The Palm Beach Post from West Palm Beach, Florida on December 5, 1997 · Page 70
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December 5, 1997

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The Palm Beach Post from West Palm Beach, Florida · Page 70

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West Palm Beach, Florida
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Friday, December 5, 1997
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Page 70
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w S C THE PALM BEACH POST FRIDAY, DECEMBER 5, 1997 3F TODAY B Christmas In the Village, 5-10 p.m. today through Sunday, Yesteryear Village in South Florida Fairgrounds, 9067 Southern Blvd., West Palm Beach. Lights, decorated homes, strolling minstrels and miniature train. Tickets $2 adults, children under 6 free. Call 793-0333. Even trustworthy teen shouldn't be home alone Question: My wife has a weekend business trip coming up, and I'd like to go with her. Our 16-year-old son feels he should be allowed to stay home alone. He's very trustworthy, and we believe him when he promises not to have a party while we're not there to supervise. But we're still uneasy. Should we let him? Answer: We don't advise it not because your son is likely to break his promise, but because you'd be putting him in a vulnerable position. High school kids . have well-honed antennae, always alert for a house where no parents are present. And word spreads fast. ( Cultivate peace, capture happiness B Fifth Annual Cowboy Ball, 7:30 p.m.-midnight, Old School Square in Delray Beach. Tickets: $50 advance; $60 at the door. Features live music, barbecue dinner and auctions. Benefits the George "Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life," the old song said. And it works. Surrender to and emulation of Jesus, reliance on inner wisdom, taking life as it comes and making the best of it, avoiding the pull of negative feelings, seeing the good, being kind and simple and true, these are ways to "get there." scenario, based on other Forking PARENTS HELPLINE parents' experiences: ! Your son invites one buddy to watch a video. Several more friends arrive Uninvited, and your son is reluctant to send them on their wav. Then more kids Peace and happiness, not such complicated goals, really, but elusive. We have obstacles. Lots of obstacles. Most obstacles are old thought patterns little excuse to smile, to wonder and appreciate. It requires being free to respond, without burdensome emotional baggage that hurts, hassles and haunts. When happiness goes away we must let it. Then we are free to have it again. Maybe in five minutes if we're lucky. Happiness is there. It's our capacity to enjoy that must be redeveloped. Peace can be cultivated. You can nourish peace like a garden. It doesn't depend on any transient event or stimulation. It is a state you can attain, with effort and intention. As with the more fleeting happiness, peace is gained through removing obstacles, old thought patterns that keep us mired in fear, anger and craving. Happiness penetrates and delights. Peace surrounds and supports. But obstacles often prevail. Peace and happiness both depend on our learning to expand the space between the obstacles and living in it. Next week, be here and learn how. B Dr. Hugh R. Leavell is a marriage and family therapist with offices in Jupiter and West Palm Beach. Visit him at httpill www.spectacular.comoneminutetherapist or call him at 471-0067. dx I l that mtenere witn I learning. If not for them we wouia get tne lessons of life quicker and spend less energy and time chasing our tails One-Minute Therapist Dr. Hugh Leavell and repeating errors. It might help if we try to understand the nature of peace and happiness. They're not the same. And you can have one without the other. Happiness goes and comes unbidden. To have it you must take it, embracing any Snow Scholarship Fund. Call 994-1021. B 11th annual All That Glitters gala auction and dinner, 6:30 p.m., Palm Beach Gardens Marriott. Call 686-8081, Ext. 16. B Old-time street celebration, 7-10 p.m. on East Palmetto Park Road in Boca Raton. Music, horse and buggy rides, vintage cars and more. Free. Call 393-7806. B Bonfire on the Beach, 7-9 p.m., Lake Worth Municipal Beach, off Lake Avenue. Food available. Call 533-7362 Ext. 103. B Fourth Annual Fashion Show, 6 p.m. at Omni Middle School, 5775 Jog Road, Boca Raton. Staff and students will model the latest fashions from area stores. Also magic show. Tickets $10 adults, $5 children. Call Laura Hewitt at (561) 883-0068. B Glades artist Sandra Eaves Holder's work will be on display at First National Bank of Palm Beach, 255 South County Road, Palm Beach. The work can be viewed from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. Monday through Friday, through Dec. 17. Call 820-1002. COMING SATURDAY B Kaleidoscope '97, a celebration of many cultures, features International Tree Lighting, 6 to 9 p.m. Saturday, Centennial Square, Clematis and Narcissus streets in downtown West Palm Beach. Also, International Concert, 4 to 8 p.m. Sunday at Meyer Amphitheater, Flagler Drive and Datura Street. Both events feature multicultural entertainment Free. Call 659-8007 for information on these and other Kaleidoscope events. B Holiday Boat Parade of the Palm Beaches, 6:30 p.m. from Peanut Island to Jonathan's Landing along the Intracoastal. Sponsored by the Marine Industries Association of Palm Beach County. Call 624-9092. B Celebrating Black Doll Art, a collectible show and sale, 11 a.m.-7 p.m., Omni Hotel, 1601 Belvedere Road, West Palm Beach. Features doll-making classes and a vintage black doll exhibit. Cost: $2 adults; free for children. Call 863-1252. B Bus tour of Everglades, '011 day Saturday, sponsored by Friends of the Mounts Botanical Garden, 531 N. Military Trail, West Palm Beach. Call 233-1749 for reservations and ticket information. B Holiday Blood Drive, noon-6 p.m. Saturday, Sunday, Dec. 13, 14, 20, 21, 27-31 and Jan. 1-2, The. Gardens mall, 3101 PGA Blvd., Palm Beach Gardens. Blood donations often decrease during holidays, but demand often rises. The South Florida Blood Bank urges donors to "give the gift of life." Donors will receive free T-shirts. Call 845-2323. Let child set pace of toilet training show up, some toting beer. Before he knows it, your;, son is hosting a large, noisy, out-of-control bash. , Any time teenagers crash an unchaperoned party, alcohol consumption is likely and marijuana or other drugs may be used. Alcohol lowers inhibitions and increases the chances that some kids will engage in , sexual activity. Over-exuberant partygoers could damage your house. A teen driver could get drunk at the party, then cause a car wreck. .... Even if your son resists peer pressure to join in, he can't control the crashers. And he knows, if he tries, he can become a social outcast. You open yourself to legal liability, too. Laws vary from state to state, but parents can be held responsible for damages or illegal activity resulting from parties in their houses such as a drunken-driving incident. . You also need to consider whether your son is ready to take total responsibility for your house, even without the added difficulties of an unplanned party. He would have to be extra alert about locking doors and not leaving the stove on, for example. Is he ready to cope with a malfunctioning furnace or a power outage? In order to join your wife's trip, arrange adult supervision of your son and your home. You might ask an adult friend to stay in your house. If your son feels that's too much like having a baby sitter, arrange for him to stay at the home of a friend, i If your son stays with friends, tell your neighbors that you'll be gone and ask them to keep an eye on the house. Give neighbors and your son's host family a -phone number where you can be reached. Leave a key with a neighbor who will check on the house and take in the mail and newspapers each day that you're gone. , You might let your son be home briefly during the day, with the understanding that he is not to have ; friends in. He may complain that these precautions indicate , that you don't trust him, but you should stand firm. Part of being a teenager is testing limits and taking risks. ; Part of being a parent is shielding kids from the - temptations having an empty house can provide. J Susan Crites Price and Tom Price are authors of The Working Parents Help Book (Peterson's, 1996). They . welcome questions and comments addressed to Parents, Cox News Service, 2000 Pennsylvania Ave. N.W., Washington, DC 20006, or e-mailed to parentscoxnews.com. Parents often ask me about the best age to start toilet training. Instead of recommending a certain age, I advise them to wait until the child has shown that he is ready and wants to begin. Some signs include: B The child is over the initial excitement of walking and is ready to sit down. B The child begins Problems in toilet training nearly always arise because it is started too soon. When parents are unable to wait, and they impose t toilet training as their idea, the child will feel this as an invasion. Unfortunately, pressure on parents comes from many sources. Their own wish to see him as advanced makes them want to compete with other families. Preschools often insist that a child be "trained." Other parents offer advice and condescending comfort. Grandparents imply that toilet-training success is a measure of successful parenting. It will probably take us another generation before most parents can see toilet training as the child's own learning process. B Questions or comments should be addressed to Dr. T. Berry Brazelton, care of The New York Times Syndication Sales Corp., 122 E. 42nd St., New York, N.Y. 10168. Questions of general interest will be answered in this column; Dr. Brazelton regrets that unpublished letters cannot be answered to imitate parents and older siblings. B The development of receptive speech leads to the understanding of such concepts as: "This is your potty seat. Mine is the big one. Someday you'll go on yours like I do on mine." B The child be T. Berry Brazelton comes orderly and begins to put things in their places. Parents who are able to be patient until the child shows such signs usually between 2 and 4 years of age are unlikely to run into serious problems. Workers are using their lunch hours for everything but eating 'It appears that lunch time is becoming a catchall for taking care of personal business The traditional sit-down, "relax with your co-workers for an hour" time is basically gone. ' RICK M0KR, Steelcase Inc. say it's troubling that so many workers are maintaining a harried pace through lunch. As it is, they note, office workers generally are working longer hours than in previous decades, and fax machines, beepers and cellular phones tie them to the workplace even when they're off duty. "It's really important to clear one's head, and that often requires a change of venue," said David Schnall, a professor of management at Yeshiva University in New York City. Some workers are using their lunch breaks for hobbies and projects that they otherwise wouldn't have time to pursue. An architect attends a noon Mass; a lawyer tutors elementary school students; an art museum conservator visits her two sons for lunch at their day care center. There is so much lunch time driving by Washington area office workers, in fact, that it has created a "third rush hour" between 11:30 a.m. and 3 p.m., transportation officials say. Some management specialists lunch than women. Women are twice as likely as men to go shopping on their lunch breaks; men are more likely to take clients to lunch. Carolyn Brumbaugh, 45, a defense industry worker from An-nandale, Va., said she routinely eats at her desk and uses most of her lunch break to shop for groceries and clothes tasks that she has trouble squeezing into evenings and weekends, when she's busy chauffeuring her two children to music lessons and gymnastics practice. By Jacqueline L Salmon The Washington Post Donna Leigh, a systems manager for the Defense Department, spends at least 12 hours a day commuting and working at her job in Fairfax County, Va. She'd love to take a break when her lunch hour arrives, but to spend those 60 minutes eating at a restaurant' would be to squander precious time, Leigh says. Instead, she often drives to a nearby supermarket to pick up groceries or to the post office to mail packages. Sometimes she shops for clothes or fits in a doctor's appointment. Sometimes she stays at the office to attend a staff meeting. As for lunch, she snacks at her desk later in the afternoon. For Leigh, there's nothing remotely relaxing about the lunch hour. "It just feels like it's an extension of the day, to be honest," she said. It feels that way to more and more employees across the country. The practice of occasionally skipping one's lunch break to take care of pressing business is hardly new. But now many office workers SUNSHINE & Celebrate the Season x kN :i ui . .. The Greater Lake Worth minutes for lunch. More than half of the workers surveyed said they engage in other activities besides eating such as shopping, exercising or catching up on work during their lunch breaks. "It appears that lunch time is becoming a catchall for taking care of personal business, as well as work-related activities," said Rick Mohr, a spokesman for Steelcase Inc., an office-furniture manufacturer that commissioned the survey as part of its study of workplace trends. "The traditional sit-down, 'relax with your co-workers for an hour' time is basically gone." Women, in particular, are avoiding such lunches. The Steelcase survey found that men on average take 10 percent longer for make that sacrifice day in and day out, and the range of lunch-hour activities keeps growing. Longer daily commutes, along with the family responsibilities that working parents face when they get home, have shrunk the time available in the evening for personal errands so more workers are using the lunch hour to get those errands accomplished. At the same time, companies bent on improving productivity increasingly are scheduling lunch-hour office meetings and seminars, leaving their employees with no choice but to forgo a midday break. The lunch hour isn't even an hour anymore. A recent nationwide survey found that office workers on average take only 36 Chamber of Commerce Presents 1 997 Holiday Showcase J presented by f Very Special Arts Florida - Palm Beach County Joys & Toys w December 14, 1997 at 2 pm f I ': v , Duncan Theatre r V 5th ANNUAL SUNSHINE & SNOW FESTIVAL Saturday December 13th 10:am - 9:pm Sunday December 14th 12:Noon - 6:pm BRYANT PARK, LAKE WORTH Breakfast & Pictures with Santa 9:am Sat. 20 Tons of Snow Rides Games Food Beverages Live Animals Live Entertainment Arts & Crafts FUN FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY Admission After 2:pm Sat. $ 3.00 - Children under 12 Free SPONSORED BY "x ; ) Palm Beach Community College, Lake Worth 1 : - "Hosted by Kevin Kitchens of Sunny 104. 3 Celebrate with over 100 students and adults as they showcase their talents ... ti in dance, drama and music including: , South Florida Theatre of the Deaf A non-equity professional group Speaking with two voices one for the ear and one for the eye ' Donna Tucci's School of Dance " Young dancers who sparkle Tickets: $5 adults $2 for students Available at the Very Special Arts Office (56 1 ) 964-4822 (561 ) 966-6684 TDD or at the door I Pre-show reception 12:30 pm: refreshments, art displays and a holiday card sale VERY a nrin.nrr.fit nrpanization which provides cultural and artistic opportunities for Concours Auto Sales SPECIAL ' . The nprfnrmanrp will be interpreted for the deaf. Afrrr cilllUivii auu ouuivj wuuun.i.v. - r J MM J FLORIDA joys and Toys is brought to you by: """"Pf Bf.I.I SOUTH F.A.O. SCHWARZ LlTTI.F. PaIM FAMILY THEATRE . Sw.Ff.st of Palm Beach County, Inc. Siemens Sunnu Ideal Printing Republic Security Bank LAW OFFICES mi Magic Image sign language beryicm, , . ,, 1TU Ncl cnK, p A - - FOR MORE INFORMATION CALL THE G.L.W.C.C. AT SS2-4401 ; LIT Duncan Theatre at Palm Beach Community College ,

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