The Pittsburgh Press from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania • Page 6

1, THE I'lTTSBURGx PRESS DA 1 V. I XG: JANUARY 19 6 FUNNY IDEAS IN Regencv of the Lady THE PITTSBURG PRESS DAILY "NEWS Entered as second-class matter at Pittsburg. Pa. OFFICIAL NEWSPAPER OF THE CITIES OF PITTSBURG ALLEGHENY AND OF ALLEGHENY COUNTY. By Mrs.

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Tribune Building, Ner York. Stock Exchange, Chicago. "One thing I like about Paul is that he always keeps hi3 word." "Tesi. I believe none of his friends would take his word for anything." Chelsea (Mass.) Gazette. The editor glanced up.

A grave-looking yceth stood in the doorway. He wore a broad-brimmed black hat and a white tie. In addition to some other things, and nodded with dignity as he caught the editor's eye. "What can I do for you? inquired the latter the editor, not the eye. The young man stepped forward, and the editor's heart warmed to him.

He thought that there, brightly contrasted with the frivolity of most men of his ago, stood the serious youth. Life was not all a playground for him. "What can I do for you, sir?" he asked again. The youth coughed to clear his throat. "Sir." he said, "Mr.

Editor, some o' th" girls down to our place hev mislaid their rules for flirtin' with the handkerchief, an' they'd like to have you publish them again." Cleveland Plain Dealer. "Riter says that postoffice clerk insulted fcim." "In what way?" "Why. when he handed in 'his package of manuscript to mail it the clerk inquired, Is It first-class? "Philadelphia Bulletin. "Isn't it funny that they call this a 'plum pudding," said the first man at lunch, "when there isn't a plum in it at all?" "Oh, I don't know." replied the other. "Webster defines a plumb as 'a little lump or weight of lead.

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HERSHMAN, President. SATURDAY EVENING, Miss Gator I hear you ran across dr. Allie Yes, and I'll bet he has that dude hunter yesterday. been feeling down in the mouth ever ELKIN. It Is rather singular, in view of the warnings that the dominant faction in the Republican State organization in Pennsylvania have received, to find the report that Senator Quay is for John P.

Elkin for governor, accepted in numerous quarters as equivalent to Elkin's nomination. If Elkin is to be nominated in this manner, the nomination will in all probability prove a most unfortunate one for the Republican party. He will be merely Quay's candidate. And what has Quay done that he should be permitted to furnish a gubernatorial nominee next-year to the Republicans of Pennsylvania? He is responsible for Stone as governor. He is responsible the last legislature, perhaps the the State capital.

He is responsible for the "ripper" bill and all the obloquy and demoralization of government it has brought upon Pittsourg. The people the State are not likely a year hence to give a cordial greeting to any one who can be with the slightest warrant stigmatized as the Quay candidate. A word to. the wise is said to be sufficient, but a whole sermon from the voters of Pennsylvania1 from the-text 'Thou shalt not steal" is occasionally lost upon the leaders of the machine, who neither remember the lesson of the Dclamater campaign nor seem able to profit from more recent experience. HEATED GAS EXPANDS.

When Adam M. Brown was kicked out of office by tho same powers that kicked him in, a sigh of relief went up from the whole public. Thanks were no more devoutly offered up by his enemies than by his friends. Of the two, uffered most'. They had dn't.

Whenever a man riend of Adam M. Brown's he he joy that everybody felt the most savage of rippers to either when JANUARY 4. 1902. most disgraceful that ever assembled at "stand for him." His "enemies," doggedly or tearfully proclaimed was tendered universal sympathy. Jack Ketch, so to speak, was be- was ripped has almost died a-born- him as a private citizen.

It is safe to men ho is assailing. But if one-half ought to be in the penitentiary, and neglected or refused to do it would Brown knows that what he charges in short, for him either to substan Sins Post ses jt, rather than a hich makes the German attitude national law. No one questions the urpose of collecting debts due its sub- been considered good policy to do it. such undertakings, on the ground that keep even her great navy too busy. a Charming Love Storu- Corrlavat 1WU1, CHAPTER XV.

DENIS THE PAGE RIDES IN STATE. who knew that her nami spelt chameleon wondered little at the sad beauty that shone in the face of Caroline of Brunswick. on that August day. when, clad with extreme simplicity, she entered the House of Lords for the first reading of the Bill of Pains and Penalties. That bill was to determine the truth of the testimony, secret and public, brought against her for tha second time since, she came to be the bride of the First Prince of England.

For near upon a quarter of a century she had cried for. Justice, for many years had her- cry come back into her face, and now the combatants were close to each other at last. But it was not in honorable duel that the oppressor dared face the oppressed. The open lists, the combat face to face, Which Heseltine had foretold, was not to be. Hate.Js a thing which slashes Its object from behind the arras, and so the re- gent.

now Fourth of the Georges, htd behind the crackling fleea wnicn oore the indictment of his wifa on the witness of the Green Bag evidence, and the proposal for her degradation from the estate of queen and wife. So, while all the world knew who was her prosecutor, the law acknowledged no plaintiff pro per, and her counselors were are men iivj iiKiii. ttit'ajB ti was pai on irus Ji were red and her eyes bright and stealy. Her dress gave her additional neiBni. aim 5 her additional height, and alone, stopping half-way nson gangwuy to speak to sne wainea aion along the crimson the.

litle lad who ivho smiled up at tier ana Li'tiK riis rti Lir- She seemed scarcely conscious of any- tllLalmrVngfng0 aSnt.msVTf knvoCthr onsaugdhtfenof ana sitppea into a pi Through Heseltine's -contriving. June f- ctVred a seat at ight angles, and watched her mistress fromthe moment inai'in- speaker read out the shameful bill, until at sight of her erstwnne cnamot-1 lam, 1" Milanese Majocchi. in the witness-box. the queen rose to her feet with a low and hftfer irv nf "Traitor." and. apparently afraid that she would break down completely, left the assembly and drove home in a dreadful silence.

On the seventh day, it might be, of the examination of the king vile witnesses, Stephen Heseltine, white with disgust, returned early from Westminster, and found June- ready to accompany some lady about tne princess to the bouse. "You must not go," he said briefly, and took her aside. "Your companion may do as she chooses. She is. by her looks, tough enough for any inferno but you "i do not wish it." she said.

I can serve the Queen as well away." He thanked her gravely, as if for some act of personal service, wnil in the nap-pv secrecy of her closet; she marvelled at herself for this strange submission, jet bv this slight accident, on which neither touched again (though a dozen times tt was on the tip of his tongue to give her his deepest reason), the two came to a fuller knowledge of each other than they had before enjoyed, in spite of the episode at Leghorn, and the many strange and intimate situations into which the unreserve and impulse of their sad mistress threw her friends and servants. Thus, all that which went on at St. Stephens filtered through Heseltine. and June learned from her friend's lips day by day the whole of that lurid battle of counsel and prosecution, and the story of the unsavoury calumnv brought against the First lady of the Realm ort account of her foolish courier, Bergami. On some dava the Queen would stay many hours listening to the pleading and the cross-questioning as if the-victim of it all were a stranger, and now and again would turn with grotesque air of amusement to her 'friends at some new and unexpected distortion of her playful acts like a man who reads- his own signature backwards in a glass.

'At other times sh won Id drive for hours and hours along the quieter roads, scarcely speaking, nevtr smiling, but with a eonluual hunger in her eyes. In the house in St. James's Square, from the scullion to the alderman's grooms (who hung about the kitchens, much in love with the savour of things Royal as their master), the cause possessed every mind, and the tension was that of a beleagued city. As the weeks went on. Heseltine, who did not know that he watched June, so closely that he could detect the variation in her appearance of the curve of the smallest trees, saw tne glow sireiigni--u ine- in her cheeks.

She never met him now hut witn eager parteci ups, as. cum wuu hangs upon the war gazettes. He challenged her upon it. and feared that she cherished unchristian vindtctiveness, at which she feigned to be angry. "Ask voursMf." she retorted, "if the zest of this struggle' did not carry you awav long since.

For if has entered blood, and feeds, yet usv me." "You are a true Celt. Give him anything, a rag white or red, or green. 'it matters not tc fight for, and he will never finish fighting." "It is enough; let us talk of the queen. How does she bear it today?" He told her how the was still in court, and had been put in high good humor by the way in which Mr. Denman, with his inordinate love of classical parallels, had hit the king in the fye by.

likening- his wife to Nero's Ostavia. June learnt too how much the mob had armed, themselves with long poles with green pouches at the end, into one of which. it was thrust through the open window of her each, her majesty, with a twinkle, dropped an Italian coin that she happened to have in her pocket, a piece which her steward had forgotten to take to the 'Change on her arrival. Some timoo TtPKpltine's gazette was brief, when June knew that Mr. Solicitor-General (for the king) had excelled himself in that i I i i 1 1 or the flood of puerile garrulity which poured rrom the man as ic official continues to pour from THE ORIGINATOR OF IT.

Adam We have an order of eviction, and we must leave the Gaiden. Eve I told you so. oat In his present tirades irresponsible demagogery is seen at its worst. Press has no desire to defend the hat he accuses them of is true, they who was able, to convict them ardly deserve -a better fate. If A.

M. true, he ought to prove it. It. is time, i ma and A the mm mom town i r. Ml tiate some of his assertions with evidence, or to withdraw them and get off the stump.

Heated gas expands. "Ma Brown is evidently very, warm, and hisas is getting pretty thin. NATIONAL DEBT-COLLECTING AGENCY. The New York Evening Post calls attention to a phase of Venezuelan matter which is "quite commonly being overlooked Germany's claim is, in part at least, made aip of private claims of Qfman citizens, and of defaulted interest on Venezuelan bonds. It is thussr not wholly a question of infringement of the rights of Germans in or of the failure of the Venezuelan fpyfrnmt tin tQ'is ojitrartg.

with foreigners. It is oT Georae IV. and Quee Uarper it Bros, JZ.V.:"' spoke at last almo; ner. June was sec aeltKhted when i sessed by a righteous rage over thte Practised coolness mi. those who knew him ila Once she went r'n 'a.

of Carlton House nl dubbed by the mob "Nero's Hotel." a VI V. VTL and down ViiTi l. ln of an Ineendla Mhile. he escorted her home his aile luu'r" nngue. and she told at last how that which longed 7Vw i.p 10 mis time, she IMUU--II ii inn lum everv derail nf siranKe interview nt ir" jo naunt a wound or play the insulted martyr.

'I was fool enouigh." she said. kneel, to-kneel." she- lturhut ru yiia ior my xoolls ness. At the quick turning away of her hea when he looked inquiry, he knew withon words the end of her story, and tha wn ph Kaam 1 us i-ittiii inu neart now wenea ud Into. flood which almost swept him away i i uiu lius: i Oil (1. In mni- that tA ..,,,1,4 v.

i wonaer. ana went forward to hei gesrure of deprecation made hir Oool again, for in some way not to he de COol again, for in some wav not to he de Prribed she seemed afraid that he should touch too closely on her twrnonul t. At th same moment she drew hei i-nHir nprvn MR lift la I a a. flr(j begged to be told alt about the dav'i IaS -V with some of the pre. in.

His holy Grace of York has managed his palfrey well." he replied sarcastically, amme sareiy past the pitfall of the divorce clause 01 uc av-u n. vn tin other from entanglement in the net popular odium by a splendid and pompous irminuer 10 i n5 Kins; mat 1 ni marriage union imposes a reciprocal obli- gation on the contracting parties, 'which is as good as to say that-if she has offended, the king is the cause of it. Utit heaven'. I would rather anv day have the coarse gibes of the solicitor on whalebone skirts than his giacB' "Yet a church, even ours Luuivura Mre mic in vneir aim. Lady Interrupted.

"Even ours." she persisted, "which you have condemned as grossly indolent tn its cures, does well to remind its children, whether kings or llnkmen. of this truth. Nor were marriage the sad anA soiled bungle that it is painted by a llocrarth If our reverend men went further mill, and ftreached chastity before marriage more oudly." After the words were uttered, she felt the old shyness that had come upon her in the gallery at Castle Curragh so many years before, but he. glowing to find that her mind was still like the deep, pure tarn he had immagined It, boldly spoke.lnttlng her see ail his thoughts. 80 she sat.

hei- 11 and 3 clasped upon her knees, smiling while he-spoke humbly and earnestly- li the first time, and fears to boast of and of the rich romance of fallure- uvc ana ine iara, 01 trie time inai wnoi phemous should be as damnatory inn li 111 a. iiiiin 11. nun liuvrr. 11111 God made both as pure and sacred at rt 1 .1 1 1 1 1 1 1 ii 1 1 linn au.n I I I I 111 vr I I II a 1111 1 1 1 vi 1 1 1' 1 1 in Hiinrniiiiii.i Anil immii 1 1 miij kii B111 1111.1 1 till l'14K -t-Klt After tbia day, both seemed to have passed through a gate into a garden. There was surely a place beyond which neither apprehended.

But the difference between them was this hs. looking for ward quickly, found once more that perplexing question of on her lips, while he went about nis dairy- woric for the nueen with fresh courage. rejoiced tnat ne eouio nma nis oea them all the while. Thus, she suffei and analysed, and, so to say. curtaiil her mind towards him.

mindful of oueen's half-confession to her. and te ful even in thousht of hurting a creaH so wounded. If she had known how-tig lv he reined himself when, others bv and how he still Questioned her 1 1 V. i Ti.Ma mln-l, I1.11. ILIK lundnin Illlll.

SJI117 llllli 11 I II.I1 herself many a tossing autumn mgr. yet It is naro to mane euner taken is blind alley. 1 Thus the silence that now i.iterruD their talks grew longer. continuous nrizzie eouio not suprwi. the previous night the queen ana advisers had been busy.

"We are making a last stand." rieseuine to june. sne wisnes io heard by counsel." The next day her ma.iesty went to the court. Her secretary returned than usual. June waited lor mm nni rr nil tne nonsenoid Kii-w. Hi vr limtice.

i-ine-wa tenon neseuuief swu aionif tne souHre. aim couiu nv; inwi heaii was bent, as was his -way he. knew that a crisis was at hand. He did; not come to her parlour straight, btiu traversed the vestibule several times. aA if to Beady his mind; when, he entered he S'ioke at first of trivialities, but matched her as she sat.nith her face in spirit.

Shr answered him by a question. t.A II 1 11 lr ll.l -rT-, I 'i i iiiq queen's protest has not yet been named in the house." "Is she composed?" "Utterly. It is marvelous. Terhaps the struggle has wearied her. No wonder Ua In h.IIah.

persecution ann insult. ttA iaaIta1 juiii- v-Kn IUHIK illlll 1 1 1 1 I i I half-ironical, half-sorrowful expres "I "alious?" she MM-' callous? heavens!" and walked impatiently window, as if she hoped he would I i lull 1 SI 1 Lll'. iW KIIR lltl iii i ill IN ami lui n. L.isipn. iiitii-rea iicien.

inometning ns i can near rrif ana a neavy tra Tiok hev come runnlnc thi wav ing tneir i nere is some one middle ox mem. (To Continued Monday.) Things Xot to Sny to Balys M4 Here are some of the things you never Fay to the baby's mother: When wiu it begin to look intelli Goodness: I believe the chiid is taking notice: Do you think of raising It? Do you feel any attachments or tton for it yet? Minneapolis Journa BAD COMPLEXIO RED ROUGH HAND FALLING HAIR PREVESTEO JBf lUtiGHSQ Tho most effective skin purify in jr and beautifying soap is the world, as well purest and sweetest for toilet, bath, sad nuMenr. It strikes at the nana of ha4 complexions, red, rough hands, fallinr I U1CIUL9IIC3, ID CIOglJIM, irritated, inflamed, overworked, or elii-giab Pores. Si4 thrrajrhont tH orKl. Purrc J.

4 in C.Co rropc. Bcctus. SVo J8lr showed its pu wfl kI? ln a dmbneM was le it bv all ni tv- 1 I has existed for years in London, in South American and Oriental on, and me that Germany is to Venezuela. bondholders uch delinquencies iow complaining olleciing agencies, jurisdiction. of enezuela.

All governments but they ordinarily confine their There apperrs to be considerable sus- SMOKE PREVENTION. since. "Now. my dear." said Mr. Longhead.

"I want you to make the acquaintance of all the neighbor women at once." "Why, we're barely settled here." replied his wife. "What's your hurry?" "So that you may tell them our true family history. If you don't they'll be spreading all sorts of stories about us." Philadelphia Press. Mrs. Mahoole Shure, awn th doctor is makin a hog out av Pathrick, Mrs.

O'Toole Awn how so, Mrs. Mahoole? Mahoole Phoy, he forbid him smokin' ixcipt afther meals, awn now Pathrick ates tin meals a day. Chicago News. "Don't you despise people who talk behind your back?" "I should say so. Especially at a concert or during an Interesting play." Philadelphia Bulletin.

"What would you think of female policemen?" "Not much. Let us hope we will never see that kind of club women." Philadelphia Bulletin. "You should love your neighbor as yourself." "Of course; but. there are times' when a fellow. is considerably disgusted with himself." Chicago The Parson What do you suppose will become of you when vou arrow, un if vnu never go to Sunday, school? i The Kid Don't yer worry 'bout me, boss.

I'm going tr be a politician. Life. PEOPLE OF PROMINENCE Mr. Lafcadio Hearn, the who is at present lecturer on English latera-ture in the Imperial University of.Tokio, was educated in America, and for ten years did editorial work in New Orleans. Mis Marie Corelli, lecturing'at Edinburgh on "Imagination," read an extract from a book on tho Egyptian pyramids, published in 1072, which, described the use of wireless telegraphy by one Saurid, a high priest of Memphis.

Gerald Sinclair Hay-ward; the Celebrated miniature painter, formerly of. Lohdon. England, is at present in this country. Among his recent productions; ia a ring upon which is painted 'a human eye revealing a remarkable depth of expression. Ex-Mayor Samuel A.

Green, of Boston, -has given to the Harvard Art Museum some gorgeous articles- of apparel worn by Harvard students of his ancestors upon their graduation in the lKth century. Ir. Green's grandfather graduated in 17S4. Prince Carl, Princess Ingeborg and Prince Eugene of Sweden are soon to visit, the United States. Prince Carl is the second son of King Oscar, Princes3 Ingeborg.

his wife, is the daughter of the crown prince of Denmark and Prince Eugene is King Oscar's youngest son. General George H. Steuart. Conferedate brigadier general, has just had returned to him. by Abram Smith, of Long Beachv a Bible which he carried through the Civil War.

and which the latter took from, a Confederate wagon a few days before tho surrender of Le-e's army. THE CH0PH0USE WAITER. His Characteristic Difference from Other Species ot His (ienm. The typical chophouse waiter goes on duty at 6, and works until 2 or 3 in the morning. His knowledge of human nature is great, his information on the subject of sporting matters is exhaustless, and his emoluments in the way of tips are perhaps larger than those of any other waiter in town; not excluding the most popular who serve at the finer restaurants.

Not that he understands the' art of waiting, with any degree of the skill of the French waiter. He is a creature of moods and of impulses, and it depends on his state of mind whether the mustard be brought immediately or not brought at all. Direct orders grate upon him, and cause him often to lapse into an entire forgetfulness as to the articles required. One has to understand the chophouse waiter to get the best results from him. He is like a rare violin, and must be handled dexterously -in order to produce harmony.

Frequently the chophouse waiter receives not only tips in the way of cash, but information as to Wa.ll. street deals on which he often realizes. Naturallv all this gives him a-n air. Also, as he serves the distinctively gay after-theater crowds, he gets to know the ma gniflcent levels of liff. In no way is he ever servile, as is the Franco-Swiss.

On the contrary, his fault Is to verge on the other extreme of fa-rrlliar confi'lence, to reply to anv criticism with badinage, and to treat the poor in heart with a magnificent and patronizing cordescension. Every popular chophouse waiter cherishes one dream to open a place of his own. where he may amass, the undoubted profits that are to be had in' this business. A very prosperous chophouse proprietor in town and many of the fashionable hotel proprietors and managers were graduated from the ranks of wait-erdom. New York Sun.

i FREIGHT HANDLERS. Another Clans of Railroad Employes Who Are Imposed On. Pittsburg, January 1 1902. jrress: Dear Sir: Your laying bare the hardships of freight train crews was highlv commendable in every particular, and shows the interest you have taken -in righting wrongs from the first issue of The Press. i There is one branch of the freight bust-: ness I would "like to call your I to, hoping you might, by publication, get some redress for the overworked slaves for such they are.

I mean the freight handlers. These men work from 14 to 20 hour at a stretch at the most trying work there is. I have- seen those poor fellows almost fall asleep when given a breathing spell for. a moment, then plug along" again like men in a stupor. When at last they are through and go home, some are not able to stand the strain and totally collapse and do not return; the remaining men take up the added burden almost dead (half dead, half alv-e for the mag- mncent sum of 15 rntf an hour.

W'hether this is justice to freighthouse men, i leave you and th Nic to judge. 1 remain AVFREIGI "and. Baltimore and Chicago stages of anti-smoke crusades. results seem to be encouraging, says really aiming at the Monroe doctrine are all at present in more or less ad- A report from Cleveland, where the that moral suasion, the awakening of I i I .1 1IV. I i -1 1 IV.

QUM I manufacturing establishments every public sentiment, and instruction in the economies possible with smoke-consuming devices, careful firing, the use of smokeless coal, and of mechanical stoking, are still the methods upon which the smoke inspector and his assistants rely. Since the first of July, nevertheless, they are' able to report that fifty mechanical Ptokers and smokeless furnaces have been installed and contracts for about thirty more. The consequent improvement in the case of seven establishments amounted to 9 pr cent on the scale of measurement adopted, i. from 13 to per cent. In six others the fall was from 21 to prr cent.

Tin? railways have lent their aid by appointing special engineers and inspectors to co-operate with the city officials, and by insisting on better firing. As against the 20 to 35 per cent observed last March, the percentages in November have run from to 13 per cent only, and in the case of one road from 6 to 0 per. cent. In general, this is the only practicable way of fighting the smoke evil, as readers of the Pittsburg Press are aware. "In a notable series of articles three or four years ago The Press demonstrated thatsmoko consumption is a 'misnomer, but that smoke prevention, by in- 1 li c.

QtaLin iko nf nmnor hnilrr: i avArrn-hArn -r, A kind of humor whlcn so delights the the liht. I coarse-grained. -On othr days, when her How Ured you hp ssi1( friend would come to her with smiling; chouM be away from all this, and eyes and twitching lips, she guessed that You are a creiture made for ha p-the queen counsel (none other than Mr. i A strange ironical platitude, which men SEEING BY PHONE. Ilr.

Bell Pronounces Frenchman's Claim "a Fairy Tale." Prof. Alexander Graham Bell, the inventor of the telephone, afternoon read with much interest, the World's cable from Paris telling of the alleged discovery by Dr. Sylvestre of a process that enabled him to see by. telephone. After reading the dispatch Trof.

Bell made the following statement, to the World: "The idea of seeing by telephone has attained its majority. It is now 21 years of age. Seeing by telephone or telegraph may be within the range, of the possible. I say that because nothing, is impossible nntil it has been demonstrated so to be. Seeing by either of these instrumentalities, however, is, as I' look upon it, so far removed from the field probability that I should t-eat any report of this character as an absurdity.

"The idea of seeing by telephone is a newspaper product, and Was credited to myself. Twenty-one years ago, early in 1SS0, I made an important invention, based upon my discovery of the possibility of transmitting sound by the agency of a beam of light, utilizing the remarkable property of selenium, whose electrical resistance is varied "by the action of ligTit. This apparatus, which -was subsequently perfected. is known science today as the photophone. "At that time I was not prepared to publish the results I had obtained.

I therefore' filed a secret sealed package in the Smithsonian Institution which detailed the secret I had discovered. It so happened that in those days the public was- willirg to believe anything about electricity or the' telephone. The fact that I had deposited this package got out. and some newspaper wag who knew something of electricity, published a story. "His story was to the effect that Dr.

H. E. Licks, of Bethlehem, had succeeded, by the aid of the telephone, in projecting upon a screen a real live image of a cat. The use of the word Helick is apparent to any scientific man when we recall the term 'Helix. At all events, the papers took it up.

and out of that grew the story of being able to see by telephone. "Two well known English professors both still living Perry and Ayrton. came out in an Indignant communication in which they connected the two paragraphs and. after relating how Prof. Bell, of Washington, had claimed to have discovered this improbable they wanted the scientific world to know that they, before my time, had perfected such an invention.

"Soon after another writer claimed that he made the discovery before either of the English professors had. Then came a new claimant from Australia. "Presently we heard from Mr. Sawyer, a distinguished New Y.rker. now dead, who claimed th.it he had made this great discovery before either of the English professors or or any-one else.

"To cap the climax, the Scientific American took up the subject and discussed seriously a discovery that had no existence. They insisted that it was -an-injustice to one of their clients that he should be robbed of this great honor. "This cable from Paris is the same old story. Tt has occasionally cropped out since 1SS0, usually every four or five years, in one form or another. I must confess that I do not believe Dr.

Sylvestre has -made such a discovery as he has led the Wcrld correspondent to write about. "There is nothing in the story as I read it to indicate tnat it is any more thnn a fairy' tale." Washington Cor. New York World. When He XV mn 21. There is a young- criminal lawyer in this city who, on the.

occasion of his becoming of aje. began the celebration or -his- birthday in a way that caused his household a gTeat deal of consternation. On the eve of the fete, shortly after midnight. the young man's family were suddenly startled from their slumbers by a loud voice in the-house calling, a man in the house! There's a man in the house'" The valiant pater familias'' rushed from his room, bearing In his hands a heavv Mllet of firewood, to learn the cause of the disturbance and to capture the intruder. His son was standing In the hall, shouting at the top of his voice.

"Where's the exclaimed the old gentleman. "Here, sir; nere!" proudly replied the young man. "ThLs is he. At last I'm twenty-one!" Memphis Scimitar. of Bnttoui.

A house built of bottoms la the lmtet thing in architecture, r5 a certain French musical celebrity is building it The walls, the the doors; the exterior and the interior are all ornamented with buttons of everv description, from the very origin of their Invention to those of the present dav. Those dating from the lower Greek empire are of the jpost -eurious. mantif but vcry untrr has been ran- sacked, nd rome very curious specimens are reported to hax-e been brought to light. "Well, it is simply remarkable how things have advanced since my day," said the old sport reflectively. "Take the various kinds of athletics, for instance.

New methods and improvements have been introduced and games and contests are carried out on purely scientific plans. But after all, I don't think the boys get half as much enjoyment out or the sport as they did in my time. Ah. those were the good days," and the veteran chuckled softly. "I was a member of the Pittsburg Barge Club in 1S73 and we had lots of fun.

The KIttanning Barge Club was coming to the front that year and we arranged to row them a match. We went up to Kittanning for the race and when the opposing crews got in the water for a preliminary spurt. I sized up our opponents and noticed they had arms of herculean proportions. A bridge was being built across the. river and I came to the conclusion that the Kittanning bovs were afrnid of us and had tilled their places with a gang of lusty bridge builders.

I always stuck to that opinion, but others claimed that the race was on the square. "We decided to row the race, anyhow, as an immense crowd had turned out to witness it. Boat racing was in the zenith of its popularity in those days and I am sorry to say that it has comparatively died out. The course was a straight one and at its end the Kittanning enthusiasts had gathered to welcome the home club as they had no doubt but what they would win and they were willing to stake thir last dollar on the result. "Well, we hadn't gone more than a few hundred yards when the Kittanning crew broke an oar.

They raised an awful howl and wanted us to go back until they got a new oar. We weren't going to take any chances and we rowed over the course and won the race. When we crossed the line alone and our opponents not in sight the local crowd was sore, but when the Kittanning boys came paddling in with an oar shy and they found out that we wouldn't row the rare over again there were stirring times. There was going to be a sociable lynching and all that sort of tiling, but we managed to escape unhurt. "They talk about baseball today, why the.re's nothing to it compared with the game in my time.

Vou young fellows go over to Exposition park and think it a treat to 1.8 men pljy nine innings and oniy make one or two runs. You call that great ball playing. 1 wouldn't walk across HUNTING UP ANCESTORS. Dfsire to Provf Eligibility an Daoghtrrs of Revolution. The ancestor hunter is the bane of the librarian's existence in Syracuse, as elsewhere.

The ancestor hunter is generally feminine. She usually wants to be a Daughter of the Revolution or a Colonial Dame. The craze for ancestors starte-I with the formation of those societies, and it grows rather than decreases. To qualify the candidates must find an ancestor, and the libraries are their hunting grounds. To many a library is apparently a place of mystery; the visitors begin their search by, plying the attendants with questions.

All that the person in charge, can do is to discover the State in which their ancestors were supposed to have lived, and to turn over its documents for the inspection of the anxious descendants. With some this suffices, but the majority demand assistance in the more minute quest after names, dates and places. Often the ancestor is all right, and shows himself after a time; more often he can't be-found. The most searching investigation fails to bring even a 1TT5 private or drummer boy to the light of day. In such cases the chances are that my lady becomes angry and declares that the book has got it all wrong.

In fact, the library and everything connected with It, Including the attendants, are hopelessly wrong, and she says she must consult reliable authorities. Then, too, there are times when the ancestor turns up, but his interest in the revolution was that of a Tory. Then is the time to draw a veil over the emotions of the disappointed aspirant for patriotic social honors. "Why doesn't some enterprising woman take to the hunting up of genealogies as a business? There is a good field for such a worker right here in Syracuse, asked a library attendant recently. "One woman In Washington makes a fair income by this means, ar.d the library attendants of the city would rise up and call ber blessed!" Syracuse Herald.

WHAT DID YOU GET! Did Santa Clavs Put Money tn loir StBcLlngf If he did. and you are wise, you'll put rwirt of it wiere it will earn more money for yoti every day In the year in the Mercantile Trnst for Instance, where eavines rn 4 cent interest. 413-413 Wood street is the location. 1231 hj'r the street to see a contest like that. In my day it was different.

I remember the Kittanning ball club tame down to Pittsburg one time and played a game with the.X'nioii League team. The crowd from up the river with bats that looked like telegraph poles and a determination to put the Union League boys out of the business, came here to play us. "The game started shortly after noon and talk about your scenes. You young fellows will never see the like of it. We didn't use masks and couple of umpires like they do today, but we played ball -all right.

There was lio nine inning game that clay, hut we were at it until it -got dark. We quit at the end of the fourth inning and the score was 1W to i in favor of 'he Union League team. That was the way they played ball in the old days." And the old sport fell in a reverie, and dreamed of the sport of his youth. This little scene took place in the rear room of a downtown saloon on New Years eve. Four young men were sitting round a table drinking brandy and soda and other drinks over which young men make good resolutions at the end of the year.

Presently a newsboy came in and tried to sell some papers. As he was about to depart he noticed something over the right eye of one of the men and -approaching him said, politely: "Excuse me, mister, but there's something over your eye: just thought I'd tell you so you could brush off." "Thank you. my boy. thank you," said the man. 'I know, I know.

You see I rather like it; fact is, I believe I'll-leave it there for a few days, perhaps longer. Obliged to you all the same, lad. Here's a quarter, run along, now, run along." The newsboy had the best Intentions in the world, but the fact of the was, the mark on the man's face was the result of coming in contact with a brick thrown by some unknown person during a scrimmage in which were engaged half a dozen enthusiastic citizens. Friends of the man who had received the tender memento of the event claimed that it was caused by coming in contact with a swinging door. The owner of the decoration, however, vowed with great solemnity that the work was done with a brick and being a man of intelligence it is naturally to be supposed that lie knows under any circumstances, no matter how adverse, the difference between a brick and swinging door.

Any sane man who has come through the trying ordeal of colliding with a brick certainly ought to Kut what's the use of arguing about it? The Man About Town. WHITE HOUSE LIVERY. How the President's oachinn ind Pootmnn Are Apparrlrd. A cockade of red, white and blue is a noticeable feature of the new White House livery, although the national colors are in evidence throughout the costume in which tho President's coachman and footman appeared a few weeks ago. The coats and the trousers are of heavy dark blue vicuna, the best quality of goods obtainable being used.

The outer seams of the trousers arc bound with a white cord The long paddock driving coat, which terminates midway between, knee and ankle, is of "military" cut. and has a snug waist and broad square shoulders. The skirt has a decided flare. Down the front, from the tight-fitting, naprow to the waist line, run parallel lines of silver buttons. Underneath the coat is worn a long sleeved tunic of same material as the other and fastened in front by a single row of silver buttons.

Mrs. Roosevelt selected the material and the pattern for the livery. The order was given to a lashionable New York livery tailor. American Tailor and Cutter. AN APPROPRIATE HYMN.

But It Coalrt Hardly Have Pleased the Youthful Sermonize r. A Milwaukee divine tells this story on himself: In a celebrated Eastern theological seminary it is, or was, the practice of the faculty to require the students to take turns in delivering sermons a custom, by the way, to which, as a rule, the young aspirants for ecclesiastical honors did not take kindly. A moos those who attended the school wu young man. who now occupies the pulpit of a well-known Methodist Church on the East Side, who, however, -formed an exception to the rule above- mentioned. In the course of time it came his turn to speak.

He prepared his discourse with great care, and when Sunday arrived he acquitted himself handsomely, every on? present listening to his words with marked attention. At the conciusion of his remarks one cf the professors mounted the rostrum and announced the hymn: "Hallelujah, 'tis done Milwaukee Sentinel. city government of Pittsburg has given opportunity to mstai these remedies. THE IRE OF KIPLING. Ire I-s Uttered," is the headline over a cablegram from London, published this morning, presenting extracts from some verses penned by Mr.

Kipling on the Boer war. "He Declares In roetry," continues the head-liner. "That Compulsory Military Service-Will Alone Save England." After an attentive reading of the verses, we are free to admit that this is probably what Mr. Kipling declares. Wc would not undertake to assert tiat he meant anything else.

There are a good many "ye's" and "ere's" and tji's lee's" and "harry's" and other Kiplmgesoue expressions in the stanzas. and tbey roll along with an undeniable measure. It all evidently says something, and wt- suppose it is realiy poetry. But is Mr. Kipling reaJly "mad?" Is it a fact that his "ire is uttered?" We have hcird.

of the noble Indignation of bards before, but how indignant is a man who can sit down and mould his indignation into meters and rhymes? Mark Twain's idea of wrath is somewhat different. "When you are mad." he pays somewhere, "count ten. When you are madder, count twenty. When 2'ou ara real mad swear." The rule, according to the admirers of Mr. Kipling's 'Jsjiilv calculated passion, would be: "When you are mad, count land bv the quft! counsel in case ijer testimony should be needed) sniffed at riflnni -i -Vi a rmtn ir nlAlpmfint.

based on "the authority of our "greatest dramatic author," that the country of the Caesars was the home of all x-illainy. -And many clean and loyal fellows held their sides over his cannonade against the spies, in-: 1 1 1 -1. l.l htd quoting from the words ot l'ognerry the fianiiiA acroinct Vi i lipf.impn Hero lady; -they have verified unjust things: in i nil ana. to conciuoe. tney are lying a dictum the more applicable in the pres- ent issue, as he reminded his vast a u- dience.

since it was taken from the last of a comedy called "Much About Nothing." On the dav (it was the fortv-sixth of th tril that Ivord Krpkine. oleading witn heart ana soui against me bcoti'i reading -or tne pi uKranauin Hni rivorce. and exhat'Fted hy the strain of this battle of many weeks, fell forward in the rr.tdle of his address in a swoon, the queen returned from the grat court with tears in her eyes for the first time In that terrible tme. Heseltine told June that when Lord E'don and th r-' carried their colleague into the fresh air. the queen begged that he might herself, in the waitinfr-roorn set sp'rt for her, tend his lordhir MP a phvsirian came.

"'If vou had dear, clever Mr. Brougham." she said, rougishly, even through her agitaton. "no one wou'd have believed in it. because you are such a master of fine fee'inc-s." Yet a1! -this debate and contest seemed as'nothine when t'l Iondon u-wn the lips of the Chairman of the Committee of Inouirv as he rad the di-orce clause cf the bas Evn here, comedy rame to-confound tragedy, when Lord King got upon his legs to regret that evil reports of a nature that the m-osecu-tion could not establ'sh, had given i shameful bla to th'- course of the trial-He therefore begged their lordships to re-rrember that it was said that there were other personr. besides th courier Par-garoi.

with whom the name of an illustrious lady had been coupled. He wou'd remind tem that her majesty had surely bcfti guilty of indecorum at Blackheath with Ijord Liverpool, and that she had played at blind man's buff with the chancellor of the exchequer. "I cannot. I. assure your lordships, report the exact time when thse extraordinary and Indecent proceeding! took place, said Lord King, as demurely as any maid: "bit it must have been.

I think, when the noh'e earl was out of place, and looking for means to get Into office. -wfore the Regency." At which Prosperity Jack, nuroie in the face, hut laughing in spite of himself, growled out. "Never, upon my honor:" to whom Lord King bowed extravagantly, and replied that "This, thn. a an instance to the noble earl of the falsity xtf reports. So the dial uporA the Queen's house in js why the world has, vtical times I NTS- -JT- -V all about the VTreelman, kpver.

vet Xover. -Jr poets Xseriously, thev eats on him. ism. ile 1 his ioo, the Jiack-VstilL V' -a i.