Arizona Republic from Phoenix, Arizona • Page 37

THE ARIZONA REPUBLIC 'MOM, I'M IN PRISON' When Steve Oedekerk needed a foil for a prank, he knew where to turn. C5. 'TIME TO SAY GOODBYE' The assisted-suicide issue's harsh impact on a family is examined. C6. MONDAY SEPTEMBER 1, 1997 I Bunker mentality: Dad still insists on His Chair 4st V- By Jeff Guinn Knight-Ridder Newspapers TV's Archie Bunker said it best: "Outta my chair! Throughout recorded human history, the unbendable bond, the unshakable love, the unbreakable link has been between the king and his throne, the cowboy on his horse, and Dad in his chair.

Psychologists call it "territoriality." Women have been known to describe it as the equivalent of the devotion that male dogs lavish on fire hydrants. Whatever the genetic imprint or social symbolism, most families acknowledge an overstuffed perch to be occupied by the head of the household and no other. "If we've got company and somebody from outside the immediate family sits in my chair, I'll keep my mouth shut and sit somewhere else," acknowledges Rich Billings of Arlington, Texas. "But when it's just us, I'll kick out anybody who gets in my chair. My wife, son, daughters.

I don't care. It's my chair, and they know that." Modern times demand more widespread acknowledgment of what cantankerous Archie Bunker would have denied unto death: Yes, the popular theory is "man" and his chair. However, pride of chair is not necessarily reserved for a single gender. "Hey, I have my own chair (that) nobody can sit in but me and my granddaughters," says Tarrant County, Texas, Commissioner Dionne Bagsby, laughing. "I did when I was married, and I do now.

I think what having your own chair is, is having your own coping space, a place where you can be and feel comfortable, in charge. People grow up and see that their parents have this, so they will one day want it." Please see TIMES, Page C3 Knight-Ridder Newspapers Styles have changed since Archie Bunker, but-dads still find refuge in their own living-room chairs. 24hours SQBlDSln DD rH 7 u. i ii aiiHHniiia 4 imniiM BILL G00DYK00N17 Republic Columnist President on par with other duffers ecently, while playing golf on va- cation, President Clinton shot a 79 at the Farm Neck Golf Club in Oak Bluffs, Mass. At least that's what he claimed.

For someone who doesn't play golf for a living, a 79 is remarkably good. Par on this course, for instance, is 72. (Par, for those of you who don't know much about golf, is the number of times a skilled player is supposed to hit the ball during a round. For me, on the other hand, par is a dream only slightly less reachable than taking over the lead role in Seinfeld or be coming the ruler of a tiny tropical paradise. My current golf goal is to break 100.) Not to question the veracity of the president of the United States they ap point independent counsels for that but I find it a little hard to believe that he scored so well.

He admittedly helped himself a bit. He acknowledged taking a few extra shots off the first tee because we didn have time to go to the driving range," which is sort of like not counting the first couple of doughnuts because you didn't have time for dinner last night. In other words, he cheated. Wait just a second, you say. I'm accus ing the leader of the Free World, the man in charge of the most powerful nation on Earth, of cheating at golf? I am.

First among equals But it's no big deal. After all, isn't the president just first among equals? Isn't he one ot us, only with a bigger salary and that cool airplane they make movies about? In fact, there's hardly anything I can think of that the president could do that would be more representative of the people he serves than cheat at golf. That's because at one time or another, anyone who has played the game has done it. "Oh, yeah," Neil Guess, an assistant professional at Camelback Golf Club, said. "If you ask people, without taking names or anything, over 50 percent, I can almost bet you," will admit having cheated at one time or another.

And the real number is even higher, Guess guesses (sorry). "It's probably more like 90." As a pro, Guess is aware of several outstanding methods of cheating, in much the same way that a detective knows a lot of ways to rob a bank. I'm a pretty patriotic guy, so I'll pass these secrets along, in case the president ever wants to experiment with something more creative than simply taking extra shots and not counting them on his scorecard. He might try, for example, the walking kick. "It's a technique to use when you're looking for extra yardage," Guess said.

"You just keep kicking the ball as you walk toward it give it a good, solid kick. Just make sure that the people you are playing with have their heads turned or are over a hill or you're out in front of them enough that they don't see you." The old towel drop Another nefarious tactic: When walking the course, drape a towel over your bag. When you hit a shot into the woods and lose the ball, start looking for it and "accidentally" drop the towel with an extra ball inside. "Then, when you pick up the towel, continue to look" Guess said. "You don't want to be the guy to find it.

If the other guy finds it, he'll have no idea." That same technique works for the "slip drop" when you carry an extra ball and either let it drop behind your leg or drop it through a hole in your pocket. Again, let your playing partner "find" it. And act surprised. "You definitely have to have a certain degree of believability," Guess said. "You never want your opponent or the other players in your party to become suspicious of you." Guess doesn't cheat, he said, and he frowns on people who do.

"Rules are rules," he said. "There are no exceptions in the rules for the president." He took on a more reverent tone before continuing: "There's no exception for the president of the PGA." Now there's a guy with his priorities straight. Bill Goodykoontz can be reached at 271-8828, or at bill.goodykoontzpni.com via e-mail. nnjiunip Vi SEASON POEViEW hit NBC's upcoming ensemble comedy Union Square finds itself in the 7:30 p.m. time slot between Friends and Seinfeld on Thursdays.

Kir-stie Alley (far left) stars in Veronica's Closet, which will air after Seinfeld. 4 -r JT NBC photos I can hear you say it: "Yadda, yadda, yadda" water-cooler conversation starter, Seinfeld is the ratings anchor on the network's most important night, Thursday. It's helped drive NBC to ratings dominance and may help keep it there by serving as a platform for launching new shows. Each of the Hot Mamas, for example, has had an intimate relationship with Jerry Seinfeld. Each has aired in a time slot adjacent to his.

Each has been looked up and down by the millions of viewers who are either getting ready to watch him or have just finished watching him. Each now heads out on her own, sort of. The women (Brooke Shields, Sharon Lawrence, Lea Thompson and Tea Leoni) and their respective shows (Suddenly Susan, Fired Up, Caroline in the City and The Na- Please see 2 NEW, Page PAGI have duties NBC's Monday spun from 'nothing' By Dave Walker The Arizona Republic A show about absolutely nothing, Seinfeld means absolutely everything to NBC. The Hot Mamas of Monday prove it. If you breathe, you know that the Peacock Network is paying a fortune to air Seinfeld this season, which may be the series' last.

Jerry Seinfeld himself gets a reported $1 million an episode, not counting the uncountable millions he's making from rerun syndication. His supporting players Jason Alexander, Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Michael Richards collectively bargained about a year ago to get a reported $600,000 each per episode. Pencil out the numbers any way you like, the conclusion will be: worth it. In addition to being TV's most consistently sly comedy, cultural touchstone and Just because it 's a weekday doesn 't mean life has to be all work and no play. Venture out of your home or office and enjoy some of the things happening in the next 24 hours: Monday matinee Introduce your children to Tevye and his children in the family musical classic, Fiddler on the Roof, at 2 this afternoon at Herberger Theater Center.

Fiddler is the story of the traditions of village life in pre-revolution-ary Russia and the problems of Tevye and his daughters. The play is filled with some of the best songs ever written for the stage. students, seniors, children 12 and under, half price today with an adult admission. Herberger's Center Stage, 222 E. Monroe Phoenix.

503-5555 or 252-8497. Harmonica man Blues and nothing but the blues will be performed by Charlie Musselwhite at 8 tonight in the Rhythm Room. The harmonica player is making a rare Phoenix appearance. $12. 1019 E.

Indian School Road, Phoenix. 256-4842. 'Chess Night' Players on all skill levels are welcome to participate in casual chess matches at 7 tonight at Cafe Espresso, Borders Books Music, 2402 E. Camelback Road, Suite 200, Phoenix. Free.

957-6660. Compiled by Linda Holt To have your event considered for this column, please submit information on events of communitywide interest to "24 Hours" by fax (271-8884) or mail to The Arizona Republic, P.O. Box 2245 NL-18, Phoenix, AZ 85002. at home "7 7 a Tony BustoVTne Arizona Republic Breadwinner moms still the baths and managing the bedtime routine even when their husbands stay home 45 hours a week or more. Unlike traditional fathers, the breadwinner moms tend to know their child's schedule, friends and classes, even though they are at work all day.

Despite appearances, researcher Robert Frank, a part-time teacher at Loyola University Chicago, said, "I wouldn't describe it as a second shift. Maybe that's because I'm a male." He's also been a stay-at-home dad for 11 years. Some of the mom's extra work might be chalked up to vestigial guilt, Frank speculated. Society still expects mothers to be primary caregivers, no matter how demanding their jobs are. Some moms also do more at home because their standards are higher.

"My tolerance for the piles that grow is less than his," said Susan Baylies, a teacher married to Peter Baylies, editor of the Massachusetts-based newsletter At Home Dad, whose in there and volunteer to do the baths and the go-to-bed stuff because it's my only time with the kids." In Frank's family, he does almost everything, said his wife, Linda, a hospital administrator. In fact, he does so much dinner, dishes and laundry, arranging play dates and piano lessons and doctor visits that she still has time for exercise and a choral group. Inequality at home, however, is the hottest topic on a fledgling Internet e-mail discussion group for wives of stay-at-home dads. This is also a prime topic when women get together at the At Home Dads convention while the fathers are listening to a range of speakers and attending workshops. The second annual convention will be held in November at Oakton Community College in Des Plaines, 111.

Estimates of the number of stay-at-home dads range from 300,000 to 2 million, depending on how they are defined. Robert Frank defines them as lease see AT-HOME, Page C2 A woman's work is not done when she leaves the office By Lynn Smith Los Angeles Times We've heard lots in recent years about stay-at-home dads, pioneers of role reversal who brave loss of income, jokes about their masculinity and the suspicion of mothers in tot lots in order, to keep their kids out of day care. Behind every Mr. Mom, it stands to reason, there must also be a Ms. Dad.

But we haven't heard much until recently from the breadwinner mothers. No wonder: It turns out they've been busy. According to a study presented last week at the American Psychological Association convention in Chicago, many of these moms revert to tradi tional roles when, they come home from work making dinner, giving mailing list provided the subjects for Frank's study. But, she added, "I jump 3.