The Oshkosh Northwestern from Oshkosh, Wisconsin • Page 3

a NOW FOR COOL DRINKS. THE DAILY NORTHWESTERN. OSHKDSQ. WEDNESDAY. JUNE 23, 1897.

I Who COULD DO NO BUSINESS. FAIR STOCKHOLDERS POCKETED BY RESOLUTION AND. STATUTE. WHILE THE SENATE WRESTLES WITH opened, ttal' ft Goddess. 18721897 SILVER JUBILEE SALE Will be Continued This Week.

25 Years of Unparalleled Success in the CLOTHING BUSINESS. 25 Years Since our Advent in the CLOTHING BUSINESS. Trulu the Greatest Moneij Saving Event OUR STORES. Oshkosh, Wis. Applcton, Wis.

Sheboygan, Wis. Here Is a List ot Jubilee Baroalns, WMcH Comes but Silver Jubilee Bargains in Boys' and Gti wren's Suits A blot to mothers and father. It lll Interest you to see the won derful values we will give In Young Men's, Hoys' and Children's faults and Trousers durlns our Jubilee Sale. Reefer, Junior and Double lireasted Suits, about 500 to choose from, a big variety In every site, everyone pure wool and fast color; small sizes are nicely trimmed. Ages 3 to 10 years.

Our jubilee sale price $1.98 Our jubilee sale 2.48 Our jubilee sale price. 2.98 Our Jubilee sale price. 3.48 Our Jubilee sale 3.88 Our jubilee sale 4.48 Bous' Knee Pants Suits Ages 9 Our jubilee Our jubilee Our jubilee Our Jubilee Our jubilee Our Jubilee Our Jubilee Our Jubilee Our jubilee Our Jubilee Our Jubilee to 10. sale price sale sale salo sale price sale price sale sale sale price sale price sale prlco $1.19 1.39 148 1.69 1.98 2.48 2.98 3.48 3.98 4.4$ 4.98 Continental. THE TARIFF.

Tanks of Delightful Beverages-The Out look Is That the Tariff 1)111 Will Pass the Senate About July 0. Impressions of Nashville. Washington, D. June 23. Hot woather Is helping the Republicans push the tariff btlL For some days the national capital bas been sizzling.

In the senate chamber and in the hall of the house when the lower branch is in session men are seen with fans in their hands. Many of the statesmen wear linen and duck and white flannel suits. Outing shirts are in favor, too, and one member of the house, Mr. Moody Of Massachusetts, has boon seen on the floor in his bicycling outfit. Down in the basement of the capital tho engineers have to keep up steam for the purpose of pumping cold air into the halls of legislation overhead.

Common, everyday air la not considered good enough for tho na tional legislators. Tholr supply is run through cooling pipes before it Is pumped into tho tubes which discharge directly undorneath the chairs in which greatness sits. To Cool Heated Brains. In the senate the annual supply of apol- linarls lemonade bag made its appearance. In each cloakroom, one on the Democrat lo and the other on the Republican side, big tanks are kept constantly llllcd with this delightful beverage.

In distribution of the luxuries of the season the senate management is nonpartisan. This lomonade bill is paid out of the contingent fund of the senate and it amounts to a pretty penny. three years ago, when congress was in session nearly all summer on the tariff hill of 1804, the cost of lemonade, mineral wa ter and similar luxuries consumed in the senate cloakrooms was between and $7,000. The hot weather and tho discom fort which Is brings are hastening to a conclusion the work of this congress, and If apolllnaris lemonade will help to secure early adjournment, probably tho taxpayer will not crumble at the expense. The understanding in both branches of congress and among the leaders of both parties is that as soon as the tariff bill Is disposed of an adjournment will be taken.

Various other legislative projects have been talked of. Some have thought the annexation treaty with Hawaii might be taken up and disposed of before adjournment. Others have proposed that the president should send in a message favoring the creation of a commission to inves tigate tho Currency and banking subject, and to report at next winter session, But the leaders tell me it is useless to think of doing anything of the sort. As soon as tho tariff is a law congress will adjourn in a twinkling. They say it would be impossible to keep a quorum here or to do any business.

The senators and repre sentatives are eager to get home. The Outlook. Today the outlook ia that the tariff bill will pass the senate about the 6th of July, It may be day or two earlier; certainly not many aays later. In a week or ton days it is believed the amendments put upon it by the senate can bearrangod with the house of representatives. This is called the conference work.

Each branch appoints a committee of conferees to meet together and arrange the differences. The conferees get together, nx up compromises. and then report to their respective bouses for instruction. If they aro accepted by both sides, well and good; the thing is done. If either house rejects, the conferees have to arrange a new basis of compro mise.

It is an axiom among experienced legislators that a conference committee is the place to legislate. There is where the sharp workers have an advantage. Con ference reports are often adopted rather carelessly by the senate or house, particu larly the house, and items sometimes creep into bills in the most inexplicable and eiir prising manner. An old lobbyist once told me that it used to be a favorite trick of his class years ago to pass an innocent sort of bill through one house, then through the other with some trilling amendment, and then to "fix" the conference committee so that A would really introduce now legislation, which would be allowed to slip through unnoticed. Not so much of this is done nowadays.

In fact, the wholo tone of legislative work Is higher than it was 20 years ago. Since his return from his trip to the Nashville exposition President McKinley has been warm In his praises of the south' ern people and of the manner in which they roceived him. His heart was really touched by the warmth of their welcome. "The audience which I addressed on the exposition grounds in Nashville," the pros ldent told a member of the cabinet who was not on the journey, "was the finest audience I ever spoke to that is, it was most perfectly and completely an Amer lean audience. Not 1 per cent of the people present were anything but native Americans, and most of them could date their ancestry back through many genera tions of Americans.

It is only in the south that we find these all American gatherings of people." Southern Enterprise. Nashville bas impressed itself tipon the president as a wonderfully enterprising city. Mr. McKinley took occasion to tell all his frjrndaof the surprising extent and beauty of the exposition and to praiso tho people of the south for their pluck and tenacity. It docs not look much like hard times when tho people of a oity like Nash vllle will go ahead and spend $760,000 in an exposition right in the face of the cry of hard times.

The president thinks the people are not suffering as much from the hard times as they think they are, just as they were not as prosperous in the boom days os they belioved they were. Tho most they need now, in his opinion, Uosnndonoe in themselves and the future. Nushvillo has become eclobratod in the national capital as the city which contains a creator number of beautiful women than any other American oity in proportion to its population. All the presidential party noticed this1. From the president down they talked about the amazing number of pretty women to be seen there.

At every turn one came upon a vision of true worn anly loveliness. "Human roses bloomed on every bush," as one pootio oabinot otli oer expressed it. One is not surprised that the population of Nashvillo has increased so rapidly, for every northern man who goes down there wants to stay and find himself a bride. WALTER WELLMAK, It is by prosence of mind in untried emergencies that the native metal of man is tested. James Russell Lowell.

FROM LOWELL, MASS. The Home of Hood's Sarsaparilla- A Wonderful Cure. "A swelling as big as a large marble came under my tongue. Physicians said it was a semi-transparent tumor and must be operated upon. I felt I could not stand it, and as spring came began to take my favorite spring tonic, Hood's Sarsaparilla, The bunch gradually decreased and finally disappeared.

I have bad no sign oi its re' turn. I am glad to praise Hood's Sarsapa' rilla." Mrs. H. M. Coburn, 8 Union St, Lowell.

Mass. Get HOOD'S, Hood's Pills ova Blok Headache, aso. I Once a rich man had a beautiful Image. It had been bronght from afar and was a marvel of perfect form. The flosh was lightly tinted in wonderful colors, touched with soft gleams Of pale gold.

It was the statue of a goddess. So great was the worship of Sims for the divine In art. for the outward shoDlna of a beautiful 6oul, that ho ralsecTan altar to his goddess. Ho may not hove offered pagan sacrifices to bcr, being a reasonable man, but he built a templo to hold bis reasuro, and tho shrine was mmlo lovely by painters and grovors, by naturo, too, for clematis and climbing roses leaned through the arohes of tho sacrod place. when Sllus had leisure from his duties as a rich tuun or from nis sruuies as a wise one, he spent hours in admiring his are treasure.

It may be wondered wheth- the goddess cared what he felt or whether she missed the substantial gifts she had been accustomed to in former times. So far ns her foellngs may bo imagined, thoy must bo narrated. Thus it was easy to see that she oared nothing for the vul gar details of life, She was Indeed fur above the common. Whether in her old life, when sho was worshiped by multitudes, she feasted in secret upon the offer ings laid before her, it was sure now that she never thought of food and the preparation thereof or troubled hersolf about garments. These facts would show that she was above most women, and Silas loved bet for it.

Being no god himself, but a man, Silas was Dot always at her sldo or on a pedestal. Yet in his absence he left tho temple generously opon. Ihe goddess, though not of heroio proportions, was safe on her throne, and Silas felt that the wide door was a companion to the wlndowless arches. From it the goddess could look out on the highroad, and in turn those faring along the way might stop for a rest. What wonder, then, that many came to look at the lofty Imager Some spoke of whether she wore worthy of hor place or not.

Those were they who must cavil. Some looked with Curiosity and were un knowing. There were fow who eared to oonio again. This proves that Silas was an uncommon man. Every one llkos best his own treasure and defends Its value.

So Silos folt through his wholo being the worth of pis goddoss, for ho owned her, and he was a good man and placed no other gods before her. In a tragedy without appeal even riches do not help. A statue cannot dlo, but that Is because it may be Immortal. For the 6ccond time in her long life tho goddess was taken from her shelter. The first time her divinity was lost.

This time it was her bodv. Fato had brought her out of a dim past, out of the old careless days of cheerful gods. Now fate had circum scribed her; still divine, to be Just, but a slave a royal slave. Ah, the goodness of her owner, bis wisdom, his constancy, did not avalL The tragedy was without appeal. For one day a wanderer came by a worthless singer, who amused children and mndo toys and the goddess caino down from ber resting plooo as at a command.

It was not known for a time with whom she went away, though Felix, the trifling wayfarer, was believed to be the one and got much blame. She must have learned to speak, for when he looked at her with pleased eyes in the temple that day while be ate bis crust she signified to him that she was tired of being perfect. From having the outward form of a woman very likely she had come to be a woman, so that It had grown troublesome for ber to try to be as calm, as uncaring, as far above feeling, as she had seemed. When, therefore, the mountebank Felix eazed upon her with a smile of delight; noted her shape, better even than he could carve in a doll when ho with carelessness touched her body, having no straining for reverence in his heart, then indeed the goddess was stirred. More than that, she moved and held out her bands.

She did this timidly and childishly In spite of her great age, for she had never done it before at least not since those grandes passions in the great past, when she had no soul and they were very differ ent, besides being half forgotten. She did cot think of her soul now, I imagine. As for the tramp, he had the soul of a child. Ilo was happy from day to day, even from hour to hour. Tbe past his little past weighed naught with hlra, and the future was unfeit.

It may have boon a fit union when they went forth together, for neither oared for tho material sucooss of life. She was more contented in being a toy than she had ever been as a great work of ort or as a revered aoddess. partly because she no longer cored for those shadowy hordes, partly because the compelling touch of her maker was forgotten. And this man painted her afresh to sit his taste. He gavo ber more fleshy tones, and he trimmed her with ribbons.

Once, when he had so much gold, he even gilded ber in funtastio fashion on the hair, on the soft surfaces of her shoulders and thighs, where sho hud been so faintly gilt She loved tho caressing and tbe play. Having forgotten she was a goddoss, she did much as women do, and a sad state of things came to pass. She let Felix put her into his shelter, whioh was a mere hut. Not at all like the marble and silver temple was tho hut, though this lover of the fields and bypaths had it bright with vagrant bloom and woody vines. Within it was bare and opt to be dark when the sun did not shine.

And tho.mountobank went his way, wandering as over. Sometimes he would come back and find the goddess in a sad mood. This did not make hlra as pleasant as when her Warm hues were not 'hid in gloom. Ho wished her to bo at his coin' ing as the morning glory whon morning comes. But she was not a flower; she was a woman scarcely even a goddoss any more.

So tho maker of conceits went his way, and his light hoart led him many a care less ehase, and tho goddess grew less and less a toy, for her tawdry Colors were ma- in 2. At last, after a long journoy, Felix thought of his hut. He was tired. He turned back with a pack full of nice things gathored on the way. Ho hud gold in a bag and wine in a skin.

Ho thought of his toy goddess with longing, and more and more he thought or ner neanng nome. Throuah the dusk as he passed, peering fat up through the grove on the slope, he thought ho caught a glimpse oi ncr paleness. So, though the dew was heavy and a mist crawling up, he strode upward to ward the eloarolna thing. There she lay broken, washed of her color by the damp. Sho was a woman no innro.

nor a tov. but from the ruin of her still shone iireat beauty over the frag ments. Nothing could hinder henceforth the dlvinenoss tif hor soul. She might be forovormore a goddess. New York Sun.

llcr Birthplace. "Strange story that of the Georgia girl who carried a splinter in ber foot 44 years, and then bad it work out in a pocrlfled state." "Petrified, did yon sayf" "Yes." "I'll bet anything tbe girl was originally from Boston." Cleveland Plain Dealer MIRES' Rootbeert Tbe popping of a cork from a bottle of Hires is a signal of pood health and nlca- 0 sure. A sound me old folks like to bear the children can't resist it. HIRES! Rootbeer Is composed of the very Ingredient (lie svilem requires. Aiding the digestion, mi liing the nerves, purifying the Mood.

A temper-auce drink for teiuptir-auee people." Mail. onljF by I Tkl Chirln B. Ulfw PblU. -i 4 pkfkWT 6 mieu. DR.

WILLIAMS' PINK PILLS for PALE PEOPLE Nwm toni(-Bloo1 Mkf. Rnrt fn? 4flcrlp-tite ptuiphlet. 8id 1.7 dromtitu 6017 where. id rwritfl boi ii tr I2.fiu. Da.

Wamsi" Mfi. Brhrnn-udr, N. T. SjUUIMIIIIIIIIUIIIIHIIIIIIIIIMIIIHIimHUIHIUIIIUIIIHIUIIIUIli Gold Dust Washing Powdir makes house cleaning easy. Largest package greatest economy.

Ask the grocer for it, DR. Jt. E. BARNETT, 117.159 Main Street, Ro'm 12 New England Block. 1 10 lo 12 a.

I to and i p. Honns VOsbkosb Hospital, am -i pm I hundav. lit- IL' a. 4-5 1. m.

Special intention given toditeuses of child ren ona nervous oisrasf s. Residence 22 Jefferson Avenue, Opposite Post OBlce TOM'S SINGULAR DEMISE. Be Waited For "the Boya" to Fix Him Cp Before lie Would Die. For weeks and weeks Tom heppard bad been a sick man at our mining camp al Clack Bear -Everybody felt sorry for him, and yet a sick man in a mining camp was a great lnconvenienoe and burden. One day Judge atkins went up to see bin), and after finding him no bet ter and no worso than he bad been fot many weeks bo said "Tom, I don want to seem cold heart ed about this thing, but the boys are be ginning to wonder why you don't dlo oi net well." ies, recKon tney repuca xom.

'Ana you can toll 'em I goin to die." "D6 you feel it's for the best, Tomr" "1 60. I ain't got rauoh to live fur and might as well peg out now as any otbei time. I've been waltln fur a week oi two." "Wflitln! Fnwhfltf" "Fur to die docently. I'm no lord or duke, but I want things fixed up In good shape. I want to be washed up, shaved.

bev my hair cut and gtt into some decent duds, and I won't die till I do." The judge told tbe boys what was re quired, and that afternoon two or three ol 'em knocked off work and Uzed Tom up, shirt was borrowed of one, a coat of an other, a vest of another, and by and by tho sick man was rigged out In the best the camp afforded. When all this bad been done, be said: "Now, then, I feel moro like dyln, but there's one more thing I want. I want Joe Hillings to come up with bis fidu.t and play a few tunes." Joe was sent for, and after considerable kicking ho got bis fiddle and went up tc Tom's shanty. Tom was propped up In bed and waiting, and Joe sat down and gave him "Tbe Old Oaken Bucket," "Old Folks at Hdine," "Nellie Gray," and holi a dozen other well known airs. He bad been playing for an hour, his eyes on the bills opposite, when Judge Watklns looked In and said "Cut It off, Joel Tom'8dead!" And so he wus, and when tbe boys came to observe the pleased and contented look on his face they were agreed that ho had died decently and been given a fair start on his way.

Louisville Courier -Journal. Foot Weariness. A great many years ago the old fash' loncd back country housekeeper learned that when she had any work to do that in volved a great deal of standing on her feet in one place she was tho gainer by folding a picco of Carpet or a rug and plae ing it on the floor under hor feet. It has taken tbe business men a long time to learn just what a great many ol tne grandmothers and aunties of tmt world knew very long npo namely, that peoplo who stuml in one pli.ee for any length of lime would rave a preat portion of their foot anil leg weariness if they arranged for some thing soft on the floor. One sensible man spread a tin ok coating of tan bark 6n the floor of his warehouse; another used mvv dust and found it a great advoutngo.

Wbero these substances can not be introduced with sofety or convenience a light platform of rather thin boards for the men to stand on lias been found of great value In the saving of strength. In offices whero men are constantly on their feet thick manllla matting is helpful In avoiding that extreme weariness to which active people are subject. Wearing loose shoes with a thick ln-solo of felt is recommended whon floors aro extremely bard and unyielding. A little attention to some of what Appear to be the minor details of life will oftentimes repay the painstaking employer in increased usefulness and the ability to accomplish a greater amount of labor. Kew York Ledger.

He Iidn'( Like Tjler. Among a batch of 6torics attributed to President Lincoln is the following good ono on President Tyler: "During Mr. Tyler's Incumbency of tho office he arranged to make uu excursion in some direction, and sent his son llob to arrange for a special train. It happened that the railroad superintendent was a strong whig. As such he had no favors to bestow on tho president, and informed Bob that his road did not run any special trains for the prosident.

said I3ob, 'did you not furnish a special train tor thefnnoralof President HnrrisonP' said the superintendent, 'aud If you'll bring your father in that condition, you shall have the best train on the Troy Times Professional Contempt, "I hyahs dat do gemman youwucks foh is er line picture painter." "Yaus," replied Erastus Pinkloy. "He kin paint pictures good 'nuff. But yoh orter see do way he done slop do whitewash Broun when be tried ter kalsoiulnu do ceil-in," Washington Star. The Statute Prevented Disbanding Cntll Debts Were Paid, and the Resolution Prevented Any Steps Toward Another Fair, The stockholders of the Fair association held another meeting Tuesday evening but accomplished nothing definite either toward disbanding the association or toward plans for 'holding another fair. Although the meeting had been called for eight o'clock, It was nearly an hour laiter when the secretary announced that a majority of the stock of the association was represented either by the person or proxies of the owners, and that the meeting could now proceed to busi-Hess.

Chairman William Wakeman then called the meeting to order with thirteen stockholders present and 285 shares of stock out of a total of 480 shares represented. The minutes of the previous meeting, at which the resolution Introduced by Col. BouCk, and look-Ins toward the dissolution of the association, were adopted. One clause of this "resolution instructed the directors not to incur further indebtedness other than that necessary in the process of closing the affairs of the association. The statement was also made in last evening's meeting that after the directors had closed the business of the association, and paid all debts, It would require a vote of two-thirds of all the stock to disband the organization.

The situation confronting 'the meeting was this: The Bouck resolution prevented any steps being taken toward holding another fair, as such a move would necessitate incurring indebted ness. The organization could not dis band for the reasons that an Indebtedness of $1,600 was still unpaid, and that two-thirds of the stock was not present. Nothing could lie done except talk, and the various stockholders present ex-pressed their views on the two courses, C. Look and Carlton Foster were in fa vor of disbanding, while J. N.

Hoaglin, Charles Radford and J. C. Davis held to It that a fair could be given this fall and perhaps money could be made. Their plan was to give an agricultural exposition, eliminating gambling, and draw the state money. They held that many of the remaining 'uncollected as another assessment of stock would prob another assesment of stock would prob ably be necessary to wipe out the present indebtedness, and as the members could be held responsible for a farther assessment of 25 per cent only, they might as well run the risk of another fair.

However, under the circumstances nothing could be done at the meeting, and an adjournment for one week was taken. An effort will be made to have two-thirds of the stock represented at the next meeting. ARE POOR LOSERS. Stevens Tolnt Paper Says the Game Wasn't Fair. The Stevens Point Journal gives the following account of the game of ball played Sunday at that city in which the Wisconsin river boys went to earth be tore the boys from Oshkosh.

It Is evident from the tone of the article that the Stevens Point people are hard losers and that they will have to learn miny things about taking defeat gracefully before the season ends: "Nearly 1,500 people Sunday saw the Stevens Point and Oshkosh league team put up the most exciting contest seen on the local grounds for several seasons. Eleven Innings were necessary to decide the struggle, the visitors scoring the decis ive score In the last inning. It was a hard game to lose. The home team out played their opponents at the bat and In the field and under any ordinary cumstances would have won. There were extraordinary circumstances present, however, In the person of Charles Scheel 'who undertook to umpire the Jame, whose unfairness In decisions and Ignorance of the rules gave t'he visitors Ihe victory.

It was clear to everyone hat Stevens Point should have been tiven the game in the tenth Inning, the score was a tie with two out Vith Murphy on third, Finch at sec and Corcoran at bat. Corcoran Silt )o the short stop, who fumbled the ball intil the batter had reached first safely, Inch in the meantime starting for third Ind Murphy going home with the in ning run. Lawson of the Oshkosh team who had the ball, succeeded in touching Finch after he had pa3ed third The umpire refused to allow Murphy's run although he had scored and was sitting on the bench when Finch was put out, The decision was so unjust and ex hlbited sue'h an ignorance of the rules that Manager Slutts at first refused to continue the game, and only did so to please the crowd that had paid to Bee the game. Ooutside of the umpire's work the game was a splendid one, abounding in good plays. The visiting players are a gentlemanly lot of young fellows, put up a fast game and will make a strong play for first place In the leasue." IN ALGVMA.

liflppenlngi in Lively Town With an Indian Name. "Children's day" was observed at Al goma Grange hall on Sunday, June 20, The hall was decoraited with green wreaths, roses, peonies and wild flow ers. The followng prgrm xriaeeei exercises: Song by the school, "Oh, Children's Day." prayer by M. V. Sper-beck; song by the school, "Of Such Is the Kingdom;" recitation by Mrs.

Dla-eon's class, "That's Such a Beautiful Story;" recitation by Miss Gunning's class, "Jesus Love for Children;" recitation by Miss Convers' class, "Our Return for His Love;" song by the school, "The Children's Mission;" recitation by Hannah Larsen, "The Father's Way Is Best;" recitation by Clara Fuller, "God Made Them All;" song, "The Saints are Marching On," by Ormond Sheffer, Mrs. E. P. Scovil and Miss Inez Miller; recitation by Lizzie Falk, "What I Have;" ong, "Sleep Baby Sleep," by Mrs. John Howard and Mrs.

Margaret Whiting; recitation by Ruby Fuller, "Children of Long Ago;" song, "I Will Praise Him," by adult members of the school. Wm. Crogo and Eugene Sawyer of Chile, have been visiting at M. V. Sper.

beck's. Mrs. Van Kirk and Mrs. Wilson of Rush Lake, have been visiting at John Howard's. Mr.

Evan Owens has one to Duluth to 6pend the summer with his son. Samuel Sperbeek, who has been visiting his aunt.Mrs. Whiting, 4nd other relatives In Algoma, has returned to Duluth. Mrs. Jane King of Chicago, 111., is visiting her brother, W.

W. Lake. Mrs Stillwell, who has been visiting her parents, Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Nichols, has gone to Ohio to isit Mr.

Stillwell's parents. A license to keep a liquor saloon was granted to Tbeo. BehlalcU on Monday, Silver Jubilee Bargains in Men's Suits You can save almost half on Men's Stylish business and dress suits In this sale. Gentlemen Judge tkese Suits not by the price we name, but by their actual worth. See the fabrics, tbe make, the fit, the style and the finish, and you will acknowledge that high qualities like these bave never before been seen at suh figures as we name.

Strictly all wool Cheviot and Cassimere Suits, medium and fine Imported homospun and worsted suits. Our Jubilee sale price $4.88 Our jubilee talo price. S.88 Our jubilee sale price 6.88 Our Jubilee sale price 7.88 Our jubilee sale price 8.88 Our Jubilee Bale 8.88 Fine Tailor Made Suits Our jubilee sale (10.88 Our Jubilee sale prlco 11.88 Our Joblleo sale 12.45 Our jubilee sale 14.89 Our jubilee sale price 18.48 Our jubilee sale 17.88 Our jubilee sale price 19.48 Our jubilee sale price 31.98 Wiilte and Colored Wasii Vests Our Jubilee sale prices 75c to $2.50. The DERKSEN 'CAN A MONKEY SWIMt" Bow the Editor Decided a Bet For an Anxious Inquirer. All sorts of funny ducstions come over the telephone into a newspaper office.

Somebody is always making a bet on some queer proposition or other, and the decision is left In many cases to some of the papers. Jso sooner is tho bet made than the men who have put up money or promised to do so hie themselves to a telephone and rin up "the editor" of the paper to which the decision has been left Some of the propositions advanced are enough to make a mule laugh, and somo arc sent over thfl telephone just to worry tho man who answers tho ring and possibly to catcb. him with somo trick. The other day, for instance, some fresh boy rang up a newspaper to ask for a decision on this proposition: "Is it legal for a man to marry bis widow's sister?" The young man who answered the phone refused to "blto" and told the inquirer that his question would be answered through tho columns of the paper If he would write It out and forward It with his name and address. That is the rule in most offices.

This particular question never came, of course. But tho other night there came one that was too good to lose, so tho young man who received it answered it on bin own uc-count. "We've mado a bet," said the fellow who rang up the office, "and we want you to decido "This paper doesn't decide bets," was tho answer. "Never mind the bet then. Just decide the question, will you?" "Well, what is your question?" fit's this," came the answer.

"Can a monkey swim?" What an easy one I The young man at the phono smiled happily as he put his mouth down close 10 ine irunsiuiiMir uuu softly whispered "Just go down to the lake and jump In. Then you'll find out all about It." And then he gently rang off and went on with bis work. Chicago Times-Herald. Two Feet Two. Said the girl to the hardware clerk, "I want two feet of hose." Said the smart Aleck, "Don't you mean hose for two feet?" Hardware.

In our Career. OUR STORES. I Chicago, III. Springfield, 111. Galesburg, 111.

Once in 25 Years. 23 Silver Jubilee Bargains in 1 Hats and Caps Men's and Hoys' Straw Hats In all styles and qualities. Our jubilee sale price .15 Our Jubilee salo price .19 Our Jubileo sale .25 Our jubilee sale price .29 Our jubilee talo price Our Jubilee sale price .48 Our Jubilee sale price .69 Our Jubilee sale price .75 Our jubilee sale price 87 Our Jubilee sale price .98 Our jubilee sale prlco 1.19 Our Jubilee sale price 1.48 Our jubilee tale price 1.69 Our jubilee sale prlco 1.75 Our Jubilee sale price Men's and Bous' Fedora flats Our jubilee tale prlco $, .98 Our jubileo salo 1.29 Our Jubilee sale prlco 1.48 Our jubilee sale price 1.75 Our jubilee sale price .1.98 Our jubilee sale prlco 1 2.48 Men's nd Boys' Bicycle ana Holt Csps Our jubilee sale price .19 Our Jubilee sale price Our jubilee sale price .29 Our jubilee sale price .39 Our jubilee sale price .48 bicycle ivtrs Silver Jubilee Bargains In Our jubilee sale 4.88 Our jubilee sale price 5.88 i-ii Equal to any Imported Cigar OSHKOSH, WIS. RICH Weddina Sliver, correct In style and rich In design, that will make tbe happy brldo still happier, can be found in great variety and at extremely favorable prizes In our superb stock. All tbe latest novoltlee In tea sets and waiters, dinner services, cases of berry sets aud spoons, chests of handsome knives, forks and spoons, nut spoons, pea spoons In beautiful patterns, that will make a right royal bridal Wm.

J. Kelley. Cor. Mala Washington. Those Gas Ranges Are Lovely! Ecady to cook or bake In a moment, and not a bit ot dust or ashes, and CHEAP A complete range fot $10 and $15 And a Stove thai will cook perfectly a $2.00 And Fuel Gas at 81.25 per cu.

t. is cheaper than wood or coal. Ask all about It at the Oshkosh Gas Liohi Go. William Mainland, ftgr. ZTtTe Fo-Sale To Rent wSJA REPAIRED.

WHEELS! a. POOLE, Restate. TaL 3oS Large Consignment OF Summer Underwear. NELSON SCOTT. 126 Main Street A gun which was used by the Kearsarste In the notable engagement In which she sank the Alabama, off Cherbourg, France, in 1RW, is to be part of a soldiers' monu ment about to be erected at Stamford, Conn, i i 1 1 1 i iHiMa mHT-arat MMBauusj PEEK, MAKERS.

i. i. A Scotch collie has Jumped from a church tower in Norfolk eighty feet to the ground unharmed, save for a shaking up. It was the rector's dog. CITS ITEMS.

Fe.fr ft. E. A. Convention, Miiankee, July 6-9 the Northwestern line will sell excursion tick-'ts at exceedinly low rales, plus membership fee in the association. For dates of sale and other information ao-ply to agents Chicago Northwestern railway.

SCMMKK TOl'RS. Rivers, Mountains and Seashore, Grand Trunk Railway System. The sale of summer tourist tickets from Chicago to eastern tourist, resorls reached by the lines of the Grand Trunk railway system, embracing Niagara Falls, Muko-ka lakes, St. Lawrence river. White mountains, Portland and sea coast resorts, commences June to September 30, Inclusive.

Seaside and White Mountains Special, "the Finest Train In the World." Making weekly trips between Chicago, Portland and Old Orchard beach. First trip eastbound from Chicago June 24. The elegance and comfort of this train, combined with the ever-changing panorama of) Nature's grand and beautiful scenery through which It passes, makes it the most desirable train between Chicago and the sea shore and mountain resorts of the east. For further particulars, excursion folders, time tables, berths in sleepers, or tickets, apply to L. ft.

Morrow, C. P. and T. 103 Clark street, Chicago, 1 kilv i mm 1 immmmmm -W3Nny ill CITY ITEMS. Less Th.n Half Kates to San Francisco.

Via the Northwestern line. June 29 to Jul 3. 1S97. For full Information and reservations In through sleeping cars on June 29, apply to agents Chicago Northwestern railway. Short, Cheap and Fleaantf Koute to the East.

The Flint Pere Marquette railroad steamships leave Milwaukee every evening except Saturday, at 8:45, and the big car ferry, "Fere Marquette" (largest In the world), leaves Manitowoc every evening except Saturday, at 11. Both lines arrive at LudlnRton in time to make connections with trains for all points in Michigan.OhlO, Canada, east and south. Passengers will save money and time, As well as enjoy a pleasant trip by purchasing tickets via F. P. M.

railroad. This has been named the official route to Toronto for the annual convention of the Epworth league which will be Mi at Toronto, July to 18. Per further particulars apply to H. F. Moeller, assistant general passenger agent, Saginaw, Mica..