The Palm Beach Post from West Palm Beach, Florida on March 27, 1998 · Page 63
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March 27, 1998

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The Palm Beach Post from West Palm Beach, Florida · Page 63

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West Palm Beach, Florida
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Friday, March 27, 1998
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Page 63
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w S C THE PALM BEACH POST FRIDAY, MARCH 27, 1998 3F TODAY 13th Annual Palm Beach Boat Show, through Sunday on the Intracoastal Waterway along Flagler Drive between Clematis and Fern streets in West Palm Beach. Hours: 10 a.m.-8 p.m. Friday and Saturday; 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Sunday. Tickets $7; $2 kids 6-12. Call 833-5711. For a vacation family will love, compromise Question: Every year, it seems we're more tired when we come home from vacation than when we left. Because of the difference in our children's interests and ages our daughter is 5, and our son is 10 it's hard to find activities that they both enjoy. My wife and I spend too much time mediating squabbles and listening to complaints. With our hectic working lives, vacation needs to be a time of real recuperation. Is it possible to pick a vacation spot everyone will like? Answer: Keep two words in mind when planning family vacations: variety and compromise. Compromise means each family member gets to pick at least one favorite Closeness can cause conflict Brown Bag concert series featuring Bobby Pruitt and High Voltage, 11:30 a.m.-l:30 p.m. at Centennial Plaza in downtown West Palm Beach. Includes $5 lunch specials from downtown One major difference between partners in committed relationships is the degree of closeness each is able or willing to tolerate. The fact is that peo -IAS rt f - - -rr, f IRKING thing to do during the vacation, in return for being willing to participate in ac- tivities chosen by others. A plan that allows for variety enables the compromise to work. Instead of spending ple are just not the same when it comes to how much intimacy they want. The irony is that a closeness seeker and a distance seeker often find themselves married to one another, and this becomes a major theme in their conflict. We all seem to have the uncanny knack of drawing toward us one who chal PARENTS HELPLINE Usually, it is the distancer who has more power in the relationship. When one partner has something the other wants and can get only from them, this is power. Even though this is true, distancers often feels less powerful because closeness seekers use their own power more actively, trying desperately to get what they want. The power of the distance seeker is used more passively, by avoiding, putting off, rejecting and stonewalling. Consequently, the closeness seeker ends up feeling lonely and unloved. Although it may appear that the distance seeker is the more independent of the two, this is just an illusion. If the closeness seeker suddenly withdraws and stops caring, the distance seeker may find himself unbearably lonely, and the roles can be reversed, illustrating the delicate balance that enables many marginal marriages to continue. B Dr. Hugh R. Leavell is a marriage and family therapist with offices in Jupiter and West Palm Beach. Call him at 471-0067. restaurants. Bob Roberts' Society Orchestra, 1:30-3:30 p.m. at the Boynton Beach Civic Center, 128 E. Ocean Ave. Call 375-6240. Trish and the Troublemakers, 8-11 p.m. as part of Jazz in Jupiter at Sprazzo restaurant, 201 N. U.S. 1, Jupiter. No cover charge; reservation recommended. Call 575-9509. Kick the Can: An Exploration of Coloring Outside the Lines, student-directed one-act plays, 8 p.m. Friday and Saturday and 2 p.m. Sunday in Florida Atlantic University's Studio 2 on the central campus in Boca Raton. Tickets $5; FAU students free. Call 297-3737. Relay for Life, 24-hour team event to benefit American Cancer Society, starting 6 p.m. at Forest Hill High School in West Palm Beach, Carver Middle School in Defray Beach and Dwyer High School in Palm Beach Gardens. Call (800) 227-2345. One-Minute Therapist Dr. Hugh Leavell lenges us the most. It is most often the wife who is the closeness seeker, but not always. And it is almost always the closeness seeker who initiates contact with a therapist. If the distance seeker comes to therapy at all, it is usually because the closeness seeker has threatened to end the relationship. COMING SATURDAY Thumb sucking no cause for worry It's never too early for parents to sort out their feelings about thumb sucking and pacifiers. When a baby comes in for a three-week checkup, I often ask parents whether he gets his thumb into two weeks camping or lying on the beach, for instance, you might split the time between the two. Or you could choose a destination with enough options that each parent and child can find an enjoyable activity. Start to plan with a meeting in which all family members can list the vacation activities they enjoy most and least. From this list, construct a vacation that includes some elements from each person's list of preferences. Let's say you and your son love the great outdoors, but your daughter's afraid of bugs, and your wife considers roughing it to be a hotel without room service. This is not going to be a family of happy campers. So, consider visiting a national park with a comfortable lodge for those who aren't up for sleeping in a tent. Swimming facilities, playgrounds and a variety of park programs could keep your wife and daughter entertained while you and your son go hiking. If you pick a park near a city that is itself an attractive tourist destination, you can spend part of the vacation visiting the city's children's museum, zoo or historical sites. Even though family vacations are supposed to promote togetherness, time by yourself can be a key to , relaxation. Take turns entertaining the children while the other parent goes off alone. You can go swimming with the kids while your wife visits antiques shops, for example. She can reciprocate while you play golf. Split the kids up occasionally, too, with each of you taking one to the activity of his or her choice. Don't assume your children won't enjoy things that typically are considered adult pursuits. Many art museums, for instance, have children's programs or guides to paintings and sculpture that appeal to youngsters. The more the children participate in planning the trip, the more willing they'll be to go along with the : plan. Get guidebooks from the library and brochures : from travel agents to look over as a family. The Internet is another great source of travel information. Ask your librarian for children's books set in the places you plan to visit. Susan Crites Price and Tom Price are authors of The Working Parents Help Book (Peterson's, 1996). his mouth yet. In other words, can he comfort himself? Occasionally, a mother will quickly reply: "I don't let him. I don't want a thumb sucker. I've been taking his thumb out of his mouth. If he needs anything to suck on, he can have me as often as he wants. B Country Music Festival, 7 p.m. Saturday at the Clewiston Fairgrounds. Features Nashville recording artists Bart Roy and John Hornsby. Presented by the American Red Cross, Palm Beach County chapter. Tickets: $10; $5 under 12. Call 992-9703. 0 Fifth Annual Multicultural Fair, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Saturday at John F. Kennedy Middle Magnet School, 1901 Ave. S., Riviera Beach. Features ethnic food and entertainment, cultural exhibits, games and more. Admission is free. Call 845-4500. B Book signing and reading by authorplaywright E. Claudette Freeman with her new book Pieces and Me, 5-7 p.m. Saturday at Pyramid Books, 544-5 Gateway Blvd., Boynton Beach. Call 731-4422. B Book signing, 4 p.m. Saturday at Books-a-Million, 2471 Okeechobee Blvd. West Palm Beach. Nora Roberts will autograph her new book Hume-port. Call 615-6917. B Palm Beach Ballet Center's spaghetti dinner and performance, student showcase choreography and silent auction, 12:30 p.m. and 3 p.m. at St. Marks School on Bums Road in Palm Beach Gardens. Tickets are $7 for adults and $5 for children. Free for children 5 and under. Call 844-6603. B The Whales of Randy Puckett, exhibition and sale of sculptures to benefit the Wild Dolphin Project of Jupiter and the Sarasota Dolphin Research Program. The Whales of Randy Puckett gallery is temporarily housed at the Bluffs Shopping Center, 4050 S. U.S. 1, Jupiter. The exhibit is open Saturday through April 5. Gallery hours are 10 a.m.-4 p.m.; reception hours are 5-8 p.m.; Sunday reception hours are 11 a.m.-6 p.m. Call 745-5552. Very few people go to college sucking their thumbs or pacifiers. The children who keep on as late as kindergarten or the early grades are those in whom the habit has been reinforced by parents who interfered with it. If you want to set a stubborn pattern in a child, just, try to interrupt it at a time when he needs solace. Parents who are bothered to see a child sucking his thumb should consider a pacifier. It's a stressful world for small children. They are likely to seek some sort of self-comforting as their way of managing the stresses. I see this as a very healthy sign of competence, not as a dirty or shameful habit. Parents should try to see thumb-sucking for what it is: a very effective way for a child to calm himself down and pull himself together when he is tired, frustrated or overwhelmed. As long as the sucking doesn't consume an excessive part of the child's life or become a way in which he withdraws from all kinds of pressure, parents shouldn't worry about it. Questions or comments should be addressed to Dr. T. Berry Brazelton, care of The New York Times Syndication Sales Corp., 122 E. 42nd St., New York, N. Y. 10168. T. Berry BrazeKon Otherwise, I'll give him a pacifier." Sometimes, parents will disagree on this issue and will ask me which is better. To give parents a little perspective, I explain that thumb sucking is a healthy, self-comforting pattern. At birth, a baby is equipped with the hand-to-mouth, or Bab-kin, reflex. When he's upset or trying to settle down, he will resort to this as a way of controlling himself. The pattern seems to be built in. Babies who make use of it are easier to live with. ; Won Stade shows diversity, talent Temple to screen award-winning 'Way Home? Concert Review ' By Bill F. Faucett ': Special to The 1'alm Beach Post PALM BEACH Few would ; associate the legendary American mezzo-soprano Frederica Von Stade with the Broadway stage. ; Since her acclaimed 1970 debut ; with the Metropolitan Opera, she ): has gained a reputation for stun- ning interpretations of an unusual-; ly large and diverse repertoire. Von Stade is as comfortable sing-! ing roles crafted by Monteverdi or r. 1 ft M , .A. Marvin Hier said recently. Hier founded the Wiesenthal Center and accepted the Oscar Monday night in Los Angeles. Narrated by actor Morgan Freeman, The Long Way Home follows European Jews after then-liberation from the Nazi death camps in 1945 to the founding of Israel three years later. The story is told through historic footage and photos, interviews and dramatic exerpts from diaries and letters read by actors Edward Asner, Michael York, Miriam Margolyes and Sean Astin who, like Freeman, donated their services. PAUL LOMARTIRE The documentary feature The Long Way Home, which won an Academy Award this week, will be celebrated at a special breakfast at 10 a.m. Sunday at Temple Emanu-El of Palm Beach. Tickets for the screening and the bagel and lox breakfast are $8. For reservations, call the temple at 832-0804 from 8:30 a.m. to 4 p.m. today. Produced by Moriah Films The Jack & Pearl Resnick Film Division of the The Simon Wiesenthal Center the film was made possible by more than $1 million in financing from Pearl Resnick, a member of Temple Emanu-El. "If it wasn't for Pearl Resnick, I doubt if Moriah Films would be here today at all," Rabbi variety of styles. Debussy's gorgeous Trois Chanson de Bilitis highlighted Von Stade's masteiy of French. She has a keen feel for the sound of the language and was able to imbue the music with an urgency that was heightened by perfect inflection of the text. The simple melodies selected from Granados' Collection of Songs in Antique Style were effective, with good contrast. Von Stade gave a nice bounce to The Maja of Goya, while she was perfectly coy and mysterious in The Discrete Kameau as sne is singing iviozai i able voice gave an attractive warmth to every note, even though she occasionally gave in to a fetching raspy quality that made the song innocent and spontaneous. And in Kern's I've Told Every Little Star, from Music in the Air, Von Stade's sense of wonderment and longing were palpable. Two works by Bernstein were most attractive. Von Stade gave his delightful trifle on various French recipes, La bonne cuisine, a vigorous reading, and the brief but stirring Greeting, a movement from his Arias and Barcarolles, was a lovely contemplation in the American-romantic tradition of Barber and was beautifully delivered. Von Stade also presented numerous other selections in a wide or uebussy. But lately she has taken an interest in American music, and the fruits of her attraction were on display during her Wednesday recital at The Society of the Four Arts. As she effortlessly weaved her way through music by Leonard Bernstein and Jerome Kern, Von Stade showed that she deserves to be considered one of the foremost singers of this canon. Kern's Bill, from Showboat, il Maja. Von Stade's musicianship and personal charm are so complete that mentioning a few minor faults, like slight intonation problems in her lowest register, hardly seems worth it. Her fine accompanist, Charles Wadsworth, did an excellent job throughout the evening. His grasp of the various musical styles was secure, as was his ensemble playing. lustrated the point. Her full, ph- .i i v x x x x w - - 1,1 i i J h-rrr. 150 Exhibitors t?'$ utr stuff jDave Brubeclc The Byrdo ;OpUS Crafts, ArtsJam, Entertainment Just $4, Kids Free (12 & under) March 28 March 29 10-5 11-5 . Downtown Stuart Memorial Park For information, call 283-6846 or see stage schedule at www. wpsl.com A three-year relationship that won't turn ugly when it ends. Ix-asing a Sutuin isn't like leasing a lot of other cars. For one thing, we w,ilk you through the u hole process. so it s easy lo understand. And once the term ot the , , lease is up (in three year), you can either relinance uhats lett. or u can just give the car back to us. And we'll always have our memories. SATU1N. $169 MONTH 36-month lease, $1,593 due at signing 1 CU5 No security deposit required 3- P,wt- i,Ji J ""iJ ! '-a-' km."" tmvmwm, M. nd twnwlJ1"" i't,WSf 'l.'H' ,, rri. --..-r. tnnfJ h'm nnfit f - ' wrif i t rlv i'- iwvw' iJ U. .;..: j- .,-.. r $) - -'! v"f V W 5" wr,,-'. . - -w r..- '"u-y.-w -.vr ," W J 1 " i ""in It .fnw V n...c W -t W """' """"' , i, , f f , , t m v n , ' v im v I'll I t f m n n f c t J Savana i -t Coconut -leads ' , ; . , and 15 ITIOI! 1 9 93.7 HGVL MARTIN EMORIAL yUnllh Susums Adclphia A m C 1 1 1 1 1 C Mil wstut450 ,1. rr 6(A ilMir'lftlll tcX STY' 5

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