Independent Press-Telegram from Long Beach, California on July 9, 1961 · Page 137
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Independent Press-Telegram from Long Beach, California · Page 137

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Long Beach, California
Issue Date:
Sunday, July 9, 1961
Page:
Page 137
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EDITOR'S NOTE: Charlie Manna originally planned to become an opera star. After 10 years of vocal training, he was drafted into the Army where he produced camp shows and became a comedian. Upon discharge, Manna returned to opera, and wrote comedy skits which he inflicted on groups at house parties. At one such gathering, Carl Reiner heard him and brought him to the attention of the William Morris Agency, which has boohed him into such major night spots as the Klue Angel, Copacabana and Shamrock Hilton. Television viewers have seen Charlie on the Erf Sullivan, Jack Poor and Garry Moore shoii'S, and record fans have been buying his joke album, Manna Overboard. My favorite jokes by CHARLIE MANNA A MAN IN A $10,000 196! Cadillac pulled up alongside of a friend in a 1955 Chevy. "Hey, George," he yelled, "what's all those rattles I hear in your car?" Without a moment's hesitation George replied, "That's $9,000 jingling around in my pocket." AN ATOMIC BLAST reduced the earth to a mass of rubble. The last survivor, an ape, emerged from a cave, rubbing his eyes and looking around. A few days later a female gorilla emerged from another cave. "Say, do you have anything to eat?" asked the male gorilla. Without saying a word, the female gorilla returned to the cave and came out with an apple. The male gorilla took one look at the apple. "Oh, no!" he exclaimed. "You're not going to start that all over again!" THIS FIGHT MANAGER was talking to one of his fighters. "If I told yon once," he said, "1 told you a hundred times--I can't get you a fight with Punchy McGurky. YOU'RE Punchy McGurky!!!" LITTLE JOHNNY developed a nasty habit of using strong language around the house. His mother warned him that if he continued, she'd pack his bag and put him out. Since bad habits are hard to break, little Johnny forgot himself again. Sure enough, his mother packed his hag and put him outside the door. There he stood for an entire hour while his mother watched him from inside. Finally she opened the door and said, "Well, why don't yon leave?" To which Johnny replied, "I was just wondering where the hell I could go." THE VISITING CHILD PSYCHOLOGIST was advising the second grade teacher. "You don't hold the interest of your pupils, Miss Jones. When they come in, I'll prove that they arc not paying the slightest hit of attention to what is going on." Presently the youngsters filed in and took their places. The visitor asked the class for a number, and a little girl gave 35. The visitor in large clear figures wrote 53 on the blackboard and called for another number. Receiving 19 he wrote 91, and for 47 he wrote 74. After several moments of this, the visitor glanced triumphantly at Miss Jones, when suddenly a voice called out, "66 -- let's sec w h a t you can do with that!" A TIPSY PLAYBOY burst out of El Morocco, took a flying leap and landed on the scat of his pants in the street. The doorman rushed over and said, "Are you all right, sir?" The playboy glared at the doorman and replied, "Yeah, I'm all right . . . but who moved my convertible?" jEiisEYiTES, who insist their drivers arc the world's worst, tell of a policeman who asked an injured pedestrian if he had noticed the license number of the driver who struck him. "No," was the reply. "But I'd remember his laugh anywhere." A LITTLE 4-YRArt-OLi) GIRL and a little 3- ycar-old boy walked hand-in-hand up to the front door of a neighbor's house. Standing on her tip-toes, the little girl was just able to reach the doorbell. The lady of the house asked the little girl what it was she wanted, and the little girl said, "We're playing house. This is my husband and I am his wife. May we come in?" Thoroughly enchanted by the scene confronting her, the lady said, "By all means, do come in." Once inside, she offered the children lemonade and cookies which they graciously accepted. When a second tall glass of lemonade was offered, the little giri refused by saying, "No thank you. We have to go now. My husband just wet his pants." Two M E N were marooned on an island for 1 5 yc,irs. One day, a giant economy-sized cola Ijottlc floated up to shore. "Good heavens," cried one of the men as he picked up the Iwtlle. "We've shrunk!" · ATTENTION, OUTDOOR COOKS! Win Praise For Your Steaks-EveryTime - KITCHEN BOUQUET DOES IT! GET READY! Wilh steak at room temperature, cut off most or all of fat (it catches fire and smudges). Then, brush Kitchen Bouquet generously ovcrentirc surface of the steak and let stand. For best results, brush on Kitchen Bouquet about an hour before grilling time. CHARCOAL BROIL! With grill close to white-hot charcoal, scar each side of steak I minute. Next, raise grill about 2 inches. Then, turning steak at regular intervals with longs (not fork), broil to rare, medium or well done. If grill is not adjustable, turn sleak more frequently. RESULT! An evenly broiled, flavorful steak with a tasty thin crust that has helped seal in savory juices, cut down shrinkage. Yes, you've won praise for your steak. And Kitchen Bouquet did it! YOU WILL WIN PRAISE EVERY TIME . . . for your charcoal-broiled steaks, broilers, chops and hamburgers, when you brush on magic Kitchen Bouquet before grilling. You'll win praise, too, for your rotisseric-roasted meats and fowl when you brush on Kitchen Bouquet after most of fat has cooked ofT. Kitchen bouquet--a favorite of good cooks and chefs for over 80 years--is a magic blend of 13 garden vegetables, herbs and spices. Kitchen llouquel does so much ... costs to little

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