The Corpus Christi Caller-Times from Corpus Christi, Texas on August 13, 1971 · Page 50
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The Corpus Christi Caller-Times from Corpus Christi, Texas · Page 50

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Corpus Christi, Texas
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Friday, August 13, 1971
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Page 50
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Lover Using That Good Old Baylor Line? © Los AngHu Times My .pal, Dick Whittinghill, the demon disc jockey, has a new game he plays on the morning shows. It's a spoof on How - Great - Songs - Came To - Be - Written and it goes something like this: First Guy: "Go away, Joe, I'm trying -to write a great American love song." Second Guy: "Why don't you ept married?" First Guy: "Why?" · · . Second Guy: "You're nobody till somebody loves you." First Guy: "So?" Second Guy: "So, find yourself somebody to love." . t . First Guy: "Ah, there aren't 'enough real great broads to go around--hey! THAT sounds like a song plug! Get it! 'There aren't enough real great broads to go around!" Hit it on the piano! It'll be a smash!" And the two of them go into a buck and wing. In the same spirit, we.now take you to the apartment where Jack Norworth and Albert Von Tilzer are struggling to compose an anthem for baseball when a kid comes in: Norworth: "Beat it, kid, we're trying to drum up a song for the Grand Old Game, we're busy." Kid: "Take me out to the ball game." Norworth: "Are you kidding? There'll be 40,000 there. You'll get stepped on." Kid: "Take me out with the crowd." Norworth: "Now, look, you haven't even had dinner." Kid: "Buy me some peanuts and Crackerjacks." Norworth: "You'll get home too late to do your home-, work." Kid: "I don't care if I never get back." Norworth: "Look, kid, Ty Cobb isn't even in town this week. It's those lousy St. Louis Browns." Kid: "Let me root, root,' root for the home team." Norworth: "You don't know a strikeout from a base-on- balls." Kid: "For it's one-two-three strikes you're o u t . . . " Norworth: "Kid, here's a quarter, see if you can find a hole in the fence and watch the Pirates till night -- hey, Al, that sounds like a song cue! 'If I Could Find A Hole In The Fence, I'd Watch The Pirates Tonight!' Get me Nora Bayes! I'll put it in the Follies!" We now dissolve to Oyster Bay where ^Cole Porter is wrestling with a pencil and. paper and frowning. In a bassinet beside him, a baby coos. Porter: "Governess! Will you please do something about this baby? I'm trying to write a cheer for Yaue and all that baby does is lay there drooling and saying 'Boola Boola Boola Boola!" Now, please take and lock it up some place -- hey! There it is! I've got it! 'Oh, Yale, You're A Lock! We Love You Chock- A-Block.' Get, me the Yale News!" Maine-iocs Here To Boast Then, there is the Harvard undergrad who is preoccupied- ly walking along with his girl friend at Coney Island, making notes periodically, then suddenly she rushes up holding a stuffed tiger she just won. by knocking down three milk bottles with a baseball. Girl: "Hold that tiger while I powder my nose." Student (exploding): "Can't you see I'm trying to think! I have two days to come up with a cheer for the Princeton game and all you can say to me is 'Hold that tiger! Hold that tiger!' Don't you dames ever get serious? Why. that tiger's just a rag." Lindley Bothwell is standing on a field frowning as he sees his Stanley Steamer limping to a stop at the other end of the field, and a girt steps out. Lindley: "What's going on? Here I am, trying to set up the cheering section and you come along and spoil my concentration." Girl: "Well, the tire just went flat." · Lindley: "Oh, how'd that happen?" Top Seeds Win In Girls Tennis PHILADELPHIA W) -- The first four seeded p l a y e r s played up to form Thursday and reached the semifinal round of the U.S. Girls Grass Court Tennis Championship at the Philadelphia Cricket club. They were Chris Evert of Ft. Lauderdale, Fla.; Janet Newberry of La Jolla, Calif.; Marcelyn Louie of San Francisco and Eliza Pande of Palo Alto, Calif. Miss Evert and Miss New- b'erry came from behind to win their matches after losing their first sets. Miss Evert, a member of the U.S. Women's Wightman Cup team outhit Marita Redondo of National City, Calif. 5-7, 64, 7-5. Miss Newberry scored by 2-6, 6-4, 7-5 over Laurie Fleming of Ft. Lauderdale, Fla. Girl: "Oh, it just sort of went 'Siss Boom Aah!' " And a locomotive went by." Lindley: "Rats! Here I am up to my eares with the game only 24 hours away and now I got to fix a flat that goes 'Siss Boom Aah!' and with" a locomotive yet? Not only that but the card section can't hold the cards still. Why; it looks like that animal's moving in the beaver picture. NOTHING'S working right. I should .quit." We find Rudy Vallee listening with a frown as the Vagabond Lover is toying with his megaphone in a recording studio in the '20s. He is addressing a bespectacled young man in a raccoon coat and frosh beanie. Rudy; "I'm going out of my mind -- four days trying to think up a rouser for the University of Maine." Frosh: "Take a break. Lift a stein to dear old Maine." Rudy: "I can't. The neigh-. bors will hear." Frosh: "Shout till the rafters ring." Rudy: "Will you be serious?" Frosh: "Stand and drink a toast once again." Rudy: "Hey! Maybe (hat's .it! 'Butter the toast, put on the roast, the Maine-iacs are here to boast!' That's it! That'll get streets named after me! Oh, thank you, kid. My time is your time!" Finally, there is the hero who is commissioned to do the alma mater fo Cornell. He disappears in the hills for several days and then comes down with the song. Hero (to college president): "Here it is. Your alma mater." Prexy: "Great! How does it go?" Hero: "It goes, 'Cornell, you're swell. You fight like hell. You ring that bell. Cornell, Cornell, yell, yell, yell- well, well, well!" Prexy: "That's p e r f e c t ! However did you think of it?" Hero: "Easy. I just went high above Cayuga's waters and it just came to me." - - - t - N f * -~ \ '- £ V I f ^ * *·*,*· X*t ty* 1 * jf- ' - ·». . ... ·-*%£ Aggies No. 1, Hogs 7th DALLAS m -- It you use experience as formula, the Texas Aggies should win the Southwest Conference football championship handily this fall with Arkansas a near cellar- dweller. That's the way it is in the second annual Southwest Conference experience-formula championship. The formula gives one point for each returning letterman, an additional point if he's a senior, and a third point if he's a returning starter. Then a point is subtracted for each letterman lost and an additional point is subtracted for each starter lost. SMU's Gary Hammond is worth three points to the Mustangs, for example, being a letterman, a senior and a returning starter. The Mustangs lose two points via the graduation of Ken Fleming, a letterman and a starter in 1970. The Aggies total 75 points, almost doubling the total of runner-up Texas Tech. AM returns 45 lettermen, 21 returnees who started at least part of the time in 1970, and 23 seniors--a total of 89 points. Deficits include losing ten lettermen, four starters -- a total of 14 points. Here's the experience-formula rating for 1971: 1, Texas AM, 75 points; 2, Texas Tech, 39 points; 3, TCU, 31 points; 4, Texas, 24 points; 5, Rice, 23 points; 6, Baylor, 20 points; 7, Arkansas, 16 points; 8, SMU, 12 points. Rice was the experience champion last year with 53 points, while TCU figured minus four points. Champion Texas ranked third in the experience battle with 36 points, runner-up Arkansas was fifth with 31 points and third-place Tech ranked second in points with 38. Reserch over the last six seasons shows the conference champions for those years averaged 32.5 points in experience. They ranged from a high of 50 points (co-champion Texas in 1968) to a low of nine points (AM, '67). Angel Takes Wings California Angels first baseman Jim Spencer took a flying leap for a high throw as the Yankees' Horace Clarke dove back into the base on a pick- off attempt by pitcher Tom Murphy in the,fifth inning of the nightcap of a doubieheader yesterday. See story Page 2F. (AP Wirephoto) FRIDAY, AUGUST 13, 1971 SECTION F HELP FROM SUPERSTITIONS Door-Die Combat for Douglas BALTIMORE W -- Rookie quarterback Karl Douglas of the Baltimore Colts plans to combat a do-or-die situation Saturday with a set of proven superstitions. "They worked in college, maybe they'll work here, too," Douglas said of his list of hex breakers which include: --Washing the laces of his football shoes. --Cleaning and polishing his shoes. --Making certain his wife Jacqueline is in the Memorial Stadium crowd 'for the night game against the Chicago Bears. Last year, Texas AI lost only one game on the way to the NAIA championship--the one Mrs. Douglas missed because her mother was hospitalized for critical surgery. After that, Douglas said, "I was determined that my wife wouldn't miss any more. She didn't, and we won all the rest. "The NAIA finals were in Greenville, S.C., against Wofford, a long way from Texas. But I decided we'd just have to go into debt to fly her out there. She was right there be- side me when the plane took off." Texas AI trounced Wofford, 48-7. Last week, as the Colts lost 10-7 to Kansas City, Douglas played most of the third quarter. He threw four incomplete passes and another* toss was intercepted. "I don't knosy how other people are looking at it," Douglas said of his starter's role Saturday, "but to me it's a do-or-die proposition." "The coaches have promised to play me the first half," Dummitt Makes Bid By The Associated Pre« Quarterback Dennis Dummit was passed over by all the National Football League teams during the draft, but he'll guide the Los Angeles Rams against the Cleveland Browns Friday under the watchful eye of his former college coach. Tommy Prothro, Dummit's coach at UCLA and now field boss of the Rams 3 probably will let the -foot, 180-pound rookie call the signals in the second half, but is quick to add that Roman Gabriel remains the club's No: 1 quarterback. "I'll use Gabriel more than in the previous two games, but Dummit will work at least a half," Prothro said. Dummit sparkplugged the UCLA offense his last two. years and Prothro was influential in the Rams signing the quarterback as a free agent. Cleveland Coach Nick Skorick plans to us.e sophomore Mike Phipps at quarterback. Phipps spearheaded three long scoring drives last Sunday as the Browns bowed to San Francisco 38-24. Meanwhile, Fran Tarkcnton, star quarterback of the New York Giants, r e a c h e d an agreement with the team. The scrambling signal c a 11 e r 's signing of a one-year pact ended the four-day-old dispute that started when lie walked out on the Giants in Houston. T a r k e n t o n said he was "very happy with the signing. I'm sorry for what what I did on Sunday. I admit it was a hasty move," In Friday's other exhibition clash, 'the Miami Dolphins host the San Francisco 49ers in a nationally televised game. Still smarting from last week's 27-10 setback by Cincinnati Dolphins Coach Don Shula plans to spice Miami's ground attack with Jim Klick and Larry Csonka. The two running backs reported late to training camp because of a contract dispute and saw only one quarter of action each against the Ben- gals. The lethargic Miami rushing attack netted only 24 yards in the game. Nine exhibition games are slated for Saturday--Chicago at Baltimore, Cincinnati at Detroit, Houston at St. Louis, Atlanta at Kansas City, Pittsburgh at Green Bay, New Ore- leans at Dallas, Washington at Denver, New York Jets at Oakland and Minnesota at San Diego. Sunday's preseason game pits the New York Giants against the New England Patriots. The slate of 13 weekend games ends Monday with Buffalo at Philadelphia. Determined not to have a repeat of last. Saturday's fiasco when rookie center Danny Ryczek high-snapped the ball over punter Mike Bragg's head against San Diego, Washington Redskins Coach George Allen p e r s u a d e d George Burman to come out of retirement. "Never as a coach, in college or the pros, have I had a rookie center," said Allen. "I just hate to lose." Burman centered for the Los Angeles Rams and also saw duty as an offensive guard and tackle. Norm Snead, who has called signals for losers during most SMU Nearly Had Royal DARRELL ROYAL . . at the right place LUBBOCK (AP) -- Texas Coach Darrell Royal has disclosed in Longhorn Football 71 Magazine that he would have gone to Southern Methodist as head football coach in 1956 if Athletic Director Matty Bell had followed up an earlier telephone call to clinch the deal. Royal was head coach at Washington at the time and later that year was hired by Dana X. Bible of Texas. Royal told sports writ or .Biirle Pettit: "I was interested . . . very interested in going to SMU and I told Matty so. I sure wanted that job--the appeal of coming back to the Southwest, of coming to Texas." ' Bell telephoned Royal in December of 1958 but never fol- lowed up the contact and later hired Bill Meeks. Royal was asked if he has ever .wondered what would have happened if he had gone to SMU and he answered: "Sure, I thought about what the difference could have been right now if I had gone to SMU. And had Dan-ell Royal stayed at Mississippi State what a difference it would have been. Or for that matter, if I was still up in Canada. Yes, you have lo be be in the right place. "I never have been under any false illusions. When we finished up that 30-gamfi winning streak I didn't bust too many chest buttons. Royal has won two national championships since he has been at Texas and numerous SWC titles as the Longhorns start their 15th season, "I take pride in all this, sure," Royal said. "And I feel that we have done a good job. I'm not trying to eat humble pie and I'm not trying to be falsely modest. I'm proud of what we achieved. Yet, at the same time, I know that there are a lot of other capable men and capable coatehes strung out all over the country that just haven't been in the right situation to get the job done. "I have never lacked for confidence. I'm not trying to give that picture at all. I don't think I'm the greatest coach that ever came down the pike, and I sure as hell don't think I'm the worst." The Longhorn '71 Magazine is published in Lubbock and made its debut on the newsstands Thursday. of his 10 NFL years, will start with the winning Vikings against San Diego. Minnesota has compiled 12-2 records for each of the past two seasons. The Giants and Rams traded offensive tackles, with Rich Buzin going to Los Angeles and Joe Taffoni assigned to New York. FOOTBALL Tie-Break Test Set In Kansas TOPEKA, Kan. (ffl -- The Kansas State High School Activities Association announced at the 39th annual Kansas Coaching School that the state has gained permission in the 1 1971 football season to experiment with a tie-breaking rule in its high school football games. Brice Durbin, executive secretary of the association, said the National Alliance Football Rules Committee had approved Kansas being the first state to use the tie-breaking system on an experimental basis. In the case of games which are tied at the end of regulation time, Durbin explained, each team would be given the football at its opponent's 10- yard line and given four downs in which to score -- by touchdown or field goal, and with the option of the one or t w o -p o i n t conversion after touchdowns. The team ahead after each has had an equal number of opportunities to score from the 10 is the winner. If one team scored on its opportunity from the 10 and the other didn't, the team which scored is the winner. If neither scores, or they score the same number of points In the four-down situation, they continue into a second, third, etc., overtime period until one team outscores the other from the 10. he said, "and now it's up to me to show if I can do the job or not. "It's not a case of panic. I don't even think of that word. I have no doubts about myself. In fact, I have a lot of faith that I'm a good passer, a good football player, but door-die is exactly' the way I look at it." Douglas and Sam Havrilak, a third-year player being tried at quarterback--a position he played in college at Bucknell --are competing for the No. 2 spot behind veteran Earl Morrall as John Unitas recovers from surgery. H a v r 5 l a k , 4-for-16 while playing the first half last week, is expected to play the third quarter against the Bears with Morrall taking over in the fourth period. KARL DOUGLAS . . a starting chance Texas Is Oil Bowl Favorite WICHITA FALLS Iff) - Texas is rated a touchdown choice over Oklahoma tonight in the 34th annual Oil Bowl Clash of Red River schoolboy football supremacy and observers are wondering just how big the spread would be if there were more South Texans on the team. Only six Southerners are on the Texas squad from last week's Texas High School Coaches Association All-Star football game in which the South mangled the North 65-0. "Texas sure has some good players at home," says one writer who covers the game annually. "Oklahoma has its best chance since it won 17-7 in 19C9." Of course, the Texas cupboard is far from bare. Such schoolboy household names as tailback Mike Thomas of Greenville, wingback J o e y Aboussie of Wichita Falls, 1 tight end Tommy Frank of Austin Reagan, split end Jeff Jobe of Corsicana, tacule John Rhiddlehoover of A b i l e n e Cooper and center Jim Frasure of Houston Westchester dot the Texas roster with talent. Taiwan Wins KANSAS CITY W - Eight table tennis champions from Taiwan easily won exhibition matches over amateuvs from the Kansas City area Thursday. The Free China group is touring the United States under sponsorship of the International Council of Christian Churches. BILL'S SHOE BOX MEN'S POT LUCK SALE FRIDAY SATURDAY ONLY! THE MALL ONLY! /cur BANKAMERICARD HUSH PUPPIES JARMAH NUNNBUSH VAtUISTO charge! THE MALL ONLY! Padre-Staples Mall 991-6855

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