The News Journal from Wilmington, Delaware • Page 13

Monday, Aug. 15, 1988 People i detour from his European tour to Monte Carlo where Sammy Davis career, Jackson and his brothers for Davis, who is 62. Michael Jackson (right) took a make a surprise appearance in Jr. is performing. Early in his the Jackson Five opened When a television crew arrived late, Rubin went back to the door and got his pizza back to re-enact the event.

At one point, the unwieldy, 3-foot-wide pizza slipped off its cardboard platter and onto the concrete driveway. Dooneshury by Garry YOU SEEN THE VICE PRESIPENT, SENATOR? NO, FROM HI5 Only in America "What a country! I never expected this to happen," says Yakov Smirnoff, 37, the immigrant comic from the Soviet Union who will lead the Republican Trudeau HE PIPN'T MAKE IT. WHAT I HEAR HANPLERS ARB KEEPING HIM UNPER WRAPS UNTIL TOMORROW. The News-Journal papers B3 Urban legends by Jan Harold Brunvand Rabbit tale hops around the country As far as urban legends go, this is the Year of the Rabbit or the Season of the Rabbit at least. The hottest story going around this summer is one about dead rabbit that gets blow-dried.

I call it "The Hare Drier." I told the story here a month or so ago, little realizing how popular it already was. When I opened my backlog of mail, other versions of "The Hare Drier" came hopping out like multiplying bunnies in a magician's act. It goes like this: One day a woman is horrified to see her dog holding a dead rabbit in its mouth. Her neighbors have always kept a pet rabbit in a cage behind the house, and she recognizes the dead animal as theirs. The woman cleans the rabbit, blow-dries its fur and replaces it in its cage in a lifelike posture.

The next day, she sees a police car parked in front of her neighbors' house. Curious, she goes outside and asks what's going on. "A nuisance call," the officer says. "Their pet rabbit died yesterday, and some weirdo dug it up and put it back in its cage." If you haven't heard this one yet, you must lead a sheltered life. In the dozens of versions I've collected, details vary the kind of dog or the state of relations between the neighbors but all versions agree that the dead bunny was blow-dried and returned to its hutch.

The earliest printed version I've come across so far appeared in James Dent's column in the Charleston, (W.Va.) Gazette on May 12. "This story sounds a little like an urban fable," Dent commented, "but the reader who told me the tale assures me that it actually happened." That's pretty much the line I got from the people in Chicago, California, Pennsylvania, Washington, D.C., Maryland and Utah who sent me their versions. I also got two letters from England saying that the legend was told there in late May. One version featured a dead cat instead of a dead rabbit. Then one afternoon I got a telephone call from a man named Bruce in Philadelphia.

He apologized for the intrusion but he was dying to know whether a story he'd heard in a bagel shop that morning was an urban legend. I told him to start telling it I'd interrupt when I recognized the story. "Well, in a suburb here called Chestnut Hills," he began, "there's supposed to be this woman who had a large German shepherd as a pet "Stop!" I said. "Her neighbor kept a rabbit in her back yard, right?" Bruce had, of course, heard "The Hare Drier." A couple of days later, at dinner time, a radio talk-show host in Los Angeles who consults me occasionally about urban legends called to ask if I would take a question live on the air about a new story that was going around. In this host's version, a baby sitter finds the dead rabbit, washes it in Wool-ite and hangs it by its ears in the shower to dry.

The next afternoon I came into the English department at the University of Utah where I teach, just as Laurie Spet-sas, our department assistant, was sorting the mail. Handing me my letters, Laurie started to tell me a hilarious dog-and-rabbit story she had heard on a local talk show the night before. So I played a little game with her. "Here are five letters," I said. "I predict that at least one of them contains the same story." The first four letters lacked the rabbit tale, and I began to fear that my gambit would fail.

Then I opened letter No. 5. Presto! It contained a clipping of Ron Blankenbaker's June 17 column in the Salem (Ore.) Statesman-Journal, in which he repeated a story about a man whose hunting dog had dragged home the corpse of the neighbor's cat and so on. I handed Laurie the clipping, very pleased with myself. She protested that this was a cat story, not a rabbit story.

So I read her the conclusion of Blankenbaker's column: "At about the same time I was being told about the kitty cat and the hunting dog, the same story was being told to a colleague only the victim was a neighbor's pet bunny rabbit." Some days I maintain my reputation just by opening my mail. Professor Jan Harold Brunvand of the University of Utah writes for United Features Syndicate. His column appears Mondays and Thursdays in Pace. His mailing address is Department of English, University of Utah, Salt Lake City, Utah 84112. by Angela K.

Renkoski Doing time in luxury NEW YORK John Zaccaro Jr. is spending his four-month prison term for selling cocaine in a luxury apartment in Vermont with maid service, cable TV and privileges at the YMCA next door. The son of former vice presidential candidate Geraldine Ferraro is staying in one of 12 units in a building designed for expense-account business people on short assignments in Burlington, Vt. Addison County State's Attorney John Quinn, who prosecuted Zaccaro, took a dimmer view. "This guy is a drug felon and he's living in conditions that 99.9 percent of the people of Vermont couldn't Zaccaro, 24, was convicted in April of selling a quarter-gram of cocaine to an undercover police officer while a student at Middlebury College in 1986.

All but four months of his one-to-five-year sentence was suspended. Piece of pizza for peace A peace activist broke a 63-day liquid-only fast one day for each million dollars allegedly spent on "Rambo III" by biting into a giant pizza with a pepperoni peace sign and delivering it to Sylvester Stallone's door in Malibu, Calif. Jerry Rubin, a campaigner against cinema violence and war toys, didn't see Stallone but was more graciously received than in a previous visit when someone squirted him with water. Rubin's wife, Marissa, and two friends were on hand as the activist, with media watching, presented the pizza to a housekeeper. Family doctor by Allan H.

Bruckheim Incontinence is delicate issue for the elderly My mother, who is 80, lives with us. Lately I've noticed her bed linens and undergarments seem to be stained with bowel movements. She won't talk about it, so what can I do? i. Bowel incontinence is a common problem with elderly patients. Sometimes it is a problem for which nothing is done because the patient refuses to discuss it.

Basic human pride and dignity are at stake. It signals for the patient a return to infancy and the lack of ability to care for themselves. Nursing homes loom on the horizon with all the lack of respect and independence they entail. First, take your mother to her doctor and talk about the subject, recognizing it might take more than one visit for her to feel comfortable enough to talk about it. Impaction is the most common cause of incontinence.

It means a stool is stuck in the rectum and the incontinence takes the form of the soft seeps that flow around the hard mass very easily diagnosed through rectal examination. Some underlying disease may be the culprit: diverticulitis, colitis, diabetes and damage to the rectal muscles. There are times when the sphincter muscle, which controls the closing of the anus, khas been damaged. Neurogenic disorders (disorders of the nervous regulatory system) can be either -local or part of a general condition. IThere can be local degeneration of the bowel and rectal muscles due to chronic use of laxatives or other drugs.

Mental impairment can also be a cause. Sometimes older folks, especially stroke or dementia victims, forget what rectal fullness feels like. One good treatment will be an optimistic attitude for your mom. Treatment of impaction and neurogenic disorders begins with a regular bowel program, which must be consistent and attainable. He will encourage a high-fiber diet, plenty of fluids and planning for a time of day for a bowel movement.

Suppositories might be suggested, initially once a day and eventually every other day. If success isn't achieved, he'll suggest one of the products on the market for bowel and urinary incontinence pads that attach to undergarments, underpants with pads attached and disposable diapers. Many cleansera are available to 'wash the area and stop odors, and creams are available to soothe. Dr. Allan H.

Bruckheim is a professor at the University of Medicine and Dentistry of New Jersey. Send questions to him do Tribune Media Services, P.O. Box 119, Orlando, Fla. 32802-0119. convention in the Pledge of Allegiance tonight in New Orleans.

A man whose pointed political humor has played to a growing audience since he came to the United States in 1977, Smirnoff became an American citizen in 1986. "I look at the voting situation as a way to give back to your society what it has given you, like freedom of speech," he says. "In the Soviet Union, we had freedom of speech, too, but here you have freedom after you speak." Say, it 's your birthday Today: Actress Wendy Hiller is 76. Playwright Robert Bolt is 64. Actress Rose Marie is 63, Actor Mike Connors is 63.

Civil rights activist Vernon Jordan is 53. Broadcast journalist and au- thor Linda Ellerbee is 44. Britain's Princess Anne is 38. Tuesday: Former Israeli Prime Minister Menachem Begin is 75. Actor Fess Parker is 63.

Sportscaster Frank Gifford is 58. Singer Eydie Gorme is 56. Actress Julie Newmar is 53. Actress Lesley Ann Warren is 42.. Wednesday: Actress Maureen O'Hara is 68.

Singer Belinda Carlisle is 30. Thursday: Former Secretary of Defense Caspar Weinberger is 71. Actress Shelley Winters is 66. Movie director Roman Polanski is 55. Actor-comedian Martin Mull is 45.

Friday: Winifred G. Ward, a co-founder of Wilmington Blue Print Service and Wilmington resident, is 100. Producer Gene Roddenberry is 67. Jockey Willie Shoemaker is 57. Actor Gerald McRaney is 40.

Saturday: Actor Sam Melville is 48. Musician Isaac Hayes is 46. The Prime Minister of India, Rajiv Gandhi, is 44. emARr oaING -rum's' pUJTIN6 period vest and greatcoat from Stoney Brook Historical Uniforms in Cedarville, N.J. All I've received so far is a letter saying they were having a hard time finding buttons for these coats.

I think there has been ample time to complete my coat, and I've written two letters saying this. G.M., Greenwood The number of Civil War re-enactment groups is growing and the huge re-enactment of the Battle of Gettysburg this July just added to the interest. The Stoney Brook Historical Uniforms Co. is a small outfit working out of a hangar in New Jersey. It uses authentic materials and buttons to make the uniforms it creates so they're as close to the originals as possible.

Why a company with such a specialized market and a product with so much hand labor involved would ever hold a sale, we don't know. But Stoney Brook did, and it was almost the company's Waterloo. The owner claimed he had a sale in 1986 and was able to handle it, but this time the orders overshot what he had expected based on what happened in the '86 sale. You have your coat, sans buttons. The owner told Helping Hand he couldn't find a supply of the proper eagle-style buttons, so your coat was shipped with plain brass ones.

As soon as he locates more eagle buttons, he'll send you a set. The vest will follow shortly. Helping Hand solves problems, gets answers, cuts red tape, stands up for your rights and investigates complaints. Write a brief description of your problem or question to: Helping Hand, News-Journal Papers, P.O. Box 1111, Wilmington, Del.

19899. Your name and address must be in the letter, along with a copy of both sides of your canceled check, if your problem involves something you paid for, but did not receive. No phone calls, please. 1 A frMn'i GICU I Changing a name after 41 years of use Volume of records with the old name could make it legally unnecessary THEY FIGURE REAGANS RECEP- TION IN THE BOUJL TONIGHT COULP Helping Hand Word processor I've heard there are companies that make little electronic devices the size of a small calculator that can translate English into a foreign language. You type in the English word, and it displays the equivalent word in French.

This permits people to write letters to people in France even if they don't speak French. Where can I get one of these? L.V., Lindside, W.V. We can tap you into an electronic translator, but we doubt it will enable you to write letters in French any more than a printed dictionary would. These little machines are just the electronic age's answer to an EnglishFrench dictionary. You would need to 'know quite a bit about sentence structure, verb conjugation and idiom to be able to communicate your message.

But it's a neat little device. If you want to send for one, Exeter's, 6 Hughes Suite 100, Irvine, Calif. 92718, has them for $69 plus $3.50 shipping. The company's toll-free number is (800) 525-4477. The translators come in EnglishFrench, EnglishSpanish or EnglishGerman.

Closer to home, the Ninth Street Book Shop in Wilmington carries these electronic translators. This shop carries an extensive collection of cassette tapes for learning a foreign language including the multicassette sets issued by the Foreign Service Institute to train'diplomatic personnel. You can also rent language tapes from the Wilmington Public Library for $1 a week. Battle weary On Jan. 2 I ordered a Civil War Bob Garfield This woman is one of roughly 175 members in the ABCC.

Christopher founded it in 1979, shortly after a coworker gave him a gift of 800 cards, many of quite old. "It just piqued my interest, shall we say? I started looking at collectibles magazines and noticing other collectors. There had been a business card club before, but it just folded. So I said, 'Hey, I'll start my own The thrills have been non-stop ever since. While traveling on business, he convenes informal regional membership dftiiiftnit After all these years I found out my name is not what I thought it was.

It had something to do with my mother and father. For 41 years I have gone by one name, and I would like to have my name changed legally to that. How do I go about doing this, and how much does it cost? D.B., Wilmington The Court of Common Pleas in each county has a kit with instructions for changing your name. The court's fees are usually less than $20, but you are required to advertise your intention to change your name in a newspaper of general circulation in the area where you live. That can cost considerably more.

If you have been using the same name for 41 years, however, we doubt you need' to do anything. If it's on your driver's license, voter's registration card, charge accounts, tax returns, employment records, it is already your legal name. The only trouble you might run into could be when you need a copy of your birth certificate if you are applying for Social Security benefits, for or a passport. But to be eligible for Social Security you have to have worked at a job covered by Social Security, for which you would have been required to have a Social Security card. Whatever name is on that card is the one under which your work credits are filed.

When the time comes to apply for Social Security, you should have enough records with the name you have been using to satisfy the Social Security Administration. If you want to get your birth certificate changed, you must file a petition with the court for a change of name. When it's granted, the information goes to the Bureau of Vital Statistics in Dover where it is noted on the birth record. If you were born in another state, the change is sent to the office of vital statistics in that state. hours and hours and hours," says the Cadillac Motor Car Division middle manager.

"It's a hobby where you can find that American creativity is alive and well. I find daily so many unique, unusual, creative cards that it would blow your mind." In all, he has 35,000 business cards divided into 90 categories: humorous cards, graphically unusual cards, celebrity cards, antique cards. But while this seems like a large number of business cards, it is by no means the nation's largest collection. "I have a lady in Wisconsin who has the largest business card collection I've ever heard of. She has over 200,000.

She's collected them since she was a kid." Collector gets down to business in his quest for calling cards Boone. The famous Berg collection is said to be valued at $250,000. But, generally speaking, business cards have not established themselves as collectibles of value. "Business cards haven't come into the hobby world. They just haven't made it yet," the ABCC president says.

But he does not dispair. Nothing this exciting can stay quiet for long. "I feel more of a vanguard, pace setter, new arrival. We're blazing the trail fqr the business card collectors of the future. When the time comes, we'll be there." Bob Garfield writes for the Crain News Service.

His column appears in the Sunday News Journal and Mondays in Pace. WARREN, Mich. Darrell L. Christopher laughs to think of the oddball things people collect. "Corks!" he says.

"Barbed wire. I know a guy who collects paper clips and believe you, me he's serious about it. I do meet some people who collect some weird things." Christopher can't exactly imagine why anybody would collect paper clips. Not when there's a whole wonderful world out there of art, of natural beauty and bounty and, obviously, of business cards. He is president of the American Business Card Club, and one of the relative few to have tasted the sweet nectar that is card collecting.

"I could talk to you about this for meetings in hotel lobbies, where he gets to swap and compare notes with other members. Once, in Beverly Hills, he was allowed to peek at some of the collection of Gerald Berg, whose Sitting Bull and Adolph Hitler cards are legendary within business-card-amassment circles. (Berg isn't a member. "He's above the club, I think he thinks," Christopher opines.) Christopher likes celebrity cards, so he sends his own Darrell L. Christopher ABCC business card to famous people and hopes to get collector cards in re- turn.

Thus he's copped cards from Lee Iacocca, Chuck Connors, Red Adair, Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, Mel Blanc, Isaac Asimov (he describes himself as "Natural Henry Kissinger and Pat ilffti ilhiiiTinTfrnlVlfc wTViltli hkjtt eh, X.T, ft fW 0i Amt. ni fx r-.