Panama City News-Herald from Panama City, Florida on June 23, 1974 · Page 78
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Panama City News-Herald from Panama City, Florida · Page 78

Panama City, Florida
Issue Date:
Sunday, June 23, 1974
Page 78
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'•What in the W>rkl! BOB ft CAROL one VAMIUMS now ntoy w mean n Carol Lawrence tries hard to make her marriage work, though she admits it is difficult—particularly for husbands and wives who work together. Looking back on the crises she and Robert Goulet have surmounted, she wonders how they've managed to stay together for nearly 11 years. Show-business marriages "take a real effort to make them work. And if they're not the source of tremendous gratification, the tensions and the pressures make it appealing simply to walk out." The reason they've stayed together, undoubtedly, has something to do with the way Carol feels about her husband: "That man of mine makes living a challenge. He can be darling, he's got a wild sense of humor. But he is stubborn! And what a temper!" When you're taking that auto trip this summer and your spouse, sitting beside you with a road map, tells you to "turn left—I mean right," count to ten. Then imagine what it would be like trying to drive if you didn't have any road map at all. Back in 1909, a company called Rand McNally got the idea of taking pictures of the roads and drawing arrows on the pictures to show which way to turn. Four pictures and 60-some words got you through about three miles of driving. The first photograph in each set marked a starting point at which the driver set the car odometer at zero and then began looking for landmarks. 'Turn left at the red-brick school," or "Turn south and leave the wires," were typical instructions. When the little red schoolhouse was replaced, or die telephone company strung some new wires, imagine the number of lost travelers who turned up at the friendly neighborhood farmhouse! JUSTICE DOUGLAS The waiter aaw double QUOTE: Justice William O. Douglas: "A gentleman stopped me on 56th Street near Park Avenue, called me by name, and said he had admired me for years because once as a waiter he had served me at a restaurant where I drank in rapid succession four double vodkas. 'What a man,' he said. 'If it had happened to me, I'd have been under the table.' I never told him it must have been Spencer Tracy Casey Stengel or Spencer Tracy (for whom I'm often mistaken), because it probably was not. There doubtless is still another understudy for me in Manhattan on the alcoholic side." From "Go East, Young Man," by Justice William O. Douglas (Random House, $10). UNQUOTE. ANNIVERSARIES: The assassination of Archduke Ferdinand of Austria— the event that started World War I— took place 60 years ago Friday. BIRTHDAYS (all Cancer): Sunday- William P. Rogers 61. Monday -Phil Harris 68; Norman Cousins 59; Jack Dempsey 79. Tuesday — Peter Lind Hayes 59; June Lockhart 49; Willis Reed 32. Wednesday -Eleanor Parker 52; Anna Moffo 39. Thursday -Gary Crosby 41. Friday -Richard Rogers 72. Saturday - Harmon Killebrew 38; Stokely Carmichael 33. BIRTHDAY PEOPLE: Peter Lind Hayes and June Lockhart ARMOUR'S ARMOURY By Richard Armour ' FLESH POT I've seen my wife put on her girdle, A sight that makes my bloodstream curdle. She tugs, she twists, she strains, she wiggles; Absurd it is, but gets no giggles. At last it's on-that is, she's in it. So tight it fits, no need to pin it. Her shape, there can be little doubt of it, Is better when she's in than out of it And yet beneath, although unwanted, The bulgy flesh remains undaunted. Yes, though it's squeezed and lowered, lifted, It's all still there, just slightly shifted. GAME ANALYSIS I know what's wrong with my golf And I willingly admit it: I'm standing too close to the ball After I hit it -Georgie Starbuck Gdbraith Inflation allows you to live in a more expensive neighborhood without even mooing. —Conrad FtoreUo My wife went on a diet, and to give her strength, I hung a beautiful, expensive size-12 gown on the refrigerator door. And it did give her strength. She ate it —Robert Orben A college student called home late at night. When his father answered the phone, the boy said: "Hi, Dad. Did I wake you up?" "No," the father replied. "Do you want to call back later?" —Lane OUnghouse THROUGH A CHILD'S EYES Kids see life differently. Send original contributions to "Child," Family Weekly. 641 Lexington Ave., N.Y., N.Y. "10022. $10 It used-none returned. During a tour of the Andrew Wyeth art exhibit, our 12-year- old son commented that the artist didn't always fill all the canvas. Our eight-year-old daughter replied seriously, "Maybe he had to hand it in before he was finished!" —Mrs. John Mueller Novato, Calif. My neighbor had been teaching her three-year-old son some manners. When she told him to put away his toys, he replied, "No thank you." -Sheila Brandt TUusviUe, Fla. By Frank Baginski LITTLE EMILY "Whafa wrong with buying this cat as an kwestonsnt? Mr. Wicker guar, antead ma it would Dfoduce) dhfi- •wewn^v^n weeds' wvvn> awv^•^•w^e^p^p «wi dsnds at least three times a year!" FAMILY WEEKLY, June 23,1974 • 23

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