Covina Argus from Covina, California on April 18, 1908 · Page 7
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Covina Argus from Covina, California · Page 7

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Covina, California
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Saturday, April 18, 1908
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Page 7
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TftV THE I ft COVINA TURN ITURE CO. FOR ANYTHING IN THE LINE OF FURNITURE Of FLOOR COWRIE SAFEST PLACE TC TRADE W. Q. CUSTEK, Manager Pooley's (ovioa Nurseries Choice ferns and potted plants, roses, carnations and other ornamental trees in season. Snles yard, corner of First street, and San Bernardino Road. Droll Incident In the Reign of James I. of England. A BIT TOO SHREWD. A TRICK ON AN AMBASSADOR The Different Interprctntions of the Same Acts Penorr.-cc! by a Croohety Spaniard and a Hard Hcf.did and Canny Old Scotch Butcher. It is said that Kinir .l;;m<s I. on removing to.London was '.Vailed Up-:!! ll.V the Spanish timbassador. a n.an of err. ditlon, but who had a crotchet in h'« head that every country should have :'•• professor of signs to teach him and the like of him to understand one another. The ambassador was lamenting one day before the king this great desideratum throughout all Europe, when the king said to him: "Why. I have a professor of signs In the northernmost college in my dominions—vise, at Aberdeen—but it is a great way off, perhaps COO miles." "Were. It 10,000 leagues off I shall see him." said the ambassador, "and .inm determined to set out in two or three days." The king saw lie had committed himself and wrote, or caused to be written, to the University of Aberdeen, stating the case and desiring the professors to put him off some way or make the best of him. The ambassador arrived, was received with great solemnity, but soon began to Inquire which of their, had the honor to be professor of signs. Being told that the professor was absent in the highlands and would return nobody knew when, the ambassador said, "I will wait his return, though it were twelve months." Seeing that this would not do and that they had to entertain him at a great expense all the while, they contrived a stratagem. There was one Geordy. a butcher, blind of an eye, a droll fellow, with much wit and roguery about him. He was got, instructed to be professor of signs, but not to speak on pain of death. Geordy cheerfully undertook the role. The ambassador was told that the professor of signs would be at home next day, at which he rejoiced greatly. Next day Geordy was gowned, wlg- ged and' placed in a chair of state in a room in the college, all the professors and the ambassador being in a» adjoining room. The ambassador was shown into Geordy's room and left to converse with him as well as he could, the professors awaiting the issue with fear and trembling. The ambassador bold up one of his fingers to Geordy; Geordy held up two of his. The ambassador held up three; Geordy clinched his fist and looked stern. The ambassador then took an orange from his pocket and held it up; Geordy took a piece of barley cake from his pocket and held that up. After which the ambassador bowed to him and retired to the other professor, who anxiously inquired his opinion of their In-other. "He Is a perfect miracle," said the ambassador. "I would not give him for the wealth of the Indies." "Well," said the professors, "to descend to particulars.'' "Why," said the ambassador, "I first held up one finger, denoting that there is one God; he held up two, signifying that these are the Father and Ron. I held up throe, meaning the Father, the Son and Ilrly Ghost; he clinched his fist, to say that these three are one. I then took out an orange, signifying the goodness of Cud. who gives his creatures not only the necessaries, but the luxuries, of life, upnn which the wonderful man presented a piece of bread, showing that It was the staff of life and preferable to every luxury." The professors were glad that matters had turned out so well; so, having got quit of the ambassador, they next got Geordy to hear his version of th<» signs. "Well, Geordy, how have you come on and what do you think of you man'.'" "The rascal!" says Geordy. "What did he do lirst, think ye? He held up one finger, as much as to say, Yor. have 'i!>!.v one eye. Then I held up two, meaning that my one eye was perhaps as good as both his. Then the fellow held up three of his fingers, to say thai* there were but three eyes between IM and then I was so mad at the bcor.n 'drel that I sleeked my neive and wa> to corne a whack on the, side of hh> head and would ha' done it, too, but for your sakes. Then the rascal did not stop with his provocation here, but, forsooth, takes out an oranue. as much as to say, Your poor, betrgar'.y, i uld country car.uoi product- that. I show- it' a bear bannock. ;. \' I--:, 11- a farthing On* Venture In Which the Captain Overreached Himself. One of Uncle Sam's customs officials, noted for his success in unmasking smugglers, said the other day in a discussion of n customs officer's duties: "One must be shrewd, but not too shrewd; otherwise one overreaches oneself, like Captain Harrow of Isles- borough. "(.'aplain Harrow of Islosborough was Irading at Key West in a small vessel. r,;isiness lo.ik him up the coast 1'.- Tampa bay. and lie houulit twenty d wn chicken:? I'ii-ni a fanner at .-£4 a do;:en. "The chieUens were all sb'.os some a few da;.;' old and no bigger than canary birds; some Cat and large, like tin-key gobblers. The captain expected to make a lot of money < .it of them. lie was very shrewd at a trade. "Well, at Key West a hotel man came aboard and looked the chickens over. " 'They are fine birds,' he said. 'How much?' "'If you pick them out yourself.' said Captain Harrow shrewdly, 'I'll have to charge you $(> a do/en. If 1 pick them out, I can let you have them for $:.',.' "'All right. You pick them out,'said the hotel man. . "Captain Harrow picked out a dozen chickens of the canary bird si/.e. " 'Here you are, twelve prime broilers,' he said, with a leer. "Go ahead,' said the hotel man calmly; 'another dozen.' "The uext dozen was of necessity larger. " 'Go on,' said the hotel man. 'Keep on picking them out.' "And the third down was larger still. The captain looked at his patron anxiously. " 'Keep right on.' "The next dozen was tine and plump, and the next comprised the biggest and fattest of the chickens. " 'Keep right on picking them out, captain.' "Then at last Captain Harrow saw how he had overreached himself. The hotel man bought his whole lot of chickens at $3, and thus the captain lost on the speculation $20 In cash, to say nothing of feed and labor."—Cincinnati Enquirer. Property Owners Take Notice. I have twenty clients who have property and cash \vlio want ne.reage, and groves from 2 to 20 ncrc-a List your groves and acreage with me, for stile or exchange. FRANK L. FHAK'V, Room (i, Slant on Bldg., Pasadena. For Sale Second grade potatoes, 81.0(1 per sack. W. M. Viurcn. Telephone Home I!1!M). THE WORLD DRYING UP. Possibility That the Human Race Will Die of Thirst. We are to die of thirst. Comparatively few persons know the suffering involved in a thirst for which there Is no help at hand. The consuming thirst more than the pnin of any wound makes the battlefield a hell. Yet death by thirst is the doom forecast for the race by grim scientists. Geologists find that the fresh water supply of the globe is failing. They have data which point to the gradual withdrawal of the streams and other bodies of water from the surface. Both In Africa and central Asia and, Indeed, In all the great levels the water beds are drying up. A great number of lakes well known In the historical age have entirely disappeared. For example, Lake Chiroua, in Africa, has vanished with- iu recent years, as has ulso Luke Ngamj. discovered by Livingstone. Lake Tchad is more than half dried up. For centuries bodies of water In central Asia have been evaporating and the deserts extending. Where 2.000 years ago great cities stood In east Turkestan there are found only vast anil depressing stretches of sand. The river Tarini, once a principal Asiatic mute, is almost gone, and Lob- Xor, formerly four times (lie area of Lake Oeneva, is now but a shallow marsh. The same sad conditions are noted In Kniop"an Itussi,;. .Novgorod, tile most pushing elty in the czar's distracted realm, was surrounded by water in the middle ages. \Vhile we may be sure tint the fat.- v.'l.ieh the geologists suggest for humanity Is very far away, the faels recited to show this drying up process are runvliicliig proof;! of the need of preserving our forests with more care. -- SI. I'aul Pioneer Press. ed him a meaning that I «H for him nor his n I ha' this. l:ut. !.. eluded ('eordy, " didn't thrash U.i drei!"-l.ond-i'! T. KILL THE COUGH AND CURE THE LUNGS WITH Dr. King's scavery r f^ n ^^^xrf^icn ^- s»5o. •*• j ***-**^ •' 11 si (8 ^*** * ^ SOp. t^r $) 00 1 USI ^(fOLDS T»ia( BoHIo Free AND All. THROrtT AMI) FJIMOTrtOUBLES. Select Your Route Patrick: H. Tolly Cement Pipe flanufacturer ALL SIZES AND IN ANY QUANTITY Estimates furnished.-—All work guaranteed. Agent for KANSAS CEMENT Large or small quantities. Yards, Axtisa Avenue, just north of San IJernardino Road Telephone, Home 3249 PostoHice Address, Covina I. N. WILSON The Blacksmith With the most skillful mechanics and the best equipment we can do your work in the most workmanlike and best manner in shorter time and at a reasonable cost to you. Wo. also carry a line of Farm Implements, Wagons, Etc, and if you arc thinking 1 of purchasing a vehicle os any kind we in- vile you'tocall and look over our line and talk the matter over. We will guarantee you a square deal and save you a few dollars besides. TOURIST CARS To the EAST Via New Orleans, El Paso or Ogden PorsotlJillvConilucUMi Tourist Excursions front Los Angeles to New Orleans', Washington, Cincinnati, Louisville, Chicago, St. Louis, K.msas City, Denver, Omaha, Minneapolis, St. Paul and other points in the Kast without change of cars. Through the wanner climate of the South, with its rice and cotton fields; or over the route of the Pioneers of M'>, and across ('treat Salt Lake- -"going to sea on a train." 1). 15. SCH.KNCK, Agent. Covina Hume phone 1-M of Cl. L. TKA.VIS! Commercial A "font, Pomona Home plimic. id; Sunset M.iin 70 Southern Pacific Los Angeles Ot'lico, MM.) S. Spring St., corner Sixth A Test Case. "I'm a 'bcaiity dorior,' " announced the stranger with the hand satchel fall | of cosmetics and massage machines. | "Do you think I could gut any practice ; around here':" "Vei.ii make u^ly things pretty, don't poii':'' drawled the old fanner in the ipi-rkled shirt. "That's my business, Hlr." , "Waal, i!' yeon'll go down back of my ' liarn yeiiii'il tind an old slate cov< red j ;-ow with one eye find one horn and I : wrinkles like <-;i/ials fill over her face. Slie's the u.'-'liest row In seven states, iiinl if ;, c.,!i e;m make, her pretty I'll' urn-e liiat yeuii be a 'beauty doctor* an* ! ';ve vei.ii a dulhir."-•''hi'-ago News. .-' 'juid, con y ;, et th.it I 1 the scoizu- i.-kl v. Tl;e a»ilre •>( sum*- ii" 1 " would seem to indicate that their tailors --an't tsH the UI0"l:n.-Ucc l,.-tV, e.'ll a lit UUU & C<*Q-New York Tni.i-.-i. Apparent. or, r..'-." |.<'-'aii the nc'.v ac:..•.. ••!.<:; .!!•• .'. on Mi-- Mr. radio-ii u ho v. role that maga/lue ;: -I .';;•.hl!i I'or US'.'" ' i!ii'-rnip!c'l Ni:nfch. "but of ,01.: ni.ib r-ialid lli.il I don't l..:.-:iii--.- ol' II.a! .-oi t of Iking." ,'ir ••• I i::eiv. thai. 1 ri.zid thft - rt.i.ad.-.phi.-i I'f.-s.-i. Tulare County Lands arc selling more rapidly than at any time in the history of the state. Why? Because the land is fine, the water pure and climate conditions unexcelled for the growing- of fruits, vegetables and alfalfa. Tulare County raises the cleanest oranges and the earliest. Though young in development about 3000 cars of oranges will be shipped this season. The K rr: 'I"-' industry is one of the surest in- vestments of all, and peaches, apricots, prunes, figs, olives and all small fruits grow to perfection. We have sold over ''00 acres ol this land in the par>t two weeks. Tin's shows how it is going. We have for this week one exceptional bargain. 1M) acres only 3 miles from a good town, directly on the railroad. Fine soil, no hard pan nor alkali, !'<>r only $25 an Acre We have seen these, land-, and c;.n tell you their qualities, or come and go up there with u-» and see lor yoursell. Phone 5008 J. H. MATTHEWS COVINA, CAI

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