The Palm Beach Post from West Palm Beach, Florida on November 24, 1968 · Page 158
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The Palm Beach Post from West Palm Beach, Florida · Page 158

West Palm Beach, Florida
Issue Date:
Sunday, November 24, 1968
Page 158
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my favorite JOKES to !M Mate ( vl f V V " ' " ' r DOU " think we're supposed to whistle.' i to laii EDITOR'S NOTE: Sheila MacRae, jackie Gleason's Alice Kramden seen rcguftiry by millions of TV fans, s a gal of (run taens. Sie has been featured at top nightclubs throughout the U.S. and is in constant demand on such TV shows as Ed Sullivan, Dean Martin, lohnny Carson, joey Bishop, Mike Douglas, and Merv Griffin. Sheila's big love is the legit stage and whenever her busy schedule allows, she lakes a role in a touring show. Guys & Dolls, Luv, The Bells Are Ringing, Separate Tables, and Born Yesterday are just a lew that Sheila starred in. This past summer she toured in The Great Sebastians with Van lohnson. David Merrick wants Sheila lor the national and European tour of I Do, I Do, at the conclusion of her TV chores this season. Sheila lives in Miami Beach with her husband, Ronald Wayne, the producer of The Jackie Gleason Show. 5hei7a enjoys a quip or a joke, and here arc some of her favorites: A bachelor is a fellow with views. A small town is a place where everyone knows whose check is good and whose husband isn't. Ask any woman her age, and nine times out of ten she'll guess wrong. V. SMIKVANIAN They now have "Hippies Anonymous." If a hippie feels that his compulsion to take a bath is too great, he calls H.A. headquarters. They send a man who turns off the water. " your hand hurts, think how my turtle must leel!" In a manufacturing plant, the management offered a $25 cash award to employees who offered acceptable suggestions about how the company could save money. One of the first awards paid was to a man who suggested that in the future the economy award should be cut to $10. An exasperated mother to child at the dinner table: "Eat it, dear, pretend it's mud." E. UPl'tR "Try not to make waves, Admiral." A person who can smile when things go wrong has probably just thought of someone he can blame. A group of nuclear physicists attended a conference in Las Vegas, but one of them spent all his time at the roulette tables. "Von Kemp worries me," said a colleague. "He's gambling away as if there'd never be a tomorrow." "Good heavens," gasped another scientist, "maybe he knows something we don't." My biggest problem is deciding what to send to a sick florist friend. You know your children are growing up when your daughter starts putting on lipstick and your son starts wiping it off. Things could be worse. Suppose your errors were counted and published every day like those of a baseball player? Health authorities say that common colds attack more lower income families than those in the middle or higher income brackets. Another way to avoid colds, therefore, would be to ask your boss for a raise. Gals won't have hourglass figures if they keep asking for seconds. As our metropolitan areas get bigger and closer together, we won't even know which city gels credit for the traffic jam. The trouble with towns where you can park as long as you want to, you don't want to. Ci. DOll " have all my letters home for money wrille;i tor the whole semester." 27

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