The Morning Call from Allentown, Pennsylvania • 59

MORNING CALL SUNDAY, DECEMBER 1, 2002 E7 OCCASIONS Humor DAVE BARRY And to all a good Rum-Pa-Pa-Pum Let's all get into the Holiday Spirit, as expressed by the festive song heard so very often on the radio at this time of year: "Tingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock!" "Jingle bell BANG That was the festive sound of the radio being struck with a hammer by reader Sarah Frates, who writes to say she is sick of "Jingle Bell Rock." She also states that her husband, Ralph, is not a big fan of "The Little Drummer Boy." I am with Ralph on that. Oh, sure, "The Little Drummer Boy" is a beautiful song, for maybe the first 35 minutes. But eventually it gets on your nerves, those voices shrieking "Rum-pa-pa-pum!" For openers, drums do not go "Rum-papa-pum." Drums go "Rat-a-tat-tat." Also I have issues with the line from "The Little Drummer Boy" that goes: "The ox and lamb kept time." Really? How? Did they clack their hooves together, castanet-style? Did they dance? Are we supposed to believe that two barnyard animals with legume-level IQs spontaneously started doing the macarena? I'll tell you this: If I were taking care of a newborn baby, and somebody came around whacking on a drum, that person would find himself at the emergency room having his drumsticks surgically removed from his rum-pa-pa-pum, if you know what I mean. Speaking of Christmas songs we maybe could do without, perhaps this has happened to you: You're throwing a Christmas party, and you start singing carols, and everyone's having a festive time because you are doing songs with easy-to-remember words, such as "fa," "la" and "la." But then, invariably, some guest, not thinking it through, launches into "The Twelve Days of Christmas." The singers gamely struggle through the gold rings, maybe even the geese a-laying. But then things start to go horribly wrong.

Because in these hectic times, when everybody must remember an ATM code and 143 computer passwords, nobody has the brain capacity to remember what my true love gave to me on all Twelve Days of Christmas. Some people are singing about lords a-prancing; others are singing about pipers leaping; and others are going with "fa la la." The song lurches forward like a bus with transmission trouble until, somewhere around the 10th day "10 milkers it shudders to a pathetic halt. Then, inevitably, some eggnog-fueled moron starts singing "The Little Drummer Boy," and your party is OVER. Don't get me wrong: I love Christmas songs, and I'm glad there are so many good ones. My wife, who is Jewish, laments the fact that there is basically only one Hanukkah song, "The Dreidel Song," which mostly consists of shouting "Dreidel! Dreidel! Dreidel!" is Hebrew for At our house, when we celebrate Hanukkah (we celebrate every religious holiday in our house, including Elvis' birthday) we try hard to create a festive musical mood.

"Let's sing 'The Dreidel Song'!" we say, and then we launch into "Dreidel! Dreidel! Dreidel!" The song consumes maybe a minute. When it's done, we sit around, looking at each other hopefully, until finally the tension becomes unbearable, and someone says: "Let's sing 'The Dreidel Song' again!" By nightfall we are exhausted. To rectify the holiday-song imbalance, maybe those of us who grew up in the Christian tradition could offer our Jewish brethren and sistren, as a gift, some of our traditional holiday songs. For example, we could offer "Frosty the Snowman," which a's far as I can tell has nothing to do with Christmas anyway, unless there's a New Testament chapter that I overlooked lo, the three wise men DID maketh a man from snow, and one of them DID findeth an old silk hat, and he saideth, 'Hey! I gotteth an And Speaking of the wise men: How many of you readers, when you hear the words "We three kings of Orient are," even if you are attending a somber worship service, find that your brain automatically responds with "Smoking on a rubber Me, too. It's like at weddings, when the organist plays "Here comes the bride," and everybody's brain, including the groom's, automatically responds: "Big, fat and wide." But that is not my point.

Clearly, I have no point. I just want to wish you a happy holiday season, and remind you that this is a time when we are loving and forgiving and not easily offended by newspaper columns. May your days be merry and bright; inay Jack Frost not nip too hard at your nose; may you be blessed with a big old bowl of figgy pudding; and above all may you truly understand the meaning of the words that have been a beacon of hope to humanity for thousands of years: "Thumpety thump thump; thumpety thump thump; look at Frosty Dave Barry is a humor columnist for the Miami Herald. Write to him The Miami Herald, One Herald Plaza, Miami FL 33132. SCENE Awards, honors and recognition aplenty On The Scene TINA BRADFORD LEADERSHIP GURU DAZZLES UNITED WAY LUNCHEON GUESTS Sixty leading area women attended the United Way's Women's Leadership Initiative Inaugural Luncheon at the Banana Factory Nov.

15. Guests soon realized keynote speaker and honorary chairman Frances Hesselbein is unlike any extraordinary woman they've ever met. An Easton resident for the past 12 years, Hesselbein is founding president and chairman of the Peter F. Drucker Foundation for NonProfit Management in New York City. Her accolades are endless.

Two days prior to her address in Bethlehem, she was in Philadelphia, as the first woman ever to earn the Dwight D. Eisenhower National Security Award. "The room was full of generals, colonels, scientists," says Hesselbein, who served as CEO of the Girl Scouts USA for 14 years, from 1976 to 1990. Her first book, "Hesselbein on Leadership" (Jossey-Bass, 152 $17.95) was published in September and received rave reviews. USA Today says Hesselbein touts moral and ethical leadership.

She has been awarded 16 honorary doctoral degrees. In 1998, President Clinton awarded her the Presidential Medal of Freedom, the nation's highest civilian honor. In her 20-minute address to Lehigh Valley women she said, "Serving the greater good is a calling, not a job." She also said, "To lead, to innovate, to change lives is more important than ever in a world forever changed." Hesselbein, who had been the first woman ever to head the United Way campaign in Johnstown, also served as a board member. She often speaks to Ivy League MBA students, who usually think she's joking when she tells how her management skills were first honed leading Girl Scout Troop 17 in Johnstown. Most people underestimate the management skills needed to head a troop of thirty 10-year-olds, she says.

Some of the women attending the United Way Women's Leadership Initiative, which concluded with a book signing by Hesselbein, were: Victoria Penske Aitchison, Rose Ackerman, Joanne Barnette, Jan Armfield, Polly Beste, Marlene "Linny" Fowler, Barbara Diamond, Judy Chase, Jane Ervin, Carol Henn, Kathryn Stephanoff, Patricia Levin and Barbara Rothkopf. Betsy Torrence served as volunteer chairman. Laurie Gostely-Plackett and Carol Carpenter also organized the event. Afterwards, Pat Kesling offered a tour of the Banana Factory. Those interested in learning more about The United Way of Lehigh Valley's Women's Leadership Initiative, the first in the state, should call 610-758-8010.

VOLUNTEERS OF AMERICA SLATED TO FEATURE HESSELBEIN, HUNT AS SPEAKERS Frances Hesselbein will be in the Lehigh MEIXSELL-STEINMETZ Melissa A. Meixsell, daughter of Mary Ellen Meixsell of Slatington and the late Larry Meixsell, to Matthew A. Steinmetz, son of Ann and Paul Steinmetz of Lehighton. MCKELVEY -JONES Kate J. McKelvey, daughter of the late Jane McKelvey Baker and the late Hugh McKelvey and stepdaughter of Hal Baker of Tatamy, to Brian P.

Jones, son of Colleen Jones of Bangor. LEHIGH VALLEY HOSPITAL, SALISBURY TOWNSHIP SONS Nov. 24 Joseph and Dina Arnone, Bethlehem. Nov. 23 Maria Logan, Allentown.

Daniel and Elizabeth Forman, Laurys Station. Emery Plummer and Terresa Alvarado, Allentown. Nov. 22 Adam and Danyell Horst, Bethlehem. Donald Young Jr.

and Irene Harvey, Allentown. Jamie and Dorothy McFadden, South Whitehall Township. Michael and Melinda a Brittingham, East Greenville. Nov. 21 Brian and JoAnn Bastian, Barto.

Manus D. McLean and Ursula Hoffman, Slatington. George and Amy Sunder, Lower Nazareth Township. Thomas G. Moll Erika J.

Pratt, Northampton. Philip and Jennette Stier, Northampton. Nov. 20 Mark and Michelle Smeltz, New Tripoli. Timothy C.

Paules Jr. and Candace N. Sullivan, Northampton. Ashlee Dunn, Allentown. Jeremy and Kristine Fox, North Coventry, Montgomery County.

Jeff H. Fischl Jr. and Jennifer M. Hudak, Catasauqua. Nov.

19 Mark and Heather Hancharik, Allentown. Nov. 18 Darcy and Kathy Calkins, Whitehall Township. Christopher and Krissa Schlosser, Whitehall Township. Drunker Valley again at noon on Tuesday, Dec.

10, at dance Nov. 23 at the Holiday The Clarion Hotel, Allentown, as guest speaker Center in Fogelsville. for a luncheon sponsored by The Volunteers of America Children's Center. Susan Hunt, publisher of The Morning Call, will share the podium, as guest speaker. For an invitation to the event, call Volunteers of America, at 610-432-8352.

HEALTHY COOKING AUTHOR HONORED BY CASTEL DI LUCIO SOCIETY its 85th Anniversary on Nov. 16, the organization also honored Dr. Joanne D'Agostino, an Easton author, nutrition consultant and community volunteer. More then 150 guests gathered at the Castel di Lucio Society of Easton, one of the oldest Italian organizations in the Lehigh Valley, to celebrate. D'Agostino was there with husband Dr.

Frank D'Agostino, an Easton Hospital physician, and extended family members. Her first published venture, "Italian Cooking For A Healthy Heart," was so well received that it sold more than 4,500 copies in less than 15 minutes when it was introduced on QVC in the late 1980s. Lou Reda, of Lou Reda Productions, helped with the book and the QVC appearance. In 1995, the book was chosen as one of 25 books in the country to be used at the National Institute of Health for its cancer research program. For the past 16 years, Joanne has worked as a nutritional consultant, an author and as a columnist for the Express-Times.

In addition to writing two cookbooks, Joanne also has co-authored numerous other health publications and has served as a contributing editor for Prevention Magazine. She was educated in the Easton School district and graduated from the Easton Hospital School of Nursing. She has a bachelor's degree in nursing from Cedar Crest College, a master's degree in education administration from Lehigh University and a doctorate in nutrition from LaSalle. When the Castel di Lucio Society celebrated MINA HYMAN, BOB WOOD, DEXTER AND DOTTY BAKER HONORED AT BOYS GIRLS CLUB OF ALLENTOWN DINNER DANCE Balloons were everywhere at the Boys and Girls Club of Allentown's 14th annual dinner EN ENGAGEMENTS NTS APPLETON-DIETER Karen Appleton, daughter of Donald and Barbara Appleton of Springfield, Bucks County, to Eugene Dieter I1, son of Eugene and Carol Dieter of Whitehall Township. FARRELL-MACANIFF Megan Maureen Farrell, daughter of Raymond and Mary Farrell of Allentown, to Michael Kane MacAniff, son of John and Patricia MacAniff of Chatham, N.J.

COUCH-LEDERER Rachel J. Couch, daughter of Patricia J. Harmon and stepdaughter of David Tongel of Worcester, to Omar J. Lederer, son of Remberd and Rita Lederer of Macungie. ALBERT-MCCRACKEN Lori Albert, daughter of C.

Louis and Cynthia Albert of Temple, to D. Scott McCracken, son of Dennis and Susan McCracken of Wescosville. MORE ENGAGEMENTS, PAGE E9 BIRTHS DAUGHTERS Nov. 22 Scott and Rachel Kerchner, Whitehall Township. Gregory and Daneen Dex, Whitehall Township.

Curtis and Cynthia Pick, New Tripoli. Nov. 21 Jarrod and Brenda Pensyl, Virginville. John and Hannah Fay, Emmaus. Kevin and Nina McNally, Allentown.

Keith and Kimberly Fowler, Quakertown. Nov. 20 Stephen and Lynn Wiener, Allentown. Stephen and Karen Yeager, Walnutport. Steven Ashley and Jessica Smith, East Stroudsburg.

Samuel Sanchez and Heather B. Hartley, Allentown. Nov. 19 Alexis Galarza and Maritza Reyes, Allentown. Matthew and Sheila Reis, Palmerton.

Frank and Melanie Becker, Lyon Station. Grant and Amy Fairbanks, Allentown. Edward and Stephanie Kornfeind, Mertztown. TWIN DAUGHTERS Nov. 21 Robert T.

and Stephanie Krasley, Emmaus. SACRED HEART HOSPITAL, ALLENTOWN SONS Nov. 22 Cassandra Robinson, Allentown. Nov. 19 William and Lisa Silvius FRANCES HESSELBEIN (holding award), chairman of The Drucker Foundation, received the Dwight D.

Eisenhower National Security Series Award in Philadelphia Nov. 19. Contributed photo Inn Conference Among the 125 guests were special honorees including Mina Hyman, spouse of Dr. Herbert Hyman. Hyman, a member of the Boys Girls Club board of directors, has compiled a remarkable record of community service in the Lehigh Valley, including scholarships offered to children of HIV parents to attend two weeks of camp.

A portion of the funds are raised through the The Hyman companies, owners of the H. Landau and Bocelli Boutiques, in which Mina is chairperson. She also is a trustee at Muhlenberg College. Also honored for their work in the community and with children, were Ardath Rodale, Bob Wood and Dexter and Dorothy Baker. The dinner marks the first time area girls have been part of the club.

The balloons, with a photo of each child, were part of a special incentive for guests or the community at large to support academic enrichment programs for children attending Boys Girls Club. For $100 a balloon, children will be able to take part in programs such as Project Learn, Make Your Mark, Just the F.A.C.T.s and The Technology Center. Anyone interested in sponsoring a child with a $100 balloon may contact either Pat Johnson or Cheryl Laub at 610-432-9944. CORRECT DATE FOR DOWNTOWN BETHLEHEM ACTIVITIES Richard Groman is resurrecting the legacy of the Groman family bakery at the spanking new Daddy Gromans shop, located inside Technicolor Grand Salon in Bethlehem. Party guests will sample a buffet of baked treats, including holiday favorite Moravian sugar cake, at an opening party 6-9 p.m.

Friday. Wardrobe consultant Jane Roncoroni will officially unveil her new smart digs inside Technicolor Grand at the same time. Roncoroni's opening will include refreshments and a showing of French Rags, a specialty knitwear designer collection from California. Tina Bradford is a freelance writer. Information for this column may be sent to Scene, Features Department, The Morning Call, Box 1260, Allentown, PA 18105 or e-mailed to with "Scene" in the message field.

TREZZA-EISENHARD June Trezza, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Anthony Trezza of Valley Forge, to Bruce A. Eisenhard son of Mr. and Mrs.

Bruce Eisenhard of Allentown. WECHSLER-REGALIS Susan Wechsler, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. John W. Wechsler of Whitehall Township, to Scott Regalis, son of Mr.

and Mrs. David Regalis of Bethlehem. Palmerton Nov. 2 Farrell T.C. Metzger and Deseree J.

Hertzog, Slatington. DAUGHTER Nov. 19 Stephen and Marci Fellin, Lenhartsville. ST. LUKE'S HOSPITAL, ALLENTOWN CAMPUS SONS Nov.

20 Pedro Rios and Elizabeth Camacho, Allentown. Nov. 19 Juan Alejandro Lopez and Kellie A. Peters, Allentown. Mark and Christie Kratzer, Allentown.

Christina Calario, Northampton. Nov. 17 T.J. and MaryAnn Ortman, Allentown. DAUGHTERS Nov.

22 Dr. and Mrs. Brian Barnes, Emmaus. Keith and Wendy Fox, Whitehall Township. Scott and Deborah Mease, Richlandtown.

Nov. 20 Christopher and Kimberly Dunn, Macungie. Chris and Larissa Schache, Whitehall Township. Nov. 19 Stephanie M.

Mazer, Allentown. Bernard and Dawn Stewart, Allentown. Nov. 18 Matthew and Alison Rhone, Macungie. ST.

LUKE'S HOSPITAL, FOUNTAIN HILL SONS Nov. 21 Mr. and Mrs. Paul A. Moench, Lower Saucon Township.

Michael Bickert and Cassandra Pacovich, Wind Gap. Sean G. Radley and Danielle A. Frank, Effort. Nov.

20 Rich and Diane Martinetti, Saylorsburg. Craig Kolbe and Cindy Hare, Easton. Nov. 18 Ricardo and Minique Ferrer-Rios, Bethlehem. Mr.

and Mrs. Craig Reto, Mr. and Mrs. Jeffrey Stoudt, Coopersburg. Christopher and Katherine Joyce, Delaware Water Gap.

Irvin March and Carrieanne Stufflet, Allentown. Nov. 17 Creighton and Erin Faust, Center Valley. Sal and Nicki Pelonero, Easton. DAUGHTERS Nov.

20 Anthony Rivera and Laura DeVatt, Bethlehem. Nov. 19 Robert and Inna Pucci, Easton. Nov. 18 Stephen and Lisa Speshok, Bethlehem.

Michael and Molly Graver, Allentown. Michael Hicks and Cinthya Ibarra, Bethlehem. Thomas D. Waring and Lee Anne Woolley, Pen Argyl. Javier A.

Berrios and Maritza Garcia, Allentown. Mr. and Mrs. Andre Wagner, Bangor. Nov.

17 Mr. and Mrs. Timothy Weaver, Allentown..