Tampa Bay Times from St. Petersburg, Florida • 43

i Ann Landers, 3-D i Movies, 5-D i Television, 7-D i Comics, 8-0 3M section TUESDAY, JANUARY 26, 1988 ST. PETERSBURG TIMES BORROWING A PAGE FROM THE HITE REPORT What bay area women say In December, we asked women readers to comment on their love lives. The survey featured five questions taken verbatim from the recently published Shere Hite report, Women and Love, in which women reported disillusionment and dissatisfaction in their relationships with men. We wondered: What was going on between women and men in the bay area? Are women here as unhappy as those who responded to Hite's report? If so, why? If not, why not? In this first of two parts.we report on the 141 respondents' answers to the first three survey questions. about their love lives 'en sense a change Tl Jrr in the air as we go back to school, start or continue our careers and at least one is being threatened.

He tionally dependent. Women tend to credit themselves with more openness and see themselves as nurturers. They see their husbands as the ones who most often erect the walls. In communication and general satisfaction with the relationship, non-married couples fare better than married couples in this survey. Newlyweds and people in shorter-term relationships generally have happier news to report.

In their responses, many women speculate on the reasons for problems in relationships. They point out that men and women are raised with different role models. These roles easily conflict because the glorification of machismo and the fear of showing weakness are barriers to sensitivity, open ex pression of emotions and gut-level sharing. A 26-year-old homemaker, married twice, writes: "They don't want to be vulnerable. It's too bad that boys are trained to be tough and monetarily successful, and girls are trained to be pretty and giving.

It's so hard to be a complete person that way. It's hard for traditional women to be successful and traditional men to give love." But many women also say they believe the traditionally male role and the traditionally female role are becoming outdated, soon to be replaced by new standards which are a mixing and a melding of gender-linked traits. Men will adopt some softer, more nurturing aspects; women, as they take on more active roles outside the home, will become more independent and assertive. Generally, the responses to this survey would suggest that the more fluid the male-female roles, the better the relationship. The more easily men and women step out of their gender-labeled boxes, the more respect they have for each other's strengths and weaknesses, the less they worry about what's male-like and what's female-like, the more likely they are to find harmony.

Please see LOVE 2-D By DIANE MASON Timet Staff Writer 1 Time art JOE T0NELLI just doesn't understand why we're doing what we are. Isn 't being dominated and kept alone and lonely at home enough anymore? No, it isn and for the few, like me, that are changing and evolving away from the men we still love too much to give up entirely on, it's a painful and sometimes confusing life. But I don 't write this for pity, only understanding, and perhaps one more voice on the wind will help a man and a woman better understand each other. Then again, maybe not, but you've got to keep trying, because to some of us, men are too good to give up entire- iy. If there is one letter that captures the thoughts and feelings of the 141 women who responded to our survey, this one is it.

These comments were written by a 32-year-old woman, married 15 years. She has two daughters, works part-time and goes to school. She says that the biggest problem in her relationship with her husband is communication. "Either I'm not telling him loudly enough what I want, or he's just not listening." She says that when riences that all the women seem to share, whether they are young or old, married or divorced, once married or twice, working in the home or in the labor force. tory, happy and even blissful relationships and marriages.

The letters, written anonyous-ly, are woven with some common threads observations and expe she tries to talk about problems, he withdraws or ignores her. And yet, she writes, he is "an eloquent and intelligent person to talk to." She wonders. Maybe love just doesn't play as big a part in men's lives as it does in women's. "Men seem to be less emotionally dependent than women." Maybe it goes back to how they were raised "women to be mothers and nurtur-ers and supportive, and men to be breadwinners and strong and silent." Not all of the women who responded to our survey reported problems. Many reported satisfac Of the women who responded to our survey Most place a high value on communication.

Good relationships are talking ones; relationships that are breaking down are typically characterized by silence and emotional distance. An overwhelming majority say they wish they could talk about more intimate subjects with their partners. Most blame communication breakdown on the man's failure to listen. Most say that women take love and falling in love more seriously than men, and are more emo This survey It not scientific. Any resemblance to bona fide sociological research it entirely coincidental.

We received 143 responses. Of these, one was bogus and one was from a man, making a total of 141 responses under consideration, since this was a study of women's reponses onty. Analyzing information from essay-type questions it difficult Each letter wat read at least twice (most were read more), with great care, and all parts of each response were analyzed and charted. Responses were charted Into various categories based on content and pattern of response. Common threads emerged.

The results are sometimes quantifiable, sometimes not Asolo's 'Heiress' theatrically broke A- By THOMAS HARRISON Times Stafl Writer 6 Ainslie G. Bruneau's richly textured costumes are among the finest the Asolo has seen. The regrettable irony is that Bruneau's costumes were filled by actors with an unremarkable talent for rendering dated, lackluster material well nigh unlistenable. The story, which takes place either in 1850 (according to the playbill) or near the turn of the century (according 1 -p' SARASOTA I doubt whether even so ponderous I an author as Henry James could I remain alert during the Asolo State Theater's stultifying production of The Heiress. This cruelly dull adaptation of James' novel, Washington Square, made a de iT Ass I1 REVIEW a- I I IV I cent motion picture in 1949.

Ruth and Augustus Goetz based the screen version on their play; William Wyler directed, and the movie earned Oscars for lead actress Olivia de Havilland and the composer Aaron Copland. The cast of the Asolo production may earn awards for valor, but little to the screenplay), focuses on a shy, awkward young woman named Catherine Sloper, who will be worth a considerable fortune upon the death of her father, Dr. Austin Sloper. Painfully shy and sexually inexperienced, Catherine is at the mercy of her father, a domineering boor with a gift for humili theater The Heiress, through Feb. 28 at Asolo State Theater, Sarasota.

Tickets Call 355-5173. --f 4. else. Under Tony Tanner's direction, The Heiress plays like an absurdly contrived theatrical relic. ation.

He continually reminds his daughter that her mother, a lovely, graceful woman, died in childbirth. He has waited almost 30 years for Catherine to step out of her dead mother's shadow. To Dr. Sloper, Catherine is "an entirely mediocre, defenseless creature without a shred of poise." Unable to meet her father's unrea Please see 'HEIRESS 2-D On opening night, the curtain parted to reveal a marvelous set by Bennet Averyt, who has transformed the cramped Asolo stage into an elegant 19th-century parlor in New York City. At the sight of it, the audience applauded.

It was the emotional highlight of the evening. MTVs game show Remote Control tests couch potatoes' knowledge of such things as the Brady Bunch genealogy. Even MTV can't live by music alone By DAVID OKAMOTO Timet Corretpondent SOUND TRACKS Ml -a i i Hi -f i ting 12- to 34-year-olds, you can't get 'em like you can get 'em here. That's been our pitch prior to being on Nielsen We're selling the kind of people who watch MTV." That "kind" of viewer young and dedicated to both pop music and MTV grew up with television and still spends much time in front of it. However, most of today's MTV viewers aren't zapping in and out or using the channel as background music while studying for final exams many viewers are making an effort to tune in for particular shows at particular times.

Some fans can't live without The Young Ones, a hilarious but obnoxious 1983 British sitcom about four college roommates who include a sadistic punk-rocker (Adrian Edmondson), an anarchistic asexual (Rik Mayall) and a lentil-eating hippie (Nigel Planer). Although the same 12 episodes have been airing on MTV every Sunday night for the past three years, Masters says that the ratings continue to grow with every cycle. So MTV has retained the series and just added The Comic Strip Presents (Sundays at 11:10 p.m.), a 1986 British satire series featuring Edmondson, Mayall and Planer. Other viewers faithfully set their VCRs to record 120 Minutes (Sundays at midnight), a two-hour program consisting of videos by such new, innovative artists as Please see MTV 4-0 Now almost 7 years old, MTV: Music Television is discovering that a network cannot live on videos alone. In an effort to beef up ratings and lure more advertisers without turning off viewers, the 24-hour, video music channel has gradually added a new game show and three British comedies including Monty Python's Flying Circus to its program schedule.

On the heels of its 1986 success with reruns of The Monkees and The Beatles cartoons, this development brings MTV closer to resembling a "real," albeit much more irreverent, television network. "We are still a video music channel," says Lee Masters, executive vice president and general manager of MTV and VH-1, noting that more than 90 percent of MTV's programing is videoclip-oriented. "But we're also and it's very important for us to be a youth-oriented network." Combined with such popular video-package shows as The New Video Hour, Club MTV and Rock Blocks, this new programing reflects the network's evolution from hip, new kid on the block to competitive veteran. MTV doesn't need to find viewers anymore it needs to keep them. But the competition is greater than it was six years ago, when everyone was screaming, "I want my MTV!" Cable systems now offer more channels, many of which have video music programs.

And A.C. Nielsen's controversial rating system which has been criticized for its narrow audience samples is reporting lower numbers for most television networks. "I don't think there's a person in the television environment right now, whether it's cable or over the air, that doesn't have some concern with the Nielsen sample," Masters explains, noting that MTV will be reaching 40-million households by March. Although major networks are complaining about losses in ad revenues due to lower rating reports, Masters says MTV hasn't suffered as much. "We sell a demographic, a certain group of people who are hard to reach by traditional means," Masters explains.

"And even with (AGB Television Research's) PeopleMeter methodology, in terms of get Gary W. Sweetman Photography Leon B. Stevens, Kathleen Masterson and Michael McKenzie (left to right) star in The Heiress..