Democrat and Chronicle from Rochester, New York on October 24, 2015 · Page C5
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October 24, 2015

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Democrat and Chronicle from Rochester, New York · Page C5

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Rochester, New York
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Saturday, October 24, 2015
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Page C5
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DemocratandChronicle .com Saturday,October24,2015 Page5C PEARLS BEFORE SWINESTEPHAN PASTIS FORBETTER OR FOR WORSELYNN JOHNSTON SHOEGARY BROOKINS AND SUSIE MCNELLY REX MORGAN, M.D.WILSON & BEATTY FREDBASSETALEX GRAHAM MARMADUKEBRADANDERSON RUBESLEIGHRUBIN THEFAMILY CIRCUSBILKEANE ZIGGYTOMWILSON & TOMII HEATHCLIFF PETER GALLAGHER JANRICCLASSICSUDOKU INSTRUCTIONS: Complete the grid so that every row, column and 3x3 box contains the numbers 1 through 9 (no repeats). DIFFICULTY RATING: Gold AT LEFT: Answer to yesterday’s puzzle Looking for TV listings? The television grid appears each day on Page 2C. Looking for movie times? Go to DemocratandChronicle.com/section/movies for the latest times. DearDr. Roach: My husband had prostate cancer in 2013. He was treated with radiation, and was thought to be cured. Well, one year later, he found out he had cancer in his liver. He lived eight months before going into hospice for his last 15 days. Do you think the radiation of the prostate spread the cancer to his liver? If he had had only surgery, would the cancer not have spread? — B.V. Answer: Both radiation and surgery can both provide a good chance for cure in most patients with prostate cancer that is localized, meaning that it has not already spread. It is not clear which is better, and for any given man, radiation might be better than surgery, or vice versa, which is why the choice needs to be carefully individualized by the experts managing the prostate cancer, including a urologist, radiation therapist and possibly medical oncologist. Radiation doesn’t cause cancer to spread, so I think you can stop feeling that your husband did not get the cor rect treatment. It’s likely that a few cancer cells had already spread to the liver before he got radiation treatment. If he had elected to have surgery, the cancer cells still would have already been in the liver, he likely would have had the same outcome, and you probably would be wondering whether the surgery had caused the cancer to spread. I have found that after someone passes from cancer, their family and loved ones often second-guess their treatment: What if they had gone to a better hospital? What if they had tried a different diet or supplements? There is an endless list of things you might have done to try to change the outcome. However, the vast majority of the time, there is nothing for a family member to blame him- or herself for. There is no situation so bad that adding guilt on top of it can’t make it worse, and the guilt doesn’t help anything. I mentioned medical oncology — some early trials suggest that chemotherapy given in addition to radiation therapy may improve cure rates in some men with high-risk prostate cancer. DearAmy: Fall has begun, and the holiday season is fast approaching. I am a recover ing hoarder, and I’m digging myself out from all the stuff I own. I feel like if anyone gives me more “stuff,” I’ll want to scream. I want to know if it is polite and appropriate to send the following letter to loved ones: “Dear Loved One, I am glad you care enough about me to gift me at Christmas. However, I need to get rid of many of my possessions, which I don’t have room for. I don’t need any more. I don’t want to upset you, but I don’t want you to waste your money on something I’ll have to give away. I don’t need any more clothes, jewelry, books or knickknacks. I have too many already. I can’t use any soap or lotion unless it’s unscented for sensitive skin. Otherwise, it will break me out in bumps. I am allergic to wool. Red is my least favorite color. I can’t have sugar anymore. If you still want to give a gift, please ask me what I need or give me something I can use up.” Can you give me your opinion? — Recovering DearRecovering: First of all — hooray for you! You are tackling a very challeng- ing life change, and you are wise to be proactive about the holidays, which could trigger a hoarding cycle for you. My suggestion is that you keep your letter very brief, explaining your situation but eliminating your list, which is a little snarky. In your note, say that you would truly celebrate if your friends and family members contributed to a worthy cause of their choice. Let their generosity toward others be their primary gift to you. DearAmy: You missed the boat on the response to “Gary,” who wished to keep his friend’s cremated remains at his house. Too many people do not think this process through. Over the years working in the bereavement sector I have witnessed many sad endings to cremated remains not being given a final resting place. Two generations down the road are not going to want the urns of all of their ancestors sitting on a mantle. — Linda DearLinda: Great point! Radiation doesn’t cause one’s cancer to spread Recovering hoarder says no to holiday gifts Send Dr. Keith Roach your medical questions. Write to him at ToYourGoodHealth@med. cornell.edu

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