca Jagger, John Lennon, Marianne or Anita PaUenberg. It details the band'i shrinking entourage as friends, lovers, and employes overdose on drugs and die. And the author describes life at the Richards', with strung-out nannies, blackmailing cooks, dope stashed in kids' toys, and Jamaa a1'' Rooar Moora Holly ftnfflltrM i loia China Drai- Jawa.

Corrino Dufour. Michaal Lonadala Klal Cnnnm Clary Bfnard Laa Oaamond Llawalyn Loll Maxwall Lois Chiles and Roger Moore (as James Bond) find themselves in a zero-gravity situation in a scene from "Moonraker." THE MOST HONEST thing I can say about the James Bond series of films Is that I haven't really enjoyed one since Sean Connery stopped playing agent 007. That's eight years and four films ago. Connery's replacements have been embarrassing (model George Lazenby in "On Her Majesty's Secret and merely acceptable (Roger Moore in now his fourth Bond film, In the beginning of the Bond series, before they were thought of as a series, each film was a good action picture with a colorful, entertaining hero. Today, they come off as conglomerate business enterprises rather than movies.

How else does one explain the intrusive commercial plugs in "Moonraker" for Christian Dior perfume, British Airways, Bollinger champagne, Glaston boats, and Seiko watches? Truly, money derived from these plugs can't be worth the loss of story continuity when the products are flashed in front of the camera. Someone is being awfully cheap about the plugs, which borders on incredibility because the James Bond series is one of the surest moneymakers in the film business. Maybe the producers of "Moonraker" are blind to story construction? That certainly would explain -the film's failure. AFTER A TRULY exciting opening sequence a fight between Bond and a thug as they free-fall from an airplane "Moonraker" degenerates into a tired yarn about a modern-day Hitler who wants to create a super race in space after spraying the Earth with poison gas. French actor Michael Lonsdale plays the evil billionaire Hugo Drax, and, frankly, Lonsdale is a big bore.

He looks as though he has just iranuc iitgnis owiitei-land for Dracula-like blood transfusions to alleviate drug addiction. Sanchez captures the pits and the peaks of the Stones' career during those eight years in what has been dubbed an "orgedy," a combination orgy and tragedy. If you can't wait for the book Playboy will have excerpts, from it in its August issue. MOST OF THE coun-try's film critics went after Farrah Fawcett-Majors with crowbars and hatchets after seeing her film debut last year in "Somebody Killed Her Husband." Many of them even predicted that her Bond's principal weapon this time is a dart gun concealed in a watch. Big deal.

He also uses a boat that can travel on land. But when the boat takes a spin around St. Mark's Square in Venice, the stunt is simply vulgar. Also annoying is the film's preference for bigness rather than a taut story. "Moonraker" features a series of exotic locations Guatemala, Brazil, a chateau in France but forgets to place any importance on script.

And the Aim's outer space special effects seem rather tame when compared to the hardware of "Star Wars." "Moonraker" may do well at the box office, but what people will be buying is not a good movie, but nostalgia for the time when the James Bond films guaranteed good stories and not just a catalog of James Bond memorabilia. Gene Siskel Gene Siskel regularly reviews the movie scene at and 10 p.m. on Channel 2 News. the same set of brutal braces, but his character has been turned Into a big pussycat: "Jaws" walks around the various locations smiling. It looks as though Richard Kiel is trying to act.

He can't. AFTER THE VILLAIN, the next most Impor- tant elements of a Bond picture are the women and the gadgets. "Moonraker" comes up short on both counts. The women look as though they stepped out of one of those kinky lingerie ads featuring bored women staring into space. Lois Chiles, Roger Moore's principal love Interest in the picture, plays an American agent assigned to track down Hugo Drax.

The script gives Chiles nothing to do. Her brightest moment comes when she appears in Venice in a beautiful shirtwaist dress flecked with Lurex, And that's a pity, because Chiles proved she could act when she played Jordan Baker in the Robert Redford version of "The Great Gatsby." As for the gadgets, they're nothing special. been sucked dry by a vampire. His only slightly menacing characteristic is a goatee that makes him look like he spends most of his time in a dirty book store. He might make a credible henchman, but as the major villain Lonsdale is a flop.

And that's an Important flop, because 007 and his villain are the two most important characters in a Bond film. To watch "Moonraker" is to long for the good old days when James Bond's enemies stroked white cats, threw lethal derbies, fed people to sharks, aimed lasers at groins, and carried poison-tipped knives in their shoes. By comparison, the evil Hugo Drax is a wimp. In an' attempt to bolster an obviously weak villain, "Moonraker" gives Drax a familiar henchman, a giant nicknamed "Jaws" (7 foot 2 inch Richard Kiel, who played the same character in the last Bond picture). The last time we met "Jaws" he was a rousing villain with a steel vice for a mouth.

This time he has Farrart Fawcett-Majors film career was finished. Judging by the preview audience's reaction to her new film, "Sunburn," at the Lincoln Village Theater, they just may change their minds. The theater was filled with laughter from start to finish, with Farrah, Charles Grodin, Joan Collins, and i When you purchase any of these dinners: iTTnJJlllJI Super Sirloin Steak Extra-Cut Rib Eye Steak Steak Shrimp Prime Rib (Regular Cut) Prime Rib (King-Size Cut) T-Bone Steak Art Carney getting applause at the end of many of their scenes. Farrah will be here at the end of July to hype the film that's set to open in late August. TICKER TOUTING: Agostino's restaurant has come up with four low-calorie pasta dishes that are so good It's difficult to imagine that the pasta is made of artichoke flour "Martha," a biography of the late Martha Mitchell by Winzola McClendon, paints a sad, rough; yet sensitive portrait of the wife of one-time Atty.

Gen. John Mitchell. STEVE ALLEN'S new song, "Three Mile Island" was a big hit at Wednesday's Big Laff-Off at the Park West that was taped for a pay-TV special. All five competing comics were funny, but Jerry Dye placed first, winning $2,000, a Park West booking, and a place in the national Big Laff-Off competition. And Jam Productions is trying to set an August Park West date for comic Elaine Booslcr, one of the contest judges, who did an impromptu eight minutes and devastated the audience.

"Rock and Roll High School" was such a big hit last week in Friday and Saturday midnight showings that it's being repeated this weekend at the 400, Three Penny, Wilmette, Studio 11 in Westmont, and Homewood theaters, ABC-TV WAS FORCED to change the title of Lisa Hartman's first TV special from "Hot Stuff" to "The Lisa Hartman Show" because of a conflict with the Donna Summer single of the same name. The show airs-Saturday evening. L'Escargot wants to help us out of the midyear doldrums with a special Mid-Year New Year's Eye, celebration dinner Friday and Saturday. TICKER BITS: Rod McKuen bought a first edition of Walt Whitman's "Leaves of Grass" from Marshall Field Co. for $6,500.

Congratulations to lawyer Mary 1 Oppenheim, who'll receive the Torch of Learning Award from the American Friends to the Hebrew University Monday at a luncheon in the Covenant Club. WLUP deejay Steve Dahl will debut his new band, Teen-age Radiation, July 4 at the Winnebago Fair Grounds near Rockford; Cheap Trick is the headliner. Paul Lipin atid his Lynn, celebrated their wedding anniversary at the Pump Room. Hold the pickles, hold the lotus: In United Artists' satirical "Americathon" film, set in 1998, the Chinese operate an international chain of fast-food restaurants called Chiang Kai Chef! Treat yourself and we'll treat each of your kids under 12 to a FREE Square Shooter hamburger and French Fries. And enjoy free refills on soft drinks, coffee and iced tea.

Bring the whole family to and save. fwm fy' -fW all day from Monday-Saturday ffJJW June 22 thru July 8. anaauaaybunaoy. HELD OVER At'" 0 tt't'l(l' i Evarybodf's doing Itl Learn front th PROFESSIONALS. Wi cm luck inyoni to enjoy it.

Special introductory offer without further obligation FIRST 100 NEW STUDENTS OVER 31 ONLY. aach location 13 'Uu'Vv'h ii I'ondiTosa nar you. Check your telephone tliivclory. 4 lessons $13.50 (30 mmuMi aachl wt p. I II At Participating Steakhouses 1 lllkl Fred AMUSEMENTS AMUSEMENTS AMUSEMENTS Aotairc WBB A 1 FRANCHISE WW .1 DANCE STUDIOS Fir fall Jiliits HONE licitlu must iiImii I t.

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