The Hutchinson News from Hutchinson, Kansas on October 8, 1971 · Page 6
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The Hutchinson News from Hutchinson, Kansas · Page 6

Hutchinson, Kansas
Issue Date:
Friday, October 8, 1971
Page 6
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'Children of Your Own 1 / -- 6 'Local' Diets Ensure The Smallest Waist By ERMA BOMBECK and BIL KEANE Kxcirpttd from tht beak 'JUST WAIT TILL YOU HAVE CHILDREN OF YOUR OWNl' Copyright (c) 1*71 by Erma Bomback and »H Ke»n». PuWiihtd by DwMaday I Company, inc. Prom Fat is not a disease for all seasons. It manifests itself in teen age girls two weeks before the prom. Not three, not one, but two weeks. It is only then that the female species drops her elastic jeans, shinnies out of her bulky sweater, stands in front of the mirror and cries, "What happened?' 1 Her concern turns to hysteria in the fitting room as she • : shops for her prom gown. "It's no use," said my daughter, slumping to the floor. "I've looked everywhere and I can 't : find it." "Find what?" I asked. "My waist. It's gone. It was there last fall when I marched with the drill team. I remember. I tucked my blouse in . at that spot and my skirt had a waistband on it." Prom Fat "It's here somewhere," I said, turning her around slowly. "We just have to find it. Try sucking in." "I am sucking in," she said. "This is ridiculous. All we do is look for the narrowest part of your body." "That's my bust." "Oh. Well, then, bend over and I'll mark the crease." "It's no use," she said, pulling on the jeans. "I have a clear-cut case of Prom Fat. Let's buy the size 7 and I'll diet down to it." In the two weeks that ensued she was to try the following "local" diets. CINDY'S MIRACLE DIET A soft pretzel every three hours (mustard optional) No water. Repeat. No water. ("What happens when you drink water?'' I asked. "You float around the world in 80 days.") LUCILLE'S EAT-LIKE-A FLY DIET Sugared doughnuts (all you can eat) Jelly buns (all you can eat) Cakes and cookies Any leftovers you can pick up. ("Flies exist on this," said Lucille, "and you never saw a fat fly, did you?") ELSIE'S EAT-AT-SCHOOL PLAN Eat in the school cafeteria for five days. This not only eliminates your consumption of lunch at noon, it destroys the taste buds for the other two meals. IRENE'S DESPERATION DIET PACKET 1 breath mint every three hours "No dinner for me. I'm on a DIET!" An 8x10 glossy of Mama Cass pasted on the refrigerator door. BARBARA'S BANANA DIET 8 bananas a day 8 glasses of water (A spare tire hanging from a tree in the back yard to swing from.) It was two days before the prom. True to her promise to herself, my daughter had shed eight pounds. She looked like Vincent Price, but she had indeed conquered Prom Fat. On the night of the dance, she ate only her eight bananas and drank eight glasses of water. It worked. The ball gown slide over her hips with ease. The waist had returned. The jeweled belt encircled it like slim fingers. The next morning I went to her room for the details. "How did it go?" I asked excitedly. "It was the most wonderful prom I have ever seen," she said. "There were little jars of soaps and perfumes around the table. There was an attendant who gave you a towel when you washed your hands and when the door opened the music was fabulous." "What do you mean when the door opened?'' I asked cautiously. "You sound like you're describing a rest room." "I am," she said. "I was there most of the evening. What with the water and all. Besides, I felt faint." "You mean you spent your entire senior prom in . .the John?" "Would it make you feel better," she said, "if I told you I had the smallest waist in the room?" (End of Series) Around the Town Hutchinson News Friday, Oct. 8, 1971 Page « Hobo Party for Postal Auxiliary Mrs. K. P. Emery was hostess Thursday evening at her home at 718 East 23rd, for a hobo party for members of the Salt City Auxiliary No. 352 of the postal letter carriers. Co- hostesses were Mmes. Thomas Hamilton and Arthur Hall. As the 25 members arrived in hobo costume, each was presented a knapsack and they went for a hike. They returned to the Emery home for a wiener roast. Mrs. Lowell Cline, president, presided for the business meeting. Mrs. Cline received the prize for the best costume. MRS. RICHARD Borton gave the second lesson on ceramics to members of Preceptor Omega chapter of Beta Sigma Phi, at a meeting Thursday in the Borton home at 117 West 30th. Mrs. Richard Jacobs is the delegate to the state convention Oct. 8 to 10 in Salina. A box supper in November was planned. MEMBERS of the VFW Auxiliary met Thursday in the VFW Hall. Hostesses were Mmes. Paul Aupperle and Obie Trott. Honored at the meeting were the gold star mothers, Mmes. Pauline Stelter, Haven; Ed Os- [enbaugh, Matilda Waller, Ruby Roberts, Pearl Roberts and Mamie Glaze. Becky Bauer is a new member. MRS. MIKE Lacey was hostess in her home at 1806 James Thursday for a meeting of Xi Beta Sigma chapter of Beta Sigma Phi, with Mrs. Wes Nickel assisting. Mrs. Merle Wilson gave the program on "How To Be a Real Person." The sunshine box was received by Mrs. Dwight Gwaltney. As a service project, the chapter has adopted a family for a year. Plans were discussed for a Christmas bazaar Saturday, Nov. 20. SALT CITY Chapter of the American Business Women's Association met at dinner in the Kansas Room of the Hilton Inn. Guests were Mmes. Kenneth Fletchall and Melvin Luna. A Halloween theme was followed in the table decorations. Dr. Jack Wortman showed a film and demonstrated emergency life saving measures. The vocational talk was given by Delma Jean Pearson, clinical instructor at South Hospital, Mrs. Rachel Piros, chairman of the ways and means committee, outlined plans for the coming year. New members of the chapter are Mandy N i s 1 e y, Mmes. Henry Bechtold, Marilyn Milier, Floyd Thompson and Frank Chastain. XI ALPHA Omega chapter of Beta Sigma Phi met Thursday morning in the home of Mrs. Don Darling, 3119 North Walnut. The program was given by Mmes. A. D. Wickendoll and Darling on "How To Be a Real Person, and What We Want." Plans were discussed for the BSP Zodiac ball Friday, Oct. 22 in the Moose Lodge. THETA BETA chapter of Beta Sigma Phi met Thursday evening in the home of Mrs. Jim Lahar, RFD 3. Co-hostess was Mrs. Bud Baysinger. "Your Poise and Charm" was the program presented by Mmes. Charles Craig and Kent Davison. Plans were made to assist at the mental health convention next week at the Hilton Inn. MEMBERS of Theta Beta chapter of Beta Sigma Phi were guests for a fondue party in the home of Mrs. Bob Harner, 116 West 24th. She was assisted by others on the membership committee. Guests of the chapter were Mmes. Tom Ryan and Matt Unger. Prizes at party bridge were received by Mmes. Jack Manning and Randy Bruegger. BETA THETA chapter of Beta Sigma Phi members met for a model meeting in the home of Mrs. Karl Knauer, 501 Rustic Road. Mrs. Cecil Vonachen was the assisting hostess. A demonstration of wigs and hairpieces was given by Donna Bryant and Mrs. Edward Curiel. Mrs. Robert Cabeen is a new member. Guests were Mrs. Frank Sloyer and Shirley Dixon, a member of Omega chapter. MR. AND MRS. Simon Wiens of Inman will be honored with a service of praise at 6 p.m. Saturday followed by refreshments in the Bethel Mennonite Church south of Inman, in observance of their silver wedding anniversary. Mr. and Mrs. Wiens have two children, SueZan and Sidney, of the home. THE LA Leche League met Thursday evening in the home of Mrs. Floyd Barkman, 125 East 13th. The topic of discussion was "Art of Breast Feeding." Thirteen members were in attendance. Tomorrow's Events Club Activities SALT CITY Chins Painters: Eddle'i Sunset Restaurant, 10 a.m. UVEDALE Chaper, Daughter* of the American Revolution: President'! Dining Room. Sterling College, luncheon, 1 p.m. United In Marriage Curiosity Among the Young Is Normal DEAR ANN LANDERS: Your answer to the mother who Was horrified when she caught her young daughter and her cousin "playing doctor" was good. But it wasn't strong enough. Please re-emphasize that curiosity among the young is normal. ed, etc. For months, I had nightmares that I had died in my sleep because I wasn 't fit to live. For years I felt guilty and feared every normal urge. The very thought of kissing a boy made me sick. I longed for male attention but I was terrified that I might do something sinful if I were alone with a boy. My erotic daydreams were always about violent and forbidden sex. It took years of professional help and thousands of dollars to get myself straightened around. Please, Ann, print this letter and urge parents to understand that the sex drive is normal and natural and that young children who are made to feel guilty about normal instincts can be scarred for life. —Lucky I Made It HELLO, LUCKY. Here's your letter. Thanks for pro- ; viding the re-emphasis. CONFIDENTIAL To Sweets To The Sweets And Nuts To You: Sorry, I can't possibly publish every letter in the paper. I do select all the letters myself, However, and I take full responsibility for every column. The views expressed in this space are my own—and not those of the edi tor, the publisher, or the publisher's wife. James Madden Sharon Hawkins St. Bernard's Catholic Church, Ellsworth was the setting for [the marriage of Sharon Hawkins to James Madden. Their parents are Mr. and Mrs. Herbert Hawkins, Gene- Iseo, and Mrs. Alice Madden, Bunker Hill. The ceremony was officiated by Revs. Roy Brotton, Russell, and James F. Hoover. Musicians were Mrs. Louis Splitter, Geneseo, and Herbert Hawkins Jr., Holly, Colo., brother of the bride. Sister of Bride Honor attendants were Mrs. David Borgen, Holly, sister of the bride; and Dennis Rumley, |St. Louis, Mo. Other attendants were Kyle Splitter, Geneseo, and Joe P. Theilen, Dorrance. Ushering were Larry Green, Russell, and Mr. Borgen, Holly. Flowergirl and ringbearer were Janell Scritchfield, Topeka, and Brian Borgen, Holly. Rice bags were distributed by ( Steven Borgen, Holly. The reception was in the parish hall. Mr. and Mrs. Madden will be at home in Bunker Hill. The bridegroom is employed by the Russell County Highway Department. George Brethawr Rita Wierman Wedding vows were exchanged in St. Mary's Catholic Church, McCracken, by Rita Wierman and George Brethowr. Parents of the couple are Mr. and Mrs. Francis Wierman, McCracken, and Mrs. Irene Mengel, Hartley, Iowa. Officiating at the ceremony was Rev. Russell Simms. Providing music were John Stewart, Topeka, and Mrs. Arlene Rues. Altar boys were Pat Linenberger, Dodge City, and William Greenway. Honor Attendants Maid of honor and best man were Marilyn Wierman, sister of the bride, and Roger Earls, Topeka. Other attendants were Judy Wierman, Brownell; Karla Richolson, Ness City; Dennis Gessner, Topeka; and Ray Wierman, brother of the bride. Ushers were William Marshal, Mrs. James Madden (Sharon Hawkins) Paul Holzein, Topeka; J. Dean and Neal Ochs, WaKeeney. The reception was in the McCracken Grade School and a dance was given in the Ness City American Legion building Following a wedding trip, the couple will be at home in Tope ka, where Mr. Brethowr is serving with the U.S. Air Force stationed at Forbes AFB. Mrs. Brethowr attended Fort Hays Kansas State College Mr. and Mrs. George Brethowr (Rita Wierman) Hays, and is employed in Topeka by the American Yearbook Co. love IS, . . . letting him choose his tie himself. STJEAMATIC carpet .cleaning "Call Doug lor a Clean Rug" Phone M3-2S38 Something similar happened j to me when I was not quite 12. I was very naive and thought I it would be fun to "play doc-j tor" with a boy who was 13. My parents discovered us and gave me such hell you can't imagine what it did to me. We were devout Catholics and they drummed it into my head that I was a vile creature — that | God hated me, that I was doom- Saturday is a good day to shop at LOAFERS WITH A NEW LOOK! Here are just two ... come see our collection I New leathers ... Buggywhip, waxhide, harness I Grained leathers, antiqued leathers, crinkly patents 1 Fashion colors I Regularly $12 NOW JUST $9.90 Saturday Fabric Specials Save on Fall Fabrics at Beardslee's 300 Yards of Lovely special New Fall Woolens $999 Plaids Values to $5.98 * - 600 Yards 100% Wool Georgia Flannels ^0^ 83.49 600 Yards 54 inch Bonded Acrylics 2KET Values to $4.98 Dacron/Cotton . . 100% Cotton Special also Acrylic Knits $^69 Novelties & Solids Values to $3.98 80% Acetate 20% Nylon Bonded Moss Crepes Pastel and Dark Colors. Reg. $2.98 1,000 Yards of Lovely New Fall Fabrics Polyester Blends • Acetates & Cottons in Fall Prints - Checks • Stripes etc. Values to $1.98 Sat. Special 99 c - 1 w

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