The Reporter from Fond du Lac, Wisconsin • 10

i ogo 10 The Reporter, Thursdoy, Dee. 22, 1977 Phoebe Snow sings an earthy 4 octaves THE PRIVATE EYE David Handler KORM ELI'S' BEVERA6E MART I 40S Fond du Uc Avenue Acrois from Hie Foirgrouodi Mioiw 921 -5401 1. Opto Monday thru Satwdoy a.m. to 9 Sunday a.m. to 2 p.m.

FOX (Mission Host! W.L 'The Love Boat9 that drunken singles bash By DOLORES BARCLAY Associated Press Writer NEW YORK (AP) A barefoot Phoebe Snow stumbled to the door of her hotel suite in blue jeans and sweatshirt, trying her hardest to contain a sleepy yawn an occupational hazard of being on the road. From the next room, the last I deluxe Branay Vv LI $183 S129 5W echoes of an "All in the Family" Ret. ot. Vlr, I VERY tired. I don't know why it was so funny, but it was.

"You should have seen Archie. Shock. Total shock. He even called a yarmulke a beenie!" At last, Phoebe Snow settles into a corner of the sofa, tossing aside few remnants of her "road" life as she sits. "Don't get upset about that little furry thing," she says, picking up a small, dark brown object.

"It's just a wig." She yawns again and shakes her curly head. "Why did I stay up late last night?" Last night was Philadelphia. Today is New York. Tomorrow morning is another city, another hotel. In a little more than an hour, she has to report to Avery Fisher Hall at Lincoln Center to do a sound check and rehearsal rerun mix with Phoebe's earthy giggles as she describes one of Archie Bunker's exploits.

"You see, a friend of Archie's for her concert at 8 p.m. She'd also like to sleep for two hours before the performance. "We have a good time up there my band and she says. "We love each other. When one of my band members is hurting, I'm hurting and vice versa." It is perhaps this sort of intimacy and liking among the musicians involved that helps make every album of this four-octave singer a success.

Her first hit, and also her first record, came in 1974. It was the single "Poetry Man" from the album "Phoebe Snow." Within months, the album was certified gold. Her second album, "Second Childhood," went gold soon after its release. "It Looks Like Snow" followed the birth of her daughter, Valerie Rose. Her latest album is "Never Letting Go." I've never lost my romantic fascination with the sea.

As a slight, bespectacled lad I spent endless hours between the covers of Jack London and Rudyard Kipling, lost in their tales of action and adventure. There I was on my way to the Far East, a knife between my teeth. A man to count on in a fight the kind of guy nobody dared tell to clean up his room. The sea has always been my escape valve. Even after I got older and the awareness of rope burns, seasickness and a lack of privacy impinged on my fantasy, nothing has shaken my faith in it.

Nothing, that is, until "The Loveboat." If "The Loveboat" is to be believed, the high seas have been seized by dull, shallow swingers. A one-hour trip on this ship is like an entire night at a 1 Old We will be open for your convenience TT Milwaukee December p.m. December 25 9-Noon I dies and his last name was Cunningham, she begins. "Archie thought he was Irish. But it turns out he was really Jewish," said Miss Snow, who Very MeriyChristn was raised in the Jewish tradition, as she pushed up her glasses to wipe away the laugh tears.

"I'll be all right. I'm just PAUL'S- riJOY NEw-fEARs EVE AT LAKE AIRE SUPPER CLUB rr-rrrr V-U-MtrfrrrtitLTTrz SUNSET SHORES 1 VwyrNoTththeIkV1 Come Celebrate New Year's Eve Special Menu 5 p.m.-1 1:30 p.m. Salad Bar VH Join Us! OPEN HOUSE Wim NEW YEAR'S EVE yM Ctyj(A Serving Our ')L? Regular Menu J. )) 5 p.m. -11 p.m.

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Entertainment Friday Night By "THE BRANDED MEN" FRIDAY NIGHT SPECIALS! HADDOCK s250 PERCH 275 J350 Plus Our FRIDAY NIGHT SMORGASBORD Serving Barbecued lbs, Poor Man's lobster, Perch and Chicken All for Only Person We Will Be Closed Christmas Eve Christmas Day someone dragged you to. Leaving land is no longer a nieans of getting away. On the contrary, "The Love Boat" has reduced life at sea to two or three scotch and sodas, a stupid joke and a pat answer. Take the lawyer who just spent three years in jail and goes on "The Love Boat" only to "accidentally" bump into the partner who framed him. Or the confused young husband who's on a cruise to think things out the guy's pregnant wife is on the same boat.

Structurally, it is a descended of Love, American Style, that amalgam of schlock sketches and blackouts which, it was generally agreed at the time, was as bad as TV would ever get. The only real differences are that "The Love Boat" has some regular characters, a slightly tighter weaving of love-oriented encounters and a few less laughs, which all is to say none at all. Each week we get a married couple on the rocks who consume their allotted time on screen by hurling insults at each other. My favorite duo so far is Shecky Greene and Florence Henderson. When the purser wishes them a pleasant Christmas cruise, Flo snaps, "I'd rather be in a swamp for a week with Idi Amin." Shecky and Flo decide to be as unpleasant as they can to force the other into asking for a divorce.

Flo hits the gift shop, where she learns from ship's doctor Bernie Koppell that his ex-wife's spending is what drove him to divorce court (everyone on "The Love Boat" seems to have an ex). Says the doc: "Let me put it this way if she didn't show up at Tiffnay's at least once a week they'd send her a get well card." Flo makes with the credit cards, Shecky heads for the bottle. "Since when did you start drinking?" Flo asks him. "I don't remember." Shecky replies. "I'm drinking to forget." Your Crew fills in the gaps between the two or three relationships that make up an episode.

The doctor dispenses advice, the bartender tries to get everyone drunk (they are, after all, supposed to be having a good time) and the purser offers up something which, near as I can detect, is homespun wit. But worst of all is Your Captain. Those of us who remember Gavin MacLeod fondly as Murray in Mary Tyler Moore ought to chip in a buck apiece to match his salary and keep him out of this show. He is a gruff, unpleasant Commander Queeg figure who heaps ketchup on his temperamental chef's specialty and growls at his crew, "Christmas is just another working day." Although Your Captain is ultimately revealed to have a heart of gold, he is totally dislikeable for 59 minutes per week. Perhaps the character was drawn this way to dilute "The Love Boat's syrup content which is dangerously high but he is noticeably wrong for the show.

And MacLeod is totally wasted. It staggers me that a show which compares unfavorably to "Love, American Style," is doing so well in the ratings. "The Love Boat" has actually bumped Carol Burnett to another night. Face it unless you have a morbid fascination with charting television's new lows, "The Love Boat" has nothing to offer. And if you still hold onto a romantic yearning for the sea, you could even get a little bitter about it.

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