WEDNESDAY, MAT 81, 1998 •LTTHEVILLI! (ARK.)' COURIER NEWS PAGE OUT QUR WAY By J. R. Williams Our Boarding House with Moj. Hoople OH. MO, SIR—WE NEVER. EVEN THOUGHT Of LOOKKJ IN YOUR BATHROOM WINDOW/ VMHEM I SAIP'FUNNEL: THIS CORNER, 6IR ROSCOB BAROM OP TU& BARON is ^EARNS THE FAMILY CROJN, HAMD6D .DOWN FROMTW6 'OLD IRISH KINGS/ WITH HIM IS HIS MAUAGER.MAOO HOOPle. FAMOUS IRISH 6TATE6MftM, viMoee STATUE STAWDS CORK. AWT. THAT BAti MEWS AMTIQUE MUG? HE LOOK fJATORAL &TAWDIIJS UP: WHEW WE LAU6HEP ABOUT BALP HEAPS AM' SCRAWWV YEAH, AM THAT'S HOOW.6, OMB OF tuoee FALLEM ARCHES OF E OVOLS CLU8 A. DREAM WORLD WMCT Television on Wednesday 1:30 p.m.—Headlines 1:40—News Summary IMS—MlrtSoulli News 2:00—Berle Olsw;inger 2:30—Fashion Parade 3:00—Jr. Disc Jockey .1:30—Howdy Dondy 4:00—Cactus Jim 4:30—Hello, Ladies 6:00—Kukla, Fran .V Ollie 5:30—HoberLi Quintan 5:45—News Caravan .,6:00—Film Fcjiturelle ! :30—Steps to Stardom :00—Television Theater :00—Break the Bank :30—Arthur Godfrey i:30—Holiday Hotel l:00—News 1:05—Starlet Revue '« offer complete Television irvlce. . supplj-inc and install- iff General Kleirtric, Motorola, nd Capehart models. COR FREE ESTIMATES TEIEVI5IONS RADIO / 5AIES AND SERVICE | BlYTHEVlUESAlEsC<» 38 E MAINST BIYTHEVILIE ARK Rent A Car... Drive It Yourself t Fresh Crappie Chicken Dinner Package Delivery Anywheri Simpson's Cafe STATE LINE Phones 4918 - 937 FKECKLES AND HIS FRIENDS BY MERRILL BLOS6K1 Invisible Remedy? ' Ive PIJT EIV/OCO UWOER Ay OXYG YOU APPROVE?, DfXTOR f Corrugated Metal Culverts Sizes up to 84 In. Automatic Flood Gates Concrete Culvert Tile Sizes up to 3G In. Concrete Septic Tanks Metal Septic Tanks Scivcr Tile Ktst Prices «'e Deliver A. H, WEBB ij 61 at Stale I.tne Phone 1H LOANS CARS, TRUCKS Real Estate & FIIA United Insurance Agency A. f. (Dee) Dietrich, M)cr. 1st & Main—Rear Cily Dras "lylhcrille, Ark. BILL GODWIN SPORTING GOODS Swim Pr links 2.05. Tennis Raguets Caps of all kinds Jimmie "t!" Boats $50 liascball & Softball Uniforms, all prices, Icllering All types Summer Ath- Icic Equipment. "If It's Sporting Goods, Sec Us." 121 W. Alain Ph. 6762 By Grace Nies Fletcher .Copyright 1950 S»mc«. lr>c. i i I F Ihe lovely young Mrs. Milliadcs Grown, I'ormcrly of ML Vernon Street, Beacon Hill, Boston, and more recently ol llic Splendide A.p;u-t- ments, Prospect Park, Brooklyn, had learned to cook before slie was married, slie might never have known, outside of the movies, how one glance al the wrong end of a gun can turn your mouth drier tlmn a sailed codlisli; and certainly her bridegroom of four months would never have met Lieutenant McGunn of Homicide. It's funny how things work out; a moron writes a cookbook and so I wo people die, but not from what they ate. The cookbook explicitly said in small, firm print: "Cut holes with a knife in the lop pie crust." Why didn't it tell brides the really important I things, such ns, "Be. sure to check all knives before putting them away in the drawer, ,so they cannot he used for sticking into someone"? Nnt thnt you would expect such a thing to happen at the Splendide. It was a very swanky address across Eighth Avenue from the Park, with a big blond doorman named Eric who, draped with more ;gold brnid than an admiral ot the JNavy, paraded over the huge-hush oriental rugs in tile fretted in ble lobby. "Goodticss, can we afford the Taj Mahal, darling?" Gloria had gasped after one look. "How wonderful to hear the birds sing, right in the city!" "Our apartment isn't exaclly on the Park," Miitiades murmured uneasily. It most definitely was not. It turned out to be two and a half rooms on the court where only fire escapes sprouted and the only bird Gloria ever heard was the parrot the woman across the court put out on her fire escape every morning to bathe and which sang appropriately and monotonously over and over, "I'm forever blowing bubbles!" (Occasionally he varied this by squawking, "Help!") The bedroom was barely as large as Gloria's clothes closet back on ML Vernon Street, and the kitchenette was so tiny you had to step out into the living room to open the oven door. But the Splendide was near enough the Eighth Avenue subway so thnt Milliades could commute rapidly to Manhattan where he was, as yet, a very junior executive, and whose chief aim was to finish his busy work al the office and get home as fasl as possible to his beautiful bride Gloria. "And don't worry about your Job — it't being handled , psrftctly by your iwritaryl" MR. DILL,I FEAR Wff UAVe A VERY SICK FISH MERE / J. REC- OMMCMD Gt-UCOSE--- IWJKJCD INTRAVENOUSLY/ PRISOII.l.A'S Gloria didn't know who Hved above or below her . . . hut onc« she caught a xlltnpse of the people who lived next door. black hair and his marvelous tan. "No, he's not in but I'm your father's secretary. Could 1 take a message?" "I think," said Milliades, "I'll slick around." Gloria was a cule little Irick who had to look up to his six- feet-two, but though she was only five feet nothing, she had everything else, such as jade-green eyes thai promised tilings, hair the delicious color of Golden Bantam corn that made your mouth water, a tiny perfect figure your hands ached to curl around, and brains he was smart enough to hide. "Well, Sergeant Drown?" she miled teasingly when lie had flushed faking this all in. Call him Miitiades," he had insisted; when he said it, and for the firsl time le could forgive his Pop. "I think it is a very cute name!" he retorted indignantly. "Dignified and yet—cr—tripping. Its adences go so well with Brown. What I mean is, it's so killer-dil- er distinctive." She added menally: -"Mrs. Milliades Brown, immm?" And so they were married. JVTILTIADES has never forgiv 1>A his father, Prof. John Nei iven Nemo Brown, head ot the classical drama department at one of those big universities which infest Boston worse than fleas, for naming him after one of the more famous Athenian generals. "I wish Pop had to fight all the first grade, the big dope!" he tolc his mother after his first day ai public school while she wiped off enough blood and dirl to be sure he was hers. His hatred for al brass was further intensified 03 being a Gl in Battery A during th< recent unpleasantness, so he wa: ' scowling when he arrived home . from Germany and strode into hi I father's oEllcc. j "Is Pop in?" he asked the scc- i rctary and then his eyes widened ! to take In Gloria sitllng there at • her typewriter with a dimple going ' in and out al the corner of her : luscious red mouth. "You must be Miltiadcs!" Gloria herself was an anachronism, a S'rl who could take ler educalion or leave it. Believe t or not, she wore very hlgh- iccled shoes in spite ot being Phi Beta Kappa from Radclifle Col- egc, which was why she got her ob with Professor Brown in the trst place. After three years what she did not know about the origin ol early "reek and Roman drama would go on the head of a pin, and she called W. Shakespeare affectionately "Willy." Hut her vocabulary of slang was equally extensive and the way she scattered it here and there among the classics added piquancy to her remarks. But she hod one big drawback as a wife; she could not make a knife and broke the dish instead. It's the sieve," Milliodcs comforted her, remembering something he'd once heard his mother say. "You have to get used to it. Why bake anyway with a bakery just around the corner?" he asked hopefully. "Goodness, I wouldn't let an old pie lick me!" Gloria reproached him. "Just you wait, my doubting Miitiades." 4 • • PRIVATELY she thought he might be right; It was such a lillle stove sitting that way n top of the Icebox; but though tic kept on trying, day after day. lie couldn't seem to get the com- >ination and all her effort* came q an untimely end In the garbage }ail. She was too proud lo offer Vliltiades anything short ot per- eclion, after the crack about the 'akery. "If only," she thought wistfully, *I had some older woman to ask vhat I do wrong!" But she didn't know a living :oul in Brooklyn, except the cock- oach in her sink, and even he cultled away at her coming. There must have been 300 people in the apartment, living under the same oof, but the only one who ever spoke to her was Eric, the doorman, to inquire magnificently 'Would Modom like a taxi?" when he knew perfectly well that all anyone could afford who lived In Apartment 7B was the subway. Sometimes after not saying » syllable aloud all day, Gloria was so lonesome she could have screamed. Even your neighbors coming up In the gilt, mirrored elevator .with you either tilted their noses as it you were merely a bad smell or looked righi through three of you in the mirrors. It gave you an uncanny feeling, wondering if you were really there. Gloria did not have the faintest breathed, throwing admiring shoulders, his hlj pastry. She excused this lack the culinary art reasonably to Milliades before their wedding. "You'd never ask a businessman 'Can you bake a pie?' So why businesswoman? Besides, anyon who can read Greek in the origina ought lo be able lo knead up a tasty crust in no time." "Of course. Sweet," agreed Mil tiadcs kissing the dimple in the corner ot her fascinating cherry ripe lips. But if you knead pic crust, i very shortly resembles somcthin the Dodgers could well use a ba upon, as Gloria found out the firs morning after their honeymoo: when Miitiades left her reluct.inlly to go \o the oillce. "But I did exaclly what it said in the book!" Gloria wailed, torn . - -. , discus- | between tears and laughter when Idea who lived above or below her. though she could hear them taking baths and bawling onl their wives, but one evening she did catch a glimpse of the people who lived next door, when she and Milliadcs were coming home unexpectedly late. They looked foreign, rather tike interesting foreigners, she noticed while Miltiadcs was tumbling foi his key. The woman, ample ol bosom, with carefully colftcd hair wore a blank velvet evening capi and the man's evening clothe* were expensive, loo. but there was something odd about him, Gloria decided, scanning hif long, swarthy face which had a while scar on the left check. And then Gloria realized what was wrong. His green felt hat was decidedly out of place with a din- smooth 'they tried to cut her first pie with | ner jacket (To Kt Continued) FOR SALE Onerctc cnlrtrtl 12 Inch U « Inch, pUIn ei recnforced Alto C«ncrel« Building Blocks cheaper th»n litntKi (01 harm chicken hnisn. fump honwt. lentnl honsei loci ihf.)» We deliver Call ii t.r Ire* Mtlmatc. OSCEOLA TILE & CULVERT CO. m Chamblin Sales Co. • Sales & Service • "Your Friendly Studebaker Dealer" RAILROAD & ASH PHONE 6888 you MEAN lAOU CANTT EVEN ME WHEN COLUMBUS DISCOVERED AMERICAT VIC FLINT Reason for Fright HY MICHAEL O'MAI.LEY and RALPH LANH WE'VE BEEN OUTSMARTED AGAIN- 8ULUT WE HOPED TOflND IS SOME NEXT TIME.AIEC9 THE NEXT TIME YOU MAY BE DEAD. DARUMG, I'M SCARED. RIGHT. WANT SCOUT ABOUND A BIT, ANY WAV. 1 6IJESS WE AU. ARE—.A LITTLE. BUT THAT DOSS!-!'! MEAN WE'RE GOING TO STOP flSHIING, DOES IT? 1 THINK BOBBY AND I'LL BACK 10 THE HOUSE, ssr YOU LATER CAPTAIN EASY Jtisl in Time HY LESLIE TURNER HURR.V,MC.COBB!MIEV, WHATS AIL THE ) NO TIME TO | GET ALL nlECOW-VEXCItEMEUr. ICK?/EXPLAlM MOWll THEM EUSV MAV HfWE WE'VE GOT TO START KT ONCE l MAUDS TO RIPE 1H>,'J THAT COUMIRV NOETH OF HERELIU HH CAR... WE OOTT/\— .HOLY SMOKE, IT'S E&SV1 JUGS BUNNY Fooled Ai;:iin YIPE! WHAT'S TH«T TH' STREET, PORKYT IT'S TERRIBLE/ I'M RETURNING (T i GET MY MOKsy »A,CK; ALLEY OOI> A I!i( of Ciipor HAMLIN THIS MUST BE THE BOX, ~ SAO He HURT FOOJ ON... AND HE HASP MO WONDEB ^L BCNES.' \KICKED THE BOX... JUST SOMEAir HE EXPECTED DUSTY OLO ) TREASURE... BONES.' i^^Ji^K^.x >g%^5^-:.?X->:.- r ..' HOOTS ANT) FIKK ICDGAR MARTIN J.
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