St. Louis Post-Dispatch from St. Louis, Missouri • Page 134

2S ST. LOUIS POST-DISPATCH SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 1996 JOAN DAMES Priory HoMOree: Desloge Is 1 1th To Get Luke Rigby Award 0 -I Thomas Frerking and Louis Rigby Award. si Arts and Education Council honoree Leigh Gerdine (left), and president Pat Rich, with honorees William Gass, Jo Throdahl, Heikki Seppa and John Bachmann. Graciela Desloge with the Rev. Desloge, recipient of the Luke Randy Costas (left) and Susan Priory School Black-Tie Dinner.

news anchor Karen Foss as co-emcee with Jack Lane, managing director of Stages. The dinner last Monday night kicked off of the A E's annual campaign. Pat Rich, president, hoped to top $2.3 million this year to continue support for 160 arts and education agencies. Rich said: "Children who have arts training do well in both arts and sciences. More people in St.

Louis attend arts events than all sports events combined." Chairwoman Pat Whitaker worked magic with airy Japanese-style floral arrangements of white tulips and a handful of other flowers, keeping the cost down and making the dinner festive, as well as delicious. Pat appointed Mary Ann Hogan as chairwoman of the entertainment committee and treated the sophisticated crowd to a stunning performance by Atrek Dance Company, a hilarious segment called "Sure Thing" from a play at The New Theater (or TNT, as it's called); the magnificent pinging of soprano Christine Brewer accompanied by pianist Kirt courtesy of Opera Theatre; and Seth Carlin, pianist, and violinist and St. Louis Symphony Orchestra concertmaster David Halen playing a variation on a Haydn sonata composed by honoree Leigh Gerdine. The Presentation of Excellence in the Arts Award went to three recipients. They are as follows: Metalsmith Heikki Seppa, who recalled that when he settled at Washington University from his native Finland, fellow Finn Eero Saarinen was building the Gateway Arch.

Seppa said, "I thought that if they would put up something like that downtown, this was a good place to be." Curiously, the sculpture given to Seppa and the others must have had special significance for Seppa as it was the work of his former student David Jaworski. MISS a Author, teacher and philosopher William Gass, whose third novel, "The Tunnel," has just been published and whose classes at Washington University are often so oversubscribed that they must be held in Graham Chapel. Gass said that 27 years ago, when he came to the University's English department which included two poet laureates, great fiction writers and "brilliant essayist Gerald Early" he knew he had come to the right place. Gass added that he was speaking for all his colleagues with the salutation "To the literature we love and our belief in creative freedom." Volunteer Josephine 5 Throdahl is a lovely heavy-hitter in the St. Louis art world.

The former student of voice, violin and piano described herself with characteristic modesty as "lucky to have been in on the ground floor of Opera Theatre 20 years ago under Richard Gaddes." She served as chairman of the board for nine of the 1 0 years Charles MacKay has been general manager of the opera company. MacKay says the can-do woman has "dimples of iron." Jo said, "I've watched 50 young singers move to the stage of the Metropolitan Opera and in 20 short years seen Opera Theatre become America's finest regional opera theater." Other honorees were: John Dubinsky, who accepted the Corporate Support of the Arts Award on behalf of Mark Twain Banks, with a salute to Adam Aronson, who founded both the bank and its significant art collection, a policy kept vigorous by those who followed Aronson. Leigh Gerdine, who gracefully accepted the Lifetime Achievement Award on behalf of himself and his wife, "Alice, my co-conspirator in all good things." Gerdine's lively wit and enduring charm keep him beloved by all. From his days at Washington University's MANNERS outrageous conditions, and you do not want to leave a small child to wander the streets. But it is high time you set some rules with the parents.

Just don't let the indignation you justifiably feel tempt you to be rude. GENTLE IS THE WORD for the St. Louis Priory School Black-Tie Dinner, given by the Fathers Club annually. This year, a record crowd of 560 gathered Jan. 27 and earned $120,000 for the scholarship fund.

Honored with the Luke Rigby Award, for which there have been 10 previous recipients, was Louis Desloge, who with his wife, Graciela, and his eight handsome children, is a beacon representing all that the Priory stands for. As Desloge put it in his brief acceptance speech, the school stands for "strong spiritual and moral leadership to get our society back on track. Priory graduates are for the -21st century." Desloge, a graduate of the School of Foreign Service at Georgetown, had mastered both Spanish and Portuguese while still an undergraduate. He met his wife in Cuba, and they have traveled extensively, both for pleasure and on business through his Watlow Electric Manufacturing Co. They are described as "citizens of the world." Among the 560 guests were three Japanese, including Alex Sakaguchi and his wife, Miyo, who were celebrating 25 years of doing -business with Desloge.

Watlow Co. manufactures equipment and has factories in Germany, France and Japan. Louis Desloge III, the honoree's son, spoke thanks on behalf of the family. Then father and son embraced to much applause. Among the guests were 1994's honoree, Christian B.

Peper, and his wife of two days, Barbara, who as Barbara Long, was a Civil War historian who published several books. Asked how they met, Peper said, "Barbara was the daughter of my aunt's second husband." Peper heads the law firm of Peper Martin Jensen Maichel Hetlage, and one of its members, Tom Schlafly, recently married Ulrike Karst. The Schlaflys were still in German wedding attire, Tom in Loden green and Ulrike in her wedding dress. The bodice was fastened with a shield pin in green and gold in the emblem of Tom's St. Louis Brewery.

Guests included Harriet and David Cronin; Peggy and Dr. Max Burgdorf; Brother Symeon Gillette; Shirley and George Bidleman; Joelle and Bill Travis; Taeko Lewis; Abbot Thomas Frerking; Margaret Marsh; Ginny and Joe Louvier; the Rev. Timothy Horner, who was quick to say that the spelling should not be the same as the Cardinal relief pitcher Hoerner; Susan and Gene Kalhorn; Kathleen Desloge; Nancy and Rick Desloge; Pat and Dick Dieckherber; Debbie and Tom Epstein; Randy Costas; Nancy Warner, president of the Alumni's Mothers Club; the Rev. What To Do Dear Miss Manners: In my local supermarket, I at times observe shoppers snapping off the bottoms of broccoli, mushrooms or asparagus, presumably to avoid paying for this less desirable part of the vegetable. "I have refrained from commenting, although I am concerned about the dishonesty.

How do I handle this without an angry confrontation or appearing as a self-appointed member of the moral police? Gentle Reader: You can be a self-appointed informer instead. Miss Manners is not sure that this is morally on a higher plane (or lower one, as you say you do not want to tangle with morality), but it is safer. Tell the manager of the store that you love the fresh produce, but are suddenly reluctant to buy any because people are right now picking off the best parts and leaving the rest. The manager will be off like a shot to deal with the offenders. Dear Miss Manners: Is it rude to discuss class or even use the word? It is my experience that people who insist that we don't have classes in America, just so-called cultural differences, are class-conscious hypocrites.

The more they protest their egalitarian classlessness, the more they despise poor people in general and their own background in particular. They are also snobs who crave to impress people with appearances of wealth and other class status, and to hobnob with upper-class people. I bring all this up because class-consciousness and class snobbery involve dress codes. Humans advertise their class identity with dress, and they express class bigotry by despising the way lower classes -dress. I am of working-class stock and I--- Kalhorn at the the St.

Louis Vegetables care of them. "They're lovely children and we're happy to see them," you should conclude, "but please call before letting them come over, and we will certainly do the same when they suggest that our children visit you." Among the guests at the St. Louis Priory School dinner were 1994 honoree, Christian B. Peper, and Barbara, his wife of two days. music department, through his years been success after success, as founder of the Opera Theatre, A spec.il tribute was delivered in while serving as president of honor of the late Stanley Elkin, Webster University, and his current prolific novelist and teacher at activity reviving the Sheldon, it's Washington University.

Paul Kidner, Prior; Dr. Cynthia Larson; Ann Crane; Joan and Doug Courterman Marilyn and Hank Schake; Mary Caye and Bill Jones; Jerri and David Hoffmann; the Rev. Gregory Mohrmann, headmaster, with his mother, Mavis Mohrmann; Adele and Tom Daake; Anne and Neil Ryan; Beth and David Horan; Charlotte and Richard Tao; Ann and Mike Lause; Sue and Bo Naunheim; Joann Harvey; Mary and Dr. Daniel O'Brien; Karen and Mike Anderson; Joan and Bill Kiburz, who shared the happy news that their -daughter Annie, whose miraculous recovery from a devastating automobile accident was chronicled in the Post-Dispatch, is returning to work there on April Mary and Tony Bommarito; the Rev. Luke Rigby, former abbot for whom the award is named; Susan and Steve Hall; Mary and Jerry Gunther; Jean and Andy Zinsmeyer; Marjorie and Dr.

J. Allen Thiel; Chutty Wight; Beverly and Dr. John Wagner; Tom Tuthill; and dinner chairman Jim Murphy, class of '61, who brought much glee saying from the podium "When Father Abbot asked me to do this, I wondered why a distinguished Benedictine monk would ask a lowly Irish contractor to chair this dinner." The Fifth Annual Arts Awards Dinner of the Arts and Education Council of St. Louis filled the Ritz-Carlton ballroom with 430 happy people. The full award ceremony with sparkling entertainment by A E-supported talent will be telecast twice (Feb.

21 and 25) on KETC (Channel 9) with KSDK (Channel 5) When You occupation and unashamed of it. Generally speaking, working-class men do not wear not to do so is basic to our identity. Neckties are a badge that distinguishes upper- and middle-class men from working-class men. A very important reason why working-class men don't like neckties and don't want to wear them even at weddings and funerals is because this class badge misrepresents their identity. Honest working men don't like to pretend to be what they are not.

Pretentiousness, which feels good to middle-class people (and may well be vital to their economic survival) is painful to us. Gentle Reader: Uh-oh. Just when Miss Manners was about to deliver one of those class denials you despise, she picked up a telling clue about you. Nobody who observed and understood the people you claim to represent would foist upon them that European idea of a proletariat class identity. The working people of America have never had the mind-set you describe "We know our place, and we don't aspire to imitate our betters." Rather, there is the properly egalitarian attitude of "We deserve the best." America has economic classes, to be sure, but not social classes sealed off from one another by the circumstances of birth.

So, yes, it would be rude to suggest that there is such a permanent identity. Funny you should mention dress. For some years now, Miss Manners has noticed, the rich have aspired to imitate the casual styles of working people. Yet high formality, in the form of fanciful elaborations of the comparatively plain late 19th- and 20th-century tradition, is more common at weddings at the lower end of the financial scale than at the Witness An Assault On Supermarket The polite approach is to tell them that you are concerned over the children's apparent misunderstanding of where they are supposed to be and worried about the danger of their simply appearing when you may not be able to take and jAnnivetsazLes I higher. Miss Manners does have to agree with you that there is an unfortunate amount of snobbery in society.

She would only add that not all of it is by people pretending to be richer than they are. Dear Miss Manners: I would like advice on how to deal with the children in our new neighborhood although the problem lies with their parents. The neighbor's children like to play with ours, ages 3'2 and 2. 1 don't mind if they come over, but they usually stay for hours, sometimes bringing their 3-year-old cousin. Last Sunday, the neighbor's 8-year-old had been here two hours when I sent her home so that my kids could eat lunch.

One minute later, she knocked on the door, explaining, "No one was I feel the parents should call or bring the kids over so that I know when they are here. They should not climb the fence to our yard, and their stays should be short. When my 6-year-old niece stays with us, I suggest that she and the neighbor's children play at the neighbor's for a change. I know that type of retaliation is incorrect, but it seems only fair. Gentle Reader: Retaliation? Just a minute.

Miss Manners admires your understanding of the situation, and she wants to help get you put of a difficult position. But let us have no talk of retaliating by sending innocent children where they may be unwelcome or unsupervised. As you point out, the problem was created by parents not their children. Their neglect in teaching their children visiting manners is only part of the problem they seem to be neglecting their children altogether, perhaps expecting you to pick up the slack or perhaps not troubling themselves to wonder. You do not want to humiliate a child, even one sent to you under i I 4 burgeon Slaclt Shannon Kelly Turgeon anil Leroy Slack were married October at St.

Peter's United Church of Christ in Kansas City, Missouri. Dr. Anton lacobs officiated. A reception was held at Jasper's Restaurant. The bride is the daughter of Mr.

and Mrs. Ron L. Howitt of Leawood, Kansas and the late Orville L. Turgeon. The groom is the son of Leroy Slack of Seneca, Kansas and the late Erma Slack.

Peggy Ramsey was matron of honor. Julie Howitt bridesmaid, best man Robert Kirk-land, groomsman Gerald Ramsey. Steven Ramsey and John Howitt ushers, Elizabeth Kirkland, flowergirl and Adam Slack, ring bearer. The bride graduated from Southern Illinois University and is sales manager for the Radisson Suites Kansas City. The groom is with Seal-O-Matic.

Following their honeymoon in Sarasota, the couple live in Raymore, Missouri. Bradford IVaLk Mr. and Mrs. H. Eugene Bradford announce the engagement of their daughter, Miss Andrea Marie Bradford to Mr.

Brian Anthony Walsh, son of Timothy and Paula Walsh of Littleton, Colorado, former residents of Lake Saint Louis. Miss Bradford was graduated from Westminster College and is a Corporate Account Relocation Coordinator tor United Van Lines World Headquarters. Mr. Walsh was graduated from Parks College of Saint Louis University. He is an airline pilot with Mesaba Aviation, Northwest Airlink in Michigan.

An April wedding is planned at Saint Francis Xavier Church. announcements appear in the Sunday Circulation of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch. lll llni Wedding, engagements and rOI IMIUUliauun dllU I Kites itrgiuuniK yuui mutuupii-ciiicni vein jciinri nun tit jiu-ujw 1.