Garden City Telegram from Garden City, Kansas on September 2, 1976 · Page 5
Get access to this page with a Free Trial

Garden City Telegram from Garden City, Kansas · Page 5

Publication:
Location:
Garden City, Kansas
Issue Date:
Thursday, September 2, 1976
Page:
Page 5
Start Free Trial
Cancel

\: Erma Bpmbeck's AT WITS END Funny Family I was watching a situation comedy series the other night of a typical American family. This family laughed until they got sick. Every time Daddy opened his mouth, he was a scream. The mother was a stitch. And the kids were absolute geniuses at spewing out hilarious retorts. I looked around at our group. My husband was deeply depressed over the paper. (He's looked like that since he let his GI insurance lapse.) One child was on the phone insisting, "I don't believe it" every minute and a half. Another ,was locked in his room with the stereo on and the other was staring morosely into the refrigerator waiting for something to embrace him. "You know the trouble with this family? We're not funny. All the other families in the world are sitting around throwing away one-liners and having a barrel of laughs. 'Hawaii Five-0' gets more laiighs than we do." The next night as I heard my husband's car in the garage I shouted, "Hey gang, heeeeereeeees Daddy!" "Well," said our son, "if it . isn't our father whose wallet is full of big bills. . . all unpaid." "What's the matter with you?" asked my husband. "You're on your feet. Has your car been repossessed?" "Dyyynoooomite!" said our youngest. (I almost fell off the chair). "Hey Mom!" said a son, "what do you get if you take a fender from a Chewy, the chrome from a Ford and the hubcaps from a Pontiac?" I shook my head. "Six months!" "A rubber hose up your nose," I said amid laughter. "So," said my husband, "I thought you were going to straighten up the house." "Why?" I asked, "Is it tilted?" (Group doubling over.) "Incidentally, did you hear Mel just got a poodle for his wife?" "I wish I could make a trade like that," he said. "Hey dad," said our daughter, "the dog just ate Mom's meat loaf." "Don't cry," he said, "I'll buy you another dog." Mother poked her head in the door. "Got any coffee?" We all slumped in our chairs exhausted. Thank God for commercials. RNA Stages Sunshine Party Royal Neighbors of America entertained 83 members and g&ests at a Sunshine Party August 26 at the Co-op Center. It is hoped that this event can be staged annually for area senior citizens. Entertainment for the afternoon was provided by The Mystiques from the Sweet Adelines. Mae Gossman's musical group which performed a number of "good old hoe-down" musical selections, and Ruby Wilson disguised as Minnie Pearl. Members of the Mystiques are Wildene Ritchhart, Bonnie Reed, Donna Christensen and Norma Kirkland. Refreshments of homemade cookies and punch were served from tables decorated in a Bicentennial theme. GOOD NEWS FROM AMERICAN MOTORS! All 1976 Cars Now In Stock Will Have A 24 Thousand Mile Or 24 Month Warranty. We Have A Good Selection Of Pacers, Hornets, Gremlins, And Matadors On Hand! SEE THEM AT THE GOOD GUYS PLACE FIVE POINTS MOTOR CO. 276-9291 5 Pouits MONDAY ._-on"- Johnson Photo Mr. and Mrs. Gerald E. Dillon, 2105 N. Main, will celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary Sunday with a reception from 2:30 to 4:30 p.m. at their home. Giving the event for their parents will be Mr. and Mrs. D.O. (Mary Lou) Thompson, Nederland, Tex., Mr. and Mrs. John E. Dillon, Chadron, Neb., Virginia Dillon, Wichita, Mr. and Mrs. Loren D. (Georgia! Miller, Ingalls, and Mr. and Mrs. Kenneth L. Dillon, Littleton, Colo. The Dillons were married September 5, 1926, at Emporia. Friends and relatives are invited to attend the reception, and the couple requests no gifts. Mr. and Mrs. Jack Milligan Jr. are at home in Topeka following thier marriage August 7 at the Topeka First Baptist Church. The Rev. Paul Eppinger officiated for the 7 p.m. ceremony. Mrs. Milligan, the former Claudia Shelor, is the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Claud Shelor, Garden City. Parents of the groom are Mr. and Mrs. E. J. Milligan Sr., Lenexa. The bride is a graduate of Kansas State University with a degree in elementary education, and is a certified reading teacher in the Silver Lake school system. The groom holds a degree in business administration from Trinity University at San Antonio, Tex., and is employed as Governmental Relations Director of the Kansas Motor Carriers Assn. in Topeka. PageS Garden City Telegram Thursday, September 2,1976 Calendar oi Social Events FRIDAY PARENTS WITHOUT PARTNERS 7:30 p.m., Katie Falke, 210 Wesley. Officers urged to attend committee and executive meetings. Deadline for Social Calendar items is 8:30 a.m. for same-day publication. Items may be called in between the hours of 8 and 1! a.m. each day. but none will be taken after 3 p.m. Typed or written notices also may be mailed or deposited in the drop-slot al the Telegram's front door. ANN LANDERS Mom's Indifference Could Be Preoccupation DEAR ANN LANDERS: I've started this letter overhalf a dozen times and still can't figure out how to put it — so, Ann, please bear with me while I tell you my problem. Actually it's HER problem — my mom's. I'm an outgoing, happy, all- together, 14-year-old girl. There are six kids in our .,, family. I .try not/to rattle on rewards to raising children, but there are also many heartaches. Although we both love children, my husband and I decided to remain childless after much discussion and years of soul-searching. Why? We were married 14 years ago because we loved each other wanted to share a life together. *W*'feel-we owe < no excuses VICENTE FERNANDEZ V ANGELICA MARIA * • . r, i,.,, A.H04ILIO alUMA "" IAIA GAICIA k A COLO IOBB OPEN 8-.15-START 8:45 and tin-when I talk. I know'-hoW l 'for the cxrarse we have chosen, boring it can be. BuH do'like" yet you would not believe the to tell my mom the fun things that happen during the day. She seems interested at the beginning, then in the middle of a sentence she'll pick up a newspaper and start to read. I start to talk faster just to finish what I'm saying. Then she says, "Quit jabbering. You sound like an idoit." Yesterday was the last straw. She started to read a cookbook and I stopped talking in the middle of a sentence. Mom didn't even notice. I don't think I should talk to her any more. What do you think, Miss Landers?— Ignored Daughter. Dear Daughter: Keep talking, honey. Don't let your mom's seeming indifference get you down. I'll bet she really does care but maybe she has a lot on her mind. Just for the heck of it, read this column and ask if she has any idea who wrote the letter. It may change a few things around your house. * * * DEAR ANN: The results of your survey about having children have created controversy and discussion everywhere. May I add one more word? Most shocking was not that 70 per cent said they would NOT have had children if they could live their lives over again, but that so many people were so honest! Granted, there are many of readers have testified since that column appeared. Sorry, I had never heard of SmokEnders, but I'm glad to tell the world about any program that gets people off cigarettes. Any one who wants more information can write to SmokEnders, Inc., 3435 Camino Del Rio South, Suite 216, San Diego, California 92108. , ...,.,li;.. . ,!..'. i < V!'-, 1 ,. MR. AND MRS. JACK MILLIGAN JR. (Claudia Shelor) Rudy Valenzuela the prescription shop 602 N. 7th Garden City $5.98 Value Natural VITAMIN E 200 Unit $3.69 $8.69 Value 100THERAGRANM with 30 Free $5.73 $2.33 Value TRIAM1NICIN Tablets $1.12 $3.60 Value ROBITUSSIN DM Night Cal Nurses 4 $2.38 A * R -5 * R * A physical check-up, made while you're well, can keep you that way! See your doctor. Seei us for medicines. All Insulin Sold At Cost DRIVE-IN WINDOW FOR DELIVERY PRE-LABOR NIGHT MARATHON ONE NIGHT ONLY SUN.-SEPT. 5th harassment we have suffered because of our decision. We have encountered the most vicious hostility from people with children. It's almost as if they are mad at us for escaping the problems they are struggling with. The major mistake is in assuming that parenthood is for everyone. Judging from your survey, perhaps it's for only 30 per cent. Sign me — One Vote For Realism Dear Real: Thanks for an up-front, no-holds-barred letter. I liked it. * * * DEAR ANN LANDERS: Your response to the person who asked for suggestions on how to quit smoking was most irritating. First of all, what makes you an authority on the subject? You've stated repeatedly that you have never smoked. You say "cold turkey" is the best way. You could be wrong. I happen to be a member of SmokEnders, Inc., and arn confident that eventually I will quit smoking with the help of this great program. Their approach is not "cold turkey," it's much more human and vitually painless. If you haven't tried it, Ann, please don't knock it. — Kicking The Habit Dear Kicking:SmokEnders does get results, as hundreds SPECIAL NOTICE The Admiral distributor for Kansas has made emergency shipments of televisions tons because of their lack of warehouse space. Therefore, they have greatly reduced our cost and enable us to pass the savings on to you. *549 95 SAVE *240°° ADMIRAL 25" Color Console Reg. 789.95 MODEL 25C618 100% Solid State Reg. 789.95 MODEL 25C611 18" ADMIRAL COLOR PORTABLE TV- $ 369 NOW SHOWING! ' ' [NOW SHOWiNG!| 2 Showings Nitely-7:35-9:30 OPEN 8:15 -START 8:45 THE TRANS-AMERICAN OUTLAW ROAD RACE- A DEMOLITION DERBY WITHOUT RULES! SUNDAY ONLY SCORE WITH 1HE "LOVE DOLLS" DAVID CARRADINE Is CANNONBALL — RONHOWAW MONDAY -OHIY- "MECM.DE LAKUBE" -Aho"ENTRE MONJASANOA EL DIABLO" MurderbyDe^h KIUXN BKKNNAN • TOIMAN VACUIT. • (AMIS UX« • mm HILK AUX UHNNKSS • ELM LANCHESraH • 1WV1IINIVKN • VKOM SKLLKKi AMCY WA1.KKK • t'STELLF W1NWUUU ONLY $1 1*1)00 ' ^^ Admiral Multiplex Stereo Recorder with Garrard turntable, air-suspension speakers, and deluxe stand. When purchased with Admiral console color television at regular price. Regular Cash Price *364 95 Many models to choose from, our low prices have never been this low. ALL YOU NEED IS YOUR HONEST FACE RENT-BUY, Inc. FURNITURE AND APPLIANCES 909 E. Fulton 275-9191 Open 8:30 to 5:30 Mon.-Sat. I

What members have found on this page

Get access to Newspapers.com

  • The largest online newspaper archive
  • 11,100+ newspapers from the 1700s–2000s
  • Millions of additional pages added every month

Try it free