The Morning Call from Allentown, Pennsylvania • 44

THE MORNING CALL WEDNESDAY, MARCH 6, 2002 E5 TON IGHT'S PREVIEW pnrr-rxTr-r Jaimie Trueblood UPN 'AS a new dramedy premiering at 8 on UPN, stars (clockwise from bottom left in left photo) Derek Hughes, Emily Corrie, Chris Engen, Trade Thorns, Adrienne Wilkinson and Robin Dunne. Following it at 9 is 'Random a new comedy starring (from left in right photo) Natalia Cigliuti, Will Friedle, Sean Murray and Joshua Ackerman. UPN debuts two new youth-driven series I 7:30 I 8:00 I 8:30 I 9:00 I 9:30 I 10:00 I 10:30 I 11:00 BP 7:00 Big Band Sound ol World War II Blast! 70a Soul Jam Best of Festival Entertain. Tonight 60 Minutes II Survivor: Marquesas Back to the Beach' 48 Hours News Hollywood Squares 60 Minutes II Survivor: Marquesas Back to the Beach' 48 Hours News Access Hollywood Ed The West Wing Dead Irish Writers' Law Order Born Again' News Seinfeld That '80s Show Grounded for Life Bernie Mac Show Titus The Session' News Seinfeld Wheel of Fortune My Wife and Kids According to Jim Drew Carey Show The Job Parents' Downtown News Wheel of Fortune My Wife and Kids According to Jim Drew Carey Show The Job Parents' Downtown News Jamie Foot Show Enterprise Civilization' As If Pilot' The Random Years News Blind Date CD Access Hollywood Ed The West Wing Dead Irish Writers' Law 4 Order Born Again' News (Q Raymond Dawson's Creek 'Four Scary Stories' Glory Days Death, Lies and Videotape' News Friends (B Last of the Wine American Family The Wall' Joseph Campbell the Power of Myth 'Sacrifice and Bliss; Love and the Goddess; Masks of Eternity' Hollywood Squares My Wife and Kids According to Jim Drew Carey Show The Job 'Parents' Downtown News QJ Just Shoot Me Dawson's Creek Four Scary Stories' Glory Days Death, Lies and Videotape' News Friends EB King of the Hill 60 Minutes II Billy Graham 48 Hours News BP Jeopardyl Ed The West Wing Dead Irish Writers' Law Order 'Born Again' News i 6B Seinfeld That '80s Show Grounded for Life Bernie Mac Show Titu The Session' News Seinfeld ED NewsHour Rock, Rhythm Poo Wop Host Frankie Valli, You Being Served? 03 Coach Movie: "The Last Wave" (PG, 77) Richard Chamberlain, Olivia Hamnett Night Heat The Professional' MAD TV 68 Raymond Enterprise 'Civilization' As II Pilot' The Random Years Judge Mathis Judge Mathis Martin BP Bethlehem Glory Live With Pat Huber Worship TV Heroes Turning Point Worship TV (JIP) (3D The Cosby Show Star Trek: Voyager Friendship One' Real TV The Cosby Show News News The Honeymooners I 7:00 Law Order Biography Gary Condit' American Justice Driven to Kill' City Confidential Albuquerque' Law Order AMC 7:00 Three Stooges Movie: "The Last Hard Men" (R, 76) Charlton Heston, James Coburn Movie: "Cheyenne Autumn" ('64) Richard Widmark ANPL Animal Videos The Crocodile Hunter Diaries The Jeff Corwin Experience Ultimate Killers Speed and Strength' Crocodile Hunter BBC Changing Rooms Keeping Up 8:40 Keeping Up Appearances Monty Python Monty Python French Saunders Changing Rooms BET BET.com Ctdn. How I'm Living Life Track Oh Dramal "ComicView News i BRAV 7:00 Hill St.

Blues Movie: "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels" (PG, '88) Steve Martin, Michael Caine Inside the Actors Studio Sarah J. Parker' Movie CNBC 7:00 Capital Report America Now Hardball With Chris Matthews The News With Brian Williams America Now CNN Crossfire American Stories The Point Larry King Live NewsNight With Aaron Brown Crossfire COM Beat the Geeks Movie: Big" (PG, '88) Tom Hanks, Elizabeth Perkins South Park South Park Daily Show With CSN 700 NBA Basketball Cleveland Cavaliers at Philadelphia 76ers Sixers Postgame SportsNite Best Sports Show PIS 7i00 Movie: "The Sandlot" (PG, '93) Tom Guiry, Mike Vitar 8:50 Movie: "The Poof Point ('01) Tahj Mowry, Raquel Lee 10:25 Movie: "Big Man on Campus" i DSC Animal Mummies Engineering the Impossible Europe-to-Africa bridge. Skyscraper at Sea Justice Files El Nearly Famous The El True Hollywood Story Grace, Caroline, Stephanie: Curse of the Royal Family' Revealed With Jules Asner Mel Gibson' Howard Stern ESP 7:00 College Basketball Big East First Round College Basketball Big East First Round from New York. ES2 College Basketball NEC Tournament. Final' Central Connecticut State vs.

Quinnipiac College Basketball 'Conference USA First Round from Cincinnati FAM Funny Videos The World's Greatest Magic III With the Pendragons. Whose Line Is It? Whose Line Is It? The 700 Club FOOD 7:00 Cooking Livel Emeril Live Teenage Takeover' Skewers. Good Eats The Best Of Ming's Quest Mario Eats Italy Emeril Live FX Buffy the Vampire M'A'S'H M'A'S'H Major Ego'" The Practice Part Married With Married With Ally McBeal FXN Fox Report The O'Reilly Factor Hannity Colmes On the Record With Greta Van Susteren The O'Reilly Factor GAME Super Password Family Feud Let's Make a Deal Match Game Press Your Luck Newlywed Game Newlywed Game 3's a Crowd GOLF Golf Central Viewer's Forum Profiles of a Pro Euro Tour Weekly Golf Central Viewer's Forum GTV 7:00 Combat! Movie: "Better Late Than Never" (79) Harold Gould, Tyne Daly Flea Market Mania Combat! HALL 7:00 Hart to Hart Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman Movie: "The Piano Lesson (PG, 95) Charles Dutton, Alfre Woodard Northern Exposure HGTV Before After Flea Market Finds Appraisal Fair Kitty Bartholomew Country Style Hobbies Crafts 2002 With Carol Duvall Flea Market Finds HIS Television Dangerous Missions Forward Observers' High-Tech Weapons War Games History's Mysteries LIF 7:00 Portrait Unsolved Mysteries Movie: "The Patron Saint of Liars" ('98) Dana Delany, Clancy Brown Golden Girls MTV 7:00 DFX Prime Time Players Artists to Watch Road Home MTV Cribs MTV Cribs Diary 'Nas' Nas. Dismissed NIK Rugrats SpongeBob Square.

As Told by Ginger The Cosby Show. The Cosby Show The Cosby Show The Cosby Show The Cosby Show PAX Supermarket Sweep Candid Camera Video store mayhem. Touched by an Angel Fallen Angela' Diagnosis Murder Murder by Friendly Fire' It's a Miracle SCI 7:00 Earth: Conflict The Outer Limits Fathers and Sons' Movie: "Alien (R, 79) Tom Skerritt. Sigourney Weaver SPD Past Champions Auto Racing: NASCAR WC UAW-Daimler Chrysler 400' From Las Vegas. Inside Winston Cup TBS Roseanne Ripley's Believe It or Notl Movie: "Cocktail" (R.

'88) Tom Cruise. Bryan Brown Believe It or Notl TCM 5:30 Movie Movie: "Seven Days in May" 64) Burt Lancaster. Kirk Douglas Movie: "Born Yesterday" ('50) Judy Holliday, William Holden TLC 7:00 Eye Spy Monster Machines Miners' Junkyard Wars Ballistic Missiles' Building the Impossible: Submarine Monster Machines TNN MAD TV Star Trek: Next Generation Redemption' Movie: "Star Treklll: The Search for Spock (PG, '84) William Shatner. DeForest Kelley TNT JM The Pretender NBA Basketball: Los Angeles Lakers at Utah Jazz Inside the NBA Movie TVL Andy Griffith Love Boat Till Death Do Us Part Maybe' Hove Lucy The Munsters Andy Gritlith Andy Griffith Beverly Hillbillies INI 7:00 La Intrusa Amigas Rivales Salome Don Francisco Presents Impacto Extra USA 7:00 JAG Hemlock' Movie: "Drop Zone" (R, '94) Wesley Snipes, Gary Busey Combat Missions JAG Hemlock' WE Great Romances Movie: "Tango" (PG-13. 98) Miguel Angel Sola.

Cecilia Narova Movie: "Mrs. Dalloway" (PG-13. 97) Vanessa Redgrave ENC 6:30 Movie Movie: "Raising Arizona (PG-13, '87) Nicolas Cage 9:35 Movie: 1 National Lampoon Animal House (R. 78) John Belushi HBO 6:00 Movie Movie: "Meet the Parents" (PG-13, '00) Robert De Niro, Ben Stiller Six Feet Under 'In the Game' Black and White HBQ2 6:15 Movie Larry Sanders Larry Sanders 9:15 Movie: "3000 Miles to Graceland" (R, '01) Kurt Russell, Kevin Costner HB03 7:00 Movie: "Under Suspicion" (R, '00) Morgan Freeman Movie: "Jade (R, '95) David Caruso, Linda Fiorentino 1 10:45 Movie CIN 5:45 Movie Movie: "X-Men (PG-13, '00) Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart Movie: "Monkeybone" (PG-13, '01) Brendan Fraser CIN2 7:15 Movie: "Romancing the Stone (PG) Movie: "Gossip (R, '00) James Marsden. Lena Headey You Cinderella? Movie TMC 7:00 Movie: "Crocodile Dundee II (PG, '88) Paul Hogan Movie: "In the Company of Men" (R, '97) Aaron Eckhart.

Stacy Edwards 10:45 Movie SHO 6:00 Movie Movie: "The Red Sneakers" 02) Dempsey Pappion, Vanessa Bell Calloway Soul Food Who Do You Know' 10:50 Resurrection STARZ Hollywood OneOne Movie: "The Frighteners (R, '96) Michael J. Fox, Trini Alvarado Movie: "The Caveman's Valentine (R, '01) Samuel L. Jackson By Kevin McDonough United Feature Syndicate Ntw YORK Nothing says "forgettable" like the quaint phrase "UPN mid-season series replacement." Last night, the United Paramount Network trotted out two new series. They repeat tonight. While both "As If" (9 and 57 at 9, TV-14) and "The Random Years" (9 and 57 at 9:30, TV-14) are pretty dreadful, at least "As If strives for originality.

That is, if your idea of fiovelty means stealing a show that has already become a success in the United Kingdom. Like the original on Britain's TV 4, "As If follows six college-age adults as they date, bicker and generally whine and brag about sex. There's the pierced and tattooed Sooz (Emily Corrie), the I-just-found-out-I-was-gay Alex (Robin Dunne), Rob (Chris Engen) the hipster, Jamie (Derek Hughes) the goofball, Sasha (Tracie Thorns) the drama queen, and Nicki (Adrienne Wilkinson) the shallow man-eater. Every week, a single camera will follow the gang, focusing on just one character's story. Like the recent adaptations of "Cracker," "Cold Feat," and "Queer as Folk," "As If suffers from Americanization.

As fans of "Masterpiece Theatre" know, British performers are still allowed to look like normal human beings. Series shot in Los Angeles; tend to draw from a talent pool that Baltimore-based director John Waters once described as "ludicrously good-looking." As a result, "As If unfolds like some horrible fashion show or an audition for an MTV video. Fancy camera work and thumping music obscure almost every conversation and ruin any chances for character development. I developed a headache watching "As If." Meanwhile, on "The Random Years," three bachelors live in a Manhattan loft roughly the size of an airport hangar. And only one of them seems to have a good job.

This being a sitcom, Alex (Will "Survivor: Africa" outcast appear on "The Late, Late Show with Craig Kilborn" (CBS 2,3 and 22 at Jeremy Irons and David Feldman appear on "Late Night with Conan O'Brien" (NBC 4,10 and 28 at this live telecast. (Service Electric TV-2 at 7) Valley Arts. This month's features include interviews with Curlee Raven Holton, curator of "Artists and the Art of the Book," who discusses the exhibit and the work of Lafayette College's Experimental Printmaking Institute, Easton, where he's director. Diane LaBelle, curator of the recent "Hans Moller: Works on Paper," talks about the exhibit, and the Binney Smith Gallery at the Banana Factory, of which she is the director. Also, Larry Miley, proprietor of the Moller Estate, comments on the late Lehigh Valley artist.

"Hans Moller: Purveyor of Color, The Essence of a Vision 1943-1995" continues through April 14 at Ursinus College's Berman Museum of Art, Collegeville. And in the "Artist's Studio" segment, Holton discusses, his work, recently seen at Lafayette College's David A. Portlock Black Cultural Center, Easton. Carrie Spell, Black Cultural Center director, talks about the center. Paul Willistein hosts.

(RCN TV-4 at 7:30) Lehigh Valley Crossfire. "A Nation Still at War Must We Capture Bin Laden to Win?" Is the international coalition doing its share to help with this war and can we win without capturing Bin Laden? Panelists John Brinson and attorney Daylin Leach debate these and other questions on tonight's telecast. Moderated by Joe 1 Daddona. (RCN TV-4 at 8) Best of Lehigh Valley Crossfire. "The War on Radical Islamic Terrorism What Must Be Done to Succeed?" Panelists include John Brinson and attorney Daylin Leach.

(R) (Service Electric TV-2 at 8) Americana Outdoors. (Service Electric TV-2 at 8:30) The Wrestling Room. (RCN TV-4 at 9) SCHEDULE CHANGES The following program changes were made after Channel Choices' press time. 8:00 p.m. 4,10,28 Ed.

See McDonough column for episode change. (1 hr.) 9:00 p.m. 2,3 Survivor: Marquesas. Repeat telecast of last week's premiere episode replaces "The King of Queens" and "Yes, Dear" at 9:30. (R) (1 hr.) 10:00 p.m.

UNI Don Francisco Presenta. Casimiro, Chela Santamaria, Charlie Zaa Cecilia Bolocco. This replaces previously scheduled episode. (1 11:30 p.m. COM The Job replaces "Saturday Night Live." (30 mins.) Friedle) runs his own Web site out of the loft.

Wiseman (Joshua Ackerman) finds that his career as a dental assistant makes it hard to pick up babes. Sean Murray plays Todd, the show's resident slacker dude. Too lazy to go to his temp jobs, he watches a lot of cartoons. He's so indolent that Alex hires his own temp, Casey (Natalia Cigliuti, seen last month on El's "Romantic Comedy to work for him. She immediately moves down the hall, and they all become "Friends." When this show is canceled, and that should be soon, Cigliuti should audition for "Sex and the City" as Charlotte's younger sister.

She bears an uncanny resemblance to Kristin Davis. OTHER HIGHLIGHTS Scheduled on "60 Minutes II" (CBS 2,3 and 22 at 8): Mel Gibson discusses "We Were thousands of Americans lose their retirement money. Ed helps a pushover attorney battle a trucking firm that has been sending its rigs through Stuckeyville on "Ed" (NBC 4,10 and 28 at 8, TV-PG). After a burglary, Bernie goes security crazy on "The Bernie Mac Show" (Fox 5 and 29 at 9, TV-PG, L). On the eve of losing her medical license, the First Lady has a birthday celebration that proves memorable on "The West Wing" (NBC 4,10 and 28 at 9, TV-14).

McNeil's mistress tricks him into meeting her parents on "The Job" (ABC 6,7 and 16 at 9:30, TV-14, Scheduled on "48 Hours" (CBS 2,3 and 22 at 10): Viewers choose the outcome of four controversial cases. A New Age therapy kills a young girl on "Law Order" (NBC 4,10 and 28 at 10, TV-14). Scheduled on "2020 Downtown" (ABC 6,7 and 16 at 10): Out-of-control police dogs; an interview with Jennifer Garner. SERIES HIGHLIGHTS Fox shows are new Spring fever on "That '80s Show" (Fox 5 and 29 at 8, TV-PG, D-L) A lesson in gluttony on "My Wife and Kids" (ABC 6,7 and 16 at 8, TV-PG, L) The crew infiltrate an Earth-like planet on "Enterprise" slump, the result of putting too much emphasis on milking "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire" for everything it was worth and too little on creating fresh, family-oriented comedies. ABC's present primetime schedule is a millstone around the necks of its affiliates' late local news.

The solution, in the alleged minds of ABC-Disney suits, was to seduce Letterman away from CBS, whack both "Night-line" and "Politically Incorrect" and watch young adults flock back to the "TV Is Good" network. Obviously, these guys have been drizzling crack dust on their Chilean sea bass. We like Letterman, and he's been a source of good-humored wisdom since 9-1L But a dude-and-midriff magnet? I don't think so. Maybe Jon Stewart But not a 54-year-old guy who still plays like your quirky uncle. The insult to Koppel, who has produced consistently thorough journalism longer than anyone in the TV news business today, with the exception of maybe Mike Wallace, is astonishing.

But to you the public, it is a valuable object ABC goofs with Koppel-Letterman swap (UPN 9 and 57 at 8, TV-PG) Jen spins spooky yarns as a late-night DJ on "Dawson's Creek" (WB and 17 at 8, TV-PG, D-L) Lily gets caught with hooch at a school dance on "Grounded For Life" (Fox 5 and 29 at 8:30, TV-PG) A high-blood-pressure scare on "According to Jim" (ABC 6,7 and 16 at 8:30, TV-PG) "Survivor: Marquesas" is repeated (CBS 2,3 and 22 at 9, TV-PG, L) Mimi apologizes on "The Drew Carey Show" (ABC 6,7 and 16 at 9, TV-PG, D-L-V) A killer stalks the island, again, on "Glory Days" (WB 11 and 17 at 9, TV-PG, L-V) Group therapy on "Titus" (Fox 5 and 29 at 9:30, TV-14, D-L-S). NIGHT TALK Cate Blanchett and naturalist Timothy Treadwell appear on a repeat "Late Show with David Letterman" (CBS 2,3 and 22 at Jay Leno hosts Ron Howard, Steve Irwin and the Blind Boys of Alabama on "The Tonight Show" (NBC 4,10 and 28 at Bill Maher hosts Brad Blanton and Lori Waters on "Politically Incorrect" (ABC 6,7 and 16 at Ron Howard, Teresa Cooper and lesson in the attitudes and economies driving the new mega-conglomerate media structure. The unequivocal message here is that Disney sees no more value in the prestige and credibility Koppel and "Night-' line" bring its sprawling empire than the tchotchke-filled Disney Stores cluttering every mall in the country. There are plenty of media managers (and corporate shareholders) who see nothing there to argue with. Profits and share price are the only value worth worshipping.

The only real measure of success. "Quality journalism" is a boring abstraction for wonks to haggle about at their dreary conferences. Old-line journalists have argued for years that news divisions should be held to a separate budgetary standard and that profits from the parent company's amusement parks, movie studios and primetime sitcoms should be bean-counted to cover likely losses on straight news, particularly in times like these, when important news is happening, at great expense, on the other side of the planet. But those voices are older. VALLEY VIEWING For local sporting events check the "TV Dial" in the daily Morning Call sports section.

Health Images. Host Dr. Sue discusses surgery with ENT physician Dr. Andrew Wakstein, D.O. (R) (Blue Ridge TV-13 at 9:30 a.m.; repeated at 4:30) Pocono Medical Center Auction.

Doctors and community officials are on hand during this fund-raising event that helps to raise money to benefit the medical center. The live, four-hour telecasts continue throughout the week. (Blue Ridge TV-13 beginning at 6) Train Time. (RCN TV-4 at 6:30) TV 2 News. (Service Electric TV-2 at 6:30) Computerwise.

Hosts George and Asa answer viewer questions during IWY.W it 11 Bob D'Amko Associated Press Nightline' host Ted Koppel weaker and fewer every year. Moreover, the hot trend growth sector in television "news" is in ranting, self-aggrandizing cartoon acts. Ratings show shouting and WWF-style confrontation are far more popular and profitable with certain types of viewers (although almost none of them young). Koppel is reportedly poker-faced about his reaction to this insult and what exactly he'll do if ABC follows through. Letterman, meanwhile, is said to be telling ABC's brain wizards that he won't move to them if it means or even appears to mean whacking Koppel.

ABC couldn't have screwed up worse if it tried. has moved on on FX's "The Shield." Ian Gomez is also in talks to join the cast of a new series, although the details are not yet available. In the meantime, he can be seen in Alanis Moris-sette's newest video, "Hands Clean." Every Friday 6th Year 8:05 A.M. WGPA Radio 1100 AM 7 Ai IV. J- Bruce E.

Davis, Esq. "The Lehigh Valley Means Business" March 8 Michael Kaiser Lehigh Valley Planning Commission March 15 Tony Hanna City of Bethlehem AGERE Systems St Luke's Hospital Partners for a greater Lehigh Valley Ail: Cast of felicity' Zap2it.com LOS ANGELES While "Felicity" may be dead, don't expect its stars to just go away anytime soon. Scott Foley has landed the lead NBC's pilot "AUSA," a single-camera comedy. This time, Foley gets to play Ben, an eager young lawyer just starting his career as a prosecutor in the U.S. Attorney's Office in Manhattan in the series from Rich Appel.

The series was inspired by Appel's first job after he left Harvard Law School. Appel eventually left New York's U.S. Attorney's Office to pursue a writing career, first joining the staff of Fox's "The Simpsons," then moving up to an executive producer on "King of the Hill." Meanwhile, the rest of "Felicity's" cast has moved on to other projects as well. Keri Russell can be seen in the film "We Were Soldiers," opposite Mel Gibson, while Scott Speed-man has recently agreed to star in the independent film, "My Life with Me." Greg Grunberg plays a recurring character on "Alias" (as does former Hannah por-trayer Jennifer Garner), while Tangi Miller is doing the same By Brian Lambert Knight Ridder Newspapers This Friday, Ted Koppel will be at Elks Lodge 878 in Queens, N.Y. Not to sing the secret Elks song and hoist a few before last call but to moderate one of "Nightline's" town meetings, this one on the subject of "Homeland Security.

At Any Cost" That is, if he doesn't quit first. iThe present situation, where ABC has, in one stunningly inept move, managed to blew off two of its own feet with a single shot, ranks as Ofle of the most colossal management botches in media history. Somebody at ABC clearly thought they were on to a world-class coup with their secret "negotiations" to steal David Letterman away from CBS and drop him into Koppel's "Nightline" slot. But oddly, for the first time in media history, the secret got out, and well before anyone had a chance to tell either Koppel, the "Nightline" staff or even ABC News president David Westin. ABC is presently mired in a nearly catastrophic ratings.