THU OTTAWA HERALD Tuesday, January 15, 1963 Ann Landers Shouldn't Prolong Mourning Period Dear Ann Landers: I'm a girl 15 who is writing this letter in behalf of myself and my 17-year- old brother, Our father died three months ago. He was a fine man and we loved and respected him. For two months after his death we e( j out to didn't go anyplace except to jj gr school, to church, and to the cemetery with Mom. We didn't turn on the radio or the hi-fi or the TV. Now, both my brother and I want to date, and get active- in school affairs again. Mom says we I are blaspheming our father's Ann memory by even thinking of ing in common. After seven months of no communication we were divorced. The following year I married a man who seemed devoted and kind. He told me his wife had died of cancer and he was raising their two little girls. He turn- a sadist and a i earned his wife had corn- he ^ the amusing ourselves. She turns off the music when she comes into our rooms and lectures us about respect for the deceased. According to her, mourning should last one full year. She wears black from head to foot and says she plans to do so indefinitely. Are we wrong to feel as we do? Please print this letter and your advice. Talking to Mother does nc good.-RESPECTUFL BUT LIVING Dear Respectful: Prolonged mourning is unhealthy and it serves no useful purpose. Teenagers should not be expected to exclude themselves from school activities and isolate themselves from life when a parent dies. The meaningful way to honor your father's memory is by being the kind of children you know your Dad would want you to be. Ask your clergyman to speak to your mother. She's not thinking clearly these days. Dear Ann Landers: In a recent column you told a woman she was sappy as a maple tree in April. Up here in Wisconsin the maple trees get sappy in February. I thought you might like to know. Thank you. - COLEMAN, WIS. READER Dear Reader: I appreciate the information, but February doesn't rhyme with maple. I know — neither does April, but it's a lot closer. Dear Ann Landers: Is it possible for a mowan who has had two marriage failures to make a go of it with a man who has never been married? At. age 17 I jumped into one of those war marriages — im petuous, crazy, — everybody was doing it. When he came home three years later we had noth- youngest girl with an appliance cord and knocked me across the room I filed for divorce. I asked for, and got the girls. Now I've met a real man. He id my age (40), and is the grandest person I've ever known. He loves the girls and wants to marry me. Everyone thinks it would be wonderful, I know it would be — for me. But what about HIM? Please advise. - BLUE JAY Dear Blue Jay: You have a good understanding of why your two previous marriages failed. The fact that you seem preoccupied with the happiness of your friend rather than your own happiness is also an encouraging signal. And, too, none of the elements which contributed o the failures seem present in his relationship. If the man wants to marry you, with full knowledge of your last, I say go ahead, Girl, and *ood luck. Dear Ann Landers: I was saddened by the letter from the little girl whose mother threw "Powder Puff," the dead cat, in the trash can and would not let the children have a funeral. My children had a sweet and wonderful funeral for their cocker spaniel. The children lowered their hands and sang, "Where, Oh Where, Has My Uttle Dog Gone." It was very touching. I thought you might like to know how another mother handles the situation. Thank you.—N.Y.C. Dear N.Y.C.: Thanks for a heart-warming letter. I'm sure it meant a great deal to the children and you were wise to give them your support Confidential to No Cooperation: Welcome to The Club. You and millions of other women are attempting to be both father and mother because your husbands are too busy trying to be the richest men in the cemetery. Pull Hints From Heloise Can Neutralize Ammonia Odor By HELOISE CRUSE Dear Heloise: The ammonia odor in used diapers which annoys some of your mothers and "coffee friends" is universal. The odor can be prevented in the home by keeping'used diapers submerged in a diaper pail containing water to which some vinegar has been added. (The existing highly alkaline ammonia is neutralized by the acid vinegar. Additional bacterial growth is inhibited by the acid medium.) Aaroducst rripoy os He rla rpp Also, several proprietary products for adding to diaper - pail water are carried by grocery stores. Ammonia formed in diapers is chemically identical to the household ammonia sold in stores for cleaning purposes. Ammonia is a powerful skin irritant and is Helow» charged by the medical profession for being the single greatest cause of diaper rash. When mothers across the nation , jjtf\L / * smell ammonia at diaper changes, ammonia has been in contact with babies' skins, and they are literally inviting one kind of diaper A LEI TO YOU — Elizabeth Hinton, Ottawa University sophomore, who lived in Hawaii 13 years, illustrates a well-known Hawaiian dance pose, "A Lei to you," for a recent meeting of Farmount HDU. (Herald Photo by Lois Smith) Hawaiian Program Fairmount HDU By up your sox and do these things alone. Does almost everyone have a good time but you? If so, sned for Ann Landers' booklet, "How To Be Well-Liked," enclosing with your request 20 cents in coin and a long, self-addressed, stamped envelope. Fairmount HDU obtained Elizabeth Hinton, Ottawa University sophomore, as speaker at a recent meeting planned to acquaint members and their families with the 50th state, Hawaii. Miss Hinton lived in Hawaii for 13 years. She gave one dance, the Hula, and told of the eight islands which make up the state. She described them, giving physical make-up, industries, crops, new buildings, hotels, climate, people and volcanoes. The speaker gave her impres- sions of Kansas and told that the Mid-West has become a fovorite locality for her. She wore a costume of black sheath enhanced with floral design. A basket supper preceded the meeting in Green Dell school. Mrs. Russell Wray is unit chairman. one rash known clinically as "ammonia dermatitis." It is important to promptly change wet diapers to avoid a rash caused by the skin becoming "water - logged," and to promptly change soiled diapers to avoid irritation of the skin. R. H. Williams Diaper Service Information Bureau Mothers: A diaper service information bureau would tell us to use vinegar! Bless their sweet time! This shows that our laundry method— which uses vinegar — has proven true. Heloise Dear Heloise: Did you know that an inexpensive percolator coffee pot makes the perfect toy for a two-year- old? It's a put-together, holds water sand, and so forth, and is also a "play grown-up" toy, too. Also when I want to remove finger marks from woodwork in a wink, I just lather up a cloth with plain, cheap face soap. It's what I call magic soap. Ann McClung. Dear Heloise: Many years ago one of the world's greatest tailors gave this advice for care of woolen clothing: Iron it as little and as seldom as possible. Hang on shaped hangers, or pad the hangers to conform to the shape of the shoulders. In moist climates, hang the clothing overnight on the screened porch or where fresh art circulates. In dry climates, hang either in the laundry or the bathroom where there is steam in the air. Touch up (with a steam iron) any parts that need special pressing. However. . . when press- ng a wollen garment never iron uite dry; always leave the wool lightly damp and hang at once. G.M.B. And. . . thank you so much. Hint was great. Heloise )ear Heloise: I was once taught how to make he perfect white sauce. Thoroughly cook flour and butter — with salt and pepper added; then set aside to cool. Vhen cool (or merely warm) stir the milk. When completely blended, place over burner, stirring almost constantly. This does not take long for, with constant stirring, the heat can be fairly high. As soon as it bubbles" it is done. The sauce may be kept hot in i double boiler until you are ready for it. The thorough cooking of the flour in the butter (or margarine) adds greatly to the taste. ENGAGED - Mr. Glen Carpenter, RFD 2, announces the engagement of his daughter, Dora, to John Winters, son of Mr. and Mrs. Howard Winters, Princeton. Miss Carpenter is a graduate of Wellsville High School with the class of 1962 and is employed at Hallmarks, Inc., Lawrence. Mr. Winters is a 1961 graduate of Princeton High School and is in the Air Force, stationed at Bergstrom AFB, Austin, Tex. Bethel No. 31 Has Supper Sixty persons attended the Job'i Daughters potluck supper last eve* ling. Following the meal flier* was choir practice and drill team practice. Ann Machin, honored queen, presided. It was announced that he bethel is inviting the Osawa- omie Bethel to attend the next meeting which has been changed o Jan. 30. For the librarian's report Teresa Moore gave a report on th« ounder of the order. Eleven council members and 50 members at- ended. makings of rarebit—with nothing to do but toast some bread! C.M.B. Dear Heloise: Sandwiches made with mayon naise do not keep well under freezing. Mustard or ketchup can be used. When making a batch of sand wiches for the lunch box cut them in two before wrapping and mix two different kinds in one sand wich basket — for example, ha! a cheese sandwich and half a meat sandwich. The variety is enjoyed. Catherine. I often make three times the quantity of white sauce I am going to use, put one-third of it in a double boiler for use in the next meal; put one-third of it in a container to be put in my freezer, and eave one-third in the original pan until I have added and allowed to melt, generous portions of cut-up cheese. This 'cheese sauce is always available in my refrigerator. . . makes for easy preparation of noodles, or spaghetti. By adding a bit of Worchester- shire sauce, a few drops of tobas- co and more pepper I have the The Baby Has Been Named The son born today at Stor mont-Vail Hospital, Topeka, t Mr and Mrs. James Pollom, 31 S. Hickory, has been named Rus sell Everett. He weighed 8 Ib 15 oz. Club Hears About Artist For MPM Club program yesterday Mrs. W. R. Gamble gave a paper, "The Life and Work of Norman Rockwell, Modern Day Illustrator." Mrs. W. B. Smith was hostess for the meeting in Frist Methodist Church. Mrs. Clarence Nauman opened the meeting with a New Year's poem. Appointed to a program committee for the coming year were Mrs. H. J. Nordeen, Mrs. Gamble, Mrs. T. B. Powers, Mrs. R. D. Spears and Mrs. Kathryn Me- Clure Club Forecast Wednesday RICHMOND Scissor Club, Mrs. Harriet Johnson WESTMINSTER CIRCLES, Dorcal, Mrs. Max Ward; Martha, Mrs. W. B. Smith; Lydla, Mrs. John Finder WOMEN'S Fellowship, Missionary Meeting, Church of the Brethren FIRST BAPTIST WMS Circles, Esther Oreenmun, Mrs. Wilmer Reynolds: Eileen James, Mrs. C. W. Hegberg; Eleanor Stlmson, Mrs. R. N. Bundy FIRST METHODIST WSCS Circles, Deborah, Mrs. Lloyd Carr; Dorcai. church library; Esther, Mrs. E. O. Stith; Martha, Mrs. H. V. Worthlngton; Rebekah, Mrs. Guy Briscoe; Ruth, small dining room, at church CWF Circles, Ruth, Mrs. Don Waymire; Lydia, Mrs. O. E. Dawktns EARNEST WORKERS EASTERN STAR OARFIELD GARDNERS, Mrt. Earl Schmanke WANTAM Application for Blue Cross-Blue Shield's SENIOR CITIZENS PLAN CLOSES JANUARY 22 KANSANS AGE 60 AND OVER If you are age 60 or over, and are not a member of Blue Cross - Blue Shield, you have until January 22 to apply for the new SENIOR CITIZENS plan .. . regardless of your health condition. Use this coupon to get benefits folder and application form. Act now. Remember, applications close January 22. BLUE CROSS - BLUE SHIELD OF KANSAS —_— ' 1133 Topeka Boulevard BLUE CROSS-BLUE SHIELD Topeka, Kansas Kansas Hospital Serv. Assn., Inc. Kansas Physicians' Serv. | p| MJe , en( j me comp | e te information On your | new Plans for those over age 60. I I I | CITY. I NAME. ADDRESS. S FURNITURE 226-28 So. Mam RICHARDSON'S... SHOE CLEARANCE Here is Your Once-a-Year Opportunity to Save on Fine Pieces, Beautifully Designed and Made, for Every Room in the House FURNITURE « WOMEN'S •• • AIR STEPS • LIFE STRIDES Lizards Included VALUES TO $15.95 « FITTED FROM STOCK SAVE as MUCH as 50% WOMEN'S -• TEEN'S • LIFE STRIDES • VINERS • GLAMOUR DEBS VALUES TO $14.95 .. ALL ON RACKS - Drastic Reductions in Every Department Shop Early for Best Selection GROWING GIRLS' AND WOMEN'S DRESS FLATS SPORT OXFORDS VALUES TO $8.95 .. ALL ON TABLES « MEN AND BOYS' Here's your Chance to Put Quality at Your Feet. . . Men's and Boys' DRESS SHOES FLORSHEIMS -• REGALS -- PEDWINS 20? 0 OFF Buy Now And Save on Wanted Items lor the Home Many Items are One-of-a-Kind Easy Terms on + Any Purchase. + Take Months to Pay 1 All are offered at Worth While Savings during this Sale. CHILDREN'S BUSTER BROWN SHOES VALUES TO $8.95 e SHORT LOTS, BUT PLENTY OF SIZES... 4 WOMEN'S HANDBAGS » $1.98 Colby's RICHARDSON'S SHOE STORE 212 S. 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