St. Louis Post-Dispatch from St. Louis, Missouri • Page 102

I FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 27, 1987 ST. LOUIS POST-DISPATCH 3G BILL McCLELLAN REVIEWS FILM 5 "HOPE AND GLORY" Hats Top The List Of 'Statement' Gifts I 9 1 NOW THAT Thanksgiving is behind us, it's time to think about -a Christmas gift for the man in your II i life. No shirts, please. Shirts are the last thing a man needs. Most men think of their shirts the way Whitey Herzog thinks of his pitching staff.

That is, you want about 10 of them. Four or five of them should be starters. A starter is a shirt a man 'can wear to work. A five-shirt rata ls tion is obviously the best, as there are live worn days a ween, ray attention to the men you know, and you'll discover that men wear the 4 is-- same nve smns weex in ana ween out So unless the man in your life wears the same shirt Friday that he wore on Monday, your present will be destined to languish in the closet. The other five shirts in a man's wardrobe will be relievers.

I'm talking about T-shirts or flannel shirts that a man can wear when work is done. Typically, a man will have four T-shirts and one flannel shirt. York yuppies who live a pretty wild and swinging life until they end up with a baby on their doorstep. There are a few frantic, sappy scenes as they learn to feed and diaper the cute little food processor and then they settle in to increasingly less-reluctant parenthood. When it looks as if they are going lose the baby, the three turn to mush.

Tom Selleck is good at turning to mush. Guttenberg and Danson are less convincing, but the three do some nice harmonizing as they sing baby Mary to sleep with "Goodnight Sweetheart." Nimoy takes a real chance with audience sensibilities when he has Danson, sad because Mary has been taken out of his life, take a few drinks and tuck a pillow up under his sweater, as if in pregnancy envy. The scene is kind of cute, but it certainly teeters on the edge of dumbness. In fact most of this movie teeters on the edge of dumbness. But because of the fetching baby (actually played by twin infant girls) and Selleck, who is pretty fetching himself and not a bad comic actor, audiences will probably forgive it a lot.

(At the Clarkson, Creve Coeur, Halls Ferry, Kenrick, Ronnie's, St. Charles.) "PLANES, TRAINS AND Rating: language. Running time: 1:30. By Harper Barnes Of the Post-Dispatch Staff PLANES, Trains and Automobiles" is that old American standby, the road, rail and flight-pattern comedy. As recent variations of an age-old movie genre go, it is fairly good, but somehow you hope for more from Steve Martin and John Candy.

Martin is an uptight marketing executive and Candy a talkative on-the-road salesman. They are thrown together just before Thanksgiving on a flight from New York to Chicago. The usual holiday blizzard closes O'Hare, and the flight is rerouted to Wichita. From there, Candy and Martin make their way to Chicago by way of Jefferson City, St. Louis (which they enter from the west across Eads Bridge) and the fields of Illinois.

Transportation includes the devices mentioned in the title was well as a bus and a couple of trucks. Director John Hughes in Pink," "Ferris Bueller's Day Off) generally succeeds in abandoning one form of transportation for, the next before things get too predictable, although there are a few slow stretches, particularly early on. This comedy might have been hilarious as opposed to amusing if Hughes had taken a few more chances with his comedy, and perhaps let; the very talented Candy cut loose a little more, itill, his speciality is taking stock characters and inak-ing them seem likable and even he generally succeeds in doing that again -this time around. JM There are a few very funny scenes, including one at Lambert Field that includes 95 percent of the naughty language that is responsible for the rating, and that just would not be the same if Steve Martin had been saying "heck." (At the Chesterfield, Des Peres, Halls Ferry, Kenrick, Northwest Square, Ronnie's, St. Charles, Village.) Another movie review on Page 4 1 Rating: PG-13.

Running time: 1:53. By Joe Pollack Of the Post-Dispatch Staff WAR may be hell if you're Gen. William Tecumseh Sherman, or those against whom he waged it, but war is great fun if you're a 9-year-old boy with a gang of friends, an imagination, blocks of ruined buildings to explore, warm shrapnel to discover, sex to learn about and a general air of excitement tinged with fear enveloping your entire world. "Hope and Glory," is a movie about war from that particular perspective, and it's a glorious experience. John Boorman, remembering his own boyhood, has written and directed a flawless piece of reminiscence, filled with wonderful characters of all ages and a marvelous eye and ear for the childhood experience.

It's an odd change of pace for Boorman, whose earlier films "Emerald Forest" all had a touch of the mystical and the fantastic. This one is straight with all its charm and warmth coming from its characters and their slightly skewed view of life. Sebastian Rice-Edwards is the young boy, through whose eyes we see the story develop, and Geraldine Muir is his younger sister. Both are making their film debuts, and both are absolutely delightful. And then there's Ian Bannen, as their crotchety grandfather, a man I immediately vowed to emulate in word and deed.

Bannen gets drunk every Christmas, calls for a toast and then goes into a litany to every woman he ever knew. "Love them," he says, "but don't try to understand them." He mistrusts electricity curse you, volt watt and and he describes his four daughters Grace, Hope, Faith and Charity as being named by their mother after "the virtues I lack." We see the outbreak of World War II while the two small children, their teen-aged sister (Sammi Davis) and their parents (David Hayman and Sarah Miles) listen to the radio and wonder what it all means. Hayman joins the Army, Miles decides to evacuate the children to Australia, then changes her mind and then the bombing starts. The little boys, like so many savages of the Flies" came immediately to mind), invade the bombed-qut houses, looting and destroying with wild-eyed glee. These are not street ruffians, but suburban London children with manners and a middle-class environment, complete with shorts and knee socks.

And yet, when a bomb strikes, it seems as if the wraps come off. They have been given some sort of adult permission to finish the job that the adults began. They're still little boys, however, testing one another in terms of ability to use bad language, leering at adolescent girls, boasting of knowledge and achievements that are far in their futures. When a house is bombed and a woman killed, they scurry around to tell one another that Pauline's mother is dead and, when faced with disbelief, say, "Go ask her yourself. She's right there." Davis, a true teen-ager, becomes involved with a Canadian soldier.

Their bedroom tumblings bring one of the funniest lines of the film as the two little children observe through a knothole and Geraldine Muir offers a critical appraisal of the act. Davis and Miles battle through this period, but there is love as well as anger, and it works nicely. present. Don't wear while driving. So what about styles? If you want to go the informal-route, obviously you want a baseball-style cap.

My personal suggestion is a $4.95 cap from White Castle. It's blue and white and has blue lettering saying "White Castle" on the front. It makes a clear statement: "Yes, I'm a man of the '80s, and I'm often rushed. But even when I'm in a hurry, I demand quality." The bad news is that White Castle no longer sells these hats. I called headquarters last week and was told the hats had been discontinued.

Of course, that only makes them more valuable. I checked the Goodwill store on Forest Park, and while the store had several fine caps prices began at 50 cents no White Castle hats were on display. What the heck. That is why newspapers like this one have classified ad sections. Put an ad in the paper.

Someone might be willing to sell. If you're wont to get something fancier than a cap, something a bit more personal, think about the fedora-style hat. A fedora can transform a man. A shy, retiring man will suddenly feel like a rake. A sober, serious-minded man will feel like a gangster.

In the vernacular of the street, it will put a glide in your stride, it will take your strut out of the rut At the Goodwill, the selection was limited, but prices began at a reasonable 75 cents. If you want your gift to make a bold statement to the man in your life, consider a cowboy hat. Talk about transforming a guy! Give a man a cowboy hat for Christmas, and by the new year, he'll have an entire new identity. He'll probably pick up a nickname something manly, like "Buck," or perhaps something in the double-name style, like "Billy Joe," or "Stevie Ken." In other words, if you want to change your man, buy him a cowboy hat. Another possibility is a stocking cap.

What a fine statement a man makes when he wears a stocking cap: "I'm a functional, pragmatic guy who wants to stay warm and I don't care I flat don't care what my hair looks like." Of course, if you give a man a stocking cap, you are saying, "I don't care what your hair looks like." And that's a nice thing for a woman to say to a man. Each of these shirts, like relief pitchers, can be used several days in a row, and there will usually be one or two that hardly ever get called on. But you get the point. Very few men need new shirts. So let's think accessories.

Hats, in particular, make wonderful presents. Most men secretly long to wear a hat, but few are bold enough to go out and buy one. But if someone gives him a hat, he will have an excuse to wear one. A good hat makes a statement. The most common statement is, "This is a gift, so don't laugh." Before we discuss the advantages of the various styles, there is something I should mention.

If you're giving a hat to a man who doesn't normally wear one, you should emphasize that bats are not to be worn while driving. That's because hats make a state-. ment to police officers. The statement is, "I'm a hat, and my owner Sebastian Rice-Edwards and Geraldine Muir play siblings who grow up in the excitement of World War II in "Hope and Glory." When the family's home catches fire (ironically, it is not bombed), they move to grandfather's house in the country, and the mood changes sharply. War is practically forgotten (except for Davis) and there's a slight sit-com feel, but Bannen and Rice-Edwards play a marvelous cricket game, and Rice-Edwards learns to punt, to canoe and to fish.

Boorman has created a film that will strike a responsive chord through all ages. It's warm, and fresh, with a different and totally effective point of view. (At the Hi-Pointe.) "THREE MEN AND A BABY" Rating: PG. Running time: 1 :40 By Harper Barnes Of the Post-Dispatch Staff ONCE IT GETS most of the heavy-handed poo-poo jokes out of the way in the first half-hour, "Three Men and a Baby" turns into a lightweight, sentimental, somtimes amusing little comedy. "Three Men and a Baby" is a remake of the French farce, "Three Men and a Cradle," which was a big hit in France.

Director Leonard Nimoy and the screen writers have taken the basic highly unlikely plot line, made substantial changes in a subplot about drug dealers to make it "nicer" for American audiences, and enlisted the comic talents of Steve Guttenberg, Ted Danson and, most notably, Tom Selleck. Guttenberg, Danson and Selleck play New Jas either been drinking, or has illegal drugs in the car." This is true. Ask a cop. He or she will tell you that roughnecks and dandies wear hats. Some cops routinely pull over any man wearing a hat.

-r In fact, a hat is considered ''probable cause," as they say at the station. Well, so much for that. You simply put a little note in with your ELLEN GOODMAN Get Everyone Involved In Airline Performance Traditional Portland-Willamette GLASSFYRE the ultimate in fireplace fashion Fireproof hearth RUGS protect your floor beautifully! INGENIOUS TRAY LIGHTER Makes starting your fire a breeze nil iFilnXn LIT 7 4 OUR BEST GRATE Guaranteed for 5 years! 'Ml HI am AS A FREQUENT flying critic who's watched the deteriorating performance of the airlines from a non-smoking aisle seat I was among those who called for an accounting. At the very least, disgruntled travelers deserved some information. At the very least the airlines deserved some humiliation.

Then the Department of Transportation parachuted into the act It issued its first monthly report, an 800-page book of computer printouts, marking the airlines for tarmac tardiness, bungled baggage and bumped bodies. They put the worst culprits into I the spotlight Air got the booby prize for lateness and Northwest for baggage mishandling. Presidential Airlines was the biggest bumper of the crop. As for airports, laid-back San Francisco came in last Like most travelers, I felt vindicated by the monthly report card. But the flush of victory didn't last any longer than a low-cost fare.

Now that we are deep into the peak holiday travel schedule, I must ad- mit that this knowledge hasn't set me free, at least not of anxiety. DOT never did ask airlines to list how often they were late due to mechanical problems. They were afraid that an airline might respond by letting the planes go up with a few widgets out of whack rather than hurt their rating. Not a comforting thought Moreover, a national comparison-shopping list isn't all that helpful if there's only one store in town. In theory, the airlines are competitive, but not always in practice.

According to the DOT chart, your best shot fbr an on-time trip is to take American Airlines from Char-', lotte, N.C to Dallas, Texas. But this isn't helpful if you live in Des Moines and want to go home to Se- attle for Christmas. Nor is it practical to adopt another set of parents. My own airport, Boston's Logan, is among the half-dozen worst in the country. As a savvy consumer searching for a better landing, I should fly into Salt Lake City.

But it would be a bit of a drive home. I The DOT report has let the con-Jsumer beware. But we're already wary, weary and worried. We need the airline companies to keep us company in our high anxiety. Needless to say, I have a plan.

The only workers at the front-t lines of the air battle today are pilots, flight attendants and gate agents. We have to get mechanics, air-traffic controllers, baggage handlers and executives aloft and involved. We could begin with the mechanics. Everyone who flies says a prayer for the health and welfare of the mechanic: May your days be sunny and your attention be focused. But why leave our friendly mechanics behind? During World War II, I am told, the people who packed parachutes were occasionally asked to take a test drop with their own products.

This possibility hung over their heads, so to speak, adding that little edge of sensitivity to their work. What if airplane mechanics knew that they could be randomly selected not to say hijacked for a hop on a plane they worked on? Might this not focus the mind wonderfully? Now air-traffic controllers. I know they are under enough stress. Why not send them for a nice relaxing trip over Chicago during peak hours? They could pass the time by reading the identifying letters on the planes surrounding them. They could feel what it's like to be a mere blip on a radar screen.

I don't want to be cruel about this hands-on program. If mid-level executives don't want to fly, that's OK. They can have an alternative sentence spent explaining the ticket-price system to passengers: "Congratulations! You a're blue-eyed, 26 years old and flying on an odd-lettered day to see a sick rela-tive! You get a 35 percent discount!" At all times, a special role should be reserved for airline CEOs. As troubleshooter, he should be brought to the gate one Friday night a year to deal with the cancellation of a jumbo jet Remember, no drugs allowed for this activity. I have suggestions for handling baggage-handlers as well.

Each month, they should be required to check in their grandmother's china or their firstborn child, whichever they prefer. What if the DOT hierarchy resists this sensible plan, which is far more useful than a wimpy monthly report? We can reserve the right to ticket their paychecks on a 20-stop flight plan through the air-travel system, until they give up. Not to worry, guys. Everything is under con troL Air control. in WWRM AIR 5 HEAT 'N GLO Heat circulating grate-makes your fireplace a furnace! TOOL SETS OF COURSE! St.

Louis' largest selection. GAS LOGS All the beauty with none of the fuss. ruin 993-5570 Open Sunday 825 South Lindbergh at Conway Rd. mm 0 DIAL 1-800-231-1991 Toll-Free From Anywhere in the U.S. to subscribe to the Post-Dispatch.

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